by Katy Evans
“You remember my father, Alistair Walker?” I quickly say.
She nods briefly to my father.
“Morning, Mr. Walker,” she says. She’s met him a few times before at work functions. Dad looks back and forth between the two of us with a questioning expression.
“Morning, India. Is there a reason you’re here so early on a Saturday morning?”
“I was just leaving,” India says curtly. She’s not the kind to make excuses, so my father’s imagination is likely running wild.
“Well, no hurry, my dear! I just came to check in on my son and Rosie. Have they both been good?”
India cocks her head to the side. “Funnily enough, I’d say your son is more childish than the baby. I’m sure you know that already, though.”
Dad laughs loudly, clapping a hand on my back. “Son, I like this young lady. Though she doesn’t seem to like you, clearly.” He looks back at India. “See, my son needs a good woman to keep him on his toes. Keep his perspective in check, you know?”
India nods, her expression blank. “Sure. I’ll be sure to give out his number if I ever meet one keen enough to take him on.”
I can’t help being angry at the pair of them, teasing me as though I’m not here. It makes me feel three inches tall. I want to snap back, tell my father what India is really bitter about, but I keep my mouth shut. Shoving my hands angrily into my slack pockets.
“Well, India, I guess you’re right and he could use a little help in finding a woman like that. You’re his assistant, right? Why not assist in setting him up? Do you know anyone who he might click with?”
“Not really. But does your son even know what it is that he wants?”
Another dig. I wish she’d leave already, but I have a feeling my father isn’t going to let this one go. He’s enjoying himself far too much to give up now.
“Well, let’s be honest, at this point he’ll have any woman who’ll take him, eh, son?” he jests, nudging me in the ribs. India cracks a smug smile.
“Well... I guess I do know someone I could convince to go on a date. She’s single, pretty, well mannered, career-driven... And she has the patience of a saint. She’s going to need it.”
Dad claps his hands together. “Excellent! Give me her info and we’ll set something up for later this week. I can babysit while he heads out on his date. William will take your friend out to a lovely restaurant. When is your last day, India? Next Friday? Maybe that would be the perfect night for a date to take his mind off his losses.”
India glances at me, her eyes still blazing with a little anger. “I’m sure that can be arranged.”
“That’s enough, both of—”
“Nonsense, son. Lighten up. We’re just having a bit of fun. Still, you have to admit you need to put yourself out there more.”
“Dad—”
Before I can argue further, there’s more commotion at the front door. This time it’s Henry, who lets himself in with his spare key.
“The car’s ready now,” he says politely, unaware of the strange conversation he’s interrupted. “I’d be happy to take Ms. Crowley home.”
“Thank you, Henry,” I say, glancing at her. India looks back at me, unsuccessful at hiding another blush as our eyes meet, despite the fact that she obviously hates me. “See you on Monday, Mr. Walker.”
The pair leave together in silence. The moment the door closes behind them, Dad chuckles to himself.
“Well, son. Things were a little frosty just then, wouldn’t you say?”
I shake my head at him. “I can’t believe you.”
“Oh, please. Can’t you take a joke? Besides, maybe you do need to go out on a blind date to loosen up.”
I throw my hands up in exasperation.
“What? Maybe you’ve already got someone else in mind?” Dad says with faux curiosity. I can tell he sees right through me.
“Dad—”
“I thought so. Your problem is that you sit around and wait until it’s too late. You need to put in the work. Flirt a little.”
“And you’re seriously encouraging me to go for it with my assistant?”
“Look, you know I’m not the kind of man who cares about that. I gave Alex and Kit my blessing, didn’t I?”
“Yes, but after you gave them hell first.”
“Oh, blast that. And aren’t they happy now, after taking so many risks to be together?”
“Well, yes, but—”
“Stop making excuses for yourself, William. Just let it happen. Go with the flow for once, for Christ’s sake. You never know—you might actually have something worth fighting for here.” He nudges me gently. “Besides, doesn’t she leave her position in a week? After that she’s fair game.”
He could be right. He usually is. But will she ever forgive me for the way I left her alone last night?
Have I screwed this up entirely, or will I get another chance?
One thing I know about India is that she’s got walls up even higher than mine.
Fifteen
India
One more week. Just one more week. That’s how much longer I have to spend with the insufferable William Walker. Then I’ll be able to walk out and never see him again, with a healthy sum of money in my back pocket.
So why does the prospect of leaving disappoint me so much?
After the way he humiliated me, it’s almost unbearable to think about going back to his house. Yet here I am, preparing to head for work, back to the scene of the crime. And a part of me is actually desperate to get back there. Why? I have no clue. Maybe some sick part of me is hoping he might have changed his mind again. He clearly flits from decision to decision the way his brother used to flit from woman to woman. He doesn’t know his own mind. But I can’t be the one to teach him how to think for himself. It’s too big of a task to take on over the space of a week, and by then I’ll be gone.
I just have to accept that the whole thing between us was a massive mistake. No matter how much he begs or tries to persuade me otherwise, I have to make sure that this is the end. Because I’m the one who gets hurt each time we get closer. If only to protect myself, I have to keep my distance from William.
I’m an only child who never really felt like I lived up to my parents’ expectations of me. A close family like the one William has is something I’ve always craved. Yes. Seeing him with his niece sort of melts my heart. And yes, talking to him and seeing this whole other side to him has an effect too.
But his rejection stung in more ways than one. It made me feel, once again, as if I’m not good enough. I hate feeling like this. Especially when a part of me just wants him to think well of me because I’ve started to think more than well of him.
I go to the kitchen to make some breakfast. It’s still super early, but to my surprise Montana is waiting for me in the kitchen. I try for a smile, though I feel like breaking down in tears. Montana isn’t convinced by my attempts at all.
“Morning,” I say quietly, avoiding her gaze. She folds her arms.
“Are you going to tell me what happened on Saturday? Or are you just going to keep pretending like everything is fine?”
I shake my head as I open the fridge. “There’s nothing to say.” I can’t imagine telling Montana about this one. What would I say? That I did a striptease for my boss and then got upset when he didn’t take an interest.
Pathetic. I’m truly pathetic.
But Montana isn’t one to give up. “You don’t owe that man anything, Indy. You could walk away right now. Forget the money—it’s not important. If you think working there for another week is going to make you this miserable, you should quit while you’re ahead.”
“I’m fine.”
“You’re not. I know you better than anyone. I can see when you’re upset. I can tell that he did something to upset you.”
&nbs
p; “So, what’s new? He’s my boss. He’s not here to baby me and make me feel good about myself.”
“India, look—”
“Just leave it, Montana,” I plead. “I can handle myself. I know what I’m doing, okay? You just need to trust that I’m strong enough to know my limits. If it gets to be too much, I’ll quit. I promise.”
Montana sighs, staring at her hands. “The trouble is, India, I think you believe you’re made of stone. Just like him. And you’re not. There’s clearly more to this than you’re letting on, and you’re going to end up with more pain than you bargained for. I don’t want to see that happen.”
I take a deep breath. What does Montana know about how strong I can be? And how can she possibly sense that there’s more to this? I haven’t told her how much he’s come to mean to me. I haven’t told her how I feel. But maybe I don’t need to.
Is it that obvious to everyone that I’m falling for the wrong man?
I cross my arms defensively. “Look, you don’t need to worry. Everything is going to be okay.”
Montana stares at me for a moment, like she’s trying to figure out who the person in front of her is. Then she stands up and grabs her water bottle from the counter. “If that’s what you believe. But just be careful. I don’t want to have to watch you crumble.”
As she leaves, I feel my heart sink. She’s right about everything. I’m out of my depth with William Walker. But he doesn’t need to know that he’s got me in a mess. I’m not going to let him see the effect he’s had. I set my face into a hardened expression. I lift my chin up.
I convince myself I’m fine, even if no one else is fooled but me.
* * *
The ride to work seems to take forever, but forever doesn’t last long enough. As we pull up in front of William’s house, I’m almost consumed by dread. I take a deep breath, hoping that no one will notice that my hands are shaking. I have to take this one step at a time. Minute by minute. Hour by hour. Day by day. I’m so close to being rid of William forever. I’m not going to back out of this for anything.
Henry gives me a sympathetic look as he turns the car around and drives off, probably to run some errands. I blush hard. Maybe he’s noticed the tension too. But I can’t let myself fall apart and fulfill everyone’s expectations. I have to play this cool. I opt to knock on the front door so that I don’t wake Rosie. It takes a few minutes, but soon enough William shows up, holding Rosie against his chest. He looks tired. Tired, but beautiful.
He almost looks shocked to see me, as though he’d forgotten I work here now. Either that or he was hoping he’d broken me down enough to scare me off. Well, hah. Thought you’d seen the last of me, William? Not a chance.
“India...good morning.”
I nod curtly to him, before raising an eyebrow. He’s standing in my way. He hastily moves out of my path and I enter the house, keeping my shoulders square as I do. I have to ooze confidence, as though I’m the dominant one here. I have to look the part, even if I don’t feel it. Perhaps I’m a better actress than I think, because all of a sudden William is stumbling over his words, trying to say something.
“Listen, India... I mean, the weekend...well, I just think—”
I hold up my hand to silence him. “I don’t want to hear another word,” I say quietly. “I’m not interested in what you’ve got to say on the matter.” I focus on Rosie. “Hello, gorgeous princess.”
She grins at me, and I cup her hair and give her a smile too.
“Not even if I’m trying to say I’m sorry?” William sounds frustrated, forcing me to glance back up at him.
That’s not what I was expecting. I was expecting excuses, defense strategies, battle talk. Anything to protect his own skin. But here he is, actually prepared to take the blame for what happened over the weekend. Am I really going to shut him down before he says anything?
William seems to take my shocked silence as a good thing. He adjusts Rosie in his arms. “Look...if you just give me ten minutes to get Rosie settled, we can sit down and talk properly. Except for a couple of conference calls, my schedule is relatively free today.”
“I’m so glad you can find time for me in your busy schedule,” I say, trying for a mocking tone. But my heart isn’t really in it. I want to hear him out, even though I promised myself I wouldn’t give him any leeway. This is a dangerous path for me to take. He might start thinking he can get away with anything, the way he used to. But it’s so tempting that I just nod.
William exhales audibly, then nods in return, rocking Rosie gently as he heads for the stairs. He’s speaking softly to the baby, and it warms my heart. I wish it didn’t. I don’t want to trust him or think of him as anything but my nightmare boss. Otherwise this all becomes too hard.
I move through to the living room and sit down, trying to compose myself for this conversation. Part of me knows, though, that I’m totally unprepared for it.
When William returns, I’m as ready as I’ll ever be. He sits on the couch, but as far from me as possible. Maybe he’s scared of how I might react to this conversation. If he knew anything at all, he’d know I’m all bark and no bite. He’d know that I feel just as vulnerable as he does right now.
William takes a deep breath, raking a hand through his hair. “Okay. So... I guess I should start by saying I’m sorry, again.”
I stare at his throat, unable to meet his gaze. Forcing my voice to sound level, I ask, “About which part?”
“For leaving you alone like that. After you...after you did what you did... I wanted to follow you. I did. But I had some concerns.”
“Concerns about what? Human contact?”
There’s dead silence.
I lift my gaze, wanting to cry as our eyes meet. William is giving me a pleading, totally helpless look. “India, come on. Are you really going to make me spell it out for you like this?”
I swallow, forcing myself to hold his gaze. I want him to know that’s exactly what I’m expecting him to do. He sighs, moving his thumb to his lips. He nibbles at his skin, avoiding eye contact.
“Okay... I was concerned about the consequences. Concerned about how it might affect our work together. Concerned that I wouldn’t be good enough for you. Concerned that if I slept with a woman so beautiful, so funny, so intelligent...that it would have a more permanent effect on me than anything ever has.”
I almost feel sympathetic, but then I remember that the Walker boys are masters of wordplay. He probably has me exactly where he wants me. I fold my arms, shaking my head. “No. Don’t feed me that bullshit.”
“I swear, India, it’s not a line. I... I guess I’m scared of messing things up before they even get started.”
“I was looking for a one-night stand, not a marriage proposal.”
William blushes. “I understand. But that’s complicated in itself. You’re my employee...”
“Just barely.”
“Right. But still, you work for me for the time being. Sex can...complicate things. These past two weeks have been complex enough. Don’t you see that adding something else to the equation makes this entire scenario even crazier?”
I roll my eyes. “Trust you to overcomplicate everything. Why does it have to mean more than what it is on paper?”
William gives me a knowing look. “After your response to this, I think we both know we couldn’t pass it off as meaningless.”
He’s so annoyingly right. I don’t want to admit it, but he’s completely spot-on—I can’t have a meaningless experience with William. Someone’s feelings will get hurt. This whole time, I was expecting that I was the one who would suffer most. But what if William’s feelings are as strong as mine?
What if William is scared too?
He shuffles a little closer to me on the couch and my heart leaps in my chest. He looks down at his lap as he works up the courage to speak. “I’m not saying that any
of this would be a good idea,” he begins carefully. “But...maybe instead of diving in the deep end, we could...just spend some time together?”
“You think that after everything you’ve put me through that I want to spend more time with you? More time being humiliated?”
William glances up at me. A ghost of a smile plays on his lips and he suddenly looks so gorgeous and boyish and mesmerizing that it’s almost scary. “I think that despite it all, you do. You want to be around me. You want to explore these feelings. I can see it in your eyes.”
I resist the urge to cover my face. I’m sick of my expressions giving me away. Because he’s right. Even after everything, I want to stay here, with him.
He’s looking at me. He’s waiting for a reaction. I want to lean forward and kiss him, but if I did, it would feel like I was betraying myself. I can’t give in easily to him just because he’s made some kind of apology.
I clear my throat. “Here’s how this is going to work. You’re going to get one chance, and one chance only. We can spend this evening together. No touching, just talking. We can see how it goes. And then we’ll take it from there. But I swear, you’d better come up with something good. I’m not sticking around if you’re going to cause me more problems.”
William allows himself to smile, finally. “Don’t worry, India. I’m not planning on messing up my final chance with you.”
Sixteen
William
When Rosie starts crying at 10:00 a.m., I couldn’t be more relieved. The atmosphere in my office has been tense since India and I relocated there today. She’s not said much since our earlier conversation, and I don’t blame her. After the debacle on Friday night, she has every right to be wary of me. But I’m determined to prove to her that she’s not making a mistake by giving me one last chance.
I have to get this right. That’s the one thought that keeps running through my head. I’m keenly aware of it each time I look at her. To me, she seems out of my league. She’s too good for me in every single way, and I have to make tonight count. I have to step up and prove that I’m the man she wants me to be.
