She squinted at me. “Business again?”
“I told you, yours makes me happy,” I laughed. “And I can tell it makes you happy. I want to make sure it succeeds.”
She stared at me for a second, then beamed bright, and I think we moved in for a kiss at the same time, meeting in the middle. “You’re so amazing,” she said.
I really wondered how you were supposed to know if you were in love.
∞∞∞
The day came so much sooner than I expected.
“Kayla, you’re going to be just fine. I know you will.” I shifted in my desk chair with the phone to my ear. “I’ll be there soon. Okay? Just wait for me.”
She let out a trembling sigh. “I’m scared. Should I just not go?”
I fiddled with a pen on the desk. Talking to Kayla felt different somehow today, and it wasn’t just knowing the event with Jacob was today. I’d lain awake in bed for a long time last night, something churning in my stomach, and I was only able to relax once I admitted to myself that I did love Kayla.
I figured I’d tell her after the event. Which meant, of course, as the cool and collected CFO of a major international organization, I was freaking out with nerves. Every word Kayla said sparkled like a diamond, and I wanted to gather them all up and keep them forever.
“It’ll be all right, Kayla. I’ll be there. I’ll make sure no one gets too close to you. And you’ll finally get your closure.”
“Okay,” she sighed. “Okay, yeah. Yeah, you’re right. Melissa?”
My heart jumped every time I heard her say my name. “Yeah?”
“You’re the best in the world.”
I felt a smile coming on. “Well, you know, I graduated with honors from Kayla University. That’s got to be worth something.”
She laughed. “You’re ridiculous. Call me when you’re on your way.”
“Yeah. See you soon, Kay.”
“See you soon.”
I hung up, and there was another voice from the office door. “See who soon?” David said, leaning into the room. “Out for a secret rendezvous?”
I squinted. “David, she’s my girlfriend. It’s not that much of a secret. What do you need?”
“Sam and Douglass are coming in. They’re bringing some of their teams. Emergency meeting. You’re going to be there.”
“What?” I squinted at the clock. “David, I’m leaving at three today. I told you that.”
“Out to go on a date with your girlfriend?” he snorted. “Melissa, this is one of the last chances we’ve got to save this company. We’re going to be here all damn day if that’s what it takes.”
“David, I told you weeks in advance,” I said, standing out of my desk. “This is important. This is seriously important. I can’t attend this meeting.”
“Melissa,” he sighed, leaning against the door, “I don’t think you understand. I’m not asking you. I’m telling you. We’re having a meeting, and you’re going to be there. And we’re not going to leave that room until we’ve found a way to save this damn company.”
He turned and left the room before I could say anything, and I had to follow him out into the hall.
“David, I told you, I’m not going. You shouldn’t have scheduled this when you knew I’d leave anyway!”
He whirled back on me with his face twisted in a snarl. “Melissa, I swear to god, you are not going to test my patience like this! Lord knows I’m getting tested enough. You’ve pushed your luck nonstop—”
“Pushed my luck?” I stepped in, backing him up. “By taking off a couple hours a week to be with a loved one?”
“Going running around with this girlfriend you have when the organization is in a tailspin? Yes, you’re pushing your luck! And if you—”
“Why am I held to a higher standard than anyone? John goes home to his wife, you go home to your wife, and I’m expected to have nothing?”
His face was getting redder and redder. “Melissa, given the way things have been going with you at the head, I’m not so sure we even need your position. You get what I’m saying?”
My jaw dropped. “I… no, I don’t get what you’re saying at all. You actually think firing me will be the answer? You really think that’s a good idea?”
“If you can’t even come to the most important meeting we have, then I think it’s pretty clear where your priorities lie.”
“So what you’re saying is, if I don’t come to the meeting, you’re going to fire me,” I said, my voice shaky. “And you don’t think that’s shooting yourself in the foot.”
“Cutting out the weakest link, more like.” He folded his arms. “It’s your call, Melissa. You can leave if you want. Just don’t come back.”
I couldn’t. My head was spinning. I couldn’t. Not after everything I’d put in to get here. Not after everything I’d sacrificed to get out of this rut. I couldn’t just throw it all away.
I stormed back to my office without a word, blistering mad and crushingly depressed all at once, sat down in my chair, and just stared at where my hands were shaking on the desk.
I couldn’t leave. This was it. He’d really gone and screwed up even this.
My hands were shaking as I dialed Kayla’s number, and for the first time in years, I felt tears in the corners of my eyes.
Chapter 20
Kayla
I lit up when Melissa called, taking it and saying, “That was fast,” in my brightest voice.
“Kayla,” she said, her voice trembling, and I got the feeling she wasn’t calling to tell me she was on her way early. “I… I’m so sorry.”
My heart dropped. “Did something happen?”
“I-I can’t… make it,” she breathed, and I felt like I’d just gotten punched in the gut. “I can’t… David wants me for a meeting. And he says if I leave, I’m not welcome back.”
“What?” I squeaked. “Now? Of all possible times? Seriously?”
“I’m… I’m so sorry, Kayla. I promised, and…”
I sank onto my sofa. Leonardo immediately took the opportunity to throw himself at me, but I wasn’t aware of anything else in the world.
Dammit. I hated her boss. I didn’t think I hate ever if I could help myself, but wow, I hated her boss. “I… it’s not your fault…” I mumbled, barely even hearing myself.
“I don’t even know how I can make this up to you,” she said, her voice tight. “You were supposed to be able to see your father, and—”
“I still will,” I heard myself say. “I… I’m going anyway.”
“What? Kayla, you don’t have to force yourself.”
I squeezed my fist in my lap. “I’m Kayla Spencer, and life is sweet. I’m going to figure this out. I don’t need a handsome lady knight in shining pantsuit armor to come rescue me. I… I got this.”
“Kayla… we’re talking about multiple abusers. Physical and emotional abusers. I wouldn’t be able to go back into a place like that myself.”
I took a deep breath. “I’ve got my own skills. I can be tough. Even if you’re not there with me, you’ll still be making me stronger. Because I…”
Love you. I couldn’t say that. Not yet. I’d been hoping to say it after the event, but if she wouldn’t be there…
“Because I’m Kayla Spencer, and life is sweet.”
“God, I swear, Kayla, I’m going to do everything in my power to end this meeting early and get over there, even if I have to barge in halfway through. I swear to god, I’ll do everything I can. I don’t know if it’s anything, but—”
“I’ll be okay.” I wasn’t sure if that was true.
“I know you will! But I want to be there for you! I want to be your girlfriend who shows up at the most important moment to support you! And… I’m going to do what I can to try to make that happen.”
“Thank you,” I whispered. “Thank you, Melissa. I don’t blame you. I don’t blame you for any of this. I just…”
“You just what?”
I sighed. “I hate your boss
.”
She laughed and stopped just as quickly. “Me too, sweetheart. I do, too. I’m glad we have this in common.”
Almost happy. I had no idea why I thought that all of a sudden, but it came into my head out of nowhere and stayed there. Was I the one who was almost happy? Maybe if Jacob’s shadow disappeared from over my life, if I resolved things with my dad? Or was I thinking it was Melissa?
We both had a rough time actually saying goodbye and hanging up, but when I did, I checked my reflection, made sure I looked cute and completely against the grain of the suits and nude tights they were looking for, and I waited for the time to catch a ride.
After three o’clock, I got an Uber, where the driver was a little too chatty, asking about where I was headed. I didn’t think I’m heading to an industry event for grifters to properly say goodbye to my father who publicly disowned me for running away from my abusive boyfriend was good taxi conversation material, although it was kind of funny to imagine saying, so I found a way to talk about the candy shop instead.
I mean, I was pumped up about the shop. Melissa and I had been talking nonstop about a new business strategy. I’d even shared some of it with Shay and Alexa, and things looked good for the business. We were doing great. The only problem was that sitting here in the car trying to talk about everything that got me excited, I just wanted to break down and cry.
I didn’t know why I was doing this. I was just trying to make a point, maybe impress Melissa or something. I couldn’t help the fact that I loved her and I just wanted her to think highly of me, and when my other option was to just sit around and continue to watch my silly little candy business flounder, I couldn’t not do this.
But when I got there, out to the mansion where the event was being held and the driver pulled up along the covered driveway and up to the massive front doors, I was really convinced I’d made a mistake. I was the dumbest person in the world.
I thanked the driver, stepped out of the car, and straightened my back. Point of no return. If I pictured Melissa next to me, I’d be all right.
At least, that’s what I thought until the front door swung open and Jacob stepped out, giving me an incredulous look. My stomach squeezed tightly, like razor wire all around it pulled tight. The sight of him in a suit was so much worse.
“Kayla, are you serious?” he said, looking me over. “What are you wearing?”
I put my hands on my hips, and in my head, I reminded myself. I’m Kayla Spencer, and life is sweet. “I’m wearing my favorite clothes.”
“Look, Kayla,” he said, stepping down off the patio and studying me. “You do realize this is an invitation back. This is an opportunity to be in the inner circle. Kayla, you were personally invited for—”
“I came here,” I said, finding the nerve to cut Jacob off for once in my life, “to talk to my father. That’s all. It has nothing to do with you, Jacob. I’ve moved on and I love someone else.”
He smirked. “She doesn’t seem to be joining you. You sure she’s your girlfriend?”
“Yes,” I said, thrusting my chest out further. Imagining I was Melissa. “It’s fine. I can handle this myself.”
He scrunched up his face, looking me over, and finally, he sighed. “Come in. Your father will be happy to see you again, even if…”
“Even if I learned how to wear color?” I laughed, following him back up to the door. Still, no matter how much I tried to laugh things off, I was in full-blown panic mode, alarms going off in my head, screaming Kayla get out, Kayla out out out. This was a terrible idea.
He opened the door and led me into the most over-the-top foyer I’d ever seen, and the thing that hit me the most was the smell. It was specific but impossible to place, the smell of suits fresh from the dry cleaner, of expensive cologne and more expensive perfume, even the carpet cleaner on the expensive carpet. Just such a specific blend that smelled like every experience I’d had pinned between my father and Jacob, and I froze up.
I couldn’t do this. I could not do this.
“Kayla?” Jacob said, looking back at me. I heard people from the next room, low chatter of a couple dozen people, but I couldn’t process anything. My mind was shutting down. I thought of the way Jacob’s hands felt shoving me backwards. I felt the panic that had coursed through me when I’d hid in the closet, struggling to control my breathing so he couldn’t find me.
But I wasn’t Kayla Barton anymore. I wasn’t Kayla Barton anymore. I was Kayla Spencer, and life was sweet.
“I’m… all right,” I said, taking an unsteady step after him, and then another. “Where’s my father?”
“This way,” he said, gesturing with his head and continuing. The sight of his broad back ahead of me, the one that I’d had to see in the mornings and wonder if those strong muscles would hurt me before I went to bed that night.
But I was fine. I was okay. I was doing this.
At least, I thought that until I got into the next room, where there were seven people seated around a long glass table, all staring at me, and at the end of the table was my father.
That was when I lost it.
He was a big man, even bigger than I remembered. His hair was whiter now, and it had already been far along. His beard was a little longer. But the hard lines on his face were the same as ever, those cold blue eyes that fixed on me as he rose from his seat.
“Mr. Barton,” Jacob said, “she’s here.”
“Kayla,” my father said, and when I heard his voice—deep and raspy, like he was speaking through loose gravel—I felt a hot flush in my head, getting lightheaded. My mind was telling me I had to run, and my body was telling me I couldn’t move. “Kayla, it’s been so long. You don’t know how much I’ve hurt… regretted everything… we treated you unfairly, Kayla.”
He came closer and I scrambled backwards like I was facing a horrible spider or something. He didn’t stop, Jacob walking with him towards me, and my brain screamed for me to get out, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t escape now.
“Wait,” I croaked. “Stop. Stop. Don’t come any closer. I haven’t…”
“Kayla, it’s all right,” my father said, his voice just sending throbs of panic through me. “I’m not going to hurt you, Kayla. You’re my daughter.”
I shook my head. “I’m not a Barton anymore, Mr. Barton. I… I’m Kayla Spencer.”
He stopped. So did Jacob. They both stared at me strangely. I didn’t care how they looked at me, I just wanted them to stop. “Did you get married?” my father said.
“That woman—” Jacob started.
“No,” I said. “No. Not yet. It’s just because… I’m not a part of your… not a part of this family. You disowned me. I’m not a Barton.”
I couldn’t find the words. It was like I was grasping in the darkness, looking for words that slipped out of my reach.
“Kayla, I understand why you left. I should never have done that,” my father said. “But things will be different now. I want to make right all the ways I did you wrong.”
He didn’t mean that. He didn’t mean that. He still wanted to control me, still wanted to hurt me. He just meant I’d get more money. More money that he wanted to go into Jacob’s bank account, once he finished his plan of forcing me to marry Jacob.
“Here, Kayla, come with me,” he said, reaching out and putting a hand on my arm. I wanted to slap it off, knock it away, tell him to get away from me, but I couldn’t…
I couldn’t move.
I couldn’t fight them.
Chapter 21
Melissa
I was about ready to choke out half these bastards.
I was squeezed into a meeting room, my head spinning. Kayla needed me. I knew she did. I knew what she said, and I wanted to believe she’d be okay, but I didn’t think anyone would be okay going into something like what she was going into. I wouldn’t be able to handle anything like it.
These people were just talking. They weren’t actually saying anything. I was squeezed into a meeting room wi
th a bunch of self-congratulatory idiots who thought they’d actually earned the positions they had, repeating the same problems and a few buzzwords, looking at the same graphics that we’d all been looking at for months and acting like it was revolutionary new information.
Meanwhile, Kayla was going through god only knew what. And I was sitting there.
I kept my phone under the table, texting Kayla, waiting for a response but not getting anything after she said she was leaving. I felt like I was going to be sick.
She’d said I was almost happy. I didn’t know what she meant, but I didn’t feel very damn close to happy right now. I couldn’t keep going like this, couldn’t keep abandoning Kayla when she was the most important thing for me. But what was I supposed to do? I was trapped, I was controlled, I didn’t have any power.
David kept glaring at me. I could tell he was as upset I wasn’t contributing to this meeting as I was. But I think we were worried for very different reasons right now. He was worried his company was going to go down in flames, and I was just worried I was about to accidentally lose my temper and punch him in the face.
I needed to keep my thoughts under control. Kayla was an adult. Kayla was an incredible person, and she could handle herself.
She could handle herself no matter how many times I abandoned her.
“Melissa, what do you think?” David said at one point, leaning over the table. “This is your jurisdiction. Can you explain your theories on this?”
I stood up without realizing what I was doing. “Yes. Yes, I can. Just…” I had to look for an excuse for a second. “I’m sorry. I left the documents in my office. I’ll pop out for a bit.”
He rolled his eyes. “Melissa. Please be present on earth with the rest of us. We’re talking about the future of the company.”
“Oh, really?” I raised an eyebrow at him on my way to the door. “I hadn’t heard.”
“Melissa—”
I ignored whatever salient point he had to make, marched out of the room, back to my office, and I sat down at my computer and opened the database.
Life Is Sweet Page 14
