by Shea Balik
“You…” Jazz squeaked. Then he cleared his throat and started again. “You killed people who didn’t do anything wrong?”
“As much as I’d like to say no, I promised not to lie to you.” There was so much Wilder had to be ashamed of, especially the first couple of years he’d worked for the Council. “It took me a few years to realize that just because Refugio said someone was a criminal didn’t make it so. After figuring that out, I went to Trygg, who was the reason I’d wanted to be a Council enforcer to begin with.”
He could see the question in Jazz’s eyes, but his mate didn’t ask. Wilder could explain about Trygg another time. “When I told Trygg about my suspicions that Refugio was having people who opposed him killed, Trygg not only confirmed it, but helped me to make that person disappear without actually hurting them.
“If Refugio had ever found out that we were relocating people he’d sent us to execute, we would have been killed.” It was the only thing that had given Wilder some peace about the ones he hadn’t been able to save.
“Then why did you do it?” Jazz asked.
It was a question Wilder had asked himself over the years. “Because if I quit, someone would have been hired to replace me. That person might not care that they were killing innocent people. I just couldn’t live with myself if that happened.”
His mate placed a kiss to Wilder’s shoulder, then his lips, then his nose. “You’re a very kind and amazing man, Wilder Frost.”
“So are you, my mate.” Wilder gave Jazz a kiss of his own before continuing. “Now that the new Council has taken over, and the new, more inclusive laws have been established, I want to make sure no one else is hurt by the old laws and bigotry that ran through much of the shifter population.”
They didn’t say anything else. Instead they stared into each other’s eyes for quite a while. He could see Jazz’s mind processing what he’d said, but he didn’t ask Wilder anything else. He wasn’t sure when they’d closed their eyes and fallen asleep, but for the first time in a long time, he’d felt true peace settle over him as he held his mate in his arms all night long.
CHAPTER 10
“Are you sure I should be here?” Jazz’s voice was breathy as he tried to calm the anxiety pulsing through his system while he and Wilder waited for Saber to see them.
“Positive, my mate.” Wilder lifted up their joined hands and kissed Jazz’s knuckles. “Having you by my side is important to me. Plus, Saber said he expected you, too.”
Much to his astonishment, at breakfast after their first night together, Wilder had asked if he and Jazz could meet with the Council Leader. A part of him had thought maybe his mate had just said he’d quit but would find a reason why that wasn’t possible. But, sure enough, not only was Wilder going to resign, he was doing it with Jazz by his side.
According to Wilder, as mates, he felt all major life decisions should be dealt with together, as a team. It had touched Jazz that Wilder felt that way. Yet, at the same time, it made him feel like shit for making his mate quit his job in the first place.
After Wilder’s confession as to why he loved his job so much, Jazz had been experiencing a huge amount of guilt. Wilder clearly was trying to make their world a better place, to help those who most needed a champion. How could he take his mate away from such an important job for his own selfish reasons?
It had caused him to question his own place in life. Both Iniko and Greyson had been trying to help Jazz not only deal with his emotional issues, but also find him a place in Miracle where Jazz could truly feel like he was a part of the town.
He enjoyed knowing he was helping the residents of Miracle get into homes. Although, for now they were apartments with multiple people living in each one, to try and get as many people from having to live in tents as possible, using porta-potties and showering in a makeshift bathing tent with mostly cold water.
It gave him a sense of purpose to know he had hand in building the town he had decided to call home. But construction, especially his typical assignment of painting, wasn’t something he loved. If it wasn’t for the fact it made him feel better to know he was doing what he could for Miracle, Jazz would have hated his job.
Well, that wasn’t entirely true. Most of the people he worked with, especially his boss, Zayden, were friendly. He wasn’t sure he’d consider any of them friends, but he did enjoy the time he spent with them.
Now he was beginning to think he shouldn’t have lied to Iniko or Greyson about what he was good at. He may not have a lot of skills he could fall back on, but being as isolated as he’d been growing up, Jazz had learned how to do one thing.
“Wilder, Jazz,” Saber opened the door to his office and gestured for them to join him. “Thanks for waiting. I hope you don’t mind if I asked a few others to join us.”
Jazz stopped in the doorway, shocked to find the man’s office with so many people inside. Wilder was just resigning. How many people were needed for that to happen?
Although, Saber couldn’t possibly know why they’d asked for the meeting, so why so many people? Especially these people. Chadwick wasn’t exactly a surprise as he was Saber’s mate, but he had no clue why Alpha Edrick, Greyson, Iniko, Draco, and all remaining six members of the Council sat around the room, their gazes fixed on Jazz.
Fear slithered up and down his spine as he suddenly wished he was anywhere but there. He should have just told Wilder to keep his damn job, since it was obvious they’d guessed he was about to quit, and they blamed Jazz for it.
Gods, he hoped he would make it out of that room alive. The glare Iniko was giving him, indicated there was at least one person out for his blood. The look in Greyson’s eyes confused him, as he appeared hurt, or maybe disappointed. That actually would make sense if Greyson believed Jazz was being selfish by keeping Wilder from doing his job.
“Ummmm.” Wilder glanced around the room, the tension in his body causing his back and shoulders to straighten a bit more. “Jazz and I really just needed to talk to you, Council Leader.”
Before anyone else could say a word, Iniko let out a huff. “And if Jazz McLiar Pants had told the truth from the beginning, we wouldn’t all be here feeling betrayed, lied to, deceived, mislead, tricked, conned, hoodwinked even.”
Greyson gently placed a hand over his mate’s mouth. “Sweetness, calm down. First off, you were using synonyms for the same idea. Second, it was Jazz’s decision to disclose his abilities. Maybe there was a reason he didn’t tell us what he could do that had nothing to do with us.”
When Greyson took his hand away, Iniko crossed his arms over his chest and continued to glare at Jazz. “It’s my job to find what everyone is good at.”
Oh shit, they know.
“But Jazz never even gave me a hint. He duped me into believing he had no skills.” Iniko’s lips twisted into a scowl.
Chadwick let out a chuckle. “Admit it, you’re just mad because you weren’t the one to figure it out.”
Iniko stuck out his tongue at Chadwick, which only made Saber’s mate laugh harder.
“Enough,” Alpha Edrick commanded. “We’re not here to accuse Jazz of lying. As Greyson said, it is his decision on what he wishes to do with his life, not ours.” Then those piercing blue eyes that had a way of getting the hardest of men to talk, turned on Jazz. “What we’re curious about, is what you want to do?”
“Would someone please tell me what’s going on?” Wilder asked, his gaze fixed on Jazz.
Up until then, Jazz had avoided looking at his mate, fearing he’d think the worst, but other than curiosity, Wilder didn’t appear upset.
“See,” Iniko said. “It sucks when someone lies to you. Although, it’s probably worse for you since he’s your mate.”
Now Wilder appeared annoyed, but at least his gaze was directed at Iniko and not Jazz. “He didn’t lie to me,” Wilder said, even though he had no clue what any of this was about. That meant the world to Jazz to know his mate refused to believe Jazz would lie to him.
He
hadn’t, but there was no way Wilder could know that.
“We only met yesterday,” Wilder pointed out. “We couldn’t possibly be expected to have shared our entire lives with each other in that short amount of time.” Then he turned back to Jazz. “But I’m hoping you’ll tell me what’s going on.”
That was something Jazz not only could do, but would do for his mate. “Since they haven’t given me anything to go by, I’m assuming they are talking about my computer skills.”
“No shit, Sherlock,” Iniko yelled as he jumped out of his chair, his finger pointed right at Jazz. “You’ve been acting like you have no skills whatsoever, yet I find out this morning, not only do you have a skill, but you’re considered one of the best hackers in the country.”
“I wouldn’t go that far.” Jazz enjoyed trying to see if he could get into a few places that others mentioned were impossible to penetrate. But that didn’t mean he was a true hacker.
“Really?” Alpha Edrick had an eyebrow raised. “Because according to my sources, you were the one to break into Yosi Pandev’s system. That isn’t a minor feat.”
Heat infused Jazz’s cheeks at the mention of his folly. He may have breached Yosi’s system, but it had also nearly given him a heart attack when less than an hour later he’d been shoved in a black van and taken to see the man behind the myth.
Yosi was a shifter who had found a way to build one of the biggest tech conglomerates in the world. He was never seen in public. No pictures of him existed after the one someone obtained in the sixties. It had been black and white, the focus a bit blurry, which only titillated the world’s obsession with the man.
Thank god, Yosi’s only concern was Jazz’s intent when he broke through his firewalls. It didn’t hurt that as soon as Jazz got in, he immediately got back out without trying to access anything. As he’d explained to Yosi, he’d just wanted to know if he could do it, not steal information.
He’d been released, but not until he’d turned down the opportunity to work for Yosi. As much as he loved working with computers, Jazz had known the truth. He wasn’t that good.
“I was just lucky,” Jazz told the room.
Edrick shook his head. “No one is that lucky. Yosi had the most secure system in the world. If you don’t wish to work with computers any longer, we’ll respect that, but I’m not about to sit here and let you downplay your skills.”
“What Edrick is trying to say,” Saber interjected. “Is, we’d like you to come work for the Council.”
Jazz was fairly sure his jaw had dropped to the floor at that announcement. No way had he heard that correctly. Right? “I’m sorry, but… what?”
Wilder’s arm went around him as Jazz’s knees started to give. Then he led them to a chair. Jazz didn’t even think twice when Wilder sat and pulled Jazz onto his lap. He needed his mate’s support at the moment. Not even the knowledge that these people witnessed him sitting on his mate’s lap changed that.
“Your job would be to work with Edrick to set up a secure system for the Council.” Made sense, since Edrick was one of the top computer gurus in the world. Not quite as good as Yosi, but Jazz was fairly sure no one was as good as the porcupine shifter.
“But we’re also hoping you’d agree to go out in the field with your mate.” Saber’s gaze shifted between the two of them. “Assuming Wilder isn’t going to quit.”
Both he and Wilder tensed at that bombshell. Jazz just wasn’t sure which one he was reacting to. For that matter, which one his mate was reacting to. He did know it was the latter that concerned him the most.
Apparently, Wilder felt the same. “How did you know I was going to quit?”
Several around the room chuckled, especially the mated ones. “Dude, come on,” Chadwick said with roll of his eyes. “You’re mated. The last thing you’re going to want is to leave your mate for any period of time.”
It wasn’t as if Jazz could argue that. Even Wilder seemed to relax back into his chair. But that still didn’t answer the other part of the statement. “What could I possibly do in the field?”
“No way,” Wilder said before anyone could respond. “I’m not about to put you in danger.”
Jazz placed a finger over his mate’s lips. “I wasn’t asking you. Now, let them answer.”
There were several more chuckles around the room. It also wasn’t lost on Jazz what he’d just done. Never had he imagined being brave enough to sit on someone’s lap and tell them to remain quite while he had a conversation with their Council Leader. If Jazz didn’t know better, he’d think he was gaining self-confidence.
And damn if it didn’t feel fantastic.
CHAPTER 11
“No. No way. It’s not happening.” Wilder wanted to tear something, or more accurately someone, apart for daring to suggest his mate put himself in harm’s way by traveling with Wilder on his missions. “I am not letting you go, so just forget about it.”
Wilder had never considered himself a put his foot down kind of guy but when it had to do with is mate being in danger? He apparently would. And did.
Sitting through that meeting while his mate got excited that he’d be able to help Wilder do his job, had been sheer torture. Worse than torture, because his mate had actually been on board with the crazy scheme and Wilder had known he’d have to be the one to deny Jazz.
“But…” Jazz dropped his head and stared at the ground. His whole body seemed to curl in on itself as he sank down to sit on the bed. They had returned to their bedroom after the meeting with Jazz chatting happily about finally doing something that would truly help others.
It had killed Wilder to refuse his mate, but he wasn’t about to let Jazz get hurt. He and his grizzly were definitely on the same page about that.
“I could really help and you wouldn’t have to quit something you love.” With each word Jazz’s voice had grown softer, smaller, until even with his advanced shifter hearing, Wilder had trouble making out what his mate was saying. “Is it because you think I can’t do it?”
Shit. Seeing his mate revert back to that unsure man who couldn’t even hold his head up in fear of looking at someone in the eye hadn’t been Wilder’s intention. Gods, he was an ass.
“No, brown eyes.” Wilder knelt down in front of his mate so, even with Jazz’s eyes downcast, Wilder would be able to look into them. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you think I didn’t believe in you. I just…” Letting out a long breath, he reached out and took Jazz’s hands in his own.
He closed his eyes, willing himself to come up with the right words before he caused his mate more self-doubt. “My job isn’t always safe.” Letting out a harsh laugh, he amended that statement. “In fact, it’s usually quite dangerous. When I found Kingston, he first tried to shoot me, then his wolf attacked me, and when I still managed to pin him down and cuff him, he lunged for a knife on the nearby counter and tried to stab me.”
Jazz’s eyes went wide. “Did he hurt you?”
The stupid manly pride within him wanted to scoff at such a question, but the reality was, Kingston may not have hurt him, but there had been plenty of times when he’d been lucky to survive over the years.
“Not Kingston, but that hasn’t always been the case.” He drew Jazz’s hands up to his mouth and kissed first his knuckles, then turned them over and kissed each palm. “I would… I can’t… If anything happened…” Each time he tried to voice his concern about Jazz getting hurt, Wilder got choked up and couldn’t finish. “I wouldn’t survive, knowing you got hurt because I couldn’t protect you. Please, don’t ask this of me.”
Wilder might as well not have said a word with the way his mate still looked completely dejected. It tore his heart to pieces to think he was responsible for that. But how did he take his mate into danger?
A growl in the back of his mind told him his grizzly wasn’t at all on board with that. One the other hand, did he have a choice? This job might help to give his mate a sense of pride. Did he really have the right to deny Jazz that?<
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“It’s fine,” Jazz said. “I get it.” Then he rolled onto the bed and curled up in the fetal position.
As Wilder stood, he could see tears dripping down Jazz’s cheeks. Gods, he was so screwed. The need to comfort the other half of his soul was too much and Wilder crawled into bed and wrapped himself around Jazz.
“If we do this, I’m going to need you to learn to shoot a gun,” Wilder told him, hating himself for even entertaining the stupid idea.
Jazz glanced over his shoulder at him, his watery gaze filled with surprise. “Really? Do you think I’ll be able to shoot a gun?”
Wilder smiled at his mate and kissed the tip of his nose. “There isn’t anything you couldn’t do if you put your mind to it, my mate.”
When Jazz gave him a wobbly smile, Wilder knew there was no way he could ever deny his mate this opportunity. “But you also need to be prepared for it to take time. Don’t expect to pick up a gun and hit the target on the first shot.”
Jazz nodded. “It’s okay. I have to help Alpha Edrick set up the computer system here first anyway.”
Wilder was tempted to sabotage that system in order to keep his mate out of harm’s way. But if he got caught, Jazz would assume Wilder didn’t believe in him and there was no way on this earth that he would let his mate think that.
***
“Okay,” Wilder tried to steady his own nerves as he stood behind Jazz, who now held a 9 millimeter Glock. The only time in his life he’d been this terrified was when Kingston had gone after Jazz the day of the trial.
It had been a week since he’d broken down and agreed to this crazy plan to take Jazz with him on his assignments. Most of Jazz’s time had been spent with Edrick and his team of computer geeks to design the perfect system for the Council. So much for him and Jazz getting a week off to get to know each other better.
