‘You were devastated by what happened to Tom.’
‘I was, but I couldn’t let myself off the hook that easily. Like I said, I’m not ashamed of it, not any more. I got help, a lot of people don’t.’ I reached over and squeezed my sister’s hand. ‘It’s more relief I feel now, if anything. Relief that you were there to help me, relief that I didn’t succeed. Losing Tom that way – I got through it, but I never got over it.’
‘Can I tell you something?’
‘I’m your big sister, you can tell me anything,’ I said.
‘I had a massive crush on your husband. I think he was the real reason I stayed single for so long. I couldn’t find anyone nearly as great as he was.’
I started to laugh. ‘Kate, this is not news to me. I knew you fancied Tom, so did he.’
‘What?’ Kate sat up suddenly. ‘He didn’t, did he?’
I nodded, and Kate put her hand over her face. ‘I’m so embarrassed. I thought I’d done a great job of keeping it hidden.’
‘Nope, I’m afraid not. Tom was flattered, if a little bit uncomfortable at first. He always told me how great he thought you were and how he wished you could find someone nice.’
‘He did? I knew he was one of a kind. I would never have done anything about it though, you know that, right?’
‘Of course I do. I’d have murdered you both in your sleep so no worries there.’ We clinked glasses and drank.
‘He’s a hard act to follow, isn’t he?’ Kate asked.
‘He is.’
‘Where does that leave Daniel Roberts?’
‘What do you mean?’
Kate arched an eyebrow at me in response.
‘What? You knew we’d bumped into each other the other day. And then I bumped into him the other night. The night you told me about your married boyfriend.’
‘When you took yourself off for a walk and ended up in a bar having a drink? You were with him?’
‘You’re making it sound so sordid.’
‘No, I’m not. I think it’s cute, the two of you reconnecting after all this time.’
‘Reconnecting? What the heck are you talking about?’
‘It’s three in the morning, you’ve just got home from a date with a movie star and you’re positively radiating happiness. Something’s happened, you can’t fool me. I’ve known you my whole life.’ She narrowed her eyes, trying to suss me out. ‘You were kissing in that picture I saw.’
I groaned. ‘It was nothing,’ I said. Not like the kiss we’d just shared, I thought. ‘It was just a hello kiss from one old friend to another. That’s all.’
‘Fair enough.’ She looked like she wanted to say more but she didn’t. Instead she said, ‘Ryan says he’s going to leave his wife after Christmas. He doesn’t want to do it before because of the children. He doesn’t want to spoil their Christmas.’
I wasn’t sure what to say to that, so I just murmured a non-committal, ‘Okay,’ and went back to sipping my wine.
‘It would be okay, if he hadn’t said the exact same thing last Christmas.’ Kate’s voice was flat, emotionless.
‘Oh, Kate, why are you putting yourself through it all? You don’t need to settle for being the other woman. The one who gets only the pieces of him that he lets you have.’
‘Because I’d rather have pieces than nothing at all,’ she said. ‘Jesus Christ, I sound so pathetic. This is what he’s done to me, Evie. He’s reduced me to the kind of woman who’ll settle for scraps.’
‘He’s only done that because you’ve allowed him to. You’ve given him permission to treat you like that because, for some unknown reason, you think that’s the best you deserve. And you are so wrong about that.’ I took her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. ‘You’re going to be fine,’ I said. ‘Whatever happens you’ve always got me.’
‘I think I’m going to go to bed,’ she said, ‘and tomorrow we are going out to buy that real Christmas tree we talked about. I’m supposed to be putting in some overtime at work but…’
‘On a Saturday?’
‘It’s a big client, they expect you to work until the job’s done but fuck ’em. They can manage without me for a day. Goodnight, sis.’ She leant down and kissed my cheek and weaved her way over to the stairs. ‘Don’t stay up too late fantasising about your movie star boyfriend.’
‘He’s not my boyfriend,’ I insisted.
‘Then maybe he should be.’
I watched her head up the stairs and then I took the empty wine bottle and glasses over to the kitchen island.
I think he’d be good for you. My husband’s voice made me jump; I almost dropped the glass I was holding. What the fuck? How drunk was I?
Not drunk enough, came the reply. Get on with your life, Evie. It’s time.
‘That’s bloody easy for you to say,’ I whispered to no one.
*
I woke the next morning with a banging headache and a dry mouth. I reached over to the water glass next to my bed, but it was empty. My watch told me it was just after seven. I hadn’t had that much to drink – why did I feel so crappy? Because you’re getting too old to stay out until the early hours and mix wine and champagne, that’s why! My subconscious was rattling its cage. As I dragged myself up off the mattress, I heard my sister moving around in her room. I limped pathetically into her bedroom.
‘Hey,’ I said as I flopped down onto her bed.
‘Hey yourself,’ she grumbled. ‘My head feels like it’s got a hundred little jackhammers going off inside it.’
‘Mine too. What are you doing up so early? I thought you were taking the day off.’
‘I am – force of habit, I suppose.’
‘Since we’re up anyway, shall we go out for breakfast? I want to take you to meet someone.’
‘Is it Daniel Roberts? If it is, I’ll have to do my hair and my make-up,’ she said, hopefully.
‘No, it’s not Daniel Roberts. Although I could probably arrange that if you want.’
She swooned dramatically. ‘Be still my heart.’
‘Behave yourself. No, I want you to meet Judy.’
‘Who the heck is Judy?’
‘My new friend. She works in a diner a few blocks away. I met her on my first morning here. In fact, I think I’ve been in there practically every day. I even worked a shift in there.’
‘You did what?’
‘They were short-staffed, so I offered to help. I didn’t do too badly either, as it happens.’
Kate shook her head in disbelief. ‘You’re crazy, you know that.’
That might not be too far from the truth, I thought as I remembered the voice I’d heard last night. It must have been the wine; there was no other logical explanation.
‘Let’s get dressed, then, shall we? Once this headache goes away, I’m going to be bloody starving,’ I said.
Twenty-One
With both of us nursing sore heads, it took us a little longer to get ready than we’d anticipated. As a result, it was almost nine by the time we made it to the diner. I pulled open the door and the scent of frying bacon and sweet syrup was like a warm hug, welcoming me in and making me feel like everything was going to be okay. I was really going to miss this place when I went back to England. I’d miss Judy and her complete lack of pretence. She was emotionally open and honest in a way that made my buttoned-up English heart soar. I vowed to try and be more like Judy with all the people in my life when I got back home. I’d probably be dismissed as a bloody lunatic, but I didn’t care; life was too short not to be honest. I figured I’d probably have to dial it back a bit for an English audience, but I could make it work.
‘Hey there, honey, come back to wait some more tables?’ Judy came towards us from the back of the restaurant.
‘It looks like you’re managing all right without me,’ I said, gesturing to the two other waitresses serving customers. Judy leaned in towards me.
‘Between you and me, you do a better job than both of ’em, but I guess we have to work wit
h what we have,’ she whispered. ‘Take a seat anywhere and I’ll be right with you.’
Kate and I chose a booth about halfway down the restaurant. She picked up a menu.
‘You won’t find any avocado or green juice on the menu, so don’t bother looking for it. I can recommend their pancakes though. They are divine.’
Kate wrinkled her nose. ‘And a lot of calories, I imagine.’
‘Why are you worried? There’s nothing of you. Live a little, have a bloody pancake.’
‘Fine, I’ll have a pancake.’
‘With bacon,’ I added. Kate rolled her eyes at me. Judy brought some coffee over and filled the two white mugs on the table.
‘Lemme guess, you want a short stack of pancakes and syrup with bacon?’
I clapped my hands with excitement. ‘Ooh, yes, please, and my sister will have the same.’
‘Actually, I only want one pancake and no bacon. Too much salt.’
Judy looked at me and then back at Kate.
‘Joe won’t cook less than three at a time. Says it ain’t worth it. Eat ’em or don’t, it’s all the same to me, honey.’ Judy wandered back towards the kitchen. I couldn’t help smiling but Kate looked shocked. I reached over and patted her hand.
‘It’s fine, she likes you really.’ She started to say something but was interrupted by the sound of her phone ringing in her pocket. She pulled it out.
‘It’s Ryan,’ she said. ‘I’m going to answer it outside.’ She shrugged on her coat and walked away. Through the window I could see her gesticulating wildly, then putting her hand up to her forehead. She was pacing up and down as she spoke, appearing to get more and more angry. Judy came back with our food and we watched my sister pace for a few minutes.
‘Looks like someone’s having a tough time,’ said Judy. ‘Is it a guy?’
I was amazed. ‘Yes, how can you tell?’
She shook her head. ‘Something about a woman’s face when she’s dealing with a guy. I can always tell.’
‘And what’s that telling you?’ We both watched as my sister ended the call and then started to cry.
‘That’s telling me she’s gonna want extra syrup for these pancakes.’
Kate came back into the restaurant, angrily wiping away tears. ‘Bloody men. Utter arseholes, the lot of them.’
‘Amen to that,’ said Judy, returning with a second jug of syrup. Kate picked it up and dumped most of it over the pancakes and bacon she hadn’t wanted. She jabbed her fork into the fluffy pile and shovelled a hefty chunk into her mouth.
‘Oh, God, these are amazing!’ she exclaimed. Judy gave me a ‘see, I told you so’ look and went back to serving customers. I let Kate carry on eating her breakfast for a while before my curiosity got the better of me.
‘What happened?’ I asked.
She leaned back in her seat and wiped syrup off her chin with a napkin.
‘I thought he was calling to apologise for rushing away last night. Turns out he was calling to tell me off for calling in sick to work. Arrogant prick. He didn’t even care that he’d upset me. He just kept telling me to calm down, the same way I’ve heard him do a million times to his wife. You know, maybe you’re right, he’s the one that’s sent her fucking loopy.’ She shovelled more pancake into her mouth and then took a sip of her coffee. ‘Oh, that’s good,’ she said. ‘I’m coming here every day for breakfast. Bugger the calories.’
‘Take it easy there, tiger, no point giving yourself type two diabetes over a man. He’s not worth that.’
‘You’re right. Screw that. I’m not letting him spoil our day. We’re going to find ourselves the biggest and most beautiful Christmas tree either of us has ever seen.’
‘Abso-fucking-lutely,’ I replied.
*
Having stuffed ourselves full of fat and sugar, we were just putting on our coats and getting ready to leave, when Judy came to our table.
‘Did I hear you girls say you were on the lookout for a Christmas tree?’
‘Yep, a big one,’ said Kate, smiling broadly.
‘You need to go see Nate, my baby brother. He’s selling trees on an abandoned lot on Delancey Street. It’s not too far from here. They’re nice, all the way from Canada. I don’t ask how he gets them, best I don’t know, but he’ll do you a good deal. I can call him, tell him you’re coming.’
I looked at Kate; she shrugged. ‘Why not? Beats traipsing all over the place.’
Judy needed no more encouragement than that. She whipped her phone out of her apron and dialled a number. ‘Nate, it’s me. Your sister, ya dumbass, who’d ya think? Listen, I’m sending my friend to see about getting a tree. I told her you’d give her a good one. What? No, now, ya idiot! Jeez! And don’t give her one of those dried up seedlings you try and sucker people into for a hundred bucks a pop. If you screw her over, I’ll know. Right. G’bye.’ She ended the call. ‘He’s an asshole but he’s family. Whatcha gonna do?’
Kate and I waited until we were around the corner from the diner before we looked at each other and fell about laughing. ‘I almost felt sorry for him,’ I said, between giggles.
‘Can you imagine if I spoke to you like that?’
‘You can bloody well try but it won’t get you anywhere,’ I replied. We linked arms and headed for Delancey Street, and Judy’s poor brother.
*
Within an hour, Kate and I were dragging our nine foot balsam fir Christmas tree along the sidewalk to her apartment. I was trying to keep her spirits up, but it had started to snow after we were about ten minutes into our walk home and she hadn’t stopped moaning since.
‘You are in danger of killing my festive spirit,’ I said, after she’d announced for what felt like the hundredth time that she could have ordered a tree online and had it delivered.
‘But that wouldn’t have been anywhere near as much fun,’ I’d replied, the first time she’d brought it up. ‘We got to pick our own tree – that was much more Christmassy.’ In truth, Nate’s muddy abandoned lot hadn’t been that festive, or that jolly. No fairy lights, nor Christmas music. Just handwritten signs on old bits of plywood and a plastic chair for Nate to sit on. Still, we had a tree and we were going to spend the afternoon decorating it. Kate had found a box of Christmas decorations down in the basement of her building in a storage locker owned by the previous tenants of her apartment. Derrick the doorman had told us that we could take them since they’d been there for the last three years and no one had claimed them.
‘When we get back, I’m going to put on some Christmas tunes, make us a hot chocolate and we’re going to get into the festive mood if it bloody well kills us,’ I said. We’d stopped for a rest; dragging a nine foot Christmas tree was hard work. A bin lorry tooted at us as it passed, the men inside applauding our efforts. I waved at them enthusiastically. Kate looked at me like I was nuts.
‘What is it with you? You’re like a different woman these past few days. New hair, waiting on tables in a diner, waving at strangers in the street. And don’t think I haven’t noticed the notebook you keep scribbling in. Are you writing again?’
‘Maybe, I’m just excited to be here and I want to get the most out of this trip. Is that a crime?’
‘No, no crime. I’m pleased to see you coming out of your shell a bit. Just don’t change too much. I liked the old Evie quite a lot – she was nice.’
‘I’m still nice. Now, shut up and start dragging.’
*
After plenty of huffing and puffing, and a bit of swearing, we arrived back at the entrance to Kate’s building. Derrick had obviously seen us coming and rushed to open the door for us. As we dragged the tree into the foyer, I had a horrific realisation. There was no way that our beautifully bushy nine foot fir tree was going to fit into the lift. Thankfully Derrick came to the rescue.
‘It’s no problem. I’ll fetch it up in the goods lift for you. I won’t be picking pine needles out of the carpet in the lift for days that way.’
‘Derrick, you’re a li
fesaver,’ I said. ‘Thank you.’
‘No problem, Mrs Grant. You go on up and I’ll fetch the tree for you.’
I could have kissed him. Kate and I left the tree on the floor in the foyer and headed for the lift. Kate was looking at me funny.
‘What now?’ I asked.
‘What have you done to my ferocious doorman? Derrick is all smiles with you. He doesn’t smile at me like that, and I’ve lived here for three years.’
‘I’m obviously nicer than you – what can I say?’
Kate punched me on the arm. ‘Seriously though, Evie, something’s happened to you since you’ve been here. You’re different somehow.’
‘No, I’m not. A new hairdo doesn’t make you a new person.’
‘It’s more than that. I can’t put my finger on it but something’s changed with you.’ She was staring at me as if she was trying to read my mind.
‘Stop staring, you’re starting to freak me out.’
‘I’ll get to the bottom of it, you mark my words. I’m going to figure it out.’
*
True to his word, Derrick had the tree in the apartment within five minutes. He also brought us a stand to put it in. Having never had a real tree before, Kate and I hadn’t thought about how we were going to get it to stand up in the corner of the living room. Derrick helped us cut a small slice off the bottom of the trunk and he secured the tree in its stand before helping us to move it into just the right spot.
‘It’s one heck of a tree,’ he said as we all stood back to take in its magnificence. Kate was lucky she had such high ceilings, otherwise we’d have had all sorts of trouble.
‘I’ll leave you ladies to it, then. If I find any more decorations, I’ll bring them up. It’s going to take a lot of ’em to cover a tree that size.’
‘Thank you, Derrick, for everything.’
‘Just doing my job, Mrs Grant.’ He gave me a little salute and then he was gone. Kate was back to staring at me again.
‘Hot chocolate, then?’ I said, going into the kitchen. My phone pinged in my bag, telling me I had a message. I pulled it out to read it; it was from Daniel. I couldn’t help smiling at what he’d written.
City of Second Chances Page 23
