by T L Swan
Our food arrives and we all take a bite of our salad.
“We moved here and I needed a part time job, so I applied at a bar.”
They both frown as they listen and eat.
“Only when I got the job I found out it was Club Exotic.”
Adrian’s face falls.
“What’s that?” Tash asks.
“High class brothel,” Adrian murmurs.
“I… I just work behind the bar,” I stammer. “Nothing more.”
Natasha puts her hand on her chest in relief, and Adrian fake wipes his forehead.
“I make seven-hundred dollars a week for two shifts and Owen doesn’t even know I’ve gone. I start at ten and get home before he wakes up.”
“So, you do this and you work at the hospital?” Adrian frowns.
“Yes.” I take another bite. “Anyway, on my first day at the hospital I had to fill out forms and I didn’t want to be judged for being a single mom.”
“And they would of judged,” Natasha adds.
“Yes, you know what’s its like. I just wanted to be treated equal, you know?”
She nods. “Definitely.”
I frown. “You can imagine my shock when I am introduced to Cameron as the surgeon I’m interning for.”
Adrian shakes his head in disbelief. “What are the chances?”
I throw my hands up in the air. “Beats me.”
Natasha picks up her drink and sips it. “This is an interesting story.”
I smirk. “So then I did something really stupid.”
“What?” Adrian frowns.
“I panicked. I freaked out that I had just lied on all of my forms and said I had no children. That’s when I heard Cameron say to a colleague that he hated kids.”
Natasha frowns. “Cameron loves kids.”
“He said that condoms were the greatest ever invention.”
Adrian rolls his eyes. “He would say that. That’s such a Cameron thing to say.”
I blow out a breath. “And then I made the biggest regret of all time. I pretended I didn’t remember him.”
“Why?” Natasha whispers.
I shrug. “I have no idea. He was gorgeous and happy, and I felt like this loser who he never rang. I wasn’t going to turn up with his child.”
Adrian grabs my hand again.
“How do you say that to a man? Oh, and by the way, I know we haven’t seen each other in five years, but… we have a kid?”
“Shit,” Natasha whispers.
“And then it got worse,” I add. “I was trying to work out how to tell him. He started messaging me and pursuing me and we weren’t allowed to see each other because I’m his intern.”
“Why is that?” Adrian asks.
“Hospital policy,” Natasha interrupts.
“How did you get together?” Adrian frowns.
I roll my eyes. “Honestly, when I say this story out loud it’s cringe worthy. I was at the club and guess who goes there?”
“Who?” Natasha frowns in horror. “Your other boss?”
“Cameron.” Adrian sighs. “I know he goes there.”
Natasha looks at him in horror. “Does fucking Joshua go there?”
He screws up his face. “No, he likes his balls too much for that.”
She smirks and holds up her knife and pretends to cut them off.
I continue. “Cameron turns up at the place, sees me, loses his shit and then demands a lap dance.”
“Nooo,” Natasha whispers. “Get the fuck out of here.”
Adrian’s eyes widen in horror. “This really is an interesting story,” he whispers. “What did you do?”
I slap my hands over my face. “I gave him one.”
“What?”
I nod.
“Oh my fuck,” Natasha whispers.
“I’ve never done anything like that in my life, and then Jenna had to go home because her mom was sick and Owen went to my mom’s for twelve days so I could keep working.”
“Okay.” Natasha frowns as she listens.
“My next shift at the club, Cameron turns up and the chemistry between us is ridiculous. We make out and he rushes me out of the club, back to his house, and we have crazy stupid sex all night.”
They both sit wide-eyed as they listen to the story.
“So I keep thinking to myself, I will tell him in the morning, but he springs it on me that he’s taking me to New York for the weekend because he wants his weekend that he missed out on five years ago.”
Natasha smiles and elbows Adrian. “That’s kind of romantic. You have to admit.”
I shake my head. “So I make an internal decision to spend the weekend with him and tell him when we get back. Only thing is, he’s crazy sweet all weekend and he takes me to the library and shows me the advertisement that he put in the classifieds five years ago when he was trying to find me.”
Adrian raises his eyebrows as he sips his drink. “Now that’s romantic.” He nods.
I blow out a breath. “Every day it got harder to tell him, and every day I was panicking because we just...” I pause as I think of the wording.
“You fell in love,” Adrian finishes for me.
My eyes rise to meet his. “I did.”
“He did, too. He told me he was in love with you.”
I frown. “When?”
“On the Monday after we got back for San Fran. His exact words were I’m in love with this girl.”
I put my head into my hands as the sadness takes over.
They both sit in silence as they watch me. “What happened then?” Natasha finally asks.
“I told him I had a son and he threw the biggest tantrum you have ever seen. He smashed a glass up against the wall and left before I could even tell him that the child was his.”
“Bloody hell.” Adrian sighs. “This is a mess.”
“And then he somehow found out and came around the house the next night losing his ever-living shit.”
“Margaret told him,” Natasha whispers.
My eyes snap to her. “Oh no, how did she know?” I gasp.
“Look at him.” Natasha shakes her head. “He’s the image of Cameron.”
I blow out a deflated breath and shake my head. “Last night I begged for my job back.”
“Hang on, when did you leave?”
“Cameron made me leave last week, so I did.”
Adrian frowns.
“But the reality is that I need the money. I’m supporting three people. So I went back last night and guess who was there?”
Natasha narrows her eyes. “That fucking snake.”
“My thoughts exactly. Only, I was tipsy because I was drinking and I was so mad that he was there for other women… I did something really stupid.”
“What?” They both gasp.
“I did a lap dance for him again and then he went crazy and dragged me outside. When I wouldn’t get in his car, he punched the windshield of his Aston Martin and smashed it and broke his hand.”
Adrian’s eyes nearly pop out in horror. “His hand is broken?” He gasps.
I nod. “And I have just spent the morning with him screaming and threatening me if I don’t give up my second job there will be hell to pay. He’s made all kinds of demands about Owen.”
Adrian puts his head in his hands and Natasha shakes her head in disbelief.
“I have no words,” Adrian whispers.
“I do,” Natasha replies. “Holy fucking shit.”
I put my head into my hands in despair and Adrian rubs my back. “He’s just coming to terms with it.”
“Joshua and Cameron have an issue with paternity situations,” Natasha replies, her and Adrian exchanging looks. “This is a huge trigger for them and I’m sure it will get better.”
I sip my drink sadly as I contemplate my weekend.
“He’s coming around to see Owen tomorrow.”
Adrian and Tash smile at each other and then at me. “Good luck. You’re going to need it.”
&
nbsp; * * *
I watch the Aston Martin pull into the driveway.
He’s here.
“Owen?” I call. “You have a visitor.”
21
Cameron
I turn the engine off and look up at the house. God, this is my worst nightmare.
How do you tell a kid that you’re his father when you don’t believe it yourself?
I know it’s true, I have the proof, and yet somehow, I feel like I’m in a bad dream and any minute Ashley is going to laugh and tell me it’s all a joke. Then I can go back to having her in my arms and being happy.
I can stop resenting her so much.
I don’t want to resent her… but I can’t help it. How could she have hidden this from me?
I take out my phone and scroll through it, hoping to find an urgent message from the hospital saying I’m needed—that I have to be somewhere. I want to be anywhere but here. I grip the steering wheel in my hands as I imagine how this is going to go. How would I have felt if some stranger turned up and announced that he was my father? What would I have thought of him?
Poor kid. What a fucked up start to his life.
Right, that’s it. I need to make this right.
With renewed determination, I climb out of the car and head to the door and knock. I glance up the street as a man starts to mow his lawn and I look around. At least this is a nice neighborhood they’re living in.
The door opens in a rush and Ashley stands before me. Her hair is in a high ponytail and she has no makeup on. My heart somersaults in my chest. She’s so fucking beautiful.
“Hey,” I push out.
She smiles and it kicks me right in the gut. “Hi, Cam. Thanks for coming. Please come in.”
God, she smells good.
I follow her into the house and glance around. It seems so strange being here without her on my mind. When I was here before, I was so focused on her I don’t remember much about the house. It’s homey, nice and clean, and I know she said she moved with bare essentials and put the rest of her stuff in storage back in New York. She walks into the kitchen and I follow her, unsure what to do.
“Would you like a cup of coffee?” she asks.
“Please.” I frown as I take a seat on a stool at the kitchen counter.
She fusses about and I sit silently, uncomfortable. I feel myself begin to perspire.
She turns and hands me my coffee. “Do you still want to tell him today?”
“Yes.” I sip my coffee. “I’m not starting our relationship with lies.”
Her eyes hold mine. “Like we did, you mean?”
I raise my eyebrow and sip my coffee. “No comment,” I murmur.
She blows out a breath. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be snarky and I know you are doing the best you can.”
I purse my lips as I watch a small spot on the kitchen counter. I need to focus on anything but looking in her eyes.
She reaches out and puts her hand on my forearm. “I’ve had five years to adjust to this situation, Cam and you haven’t. It’s a lot to process. It will get easier, I promise.”
I nod. “I hope so.”
She smiles awkwardly and shrugs. “I thought maybe we could tell him and then, if you want some privacy, I could go out for a couple of hours and leave you two here alone?”
I frown and nod. I feel my nerves flutter.
Don’t leave me alone with him.
“Okay,” I mumble, distracted.
“What are you going to say?”
“When?”
“When you tell him?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. I’ve run though every possible scenario in my head all night. I think I’m just going to blurt out with it.”
“He’s very in tune, Cameron, and he’s really intelligent. If he picks up on the fact that you’re sad about it, he will latch onto that.”
My eyes rise to meet hers. “Do you think I’m sad about this?”
She shrugs. “You’re acting like you are.”
I frown. “I’m not sad I have a child with you. I’m upset with the way it happened, that I’ve missed out on so much. I’m furious that I found out from my mother and not you. You have no idea how that made me feel.”
She closes her eyes in regret. “I’m so sorry the way things transpired, Cameron, and I know you don’t believe me, but I can’t regret the week I spent with you. We would never have gotten to have that if you’d known earlier. You would have dismissed me as the psycho who turned up here with your kid in a heartbeat.”
Her eyes search mine and I don’t know what to think… or how to feel?
Blinding betrayal is all that comes through.
I drop my head. I don’t want to have this conversation. I can’t deal with it.
“Can you get him, please?” I ask.
Her eyes hold mine for an extended moment. I know she wants to finish this conversation, but I can’t.
I can’t go there. “Please?” I urge.
“Sure.” She walks out of the kitchen and calls upstairs. “Owen, you have a visitor.”
“Who?” he calls and I hear him run up the hall before he comes bouncing down the stairs. “Who is it?” he asks as he follows her into the kitchen.
“Cameron.” She smiles calmly.
Fuck… I wish I felt calm.
His face falls, and then he forces a smile when he sees me.
“Hello, mate.” I smile.
“Hi,” he replies.
“We’re having coffee. Would you like me to make you a hot chocolate?” Ashley asks him.
“Okay.” He smiles.
I pull out a stool next to me. “Why don’t you sit here?” I tap the stool.
He climbs up and sits at the counter.
His dark hair is unruly and curly like mine. He has the same olive skin and the cheekiest smile I have ever seen. He brings a smile to my face.
“What have you been up to?” I ask.
“You sound funny.” He smirks.
“Owen, use your manners, please.” Ashley frowns.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“Your voice is different.”
I smile. “That’s my accent. I’m Australian.”
He frowns as he thinks.
“Can you say Australia?” I ask.
“Australia,” he repeats as clear as day. “What is it?” he asks.
“It’s a country, my home.” I smile.
Owen frowns and his curious eyes rise to Ashley.
“You know, Owen, kangaroos come from Australia,” Ashley tells him.
“Oh.” He thinks for a moment. “Do you have a kangaroo?”
I smile. “No.”
Ashley hands him his hot chocolate. “Thank you.” He smiles as he takes it from the counter.
Ashley pulls a stool around to the other side and takes a seat. I inhale.
Just do it.
“So… Owen.” I pause. Fuck. “I… I wanted to talk to you today.”
He sips his chocolate and watches me intently.
“It seems that…” I frown. Fuck, this is hard. “It seems that when you were born, there was a bit of a mix up.”
Owen frowns.
I glance at Ashley and she looks to have turned a pale shade of green.
“Yeah,” I continue. “There was a mix up and we only just found out about it.”
He sips his chocolate as he listens.
“You see, I’m your dad, Owen.”
He frowns and I can see the information swirling around in his little head. “But I already have a dad,” he says.
“I know. You have two dads.”
He frowns and looks over to Ashley, and then back to me. “My other dad’s just busy, that’s all. He’s coming back.”
Ashley’s eyes fill with tears and she bites her bottom lip.
“I know.” I smile sadly. “But I thought maybe you and I could hang out a bit?”
He frowns.
“Would that be alright?” I ask.
“
But how did that happen?” he asks.
“Well.” I pause. Fuck, what do I say here? “Erm.” Fucking hell. “So, your mom had an egg.” I poke his little chest. “Which was you and I had the seed and together we made a little baby.”
He frowns as he thinks. “How did the egg get the seed?”
I glance up and see Ashley is smirking.
“I…” I shake my head as I try to think of an answer. “When I kissed her. I gave her the seed when I kissed her.”
His face falls in disgust. “You kissed my mom?”
I nod. “She’s very pretty and I couldn’t help myself.” I glance up and Ashley is close to tears again. “And she spoke French,” I whisper with a smirk as I rub the top of his head. “Do you know any French, Owen?” I ask.
He shakes his head and thinks for a moment. “I know French fries.”
I smile broadly and Ashley laughs.
“Yes, like that, Owie.” Ashley smiles. “Just like French fries.”
He drinks his hot chocolate and thinks on it for a moment.
“I thought today you could show me around here, because Mom’s got some things to do. Is that okay?” I ask.
He frowns and his eyes flicker to Ashley.
She smiles softly. “Cameron is my friend, Owen. He’s a lovely man. You’re going to have so much fun together. You’re very lucky that you get to have him for a daddy.”
I get a lump in my throat and Ashley must be able to sense it because she grabs my hand on the counter and I find myself squeezing it as a silent thank you.
“Okay.” He shrugs.
I frown. “Okay?” I ask, surprised. Surely it’s not going to be that easy…
“Wait, what do I call you?” Owen asks.
I smile softly. “Dad. You call me Dad.”
* * *
I sit on the lounge room floor and watch Owen play with his Lego. It’s freaking me out watching a little version of myself making sense of the world.
I’ve been watching him for two hours. I could watch him all day. “Do you want to go for a bike ride?” I ask.
“I don’t have a bike.”
I frown. “You don’t have a bike?”
“No, because it’s dangerous on the roads.”
“Oh,” I reply.
“Shall we go for a skateboard?”
“What’s a skateboard?”
Oh God, it gets worse.
