Tomorrow's Shining Dream

by Naomi Rawlings

  “You did not.” The furrows in her brow disappeared, and that telltale glint of excitement was back in her eyes.

  “I think it’s safe to say they didn’t know about the crevice.”

  “I didn’t think preachers did things like kiss women before they were married.”

  Daniel smiled at the memory. “Sam was convinced they’d end up getting married. Said there was something in the Bible about two people who kissed that way needing to get hitched. Cain assured him people kiss all the time without getting married.”

  “Sounds like Cain. What ended up happening?”

  “I said something that got Cain upset with me.”

  She giggled, a light, dainty sound that he barely ever heard from practical Charlotte Westin. “Why doesn’t that surprise me? But that’s not what I meant. What happened with the kiss? Did your snickering interrupt the preacher?”

  “No.” Daniel rubbed the side of his jaw. “We ended up making a pact. Wes, Sam and I all swore we’d get married before we turned thirty, and Harrison and Cain swore they’d wait until after thirty to marry, if they ever did.”

  Wes and Charlotte’s mother had only been in the ground a couple of weeks, and Wes had been smarting over it. He could still hear Cain’s voice echoing through his mind, still see the hurt look on Wes’s face.

  “Kissing and love and marriage only make you stupid,” Cain sneered.

  Wes shot to his feet, his hands clenched into fists. “My ma wasn’t stupid, and neither is my pa.”

  “My parents aren’t stupid either.” Daniel stood up next to Wes. He wasn’t about to sit there and watch Cain sour the memories Wes had of his mother.

  Sam pushed himself up to stand, too, even though he didn’t have any parents. “I don’t think getting hitched is stupid. I think the stupid people are the ones who spend their lives all alone.”

  “So what happens if you don’t?” Charlotte’s voice broke through the memory.

  Daniel blinked. “What?”

  She looked at him with those large blue eyes that could drown a man in their depths. “What happens if one of you breaks your pact?”

  The back of his neck turned hot. “Uh, the others get to shave our heads.”

  “So that’s what you were talking about outside the barn.”

  “What?”

  “Aren’t you almost thirty? Isn’t your birthday right before Thanksgiving?”

  “Uh… yeah.”

  “You’re not even courting anyone. And if Cain gets to take a razor to your head, he’ll taunt you for the rest of your life.”

  He would, and Daniel could pretty much feel the cold scrape of the razor against his skull. “I’m not marrying someone just to keep my head from getting shaved. My hair will grow back.”

  She stared at him.

  “What?” he growled.

  “I’m trying to imagine what you’ll look like bald. Take your hat off.”

  “I’ll look ridiculous. I don’t need to take my hat off for you to know that. But I’d rather look ridiculous for a few months than spend the rest of my life married to a woman I don’t love.” He took a bite of his sandwich.

  “Married to someone you don’t love.” She looked down. “Of course that’s what you would say, coming from a family like yours.”

  “Charlotte.”

  She raised her face, but rather than meet his gaze, she stared over his shoulder. “I wonder what it’s like to be kissed by someone who loves you.”

  Daniel nearly choked on his sandwich.

  “I mean, I know what it’s like to be kissed—Robbie did that often enough—but he never actually… cared.”

  “Right.” Had it grown suddenly hot inside the crevice? Because he could almost swear the sun was beating down on his back, never mind the towering rock walls that surrounded them with shade. “Uh… reckon you’ll find that out when Andrew gets back from El Paso.”

  “Reckon so. If I can convince him I’m worth loving.” She bit the side of her lip, then gave her head a small shake. “Have you ever kissed a woman?”

  He nearly spit his bite of food out of his mouth. “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me. Have you ever kissed a woman? Someone you at least had feelings for, even if you didn’t love her all the way?”

  His gaze flitted down to Charlotte’s lips, which looked impossibly soft and moist.

  “A girl,” he muttered. “Not a woman, just a girl, and only once. But I didn’t love her, so it’s got nothing to do with what you’re talking about.”

  Charlotte’s eyes widened, and a teasing smile danced at the edges of her too-moist lips. “Did you like the kiss?”

  “Uh…” He shoved a finger in his collar and tugged.

  “Oh.” Her brow furrowed. “I suppose you couldn’t have liked it all that much, or you would have done it again.”

  “It was nice enough. I just didn’t realize your brother was sweet on the same girl when I kissed her.”

  “My brother was sweet on…?” Her eyes widened, and she sat back, her jaw dropping down to form a perfect O shape with her lips. “You kissed Abigail?”

  Hang it all. What had possessed him to give that bit of information away? “Like I said, I didn’t know he was sweet on her. He can be pretty tight-lipped.”

  “But you found out afterwards?”

  He rubbed the left side of his chin. “About the time his fist connected with my jaw.”

  Charlotte popped a grape into her mouth. “That must have been years ago.”

  “I was seventeen. Abigail and Wes were both sixteen.”

  Charlotte was right, there was something different about this little crevice, not because it allowed the world to pass by, but because anyone sitting in it obviously couldn’t remember how to keep their mouth shut.

  “So you kissed Abigail Ashton twelve years ago, but you haven’t kissed anyone since?” She plucked another grape off the stem.

  Why were they talking about this again?

  “How come?” she asked.

  “How come what?”

  “You haven’t kissed anyone since? Surely there’s been another woman somewhere along—”

  “No!” His panicked shout echoed through the canyon.

  She blinked at him. “Is that why you’re not married? You haven’t found anyone you might grow to love?”

  Boy howdy, how was he supposed to answer that when the woman he half loved was the person asking?

  “Are these the kinds of questions you intend to ask Andrew?” He forced the words out of his mouth in a rush. Anything to change the subject. “Because if you’re supposed to practice flirting with me, then I don’t think who I’ve kissed or why I’m not married matters.”

  She sat back. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I suppose I just… we should go.” She stood and started gathering the picnic items.

  “Charlotte.” He’d wanted to stop the questions, yes, but he hadn’t wanted her to put that invisible wall back up.

  “No, no. It’s terribly out of place for me to ask you such things.” She stared down at the food as she put the last of the biscuits in the basket. “I guess I forgot for a moment that you… that we…”

  “What?”

  She pressed her mouth shut and closed the lid on the basket.

  He stood and picked up the blanket. “I’m not married because I haven’t found the right woman yet.”

  But as soon as the words were out, he pressed his eyes shut. God, forgive me for the lie.

  Because he had found the woman he wanted to marry—he just couldn’t have her.

  Twelve years. That’s how long it had been since Daniel Harding kissed a woman.

  Charlotte ducked her head against the rain pelting the desert and urged Athena to move faster over the terrain. She couldn’t yet see the gate marking the entrance to the A Bar W, but it wasn’t much farther.

  Why hadn’t Daniel kissed anyone in all those years? He was handsome, kind, and polite. Sure, he could be a little serious and formidable, but
he could also smile and laugh and tease. He deserved a good woman.

  The thought of him getting his head shaved caused a sickening sensation to roil through her belly. He didn’t wear his hair long, but she was becoming rather fond of the light brown shade set against the tanned skin of his face.

  She shook her head to dislodge the image of Daniel and drew in a breath. Rain pinged off her hat and the scent of creosote filled her lungs. Whenever it rained, the desert bush let out a sweet, earthy aroma.

  You’re beautiful, Charlotte. The words Daniel had uttered in his office earlier that week flitted through her head as they seemed to do at least once an hour. Had he only been teaching her how to flirt when he’d said that? He’d seemed serious at the time, but he hadn’t mentioned anything about her looking beautiful today.

  Then again, when they talked about the preacher kissing Miss Emmaline, he’d looked at her lips so intently that her palms had grown sweaty. She’d nearly leaned forward and pressed her mouth to Daniel’s.

  Except she already knew what being kissed was like. What she didn’t know was how it felt to be kissed by a man who actually loved her, like Preacher Russel loved his wife.

  Kissing Daniel wouldn’t have told her what she wanted to know, yet she was convinced kissing him would feel different than kissing Robbie.

  That’s probably why Daniel hadn’t kissed anyone in so long. Everything about that man was honest and genuine, and he wasn’t about to go kissing a woman he couldn’t see himself marrying one day.

  So why had he kept staring at her lips? Did that mean…?

  No, she was getting ahead of herself. Again. With another man. Charlotte dug her heels into Athena’s side, urging the horse to fly faster across the desert while raindrops plunked against her hat and Athena’s slick coat of hair. She was supposed to have learned her lesson after last time. Just because a man showed her a bit of attention didn’t mean he heard wedding bells.

  But the picnic with him had felt so comfortable. So right. She hadn’t been nervous. She hadn’t spilled anything. She hadn’t even remembered they were supposed to practice flirting.

  The image of a new future splayed out in her mind, not one spent in some large San Antonio mansion, but one here on the desert. She could spend early mornings sitting on the porch with Daniel beside her, sipping coffee and watching the sun rise over the dusty blue mountains to their east. Lunches would be spent in the sheriff’s office—she’d bring a basket every day to share with Daniel and whatever deputies might be on duty. Evenings could be spent on horseback roaming the desert, perhaps taking a path to one of the mountain peaks where they could look out over the entire valley while the sun sank to the ground.

  She could almost feel a babe nestled in her arms, his tuft of hair the same soft brown color as Daniel’s. Almost taste the coffee they’d drink together every morning. Almost reach out and touch the portrait of the life that formed in her mind.

  No, no, no. She was getting ahead of herself once again. It was a curse she had. The only reason Daniel was spending time with her was because she’d begged him to do so…

  In order for her to be able to marry another man.

  Athena barreled through the gate to the ranch and up the rocky slope of the mountainside. When she pulled her horse to a stop in the yard, she expected to find the cowhands inside either the barn or the bunkhouse because of the rain. But a cluster of men stood just outside the barn, Wes and Pa among them.

  “Charlotte. There you are. Come see.” Her father turned to her, his eyes shining with a fondness he rarely showed when others were around. “Andrew sent you a gift.”

  “He did?” She surveyed the men, but no one stepped toward her bearing a present. All she could see was the head of a horse rising above the men’s cowboy hats.

  Pa shifted to make room for her beside the horse. And what a horse it was. The tan beast was only a few shades darker than the brownish-yellow desert surrounding them. Sculpted muscles corded its legs and ran along the sleek planes of his neck, and it stood taller than Ares. She might have purchased her Arabian mares directly from the Sultan of Arabia’s stables, but this stallion looked fit for a king himself to ride.

  “He’s stunning.” A thoroughbred. The horse wouldn’t be practical many places besides an English or Kentucky race track, but she had to admit Andrew’s favorite breed was beautiful to behold.

  “He’s yours.”

  She looked up. A skinny man with dark brown hair stepped forward. Much like her, rain dripped from his hat and plastered his shirt to his chest. “I beg your pardon?”

  “My name’s Lionel, and I work in Mr. Mortimer’s stable. He sent a telegram stating that I was to bring you Duke as a gift.”

  “A gift,” she repeated, unable to take her eyes from the horse.

  Part of her wanted to say it was too much. But as she stared at the magnificent beast before her, she couldn’t quite bring herself to refuse him.

  Wes stepped closer, then bent his head and spoke low into her ear. “Looks like you made more of an impression on Andrew than you thought.”

  “Indeed.” It also seemed like Andrew understood her far better than she’d realized.

  Why had she let herself start dreaming about a future with Daniel? Because he’d said a few kind things to her? Her heart was too fickle by half.

  Andrew Mortimer must already care a great deal for her if he was sending her a gift such as this, which meant she couldn’t let herself get swept away by Daniel’s kind words and tender blue gaze.

  11

  “What’s wrong with you?”

  Daniel looked up from his plate of untouched food to find Anna Mae staring down at him, one hand propped on her hip.

  When had she come into the office?

  “Well?” she asked. “You haven’t eaten a thing.”

  “Not hungry.” He shoved the plate toward her, scattering papers across the desk.

  “Not hungry for your favorite meal?” She placed her hands on the desk and leaned closer. “What’s going on?”

  I’m in love with your best friend, and I don’t know what to do about it. “Nothing.”

  She sank into the chair across the desk from him. “I don’t believe you.”

  Daniel pressed his lips together. Charlotte had left his office about an hour ago, but their usual flirting session had been rather unflirtatious. They’d met several times this week, and each time he’d expected her to say something about how much fun she’d had on their picnic, or maybe ask him more about why he hadn’t kissed a woman in twelve years.

  All she talked about was the horse Andrew had given her. How Duke had beaten Ares in a race yesterday evening, how Duke needed water more often than her Arabians, how she suddenly couldn’t wait for Athena to go into heat so she could breed the two horses.

  Daniel swallowed. How was he supposed to compete with a suitor who gave her a ten-thousand-dollar horse?

  Or maybe it was a twenty-thousand-dollar horse. He didn’t know.

  He’d tried telling her that she didn’t have to marry Andrew simply because he’d given her a horse, but it seemed as though she truly wanted to marry him. She’d even talked about the letter she wrote last night, and evidently this time she hadn’t had any problem finding things to tell Andrew.

  Daniel rubbed a hand over his face and let out a small groan. The only reason he’d agreed to spend time with Charlotte was to talk her out of marrying the city slicker, and he was failing. Badly.

  Yet his feelings for her grew stronger each time they met. Somewhere over the past weeks, he’d gone from being smitten with her to falling headlong in love.

  Dear God, what am I doing wrong? Why won’t you take these feelings for Charlotte away from me?

  “Is it the rustlers? Did they take more cattle? Or is it the court case at the end of the week? I hope the new judge gives Rutherford the ruling that scoundrel deserves.”

  Daniel blinked, bringing his sister into focus. His sister. Not Charlotte. “Um…” What ha
d they been talking about?

  “Or is it Cain?” She sighed. “I’m worried about him, too.”

  His head shot up. She was worried about Cain? As in worried about him… personally?

  “Don’t you think he should have been back by now? That rustling ring isn’t big enough to make a band of thirty rangers disappear, is it?”

  Daniel drew in a breath. He’d read too much into her first statement. Just because he was pining over a woman who wanted nothing to do with him didn’t mean his sister was pining over the man responsible for their father’s maiming. She was only as concerned as everyone else in town, and with good reason. The rangers had been gone for almost two weeks.

  “Their search probably took them deeper into Mexico than anyone expected—at least that’s the most likely explanation.” And the one that was most pleasant to think about.

  Footsteps sounded on the porch outside the office, then the door opened.

  “Hey, both of them are in here.” Sam’s voice filled the room. “No need to stop by the Hardings’, too.”

  “Sam!” Anna Mae rushed forward and gave him a hug before he could step fully into the room.

  Maybe one day she’d learn that she didn’t need to hug her friends every time she saw them, but Daniel wasn’t holding his breath.

  “How’s Ellie?” Anna Mae gushed. “Is she feeling okay? Any morning sickness?”

  “She’s fine.” Sam gave her a patronizing little pat on the back, then pried her arms off him.

  She moved straight to hug Wes, who was stuck behind where Sam had stopped in the doorway when Anna Mae had thrown herself at him. “I rode out to the ranch yesterday. Isn’t Charlotte’s new horse beautiful?”

  “What brings you two here?” Daniel asked before Charlotte and Wes started talking about that confounded horse. “Any trouble?”

  “Martin’s turning sixteen in a few weeks.” Sam tucked a thumb into his gun belt and leaned against the desk. “We usually don’t make that big of a deal about the young’uns birthdays, but we’re all right proud of how he tried helping with the rustlers last spring. The boy won’t stop nattering about becoming a lawman himself now. Anyway, Ellie was wondering if you two would come out to the house for a little shindig. She’ll make up a couple of her apple pies, and we’ll have ourselves a celebration.”