by Raathi Chota
“I just come here because he’s here.”
“All right, listen up!” I glanced up and saw Coach Harris enter the room, which made everyone scramble to their seats. “You are all a disappointment to this school! Vandalizing the school and giving it a bad name…like why the heck do you still come here?”
“We’re forced to come here,” one guy replied.
“It’s not like we have a choice,” a girl with short blonde hair added.
“Whatever, now you’ll spend the rest of the day writing out how sorry you are for being such idiots. Why can’t you be like Max?” Coach Harris asked as he handed out the papers.
“Who’s Max?”
“My pet fish,” he answered as I snorted. Coach Harris looked down at me as his eyes widened. “Willson? What the hell are you doing in here?”
“She slapped Kelly West.” The guy in front laughed. Everyone turned to look at me, an impressed look on his or her face. Coach’s eyes widened as he raised his hand.
“That’s awful,” he mumbled, but I noticed the sudden twitch of his lips.
“Finally, someone had the balls to do it,” a girl muttered.
“Okay, enough. Last one to finish their five hundred word apology will have to do laps,” Coach announced. I sighed to myself as I began to write, and the strangest thing was, I had a lot to say sorry for.
***
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Benny asked as he cupped his hand over mine. It was morning, and I had another nightmare. The first thing I did was call Benny; it made sense since he’s the only one that knew. Dad was asleep as Mom made us coffee. I didn’t say he should come over, but he insisted. Benny caressed my hand.
“I’m all right,” I mumbled, then looked up at him. “Sorry for disturbing you,”
“It’s okay. I was gonna laze around the whole day anyway.” He shrugged, then removed his hand as my mother placed two cups in front of us.
“What about Thanksgiving?” Mom asked.
“Oh, my family drove to Wisconsin to visit some relatives,” Benny said.
“Why didn’t you go?” I asked.
“Mid-terms, plus it’ll be boring anyway. Just my little brother with my little cousins and adults,” Benny answered as he sipped his coffee.
“You’re welcome to stay here!” Mom spoke up. I gaped at her as Benny almost choked on his drink.
“Err, I don’t thi—”
“It’s a splendid idea! Benny dear, you’re always coming here during the week, and we barely have time to talk because of you two studying. It’ll be a great opportunity for Harry and me to get to know you better!”
“T-thank you, Mrs. Willson, looking forward to it.”
“Plus, you’re the only one who knows about these scary nightmares my daughter’s been having, so any help is needed!” Mom added, then walked out of the kitchen.
“I won’t let you down, Mrs. Willson!” Benny exclaimed. He turned to me with a goofy grin on his face. I looked away and thought about how the rest of the day would turn out. Benny scooted next to me and put his arm around my waist while he drank his coffee with his other hand. “This is gonna be an awesome weekend.”
When my father shuffled in, Benny immediately dropped his arm and slid to the end of the counter. “Morning, Mr. Wil—”
“When did you get here?” Dad asked as he squinted his eyes at Benny. Even though Benny came to the house often, Dad was still overprotective, but slowly he was beginning to trust Benny.
“Fifteen minutes ago, sir,” Benny answered as he avoided eye contact.
“Benny’s staying over for dinner,” I spoke up.
“Hmm, well, you’re early.” Dad eyed Benny suspiciously.
“He’s just a good friend, Dad. Come on, Benny,” I said, then grabbed his wrist as we walked out the kitchen. Benny immediately pulled away, but I didn’t turn back as we walked upstairs.
“Keep that door open!”
“Y-Yes, Mr. Willson,” Benny called as we entered my room. I quickly made my bed up as Benny played with the things in my room. Once I was done, he collapsed on the bed.
“What now?”
“Take a shower. Then we’ll head over to my place so I take a shower, then we can chill till dinner,” Benny suggested as he hugged my heart pillow.
“Okay cool,” I said. I took out a cream sweater and blue jeans from my closet. I spun around. “Didn’t you take a shower already?”
“Nope, plus do you really think I’d show up to the dinner table in this?” he asked, and I glanced down to the casual attire that he topped off with Converse. I laughed, then walked into my bathroom and shut the door. I took a quick shower because I never had Benny alone in my room before. Once I was done, I walked out to see him in the middle of the room with his back to me.
“Benny?” I whispered. He whipped around with a pained look in his eye.
“What is this?” he demanded as he held the cigarette pack. My mouth opened and closed, but nothing came out. “Are you using it?”
“No, it’s not mine. It’s Blake’s,” I croaked out as I reached for it, but he stepped back.
“I thought it was only for the bet!” he exclaimed as his grip tightened on the pack. “He got you back on these?”
“N-no, I took it from him because I was—”
“How many did you take?”
“Benny, I’m keeping it for him. Please, you have to believe me. I don—”
“I believe you, but give it to him as soon as possible, or even better, get rid of it,” he muttered, then tossed the pack on the bed. I went after it like a dog and picked it up. Blake didn’t know I had them. Why would he care? He used one pack in two days, and I barely smoked. There was an awkward silence as I put the pack in the drawer. I quietly sat on my bed and looked up at him. Benny had his arms folded as he stared at the ground. I noticed when he was mad or frustrated he’d yell then be silent. “You ready?” he asked after a while. I slowly nodded. I was shocked because he walked out as if nothing happened. I told my parents that I’d be back in the afternoon to help with dinner and they were okay with it. We got into Benny’s car and drove in silence to his house.
I followed him into his house; it was similar to mine but looked like it had more rooms. The front door creaked as Benny pushed it open. Inside it seemed very modern; the furniture had the basic brown, gray, and black colors.
“Benny, I’m sorry,” I mumbled as we walked upstairs. He looked over his shoulder with an expressionless look.
“It’s okay, I just…”
“I’m fine, there’s nothing to worry about,” I assured him, then rubbed his arm. He gave me a sad smile, then led me to his room.
“Make yourself at home,” he stated, opening the door. I took in the room of the guy who had bullied me for years. Gray walls covered with posters of football players and musicians. A cluttered desk with a laptop in one corner, and opposite that a TV with two beanbags. His bed was in the center of the room with a black headboard and bedside tables.
“Nice room,” I commented as he typed on his phone.
“Thanks, err…I won’t be long.” I didn’t know what to do, so I laid on his bed. I was tired. Benny’s cologne mixed with fresh scent came from the bed. I smiled and took a deep breath as I absorbed his smell. Afterward, I took out my phone and scrolled through my contact list. My finger stopped at a name. I heard the shower run, so I had enough time.
Lana: Thanks for picking up my glasses on Thursday.
I waited for a reply as I sat on the bed. Maybe he’s busy with his family. I stood up and gripped the phone in my hand as I paced the room. It caught me off guard when it vibrated and played only a few seconds of my ringtone until I answered.
“Hey, you finally answered!” a familiar husky voice erupted through my phone.
“What do you want?” I barked, not in the mood to talk him, of all people.
“Are you still mad, princess?” Levi cooed.
“Yes! And don’t think when you come here, ever
ything will be perfect, because I want an explanation…from the start!” I muttered into the phone. There was dead silence at the other end of the line as I took sharp breaths.
“You breathe loud,” he said after I calmed down.
“Goodbye, Levi,” I hissed and ended the call before he could reply. I was about to throw my phone against the wall until it buzzed.
Blake: It’s okay.
Lana: Okay.
Blake: You starting some fault in ours stars shit?
Lana: Do you have to swear?
Blake: Sorry.
Lana: It’s okay.
Blake: Okay.
Lana: Happy Thanksgiving.
Blake: Thanks, you too.
Lana: Okay.
Blake: Are you home?
Lana: No, why?
Blake: No reason.
Lana: Okay.
Blake: Okay
Lana: Enjoy. the rest of the weekend.
Blake: You too.
I put my phone on the table and sighed. Who knew two guys could cause such stress when they weren’t even here? I heard whistles from the hall, followed by a shadow. Benny entered the room with a towel draped around his hips. Make that three guys. His eyes widened as his cheeks flushed.
“Oh, sorry, I forgot…”
“No, err…it’s okay,” I said, turning to his window. I heard shuffles on the other side of the room, then hops. I slowly turned my head and saw Benny in a pair of black jeans and black Vans. He was shirtless as he dried his wet hair with the towel. I glanced down to his toned chest, then back at him. I watched as he picked up two button-up shirts and held them in each hand.
“Okay, which one?” he asked. I tapped my chin as I pictured him with each of them on.
“That one.” I pointed to the gray shirt. Benny smiled as he spun around to put the other one back. His back muscles flexed as he did so. I bit the inside of my cheek as I balled my fist. His muscles flexed as he put on the shirt. He spun around and moved through the room as he buttoned it up. “You look good,” I said as he sat beside me.
“Thanks.” He lightly chuckled. I rested my hands behind me as we stared at each other; his hair was wet from the shower as it covered his face. I didn’t know what came over me, but I leaned forward and brushed it out of his face. He bit his bottom lip as our faces were inches apart. I looked into his dark brown eyes, then at his mouth. My hand was on his cheek as we stared at each other. I couldn’t take the awkward silence anymore, so I leaned forward and kissed him. His soft, warm lips filled me as he kissed back. It felt like time froze as I sat there, his lips tugged on mine for entrance, and I let him. I tilted my head as he cupped my cheeks and deepened the kiss.
“Any Nielsons home?” a familiar voice echoed through the house. Benny pulled away from the kiss and cursed under his breath. I panted from the long kiss as I tried to avoid eye contact. He got up from the bed and walked out of the room as I trailed behind. One thing I knew was that kiss caused trouble. I didn’t know why I did it, but I enjoyed it.
“Hey, dude, wanna hang?” Liam asked as Benny entered the kitchen. I took my time as I thought about his lips against mine.
“What the hell are you guys doing here?” Benny hissed as I entered the kitchen.
“We know you’re alone today, so we wanted to keep you company,” Nick said. His eyes landed on me and widened. “But seems like you already have company.”
“It’s Thanksgiving,” I spoke up.
“Yeah, well, I only have to be back before dinner.” Liam shrugged.
“And I just don’t want to help. That’s why I have other siblings,” Nick added.
“You didn’t even call.” Benny huffed as he folded his arms.
“We did, but no one was answering,” Liam said as he looked at us.
“Not to be rude or anything, but what are you doing here, Lana?” Nick asked, but his gaze was on Benny.
“Her mom invited me for Thanksgiving dinner,” Benny mumbled.
“Wanna get ice cream before dinner?” Liam asked. I peeked over at Benny, who scrunched his nose up.
“It’s almost winter.”
“Almost,” Liam remarked.
“I’ll take my car,” Benny sighed as Liam listed flavors.
“I’ll go with Liam,” I stated as I walked to the other side of the room. Nick gave us weird looks as he followed Benny to his vehicle.
***
“Finally,” Liam sighed as we entered a coffee shop in a small suburb. We drove around for an open place; most of them were closed because it was Thanksgiving. When we sat down, I made sure not to sit with Benny. Tension seemed to surround us after the kiss. Since it was almost dinner, we decided on two big waffles. I shared with Liam while Nick and Benny divided the other one.
“How does one recover from bad dreams?” Nick asked. I stared at him in confusion, then glanced at Benny. He must’ve told him about my dreams.
“I don’t know,” I mumbled, then continued to eat.
“Your mom said your nightmares are getting worse,” Benny scoffed.
“It’ll go away.”
“Your mom found you in the corner of your room crying one morning!”
The café went silent as everyone looked at our table, Liam apologized, and everyone got back to what they were doing. Benny huffed as he poked his waffle. One thing I’d learned over the years knowing Benny Nielson was that he had a quick temper. It actually scared me when he’d be quiet one minute then roaring like thunder the next.
“I had a dream the other night,” Liam mumbled as I pushed the plate toward him. I watched as he devoured the rest of the great waffle. Once he was done, he looked up.
“What was it about?”
“Nightmare, actually. That creepy dude that we buried walked into our Physics classroom and caught us. Long story short, we ended up in jail and Nick became gay.”
“Dude,” Nick groaned as he kicked Liam’s leg under the table.
“Scary and weird at the same time,” I said, then looked at my phone. “Crap, we gotta go. Mom needs help, and I still need to get ready.”
Nick paid for our food as we went our separate ways. I climbed into Benny’s car and sighed. It was going to be a long night. As he drove, I stared out the window. None of us spoke, yet I had so much to say.
“Sorry,” Benny mumbled after a while. I turned to look at him; he had no expression as he drove. “Just really worried because you come to school with bags under your eyes, yet nobody says anything because you have such—” Benny cut himself off as he took a deep breath. “You have such a beautiful smile that it’s hard to ask you something that will make you frown.”
I didn’t know what to say. We arrived at my house, and I watched as Mom paced up and down while Dad was nowhere to be found.
“Lana, go get changed!” Mom scolded as she placed something in the oven. I gave Benny one last look, then bolted up the stairs. There was a beautiful white dress on my bed. I grazed my fingers over it as I thought of my mother. It was a sleeveless dress that ended above the knee. I put on my camel-colored boots, then slipped on a maroon cardigan to give off an autumn look. I decided to leave my hair loose while I put on makeup.
When I walked downstairs, I came face to face with my father. He wore a dark blue sweater, black jeans, and brown shoes. He eyed me up and down and gave me a warm smile and raised his arms. I approached him and let him engulf me.
“You look gorgeous, honey,” he mumbled in my ear.
“Thanks, Dad, you look good too,” I said as we pulled apart. He gave me a small smile as he ruffled my hair. As I fixed it, I walked into the kitchen and saw Benny with the salad. He seemed concentrated as he squinted his eyes with his tongue stuck out. I leaned on the doorframe and watched him cut the tomatoes, then add it to the salad. I walked next to him and leaned on the island.
“Didn’t know you could make a salad,” I joked. He laughed as he looked up but immediately stopped when he took in my appearance.
“You look beautiful—
”
“Lana, finally! Come help set the table,” Mom ordered as she walked in. I gave Benny an apologetic smile as I strolled into the living room; it was the most significant room in the house since it had an open area on one side and the sofas on the other. There were six plates out as well as the cutlery. As I set the table, I heard laughter. When I looked over my shoulder, I saw Mom and Benny walk in.
“And this is when she went trick or treating,” Mom cooed as she pointed to her phone. I looked over her shoulder and saw the photo of Levi and me when we were dressed up.
“He looks oddly familiar,” Benny said as he squinted his eyes. I playfully rolled my eyes as I thought of Benny and Levi when we were little. It was in fourth grade, and Benny, Nick, Aidan, Ethan, Jennifer and I were in the same class. Levi was in the fifth grade, but he was well known as the clown of elementary school, along with Aidan. Levi left the following year, so he became another face to remember.
“Oh, that is Mrs. Radc—” Mom began but was interrupted by the oven. She bolted into the kitchen and left her phone in Benny’s hands. He approached me with a confused look as he stared at the picture.
“You remember him.” I grinned as he swiped to the next image, which showed Levi and me at the beach at eight and nine years old.
“Don’t tell me. I know him. It’s on the tip of my tongue.” Benny would’ve remembered if he’d seen an older image of Levi. The doorbell broke the comfortable silence, and Benny set my mother’s phone down. “I’ll get it.” He smiled as Mom came into the living room. My mother stood next to me as she took in my appearance and I took in hers. She wore a long-sleeve dress that ended below her knee, her hair up in a tight bun as she smiled at me.
“Where’d you get the dress?” she whispered.
“I thought you got it for me.” I raised a brow. Before she replied, Benny came into the living room with an embarrassed look.
