by T L Swan
Pain crosses my face. I need to get away from him right now. I can’t take this hurt any longer.
My eyes hold his. “Believe this, Cameron,” I whisper. “I will never forgive you as long as I live.”
I turn and walk out the door with my broken heart shattered deep in my chest.
“All rise,” the clerk calls.
As we all stand, I feel like I’m having an out of body experience.
I’m in a small courtroom in LA. Cameron stands on the other side of the room.
We’re both alone. This is a closed hearing and neither of us have legal representation. The big case is in a month and I will be prepared for that one.
I’m not giving up without a fight. But if I do lose, I will run.
I will not lose my son.
The only people here are two secretaries and a security guard.
I glance over as we wait for the judge to arrive, and Cameron’s eyes are fixed firmly on the floor. He can’t even bring himself to look at me.
He feels guilty, and so he should. This is a cowardly act if ever I saw one.
I bring up his child and this is how he repays me.
The door opens, the judge comes into view, and the floor sways beneath me. I know that face.
It’s the man from the club.
Judy.
I frown. That’s why they call him Judy. Judge Judy.
He’s a judge.
My angry eyes flash to Cameron and he drops his head even lower and blows out a deep breath. He knows that he goes to the club. He knows that I hate him.
I’m going to lose.
My heart starts to race.
Tears instantly fill my eyes as I contemplate what’s about to happen.
The judge sits down and reads the papers and then glances up and does a double take when he sees me. His eyes travel over to Cameron and he frowns.
He knows that Cameron spent the night with me in the Escape Lounge. Hell, he even bid against him for the honor.
I close my eyes as I sit quietly while he reads the papers in front of him.
“What’s going on here?” he finally asks.
We both stay silent.
“Mr. Stanton, address the court,” he orders.
Cameron stands. “I’m applying for temporary custody of my son, your Honor.”
“Why?”
“Read the paperwork,” Cameron replies, his hatred for this man shining through.
“I have and I want to hear it from you. Need I remind you that you’re in my courtroom?”
This man is so rude.
Cameron pauses and his eyes find mine. “I feel that his mother is going through a hard time at the moment and that it is in the best interests of the child if he stays with me for a while. It’s temporary,” he adds.
“I see.” The judge watches him carefully and then his eyes travel to me.
“You took an overdose this week, Ashley?”
“I was drugged, your Honor,” I reply. “I didn’t knowingly take drugs. I would never do that.”
His eyes assess me for a moment.
“You are involved in prostitution?” As if he doesn’t know… snake.
You screw girls there every night behind your family’s back.
“No,” I reply flatly. “I work at the bar in a club that has prostitutes working in another area of the club. It’s by association that I have been accused of this,” I answer firmly.
He raises an eyebrow in question. I would dearly love for it to go on the record that he is a client if he wants me to elaborate.
A fucking aggressive, sleazebag of a client.
He inhales deeply as he flicks through the paperwork. “What do you request of the court, Mr. Stanton?”
“Temporary custody until I am reassured of Miss Tucker’s state of mind,” Cameron answers.
“There is nothing wrong with my mind,” I hiss.
The judge peers over his glasses at me. “You’re a medical student, Ashley?”
“I am.”
“Do you know the consequences of your future if you are charged with prostitution?”
I drop my eyes to the floor in shame. “I do.”
“Your Honor, I have offered Ashley financial support so she can stop working at the bar, but she has, so far, refused,” Cameron interrupts.
The judge’s beady eyes peer up over those glasses again. “Is that true, Miss Tucker?”
I pause for a moment. “Yes, your Honor.”
He frowns and flicks through the paperwork again and then rests his eyes up on us both intermittently.
“In light of this week’s events with Miss Tucker overdosing, I feel I have no choice but to grant twenty-eight days temporary custody to Mr. Stanton in the interest of the child’s safety. Ashley, you are to attend drug counseling before the next court hearing.”
I frown.
He bangs the gavel. “Court adjourned.” Judy snaps his folder and stands to leave the room.
I swallow the lump in my throat and concentrate on the carpet in front of me.
No.
No.
No.
This can’t be happening.
I feel Cameron’s hand on my shoulder. He squeezes it as an offer of sympathy.
I brush it off and stand defiantly. “Don’t you ever touch me,” I whisper. “I hate you.”
Cameron
I sit at the kitchen counter, thinking about today’s court case. Ashley was beyond devastated and, even though I know I should be happy I won, that I can guarantee Owen’s safety…
I feel like shit.
The front door opens in a rush and I hear Natasha’s and Adrian’s voices. I instantly roll my eyes.
Here we go.
Stan is with me already. He came here straight from work after the court case at midday. He knows how low I am.
Natasha comes into view and her face falls when she sees me. “Is it true?” she asks, her voice filled with horror.
I stare at her as Joshua walks into the room behind her. He kisses her on the cheek, but her attention stays firmly fixed on me.
“Answer me, Cameron,” she snaps.
“Tell me you didn’t go through with it,” Murph begs.
I drop my head in shame.
“What the fuck, Cameron?” Natasha yells. “What the hell do you think you are doing?”
“He’s protecting his child,” Joshua interjects.
“He doesn’t need to!” she yells. “Ashley is a fantastic mother.”
“She’s forgetting to pick him up. She’s working in a strip club one minute and overdosing the next. What am I supposed to do?” I reply in my defence.
“You are supposed to support her.”
“You never forget your kids.”
Her eyes widen in disbelief. She’s looking at me like I’m stupid. “I have three nannies, Cameron. I have security around the clock and I have never paid a damn bill since I’ve been with your brother.”
Joshua and I stay silent.
“Have you two honestly lost your minds?”
I drop my head.
“She’s doing the best that she can. She works in that damn strip club to pay for Owen’s food, and I can tell you right now, if I had no money and no support, I wouldn’t think twice about any job that provided stability for my kids.”
“You wouldn’t work there,” Joshua grumbles.
Natasha turns on him like a crazy person. “I would sleep with the fucking devil to give my kids a home, and you should know that every decent mother on the planet would do the same,” she yells as she slams her hand down on the counter. “Have you two deviated so far from reality with your privileged life that you have lost all compassion?”
“Obviously, they have,” Murph mutters under his breath.
“Shut up, Murph,” I say firmly.
“No, I won’t. This is fucking ridiculous, Cameron,” he snaps. “I can’t believe you are going through with it.”
“What am I supposed to do?” I yell. “
You tell me what I’m supposed to do when I know for a fact that Ashley is driving around with Owen in the car, surviving on only two hours sleep, twice a week.”
They all stay silent.
“If he gets killed in a car accident from her falling asleep behind the wheel and I knew that I could have stopped it... I could never live with myself,” I cry.
Natasha drops her head to her hands. “Cam,” she whispers.
“I don’t know how to stop her working there. I don’t have any choice,” I reply sadly. “This is out of my control. I didn’t want to do this.”
“You are doing the right thing, Cam.” Joshua sighs sadly.
Natasha screws up her face. “Would you turn on me like this?” she asks Joshua in disgust.
“If I knew you for one week and you had lied to me the whole time and you tried this shit on with my child… Fucking truth, I would.” He growls.
“Then you’re an asshole, too,” she screams. “That’s it, I’m leaving.” She storms toward the front door. “Adrian?” she calls out.
Joshua rolls his eyes, knowing he’s now in the shit, too.
“Coming,” Adrian calls back. “Cam, I’m telling you now, if you do this, Ashley is gone for good. You can kiss her goodbye. She will never forgive you.” With one last lingering look, he disappears after Natasha and the front door slams behind them both.
Fear rises in my chest.
The house falls silent and I am left alone with my brother, each of us lost, deep in thought.
“I have to do this,” I murmur sadly.
He puts his hand on my shoulder. “I know you do, mate. I would do the same.”
Ashley
It’s just turning six in the evening—the time Cameron said he is coming to get Owen. The guards are out the front, surrounding the house.
The house is silent and sad.
I pack the last of the things in Owen’s suitcase as I try to pretend I’m happy that he’s going on a holiday.
Jenna is in her room crying. We’ve both been distraught all day.
She can’t even face Owen.
I need to be the bigger person and not let my son be scared by what’s happening.
He’s only a baby.
“Where’s my cap?” Owen asks.
“I already put it into your suitcase,” I whisper. I take his favorite ten books and put them into the suitcase on top of his clothes.
“Will you come and get me tomorrow?” Owen asks. “I don’t think I want to sleep there, either. Can you sleep over, too?”
I swallow the lump in my throat. “No, baby. Mommy can’t come.”
He thinks for a moment. “But where will I sleep.”
Tears fill my eyes. “You will sleep with Daddy.”
“But he might not let me sleep with him.” He frowns, concerned.
“He will.” I smile. “He told me that it’s okay,” I assure him as I keep packing.
Owen frowns. “I’m not going to go. I want to stay here with you.”
“You need to go, baby. It’s going to be so much fun,” I whisper.
I see the black Audi pull up and I wince as I try to hide my emotions.
Oh my God. I can’t do this.
I close my eyes as I try to gain the strength that I need to get through this. I want to scream and fight and cry and beg him not to take him, but I know that’s only going to upset Owen. I can’t do that to my little man.
Cameron sits in the car and I slowly seal the suitcase shut. “Dad’s here,” I whisper.
Owen jumps off the bed and peers out the window, smiling brightly.
“Dad!” he calls, and he takes off out of the bedroom, runs downstairs, out the front and up to the car. Cameron gets out and picks Owen up to hold him in his arms.
I watch from the upstairs window as the tears stream down my face.
Cameron glances up and sees me. His face falls and he drops his head to kiss Owen’s temple.
I wheel the suitcase downstairs and out onto the porch. I can’t help it now. The tears won’t stop.
Owen runs up to me, and his face falls when he sees my distress. “What’s wrong, Momma?” He frowns.
“I’m just going to miss you, baby.” I smile as I bend and take him in my arms.
I hold him tight to my chest as I scrunch up my face from the pain. Cameron watches on in silence.
I fake a smile. “You be a good boy for daddy.” I straighten his shirt and his pants.
I turn to Cameron. “He needs to sleep with you… In your bed,” I whisper. “He gets scared on his own.”
Cameron’s haunted eyes hold mine.
“Promise me he can sleep with you,” I push out through my tears.
Cameron nods. “I promise,” he whispers.
I squeeze Owen and hold him tight until, finally, I know I have to let him go.
“Go with Daddy, baby,” I whisper.
I grab him once more. This is unbearable.
Cameron takes the suitcase from me and I bite my bottom lip to stop myself from sobbing loudly. He takes Owen’s hand and leads him out to the car.
I watch on as my heart hurts and the tears run down my face.
He opens the car and lifts Owen into the seat and straps him in. I feel like I’ve just been shot. I start to cry, hard and uncontrolled, and I know I need to get inside before Owen sees me. I stagger back and make it through the door only to fall into the fetal position on the sofa where I let myself sob.
No, no, no. This can’t be happening. He took him.
He took my baby.
I cry out as the pain becomes unbearable. “No,” I cry as I shake my head violently. “No, no, no.”
I feel Jenna’s hands on my shaking shoulders. “It’s okay, Ash. It’s going to be okay, baby. We’ll get him back. I promise you, we will get him back.”
The screen door bangs and we both look up to see Cameron standing in the foyer.
“Change of plans,” he whispers through haunted eyes. “Owen will stay here now. I’ll come and get him at the weekend.”
My face falls.
Cameron clenches his hands at his sides, unsure what to say next. Without further word, he turns and leaves, just as Owen comes in the front door.
I stare at Owen for a moment, completely in shock. What just happened?
I smile awkwardly through my tears. “Baby, you’re back already?” I run and scoop him up into my arms and sob with relief.
Thank heavens.
25
Ashley
They say that time heals all wounds.
They lied.
It’s been six weeks since Cameron tried to take my son from me.
It’s been six weeks since I lost all faith in humanity.
I resigned from my internship, and Dr. Jameson stepped in and offered me a placement with him. He knows the full, sordid story.
I hardly see Cameron at work now. We are civil and share custody with Owen. Cameron dropped the court proceedings, but I still have to attend drug counselling once a week from the court orders.
Owen is blossoming before my eyes and he loves his father with all of his heart.
Cameron is good for him. I have no doubt in my mind about that.
Whereas once before I was jealous and nervous around Cameron… now I only have contempt for him.
The gentle, funny man I was in love with has been replaced by the power hungry millionaire he’s shown me to be.
The Stanton family is a tight circle. If you’re on the inside, they’re loyal to each other to the death. But they’re a nightmare if they declare war against you.
Sadly, money wins all battles.
I’m scared for my son—scared for the man he is going to turn into.
He will be one of them, I can already see it. Cameron changed his name legally to Stanton a month ago and he added his name as Owen’s father on his birth certificate.
He is now Owen Stanton with a hefty trust fund and a rich daddy.
I say that like I despise i
t, and I don’t. I don’t mean to be negative. All those years when I didn’t know who Owen’s father was, I just dreamed of a man who would protect him with all of his heart—who would love him as much as I do.
And he does. Cameron loves Owen. It’s undeniable. The bond they share is natural and strong. It’s everything I ever hoped for.
Natasha has been wonderful and I’ve seen her at least once a week since everything happened. We seem to have formed a friendship out of all of this.
She understands my point of view, but she also understands Cameron’s. I get it, I really do. All hell broke loose when she found out what Cameron had done. I can’t help but wish that she could have talked sense into Cameron before he ruined everything between us.
Part of me is grateful that I know Cameron will fight for what he thinks is best for Owen.
My life has become easier. I don’t work at the club anymore. I have three days where I’m childless every week. I joined a gym and I’m reading books for fun again.
I should be happy. My rent is paid. My son is content.
But I feel like an empty vessel—like my heart has been ripped out and put into the blender on high speed.
I don’t want to feel like this anymore. I don’t want to hate him. I just want to stop hurting over what he did.
I need to get over it. It’s all in the past.
Just like my love for him.
It’s midnight and I am sitting up alone watching a rerun of Friends. Joey can always make me laugh, no matter what.
Jenna has started quite the love affair with her new friend, and she stays over there more times than she stays with me now. I’m happy for her. She deserves someone nice, and he is beautiful.
I check my phone and blow out a deflated breath.
No messages.
I stand up, turn the television off, and head up to bed.
Tomorrow I will feel better. I know I will. Mornings always seem so much brighter.
Sadly, I know that at this time tomorrow night I will feel exactly the same as I do now.
Empty and alone.
Cameron
The phone rings in the middle of the night and I get up to answer it. I knew this call was coming.
“Hello.” I sigh.
“Hello, Dr. Stanton. This is Maria.”
