by Tessa Bailey
As if he’d been slapped by shock paddles, Marcus’s entire body jolted and he whacked his head on the metal slat of the bed frame. Not that he felt it. Not that he felt anything but joy and agony, because Jamie was on his phone. Where had Joey gotten a picture of Jamie?
Marcus started breathing like he’d just run a marathon, his brain searching for details, soaking them in like a sponge. In the picture, Jamie wasn’t looking at the camera. No, he was on his phone and pacing, one hand on his hip.
Fuck. Fuck, Jamie was so hot. That guy had really been his boyfriend?
Apparently Marcus’s dick was still working despite the fact that he was half dead, because it filled with pressure as he perused the picture. His tongue craved the taste of Jamie’s shoulder blades, his neck, his mouth. God. His jeans. Those fucking jeans made his ass look like Sunday dinner and with all that sunshine surrounding him, a halo formed on his dark hair…
“Wait a minute,” Marcus muttered, trying to sit up and ramming his head into the bedframe again. “He’s at the Main Squeeze? Yeah…that’s our shop.”
Marcus army-crawled out from under the bed, the phone cradled in one hand. He stood up and immediately stumbled into a wall, stars winking in front of his eyes, dizziness refusing to loosen its grip. His stomach roared, loud enough that Marcus looked around to make sure there wasn’t a ghost tiger in his apartment. And oh my God, there was one.
Ghost tiger. Twelve o’clock.
“You’re hallucinating.”
Marcus looked down at the phone in his hand again, sighing like a schoolboy over the sight of Jamie. Was he at the shop with Joey? No. No, that was impossible.
Maybe so, but he had to find out. He had to go there.
Which meant, he had to fucking pull himself together.
Jamie. He might get to see Jamie.
Swallowing hard, Marcus edged past the ghost tiger and backed slowly into the kitchen, keeping one eye on the beast. He grabbed a box of cereal out of the cabinet and shoveled several handfuls down his throat, chasing it with water from the tap. And thank God, the ghost tiger started to fade around handful number four.
He dropped the cereal box and started to jog for the front door, only to catch a whiff of himself, turn on a heel and sprint back to the bathroom.
It was too much to hope that Jamie was in the Main Squeeze because he still loved Marcus. Way too much to hope. But suddenly there was a one percent chance that something extraordinary was taking place and that was way more than Marcus had ten minutes ago. If he had one percent to work with, he would work the hell out of it. At the beginning of the summer, Marcus thought he’d had a zero percent chance with Jamie Prince and look what happened. He’d won him, even if it was just for a little while.
It was proof that miracles happened.
Marcus sped through his shower and dove into his clothing, finger combing his wet hair on the way out the door. Instead of turning in the direction of the Main Squeeze, though, he paused in the middle of the street, chest heaving…and he walked in the direction of his father’s building. His pulse boomed in his ears, but he was grateful for the fear this time. It meant possibilities. It meant he was doing the right thing. The only thing.
He was owning himself.
Even though he had keys, Marcus buzzed his father’s bell and climbed the stairs once he was let inside. His father stood at the door with a shaggy eyebrow quirked, raising it higher when Marcus walked straight past him into the apartment.
“Did Joey tell you?”
He shook his head, visibly confused. “Tell me about what?
“That’s definitely a no.” Marcus’s mouth dried up. “Dad, I have to tell you something important and I don’t want you to say anything. Just listen and think about it and come find me later. Can you do that? You might say the wrong thing and I don’t want that between us.”
Marcus’s father went to the dining room table and lowered himself into a chair.
God, what he wouldn’t have given to have Jamie standing there with him. He would just give him that constant eye contact that said I see you.
“I’m in love, Dad. With a man named Jamie.” The buckles that had been strapped across his chest for years loosened, one by one. “Being with girls never felt right to me. Never, not once. But I didn’t know—I had no idea that I was gay until I met Jamie. And then a lot of things started to make sense. I’ve only ever wanted him like this. With my whole self. No one else. My heart doesn’t care if he’s a man or a woman, he’s just Jamie.” Marcus stopped to gather himself. “It might be too late for him and me…but it’s never too late to be honest. This is who I am. I’m your same son. I just love someone you weren’t expecting.
“I should have told you and Joey sooner, but I don’t think anyone realizes how much pressure dudes put on each other. It’s like never-ending. Getting laid, scoring phone numbers, does she have a friend. It never fucking stops. And you know something? I don’t think women are desperate enough to sleep with a lot of us pricks in the first place. Most of the bragging is just bullshit and posturing and…I finally realize that now. I’ve been scared of nothing. Being accepted? Maybe I don’t accept them. I just want Jamie. I don’t care who knows it anymore.” He swallowed the knot in his throat. “I hope you can still love me, Dad. And if you can’t? Tough shit.”
Marcus and his father stared at each other across the dining room for long minutes, nothing but the sound of the foot traffic passing outside. The extended silence made Marcus’s throat feel thick and parched, but he refused to be disappointed. Not in his father or himself. He would not treat the best thing that ever happened to him like a tragedy.
Assuming his father needed time to think their conversation over, Marcus turned on a heel and strode toward the door, pulling it open—
“Son, wait.”
*
Jamie stared out the window of the Main Squeeze in disbelief.
Late last night, he and Joey had hung a Grand Opening sign outside, thinking it would attract some interest. It had—to put it mildly. There were at least fifty people in line. Look what you built, he said silently to Marcus, pride straightening his back. You did this.
“We ready to go, pal?” Joey said, coming up beside him, rubbing his hands together. “Finally got these recipes down, let’s make some fuckin’ juice, huh?”
“That wasn’t the deal.” Jamie backed away from the window. “I told you I’d get the place set up, then you’re on your own.”
“Marcus is on the way. Just help me out for the first few minutes,” Joey cajoled, once again harpooning Jamie in the heart by reminding him of Marcus. “You don’t want to be late opening on day one and sink this place with bad Yelp reviews, do you? Come on.” He threw some shadow punches in the vicinity of Jamie’s ribs. “Where’s your sense of team spirit?”
“You’ve been napping on a crate for the last two hours.”
“Ahhh. I was just resting my eyes.”
Jamie snorted. Outwardly, he was keeping it together. He hoped. On the inside, he was in a panic thinking of Marcus walking through the door. How was he going to walk away again? He didn’t know, but he had to find a way. For now, though, he was stuck. He hadn’t worked around the clock for two days to send the whole operation down the tubes in the eleventh hour. “All right, open the doors. You take the register, I’ll juice. I’m giving you twenty minutes.”
Joey whooped and stepped around Jamie, keys in hand. Jamie went to stand behind the counter, putting on his gloves and firing up the juicers. For the next little while, everything was a blur. One second, the shop was quiet, save the buzzing of the halogen lights. The next, it was brimming with CrossFit bros—and he’d been right about hanging the wall mirror. They were clustered around it like moths to a flame. There was a lot of ball busting, shoving and insults, too. If these were the guys Marcus was around at the gym every day, he probably felt a lot more than just pressure from his family to stay in the closet, didn’t he?
Don’t think about it now.
Doesn’t matter now. Joey called out the orders and Jamie’s hands moved, taking out the fruit containers and scooping the appropriate amount into the juicers, plunging the food pusher into the chute and pulverizing carrots and apples and ginger. Just when he was pretty sure Joey would have to hop off the register and help him clear the backed up orders, Rory and Andrew sauntered in through the front door, shouldering their way through the crowd. Wordlessly, they watched Jamie for a couple minutes, then fired up their own juicers, all three of them leaning over continually to consult the recipe list.
Jamie had never loved his brothers more than he did in that moment. They didn’t understand why he was helping Joey, the man who’d fucked up his face. They’d tried to save his ass from this awful depression he’d sunk into, but they’d showed up for him anyway.
“Thanks,” he muttered around the lump in his throat.
Andrew and Rory gave him identical whatever shut up looks.
Jamie shook his head and reached under the counter to grab a fresh plastic cup to hold yet another hangover cure order when he heard a cheer go up in the shop. Without glancing up to confirm, he knew Marcus had just walked into the Main Squeeze and his stomach sank down to the floor. He wanted to soak in the sight of him, but he couldn’t allow himself to do that or he’d eliminate the iota of progress he’d made toward moving on.
Who are you kidding, liar? You haven’t even made an iota.
“Time to go,” he said to Rory and Andrew, wiping fruit debris on the legs of his jeans. Doing his best to appear casual, Jamie made sure all the orders were lined up so Marcus could pick up where he’d left off. But when he turned to leave his post behind the counter, Jamie stopped short, his heart climbing into his mouth.
Marcus blocked the exit and Jesus Christ, he looked like shit.
He’d grown a dark beard and lost weight.
His hair hadn’t been brushed.
His eyes were cradled by dark rings.
He was the most beautiful human Jamie had ever seen.
Behind him stood a man that Jamie knew on sight was Marcus’s father. It was there in the hard line of his jaw, the way he led with his chest. The guy was probably wondering who the hell Jamie was—and no way in hell was Jamie going through another hostile introduction with one of Marcus’s family members. He had to get out of there before questions got asked, but he wasn’t sure he could walk that close to Marcus without his true feelings showing on his face.
“Jamie,” Marcus mouthed over the noise, his eyes closing briefly. “Babe, your face.”
Had he called him “babe” in front of his father? Oh God, was he too exhausted or delirious to know what he was saying? Doing? “It’s fine,” Jamie said gruffly, pointing at the line of order tickers. “Start on the left and—”
He cut himself off when Marcus came toward him. Closer. Closer. Until their chests were an inch apart. All the noise in the shop dwindled to almost nothing and Jamie could feel everyone watching. Everyone. “I told my father about you,” Marcus said, his eyes roaming over Jamie’s face and hair. “I wish I’d done it weeks ago, Jamie. Told him about us. Us. Not just you.” He let out a shaky exhale. “Even if there’s no us, there’ll always be a you. The man I’m in love with. The man I’ll love forever.”
Jamie’s lungs seized, his hand shooting out to grip the counter. It was hard to rip his attention away from Marcus, but he cast a look around the room, at all the stunned faces staring back at him from the other side of the glass. At his brothers, Joey, Marcus’s father. Protectiveness toward Marcus swelled up inside him like high tide, clashing with the happiness that rose, fighting to be acknowledged. No, though. No…it was too late for all this. Wasn’t it?
“Let them watch, Jamie. Let them listen. I want everyone to know I love you. That feeling exists whether or not its approved of. Or disapproved of. It’s real, it’s good and it’s the most important part of me,” Marcus said, his throat working. “I figure I’ve got maybe a sliver of a chance here, so I’m taking it. You said your arms are too tired to pick up the pieces of what I broke? That’s fine. Because I’m jacked as shit, Jamie. I’ll carry us until you’re ready.”
A genuine laugh sailed out of Jamie before he could stop it. Fucking Diesel.
Marcus’s breath released in a rush, a hand coming up to scrub at his chest. “Ah, babe. I didn’t think I’d ever get to see you laugh again. Not up close.” He quickly wet his lips. “Give me back the faith you lost in me. Please. I won’t take it for granted again.”
Jamie was on the verge of saying yes, of course I’ll give you another chance. Saying yes, even though he’d been dead set on staying away from Marcus forever. When the man you love walks in and puts himself on the line in front of everyone for you, though? You don’t keep your head up your ass. You pull it out and hold fast to the lifeline he’s offering. And Marcus…was life. He’d become Jamie’s life, despite how opposite they were. Despite the odds against them. He was so in love with the man standing in front of him. The man offering his heart and the life Jamie had promised himself. No way he wouldn’t take it.
Before he could say anything, however, Marcus got down on one knee.
And pulled out a ring box.
Everyone in the store had a reaction. Rory and Andrew flanked him, as if prepared to hustle him out of there like bodyguards if he said the word. Joey—and seemingly every CrossFit bro in the shop—either whistled or dropped their jaws. Marcus’s father’s lips twitched.
Jamie’s eyes burned, as did the center of his chest. Oh my God. Was this happening?
“I wasn’t sure what my father was going to say, but I didn’t expect him to offer me my grandfather’s ring. To give to you. And as soon as he said it, Jamie, I knew there was nothing I want more in this fucking world than to be your husband. I think I’ve been practicing for a long time without giving it a name, you know? But I want to practice in front of the world now.” He opened the box and revealed a plain gold band, just a touch tarnished, but Jamie had a physical reaction to those perfect imperfections. Warmth spread through every inch of him, his heart rapping like a fist on a door. “Don’t just give me another chance,” Marcus rasped. “Give me the first, last and only chance you ever give another person to be your everything. If you do, I won’t just do better, I’ll do the best by you. Will you? Will you marry me, Jamie Prince?”
“Yes, Marcus.” Jamie swiped his forearm across his eyes, failing to keep his voice steady. “I love you, too and I’ll marry you. Tomorrow if you want. I don’t care if it’s crazy, I’m not me without you anymore. So can you please stand up now? It’s been over a week—”
Marcus didn’t just stand, he lunged, wrapping Jamie in a bear hug and knocking him back a step. Their mouths met and locked, Marcus’s fingers sliding into Jamie’s hair to cradle the back of his head as hoots and applause went up around them. Yeah, a few people left as Jamie and Marcus lost themselves in the kiss of a lifetime. But a lot more people stayed. The ones who mattered most stayed. And what Jamie and Marcus gained that day could withstand anything. Especially the test of time.
EPILOGUE
A few days later…
It was quiz night at the Castle Gate.
Jamie was working behind the bar, but Andrew had just shown up to relieve him for a couple of hours. So he could have dinner with his future father-in-law.
Even saying that in his head sounded weird.
But looking out over the crowded bar and catching Marcus staring at him like a lovesick fool made it a lot less weird. Made it kind of fucking unbelievably fantastic, actually. Damn right he was marrying that man. If he’d let himself be more objective during their week apart, he would have come to the conclusion that being without Marcus just wasn’t possible. It was hard to believe, but he’d fallen in deep, abiding love with the guy he’d once eye rolled and refused to take seriously. The guy had gotten under his skin. And that’s exactly where Jamie needed him to be. Forever.
Jamie winked at Marcus and went back to serving custo
mers. A few more minutes and he could join Marcus at the table he was saving. Something pretty damn close to excitement tugged at his gut. Since the morning Marcus had proposed, Jamie had been staying at Marcus’s place. Joey and his father had stopped by a few times to have a beer, but most of the time, Jamie was on his way out to work, so they hadn’t had time to get to know each other. But Joey and Mr. O’Shaughnessy couldn’t have been more welcoming to Jamie. Joey even gave him an awkward, back slapping hug from time to time, which was hilarious, considering Jamie’s eye still needed healing.
Was he dreaming? Sometimes Jamie wondered. A few weeks ago, he’d been trying to avoid his unlikely, closeted friend. Now they were engaged. And their families were not only accepting, they were supportive as hell, Andrew and Rory included. One look at Jamie’s face after Marcus proposed and they’d taken turns shaking Marcus’s hand, then went back to making juice. Juice that had earned them five stars on Yelp and an insatiable customer base.
Yeah, business at the Main Squeeze was booming.
Jamie was so proud of Marcus, he was bursting at the seams.
He was so in love, he could barely see straight.
Life was…incredible.
Unable to help himself, Jamie cast another glance in his fiancé’s direction, but Marcus was no longer alone. His father and Joey had just joined him, both of them raising a hand in greeting to Jamie. He waved back, contentedness settling on his shoulders like a wool blanket.
Andrew nudged him in the side. “Go.”
Jamie surveyed the busy bar. “You sure?”
“Yeah, Rory is stopping by soon to give you a breather. I can cover until he gets here.”
“Thanks.”
Andrew clapped Jamie on the back. “Happy for you, man.”
Jamie’s throat pulled too tight for him to answer. He nodded and turned to leave, but he stopped short when he saw a familiar face passing through the crowded bar. It was the same cop that had watched them at the boardwalk a couple weeks ago. The same cop that Andrew had seen outside their house. Jamie and Andrew watched the man circle the bar, his eyes on the brothers all the while, before throwing them a salute and leaving the same way he came.
