by Riley Ashby
“Goddammit, Eva, what did I tell you about coddling him?”
“He’s a child!” Eva’s voice was thick as she dropped me to the ground. When I looked up, I saw my father had her jaw in his hand, his face a mask of fury. “I won’t let you turn him into another you. He deserves a better future.”
“You are not responsible for raising my son. You’re a body, nothing more.” His hand shifted to her hair, and he dragged her behind him as he left the room. Just before he left, he turned to look at me again. “This isn’t over, Meyer. You’ll learn your lesson eventually, just like she will.”
I pushed off her abruptly, pulling her bonds loose so she was free. My skin was clammy and cold, and my heart felt like it had migrated to my throat. Madeline fell to the floor at my feet, curling into a small ball. I panted as I looked down at her, trying to reorient myself to this room. This timeline. The woman in front of me, vulnerable and tender, still with some hope left for the world.
I had to get away from her.
My heart thudded as I stepped back from her. “Don’t expect such consideration in the future.”
I walked to my wardrobe, pulling on the first clothes I could find. I didn’t care what I wore. Just something that would allow me to get out of this room in a decent state. I heard scurrying as Madeline pushed herself into the corner, too stupid with fear to find a true hiding space. I pulled a shirt over my head and looked over. Her head was turned against the wall, and she was whispering furiously to herself.
“…hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will…”
“If you fight me tomorrow, I’ll follow through,” I said, and she jumped. Her face was hidden behind her hair. I slammed the door as hard as I could as I ran out of the room.
Madeline
I didn’t relax for the entire night, convinced he would come for me eventually. I passed the darkness in a sort of daze, too tired to keep my eyes open but too afraid to properly sleep. My clothes dried cold against my skin, causing me to shiver and huddle closer around myself in the corner. I didn’t have the energy to consider why he’d stopped just short of violating me; all I knew was I was safe for a few hours longer.
The morning light brought me out of my stupor, and I squinted into the light. Meyer stood at the window, looking every bit the romance hero as he stared into the rising sun in those low-slung flannel pants and no shirt. Every bit the hero, except he’d tried to rape me the night before. Except he’d kidnapped me. Except that he intended to control me for the rest of my life.
I tried to keep my breathing even, willing him not to notice me. As I watched, he picked up the knife he’d been using to cut the rope tying me to the bed. Absently, I noticed he’d never taken the time to do so the night before. Without turning his head, he lifted the knife to his opposite shoulder and drew it across his skin. I couldn’t help but gasp, though he didn’t look at me. The membrane split, the blood spilling down his arm turning black with the sun behind it.
“Despite everything you think of me, my father is not a person I wish to emulate.”
I shrunk back against the wall as I realized he was speaking to me. He pulled the blade against his skin again, opening a new cut just below the first.
“Nevertheless, certain things about me cannot be undone. Habits I can’t unlearn.” He cut himself one more time, then set the knife to the side. Blood dripped from the tips of his fingers. He dragged his fingers through the rivulets running down his arm before he flipped open the lid of a metal box I hadn’t noticed before. He removed a small towel and wiped up his arm, smearing the blood even worse, then pressed it over the cuts.
“I learned to live with who I am a long time ago. It would be best if you did the same.”
He finally turned his head, checking to see if the bleeding had stopped, before dabbing at the cuts with a cotton ball soaked in alcohol. I could smell it from across the room, a sharp reek that stung my nostrils. Meyer didn’t seem to notice. Finally, he taped a patch of gauze over the injured area. His movements had a feel of something well-rehearsed, a sacred ritual of self-injury and care. He pulled on a shirt and quickly covered that with a jacket to hide the red still seeping through the bandage and fabric. At last, he turned around and met my eyes from across the room. He looked as tired as I felt.
“I’m leaving. Someone will be in to feed you and set you up for the day. I’ll be back to get you for the event.” He offered no other details, and my throat was so scratchy I couldn’t ask any questions. I simply lay on the ground, trying to avoid doing or saying anything that could set him off.
I didn’t know why I believed him, but I knew he was truly gone. I let myself move to a horizontal position, relishing for once the carpet that cradled my body. Freed of my fear for a few short hours, I fell into true sleep.
I was roused some time later by a gentle touch and met a woman who introduced herself as Denise, a massage therapist. I couldn’t imagine why Meyer would waste his money on my relaxation.
“Lie down on the bed,” she said gently, helping me to my feet. Her dark eyes narrowed when she saw my face. I raised a hand self-consciously to my bruising.
“I’m not allowed on the bed,” I whispered. I was appalled at how quickly I had given up, but Meyer had scared me last night. His body pressed against mine, all granite and fire like he wanted to entomb and consume me at once. I was in no hurry to provoke him.
“Mr. Schaf let me know it was all right for today. Just get comfortable.”
She helped me remove my shirt and shorts, leaving the underwear, and gestured to the bed again. Still suspicious but too tired to argue, I fell onto the bed. I relaxed slowly as deft fingers caressed my body, loosening the sore muscles I had been clenching in fear and anger ever since I arrived. Denise placed warm stones along my spine, and I immediately felt the heat transfer through my nervous system to my numb fingers. She worked my shoulders one at a time, rotating the stressed tendons to remind them of their range of motion. My hands received extensive attention as well; I felt every knuckle crack as she pulled blood back into my fingers. I wondered how often I could submit to losing circulation before I suffered permanent damage.
The attention lulled me into consciousness again, and when I woke, the room was dark and the stones were gone, replaced by a blanket. I dimly noticed that I was still topless and wrapped my arms around me as I searched for light and clothes. A dress hung at the entrance to his closet, looking more expensive than my entire wardrobe. Deciding to deal with that headache later, I stepped into leggings and a long-sleeved shirt, wanting to cover myself as much as possible. When I poked my head into the hallway, I was met with the smell of bacon and maple syrup, and I had to stop myself from running down the stairs to the kitchen. Joshua served me without a word, and when I finished eating, I showed myself down to the basement. I didn’t want to be in the bedroom any longer than I needed to be. But as the day went on, I couldn’t postpone what he’d asked me to do.
The dress was something I never would have chosen for myself. Gold fabric glistened with sequins and crystals against my pale skin. I was grateful for the high neckline, but the back was cut out and tailored to highlight the curves of my hips. I wanted to tear it to shreds, but I wouldn’t risk Meyer following through on his threat. It wasn’t worth testing him anymore, not when I’d seen just how far he was willing to go, and all my far-flung hopes and desires of talking sense into him shattered on the ground. I found a full makeup kit in the bathroom, probably brought in while I was sleeping, and applied foundation to cover the yellow bruising that still marred my skin.
Hours later, when he came into the room already dressed for the evening to find me sitting on the bed, he didn’t even say anything. He simply held out a box containing my shoes for the evening, then offered me his hand. I ignored it as I preceded him out the door.
I shivered slightly in the cool night air as we waited for the car to come around, wishing the ridiculous outfit had included a shawl.
“You look lovely,
” he said, surprising me.
I glared. “I don’t need your approval.” My mouth snapped shut because I knew I shouldn’t be pushing him.
He pursed his lips. “I wasn’t … I was just trying to give you a compliment.”
I crossed my arms, feeling like a petulant child but unable to stop myself. Somewhere over the course of the day, my fear had transformed into anger. “Well, don’t. It’s unsuited to your character.”
His jawline was working again. I could practically hear his teeth grinding to dust. “You know nothing about my character. Don’t assume otherwise.”
Don’t irritate him, or he’ll take you back inside. “Sorry.” I muttered the word beneath my breath.
He laughed. “I love this banter we have. We get along so well.”
I stared at him, agape, as he turned, and I saw the mocking smile hiding the left side of his face. Was he seriously joking with me right now? “This isn’t funny to me, Meyer.”
We could see the car pulling up the long drive to the house, lights slowly illuminating the pavement. I stiffened as I felt his fingers on my shoulders, then the weight and warmth of his jacket enveloped me. I hugged myself tighter, trying to touch as little of the fabric as possible. I pulled a muscle in my neck, turning to look at him. What the hell was he playing at?
“I shouldn’t have touched you like I did, when you didn’t want it.”
My heart froze. Was he going to acknowledge what he’d done? What had inspired that change in personality? I swallowed back my fear. “You tried to rape me.”
He was silent and just shook his head. “Brace yourself. My father is waiting for us.”
I turned the rest of the way to face him. Could I get him on my side before we got in front of Conrad? “Say it. Say it, and maybe I’ll accept your apology.”
He shifted, avoiding my gaze for a moment. His pride getting the better of him as usual. He opened his mouth, the hint of a word on his tongue, but then the car was in front of us. The driver hopped out and ran around to open the door for us.
Bending over, I could see Conrad leering at me from the depths of the car. Anita sat behind him, smiling sympathetically. I shrugged off Meyer’s jacket and handed it back to him as I climbed into the car as gracefully as I could. I sat on the bench next to Anita and across from Conrad; I expected Meyer to sit next to his father, but he slid in next to me. Conrad nodded briefly at his son before locking his gaze onto me.
“You’re looking much healthier, my dear. It would appear my son is taking care of you all right after all.”
I folded my arms and glared at him, but said nothing. I’d pushed my luck enough for two days. What would Meyer do to me if I disrespected his father in front of him?
Conrad’s gloating smile transformed into a grimace. “I spoke to you, girl. Do you have nothing to say?” He turned his attention to Meyer. “If you can’t beat some respect into her, I’ll do it myself. I expected better by now.”
I opened my mouth to reply, but Meyer’s palm landed on my thigh before I could get a word out. He squeezed my knee lightly.
“I told her to stay quiet,” he said, voice flat. “I don’t need her running her mouth off to everyone who speaks to her tonight.”
My eyes narrowed. What was he doing?
Conrad laughed. “Just like her mother. She was hard to break, too. I should expect the same from her daughter.”
My stomach roiled. I wanted to stand up for my mother and put this man in his place, but Meyer’s heavy hand on my knee reminded me just how much of a disadvantage I had here. His non-apology from earlier wasn’t binding; I couldn’t be sure he wouldn’t change his mind later. Maybe he’d only made that statement to lull me into a false sense of security. I observed his profile discreetly, the clean-shaven jawline and golden hair styled to the perfect degree of disarray. His head turned slightly, and he caught my eye just before I moved my gaze to my lap.
When we pulled up to the event, at the home of someone far richer than I could ever hope to be, my heart sank at the sight of how many tabloids were in attendance.
“You didn’t tell me the press was going to be here.” My heart kicked into overdrive. I pressed my fingers against the pulse in my neck, trying to count the beats. It was impossible to focus with the number of cameras pointed at my window as Conrad and Anita slipped out the other side of the car.
“This is part of the plan. We’re together now. We—”
“We are not together.”
A valet was walking toward me, reaching out to open the door. I snapped the lock closed at the last minute.
“Don’t try to gaslight me into thinking this is some sort of symbiotic relationship. You’re the shark here, and I’m trying to stay alive. That’s all that’s happening. I don’t see why you need to rub salt in my wounds.”
Meyer was already out of the car and leaned back in when I refused to get out.
“You’re stalling. Stop. Testing. Me.”
We stared at each other, though I couldn’t get a clear view of his face through the stars dancing in front of my eyes. I struggled to breathe deeply enough. Meyer flipped the automatic locks before I felt prepared, but the door behind me was suddenly open, and the valet’s hand was waiting for mine.
The poor man grimaced as I clenched his fingers, relying on him to hold me steady as I stood. I tried to let my hair fall in front of my face, but Meyer’s fingers tucked it behind my ears at the same time I felt his other arm around my waist.
“Try not to look so sick.” His mouth was against my ear. His words had the opposite of their intended effect, but I leaned against him for support. His cologne smelled familiar, comforting. As soon as I let myself relax against him, however, I mentally slapped myself and remembered he was forcing me through this. I couldn’t rely on him for protection.
“I can’t do this.” There were lights popping in my face, and I could hear reporters calling my name and asking questions. Someone had to have let them know I was coming. I wasn’t well-known enough to make the news by myself.
“It’s already in motion.” He started walking, and I had no choice but to be carried along with him. “Smile.”
“How do they know my name?” I asked instead of obeying. Maybe one of these vultures could read lips and discern the truth of my appearance here. “I’m never the one to confront you publicly about your policies.”
“Our appearance wouldn’t pack the punch we wanted if they didn’t know who you were. We’ve been feeding tips to them for the past week, hinting that I’d be appearing with someone unexpected this weekend.”
I was going to vomit. “You are fucking insane.”
He turned to look at me, struggling to keep his facial expression pleasant. He couldn’t hit me, not in front of these people, so he did something even worse.
He kissed me.
I recoiled immediately, but it was no use; his hand had climbed to the back of my neck and held me still. He tasted like whiskey and cedar, sucking me in immediately and sending my head spinning. His tongue probed at my lips.
I should be afraid of this. Crushed by what it would do to my parents when they saw this tomorrow morning without having heard from me. But at the same time, everything faded to darkness. I didn’t notice the staccato flash of camera bulbs; all I could see was his face. I didn’t hear the reporters shouting questions at me; all I could hear was his breath mingling with mine. I didn’t feel the cool evening air; all I could feel was his skin on mine. He held me against him, but I couldn’t move away even if I tried. We were tethered by spider silk wound tight around my chest, tugging me ever closer.
My eyes closed.
I didn’t think.
I parted my lips.
He hesitated at first, caught off guard, then plunged his tongue into my mouth. It wasn’t aggressive or violent. He traced along the top of my mouth, causing me to shiver. I licked his lower lip with my own before I came back to myself and pulled away.
He looked at me in awe. “What the fu
ck was that?”
The surrounding noise rushed back to my ears, cameras popping in earnest and questions called louder as the reporters lost their minds. I turned my head quickly, and he let his hand drop back to my waist.
“Don’t do that again.” I couldn’t breathe. This had to be his fault. He had done something, tricked me somehow. It wasn’t possible that I had just kissed this man in front of the entire world, not after what he’d done to me.
“Are you sure that’s what you want?”
I ignored the question and started walking again, pulling away only to be wrapped up again as he matched my pace. His damn hand wouldn’t leave my back. His lips wouldn’t leave my mind.
Meyer
I shouldn’t have done that.
I mean, it was the plan … but I hadn’t expected her reaction.
But I didn’t get too much time to think it over. Madeline walked as quickly as she could, trying to outrun me, and I found myself walking at a clip to keep up with her. She made a beeline for the bar.
“Gin and tonic. Double. Two ice cubes.” She didn’t even look at the bartender, just closed her eyes and rubbed her temples. I ordered my own drink and leaned on the bar next to her, not touching.
“Relax,” I muttered. “We’re just getting started.”
“Nothing’s getting started,” she snapped. Her hand slapped the bar top. “What happened back there was … an accident.”
I couldn’t help my smile. “I meant the evening.”
She blushed, took her drink, and downed half of it in one go.
“Slow. Down.” It was a warning now. I shouldn’t have let her order anything. She was going to make a fool of herself.
She stirred the ice cubes with her swizzle stick, then used it to macerate the lime. “I’ve had enough of you telling me what to do.”
I took my own drink and ushered her away from the bar to a corner where no one could hear us. Velvet curtains, a forest green the color of her eyes, brushed against my arm as I raised my hand to her face. She jerked away, not looking at me.
