by Tillie Cole
“Did…did you like it? Did I do it correctly?”
Dipping forward, I pressed my forehead to her forehead. “You couldn’t fuck up if you tried with those perfect fat lips.”
I trailed my lips down her cheek, and Lilah wrapped her hands in my hair, pulling me back down to her mouth. She was more sure of herself this time, her lips pushing against mine, her tits brushing against my chest.
But then her tongue pushed back in my mouth and met mine and I pulled back. “Lilah,” I rasped with a tense jaw. “If we ain’t gonna fuck, I need you to stop, baby.”
Lilah snapped away her hands from my hair like they caught fire and I dropped my head to her chest, trying to rein myself in. Her vanilla smell weren’t helping one damn bit.
“I am sorry, Ky. I—”
Sliding to the side of Lilah, I said, “Don’t fuckin’ dare, woman. Don’t apologize. That was fuckin’ amazing.”
Reaching over Lilah’s rigid body, I flicked off the lamp beside the bed and moved back to my side. I wrapped my hand around Lilah’s waist and brought her into my chest.
“Ky! What—”
“You may not wanna fuck me yet, baby, but you let me touch you, have your mouth on mine and now I ain’t ever gonna stop touching you, kissing you. Yeah?”
“Okay,” Lilah said, feigning a defeated sigh. I smiled into her long hair, my nose nuzzling into the long strands and my hand around her waist, ironclad as I kissed along her exposed neck.
Lilah’s hand lay on top of mine, and I felt her body relax.
I closed my eyes, the most comfortable I’d ever been in my life, when another gust of vanilla filled my nostrils. “You always smell of vanilla.”
“Does it please you?” she asked nervously.
“I fuckin’ love it.” Lilah’s finger started tracing patterns on the back of my hand. “Why do you always smell of vanilla?”
Lilah’s hand stopped, and I knew I’d asked the wrong question. “We were… to always be free of hair and anointed with vanilla oil. The cursed had to be pure. We had to be as clean as possible to be taken by the elders. It is a routine, a habit I cannot break. I’m always striving to be as pure as possible.”
Yeah. I wished I’d never asked.
Pulling Lilah closer into my chest, I pressed another kiss into her hair and said, “Sleep, baby.”
Silence filled the room until she said, “Thank you, Ky… for everything…”
Fuck.
*****
Lilah
The rising sun broke through the darkness of the room, and I had to blink several times to gather my bearings. Wooden walls, plaid linen… strong arm wrapped around my waist.
Ky’s ranch.
Feeling my heart swell at Ky holding me in his arms, I rolled over very carefully and studied his sleeping face.
He was so beautiful.
Things had changed for me so drastically in regards to this man. My feelings were so strong that I almost could not stand it. He was becoming the center of my world.
He was completely changing my life.
For the first time in my life, when I was with Ky, I did not feel like Delilah, a Cursed sister of Eve, just plain Lilah… an ordinary girl who had finally been kissed by a boy.
Seeing the room turn from the dark blue of the night to the orange glow of the dawn, I slid from underneath his arm, pressed a soft kiss against his slightly parted lip, feeling a full force of butterflies in my stomach and made my way out of the door, down the stairs, and onto the cabin’s wraparound porch. I took a seat on a wooden rocking chair and sighed at the blissful ambience.
The morning air was crisp, the birds were singing in the trees, and the sun was rising in the east. It was beautiful out here. I could sit here for hours just watching the Lord’s creation showcased at its best.
“Morning, Lilah!” Elysia’s voice called out from over the field, and I saw her walking back toward me from the stables, denim pants on her legs and a plaid shirt on top. I jumped up from my chair, embarrassed that I had not dressed. I hadn’t expected anyone to be up yet and was shamed that I looked so unkempt.
Elysia jumped onto the porch and dropped a bunch of ropes she was holding. “Hell, girl, sit down.” Elysia gestured, and doing as she said, I sat back down on the rocking chair.
Elysia sat next to me. “I didn’t expect to see you guys until later on.”
“I always rise at dawn. I have done so all my life and it is a habit I have yet to break. Plus, I love watching the sunrise and listening to the birds. It always makes me feel better.”
Elysia smiled. “I’m the same, girl. But I gotta foal born a couple’a days ago, so I’m getting up all times of the night.”
I watched Elysia and wondered why Ky had not mentioned he had a sister before. She must be around my age, twenty-four, possibly younger, and she lived out here alone? Elysia caught me staring, and I dipped my head with embarrassment.
“You’re wondering why he keeps me a secret,” Elysia stated.
Shaking my head, I said, “I…I—”
Elysia waved her hand. “It’s fine, Lilah. I wondered the same about you.”
Elysia sighed and focused on the sunrise, as did I. “Something happened to me years ago, when I was seventeen, that put me in danger. I’ve been living here ever since.”
“I am sorry to hear that,” I said sincerely. I could tell by the expression on her pretty face that whatever it was still played on her mind.
“Thank you,” Elysia replied quietly.
“Why do you not go to the compound?” I asked.
Elysia looked over to me and said, “Ky and I had different upbringings. I’m kinda separate to that life. Hell, no one knows about me but Styx.”
“Tell me. Please…” I asked, desperate to know about Ky’s past and Sia looked out unto the dawn.
“Our mother broke it off with our father when she’d just found out she was pregnant with me. None of the other brothers knew. She was sick of getting cheated on, of our father’s unfaithfulness with an endless string of club sluts, so one day she up and left. But my father found out she was leaving and wouldn’t let her take his son. He said Ky needed to be brought up around the club. Said Ky needed to eat, sleep, and breathe the life of a Hangman.
“My mother moved us out of town, not too far from here, and nine months later, she had me. My father agreed to let my mom keep me, but away from the club. The Hangmen were always at war with someone it seemed, and he wanted to keep us safe. That meant not telling anyone of our existence. Ky knew, of course, and would come over when our father went on runs, but as time passed, I saw less and less of my big brother. He was getting in deeper and deeper with the club. Same ol’ same.”
Elysia dropped her head and I held my breath, knowing whatever she would say next was going to be hard to hear. “Anyway, my mother got sick of not seeing her son and one day, when I was still only a toddler, left me with a friend so she could confront my father. But an old prison enemy and gang rival of my father’s was waiting outside, and when she came to the gate, he fired a shot. It hit my mother and she was immediately killed.
“That man was a Diablo, a biker rival, and it seemed for years after, the two clubs were at war. I was brought up away from the club with an aunt across town, and Ky would come and visit me again, becoming the brother I always dreamed of.”
Elysia sat forward and pressed her fingers to her temples. “Something bad happened to me a while back. I was in a relationship with a guy and… I’m sorry, but I can’t talk about it.”
“Please, don’t apologize,” I replied. “I know how that feels.”
Elysia cast me a grateful smile and said, “Anyway, Ky and Styx helped get me back without involving any of the Hangmen. But I was in a bad way and some dangerous people were still looking for me… still are looking for me.”
My eyes widened and I drew in a breath. Elysia noticed and gestured to the ranch. “Ky bought me this ranch, where no one would find me, and I’ve been here ever si
nce.”
“And your father?” I asked.
Elysia shrugged. “Him and the old prez, Styx’s dad, were killed last year in yet another Diablo war. In a way, their deaths, along with that of the Diablo prez and VP, produced a truce among the new officers of the clubs.” Elysia sat back in her chair and began rocking. “There’s only me and Ky now. He has the club; I have this place, rearing horses and running my ranch in solitude.”
I rocked in my seat, reeling from what Elysia had told me. Poor Ky and poor Elysia, coping with so much loss.
“My father, Ky’s father, wasn’t a great man, Lilah,” Elysia abruptly said, casting a glance back inside the cabin, I supposed checking Ky was not nearby.
Happy everything was quiet, she added, “He brought Ky up in the outlaw life and filled his head full of ‘ideals’ that were stupid. The biggest one being that women were nothing more than holes to be fucked.”
I gasped at the crudity and Elysia cringed in agreement. “Fucked up, ain’t it? But that was Big Poppa Willis. Pussies are to be licked good and fucked hard—never worshipped, and I’m afraid to say it, but Ky has lived exactly that life. I thought he was still living that life…” Elysia leaned over and touched my hand, my eyes staring into hers. “Until he brought you here yesterday, and I see how entranced he is by you.”
My stomach flipped at what Elysia was saying.
“You’re different for him, and I’m so fuckin’ happy about that.”
“You are?”
“Yeah, darlin’, I am. Ky has this ‘live life to the full’ attitude, but I knew he wasn’t always gonna stay that way. In outlaw life, without a good woman by your side, you become jaded, bitter, and in the end, fuckin’ miserable or dead. I never wanted that for my brother. But I worried he wasn’t ever gonna settle down.” Elysia freed my hand and commenced rocking once again. “This morning was the first morning I woke up and didn’t feel that immediate sense of dread wondering if he was okay.” She threw me a smile. “That’s because I know he now has you.”
Warmth spread through my body and I could feel my face blush. “And who do you have?” I tentatively asked.
Elysia lost her smile. “No one yet, and maybe no one for a while, but one day, I hope to have a man that loves me, protects me. Makes me feel safe.” As Elysia said each of those words, love, protect, and safe, Ky immediately came to mind.
I had found it with Ky. I had experienced what Elysia held as ideal.
“Until then, I got my ranch, a good vibrator and a lotta batteries,” she joked. I smiled, but had no idea what she was talking of. I did however, see the yearning for a love of her own in her soft eyes.
Footsteps suddenly pounded on the cabin floor, and within seconds, Ky burst through the door, shirtless, still only wearing his leathers.
His face was tight as he searched the porch, then his eyes relaxed when he spotted me. “Baby, there you are.” He breathed a sigh of relief. Just hearing that endearment spill from his lips made me feel so alive and my heart began to race.
“I came to watch the sunrise and hear the birds sing,” I said, and he shook his head, smirking, walking straight to me, scooping me up in his arms, pressed an owning kiss to my lips and sat me down on his lap. I stiffened in shock at the bold gesture, but Ky did not feel it or downright ignored it.
His hands immediately went into my hair and he pressed his lips to the side of my neck. I had to clench my thighs together at the explicit feelings his touch stirred in my core. Ky must have sensed my reaction, for his nostrils flared with need, and our eyes met, the same magnetic attraction evident between us.
A cough sounded, and we both met eyes with Elysia. “Nice to see such a scene, big brother, but remember I’m your sister and there is such a thing as too much!”
Ky mock saluted and my head fell to his chest. I could not help but remember the life Ky had lived, losing his mother, being brought up to believe that being loving toward a woman was wrong. Robbed of his childhood, his life was filled with violence and war. I realized, in these respects, we had not been so different after all. I felt even closer to him this morning, discovering aspects of his life, him holding me in his arms and never letting me go.
Without conscious thought, I reached down and took his hand in mine. I could feel the shock in Ky at my gesture, but he simply wrapped his fingers around mine.
I could get used to this, I thought. I could get very used to this.
A sense of limited time filled me with unease, and Prophet David’s teachings tried to break through. But I refused this day to submit to the part of me that held steadfastly to my faith.
I simply wanted to be held and cherished for the first time in my life.
“So what do you wanna do for the next couple of days?” Elysia asked.
Ky shrugged and looked down to me.
“Just be,” I said. “Just be.”
Ky smiled at me and winked and I could not help but smile back. I could not believe what I was feeling toward him. Warmth. There was an extreme feeling of warmth in my body.
Sia exhaled a long sigh beside us and rose from her seat. “I didn’t sleep a wink last night out in that barn, so I’m gonna hit the hay for a few hours.” Sia headed inside of the house, but laid a hand on Ky’s shoulder. “Take Lilah to the barn to see the colt. He so damn cute.”
Ky patted Sia’s hand, and his sister entered the house, the door shutting behind her.
“She likes you,” Ky said, and held me closer still.
“I like her,” I said and got to my feet. Turning to a shirtless Ky, I dipped my head to hide my blush at his muscled and tempting torso, and held out my hand. “Will you show me the horse?”
Ky got up and threaded his hands through mine, guiding me from the porch. Just as I hit the last step, Ky spun around, and pressed his mouth against mine.
I moaned against his mouth as he caught me by surprise and I gasped as he broke away too soon. Ky’s head tipped the side, his blue eyes on my lips and he ran his thumb over my mouth. “Perfect damn lips.”
Pulling me back into step, we headed to a large red barn, and once inside Ky took me to a stall. Reaching over the door, my hand flew to my mouth seeing a new foal standing near his mother and my eyes filled with tears.
“He’s so beautiful,” I whispered, stretching out my hand, running my fingers over his soft brown and white coat.
Ky did not say anything, just wrapped his arms around my waist from behind, his chin resting on my shoulder. Being here, at this ranch, in this stable, almost made yesterday’s attack seem like just a bad dream.
“You doing good, baby?” Ky asked his warm breath ghosting over my face.
“Yes,” I replied, and smiled as the foal began feeding from his mother. The action made me think of the conversation I just had with Sia, and I placed my hands on top of his.
“Sia told me about your mother and father this morning,” I said quietly, feeling Ky tense behind me.
“Yeah?” he rasped out, and I detect the pain in his voice.
“I am sorry that you lost them both in such violent ways. About how you and Sia were forced apart,” I told him sincerely.
“Baby…” he whispered, his forehead replacing his chin on my shoulder. I held onto his arms tightly, and I really wanted to say something.
Turning around to face Ky, my back resting against the stable door, Ky’s sad eyes met mine. “You are a good man, Ky. A very good man. Your mother would be proud of you, of how you have cared for Sia.”
Ky glanced away, but then huffed a humorless laugh. “I’m exactly like my old man, Li. My momma would be turning in her grave if she could see just how much I was like him.”
“No—” I went to argue, my hand on his cheek, but Ky cut me off.
“I’m a whore, Li. I fuck around. I’ve had so much pussy that a slut I’ve fucked could stand right in front of me and I wouldn’t even recognize her face. I’m the VP of an outlaw MC, and I’m a ruthless bastard—just like my old man. And I ain’t ever
been good to no one. Fuck! I am my old man!”
My heart broke as those words spilled from his lips. It was the first time I had seen this hard and flirtatious man look vulnerable. Ky Willis suddenly became a little more transparent in his actions. And I could finally understand why he behaved like he did… he was simply lost too. Another broken child of circumstance.
“But you are not like that with me,” I reassured and Ky stilled, his eyebrows pulled down.
“What?”
Taking a deep breath, I repeated, “You are not that way with me. You are caring. You are loving. You are my teacher, my protector. You keep me safe. Ky, you are my safety.”
Ky’s mouth opened, but then quickly closed again. He stared and stared into my eyes and I could see a storm of emotions flash through his light eyes. And then Ky pressed his chest flush against mine, his hands holding the sides of my neck.
He searched my face for something, I did not know what for. His eyes closed and his forehead dropped to mine. “Fuck, baby… Not with you…” was all he said before taking his mouth with mine, his tender kiss telling me more than any words could… he adored me.
I adored him back.
*****
The next two days were the happiest of my life.
“It was lovely to meet you,” I told Sia as she hugged me goodbye. I felt sad that I was leaving my new friend.
“You’ll be seeing me soon, Lilah,” Sia said with a knowing smile. “You can count on that.”
Sia turned to Ky and he lifted her off the floor, gripping her tight. Her mouth went to his ear and I heard her say, “You’ve found her, Ky. You’ve found the one for you. Protect her, and don’t fuck this up. Remember, you’re not our father.”
Ky kissed her cheek and we got into the truck, pulling on to the dirt track and leaving the solace of the ranch behind.
It was not long before we reached the compound, to the place where Tiff and Jules had attacked me, to the place where my quarters felt like a prison, and to a place filled with sinners who reminded me every day of the Cursed woman I was.
