Like the fact that Danny was there for him.
Wanted him.
Would welcome anything that Mace wanted to do with him.
And because it was a dream, the very act of wanting made it happen. The dream had started with Mace admiring Danny from afar, but then, with no transition, Danny was in his arms, his lithe body molded against Mace’s. The beautiful man fit against him like he’d been made to, as if he were a piece of Mace that Mace had somehow managed to get through his entire life so far without realizing he was missing. At least, until now.
That buzzing excitement was inside him again... filling him... rippling across his skin everywhere they touched… making his heart hum with happiness.
Clothes melted away, and Danny arched against him.
He’d never touched another man like this, but it felt as natural as breathing. Letting his hands glide over Danny’s pale skin, learning the shape of his lightly toned body, discovering everything that had been hinted at every time Mace had looked-not-looked at the way Danny’s shirt clung to his slender chest, the sexy way his jeans rode low on his hips, the tight curve his ass made in them when he walked away… but Danny wasn’t walking away now. He was pressing himself against Mace, and the sensation wasn’t like anything he’d ever felt before.
It was so much fucking better.
Mace was hard—as hard as he’d been in Danny’s kitchen earlier—but this time he could actually do something about it. Could grind against the other man’s matching hardness and swallow the pretty sighs and delicious little gasps that the sweet friction forced out of Danny’s endlessly tempting mouth. Could thread his fingers through Danny’s hair and pull his head back to reach more of him, lick his way across Danny’s jaw and feel how the golden stubble dusting that impossibly soft skin rasped against his tongue, suck on the spot under Danny’s ear that had mesmerized him every time it betrayed the other man’s racing pulse.
Mace could suck it hard enough to mark him, to stake a claim, to finally make Danny his own.
And Mace wasn’t the only one touching. Danny’s hands were on him, too. Those expressive hands that always moved through the air when Danny talked, that made such beautiful things at the bakery, were now dancing across Mace’s skin, clutching and stroking and enflaming him until his entire world narrowed, everything that wasn’t Danny disappearing from his senses.
Mace wanted to taste all of Danny, to touch every inch, to rock against him, lose himself in the heat of his mouth and the soft-hardness of his body and the eager, needy sounds that told him Danny wanted him, too... welcomed his touch... was just as desperate to find a way to get closer as Mace was.
He slid his hands down Danny’s back, cupping his ass and lifting the other man against him. Danny’s legs locked around his waist, forcing their cocks together and making Mace groan with the intense pleasure of the unexpected feeling. Potting benches lined the transparent walls of the greenhouse, and Mace laid him down there... and then couldn’t look away. The sight of Danny was intoxicating, naked and willing and surrounded by a sea of color. Fragrant phlox and graceful daylilies and lush camellias, their pink blossoms revealing the truth in Mace’s heart.
Camellias meant I’m longing for you.
He ran a hand over Danny’s skin, exactly the way he’d seen Danny do with the velvety petals of the flowers they passed in the evenings, when he got to walk him home. Danny was a thousand times more intoxicating than those beauties, though, and as Mace played his fingers over pale nipples, teased out little whimpers of need, followed the soft trail of hair that led down to Danny’s cock and wrapped his hand around its hot length, he marveled at the similar-but-different feel of it in his hand and that he’d been blessed by the right to finally touch him.
He stroked Danny’s cock the way he would his own... but it wasn’t his own. It was better, more satisfying—more everything—to watch what his touch could do to Danny. To hear his breathy gasps and throaty moans and the sweet sound of him begging for more, begging for Mace, wanting everything he was dying to give him.
And then Danny was coming, his cock pulsing in Mace’s hand as his pretty mouth fell open with Mace’s name on his lips. He arched off the bench, spilling over Mace’s hand, his pleasure so intense that Mace felt it as his own and came too.
His release hit him in an unstoppable wave, his orgasm coming in endless, hot spurts that painted Danny’s body with Mace’s need for him, spelling out his desperate, impossible wish that this one, perfect moment could be real.
But no matter how good it felt, Mace couldn’t hide from the truth.
He knew he was dreaming, and the sinking regret that settled in his stomach at the realization was enough to force him awake, cock still pulsing and sheets sticky with his despair.
He stumbled out of bed, flicking on the light in his small bathroom and washing away the evidence of what he couldn’t have. Staring blindly at himself in the mirror when he was done as he fought with his own conflicting desires.
He wanted Danny to be happy, Danny deserved that, and Danny was happy with Gavin.
But Mace also wanted Danny to be his.
Eventually, he turned off the light, but he didn’t go back to his too-empty bed. Instead, he went to the window that overlooked the street, quiet at this time of night. Stood staring down at the dark windows of the bakery until lights finally flickered on inside.
Gavin.
It must be four a.m.
Maybe, someday, Danny would get tired of waiting at home alone while his boyfriend got up too early to pursue a dream that wasn’t Danny. Mace swallowed, ashamed even as he thought it. It wasn’t fair to Danny to hope for it. If he wanted Danny in his life—and he did—he was going to have to accept that it would just be as a friend.
And Mace could live with that.
He turned away from the window, repeating it out loud. “I can live with that.”
Maybe if he said it often enough, he might even start to believe it.
7
Danny
“Dammit.”
Danny dropped the decorating pen with a clatter, sweeping the cookies he’d just messed up off the prep table and into the trash bin. He took a breath, pinching the bridge of his nose as he breathed out slowly, and looked over at the clock. It was almost closing time, thank God. He was beyond ready for this endless day to be over. He’d skipped lunch—which also meant skipping the park, of course—and he knew that part of his crankiness was due to having only eaten cupcakes all day.
But only part.
God.
He’d really thought things were going to turn out differently with Mace.
The bell from the front door tinkled and he stifled a groan, managing to pull up something that he hoped would pass for a smile as he headed to the front to greet whatever customer had decided they desperately needed a sugar fix at eight o’clock at night. An effort which, thankfully, turned out to be unnecessary.
“What are you doing here this late?” he asked Gavin when his friend walked in. “Isn’t it past your bedtime?”
“Yeah, it really is, Danny. Where’s your phone?” Gavin answered with a scowl. “I got a message from the alarm company. I called here, but the store number sent me straight to voicemail, and apparently you’re ignoring yours now? Jesus, Danny, I thought something had happened.”
Gavin had come around the counter while he berated Danny, and he picked up the cordless phone from where it lay near the cash register, tapping the darkened nub that indicated a dead battery. Shit. Danny must have forgotten to put it back on the base.
“Sorry, Gav,” he said, instantly feeling guilty. “I hope it didn’t cost you any business. I’ll make it up to you.”
Gavin’s frown deepened, but then he just shook his head and sighed. “Don’t worry about it. But seriously, where’s your phone? I’ve been messaging you for twenty minutes.”
“Who knows,” Danny answered with a frustrated laugh. “You know I can’t keep track of anything. God. I haven’t e
ven seen it for a couple of days. And I must have screwed up the alarm. I was trying to reset it earlier because the orange light kept blinking.”
“I did the upgrade after the bookstore got robbed this past weekend, remember? It’s supposed to blink like that that now.”
Danny grimaced. “Sorry, I forgot.” He looked at the clock again. Five after eight. Thank God. Hopefully that meant there wasn’t anything else he could mess up before going home. He went to the front and flipped the sign to “closed,” locking the front door.
“What’s this?” Gavin asked from behind him. Danny turned to see his friend looking into the trash bin, his brow crinkled as he took note of the pile of broken cookies.
“Sorry,” Danny repeated for what felt like the millionth time since the other man had walked in. “I messed up the order for that bridal shower. It’s not due to go out until later in the week, though, so I’ll take care of it tomorrow. You can take the cost of the cookies out of my check.”
He slumped back against the wall, letting his head fall back with a thump and closing his eyes. He probably shouldn’t even have come in today since he couldn’t seem to get his head on straight, but other than the kid who covered the front counter in the afternoons, Delicious was just Danny and Gavin. Which meant he was going to have to get it together. Letting his bruised feelings affect Gavin’s business wasn’t fair.
Gav squeezed his shoulder, making Danny squeak in surprise as his eyes snapped open. He hadn’t even heard his friend cross the room. God, he really hadn’t slept well the night before, and now he just wanted to go home and wallow in self-pity with a pint of Häagen Dazs and his girls.
How unfair was it that he hadn’t been born a princess? Every last one of them was guaranteed a Prince Charming, a happily-ever-after, and an adorable, furry bestie who sang to them. It was like, Disney law.
“Don’t be an ass, Danny,” Gavin said, who neither furry nor inclined to sing to him but was still… well, still pretty great to have around. Even if Ma—well, if no one else was.
“Sorry,” Danny said, sighing.
“I care about you, not the cost of a few cookies,” Gavin reminded him, since he actually was the best friend Danny could ever hope to have. “Please tell me what’s wrong.”
Everything.
“Just because you wish for something doesn’t make it true.”
“What?” Gav asked, cocking his head to the side and furrowing his brow. “That doesn’t sound like one of your standard happily-ever-after quotes.”
“It’s Tiana,” Danny said, feeling too tired to give Gavin a hard time for his failure to recognize the eternal wisdom of Disney. “Princess and the Frog.”
“Now you’re scaring me,” Gav said, his tone of voice proving he was only half kidding. “That’s about the most depressing princess quote you’ve ever spouted. Who are you and where’s my best friend?”
Danny sighed again. “I think I’ve been listening to the wrong princesses, Gav.”
“What happened?”
“Nothing.”
Gavin folded his arms across his chest, staring him down. “Don’t lie.”
Danny rolled his eyes. Well, tried to. They were distressingly moist, though, so he wasn’t sure he managed it. “No, I meant that ‘nothing’ was what happened.” He swiped at his cheeks before anything spilled out, admitting, “And I’m an idiot, because I really, really thought something was going to.”
Gavin’s eyes widened. “Oh my God. Please tell me you didn’t do the UPS guy.”
“Tad?” Danny laughed despite himself, although it came out sounding suspiciously like something else. “At least he wants me. But ew. Never.”
Gav frowned, his eyes soft even though his words came out firm. “Don’t make me pull it out of you. Spill, Danny. What happened?”
Danny hadn’t told his best friend about Mace yet, and he wasn’t entirely sure why. Gavin was usually the first to hear every detail of the drama that passed for Danny’s love life, but the thing with Mace was different.
Or it had felt like it was, at least.
He’d wanted it to be… so badly that he’d had the irrational conviction that if he’d said anything, if he’d put his ridiculous, starry-eyed hopes into words, it might have jinxed whatever had been happening with Mace. Might have made it all disappear, as surely as his girl Cindy’s fancy carriage and dress had when the clock had struck midnight.
It was the same hesitation that had held him back from asking Mace the million questions churning inside him over the last few weeks, all of which were variations on the are-you-gay-and-oh-my-fucking-God-please-say-you’re-really-this-wonderful theme. But no matter how much he’d wanted to know, he just hadn’t been able to bring himself to do it before because, despite everything he’d wanted to read into what may or may not have been happening between them, Danny hadn’t been at all confident that the answer would be yes. And real or not—no matter how pathetic it made him—he’d wanted to hold onto the dream for just a little bit longer.
He really should have known better.
“Danny?” Gavin prompted, still waiting for an explanation.
“I don’t know, Gav,” Danny said, his shoulders slumping. “Have you ever met anyone who made you feel like you were…”
Everything.
“Were what?” Gavin asked when Danny’s voice trailed off. And then, with a laugh, he added, “Jesus, whatever it is, I’m pretty sure the answer is no, I haven’t. But I think I’d like to, if the look on your face is anything to go by.”
Danny’s lips tipped up at the raw envy under his friend’s teasing tone... even though Gav’s comment kind of made him want to cry again, too. God, why hadn’t he just left things alone the night before? The truth was, no matter how desperately pathetic it made him sound, he would rather have kept wondering if it would have meant keeping Mace around a little longer.
He bit his lip, trying to figure out where to start. “I met a guy.”
Gav snorted, grinning. “Obviously.”
Danny rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help smiling back despite himself. They both knew that Gavin had heard that line enough times. Usually—well, always—followed by something cringeworthy.
God, he really was a drama queen, wasn’t he?
“This one was different, though,” he said. “Whenever we were together it was like... it felt like he didn’t want to be anywhere else, you know?”
“But…?”
Danny let his head fall against the wall again, closing his eyes. “But I fucked it up. God, Gav, I don’t even know if he’s gay. I mean, I kind of can’t imagine a straight guy putting up with me the way he does, but… he doesn’t ever touch me, doesn’t try anything.”
Although the night before, Danny had really, honestly thought that was going to change for a moment there. It had given him courage. Mace had said yes to dinner. He’d come up to the rainbow explosion that was Danny’s apartment and hadn’t run away screaming. He’d stood so close and looked at Danny like he couldn’t look away and made Danny think, just for a moment, that all his dreams were about to come true.
Danny really, really should have known better. H should have stuck with not asking. Not pushing. Then, maybe Mace wouldn’t have run away.
“A guy not trying to get in your pants right away doesn’t necessarily mean he’s not into you,” Gavin said. “Sometimes, it might mean he’s into you more. Have you guys been… dating?”
Danny sighed, opening his eyes. “No.”
...right? Although whatever they had been doing, Danny had looked forward to it more than any date he’d been on in… well, ever.
“He seems perfectly content to just like, be with me,” he tried to explain to Gavin. “He never makes a move, but he’s so…”
“He’s so… what?” Gavin asked when Danny gave a helpless shrug, not sure how to describe the flutters and wonderfulness of Mace waiting for him after work every night. Of seeing him at the park during his lunch breaks. Of the way Danny was p
retty sure he could read Mace’s face now even when Mace didn’t let anything show on it. And God. When he did let something show? When oen of those rare, hard-won smiles appeared like an unexpected gift, taking Danny’s breath—
There weren’t words for that. Not even from the princesses. Having Mace in his life was color and joy and hope and a rollercoaster of fluttering nerves, every single day.
Danny’s fingers twitched. Maybe if he could paint it, Gavin would understand.
Gavin grinned. “So, I take it he’s hot? Is that what you’re trying to say?”
Danny groaned. Um, yeah. Mace was definitely hot, too. Although really, “hot” didn’t begin to do Mace justice, in his completely unbiased opinion.
“He is,” Danny admitted, ignoring Gavin’s knowing smirk and trying for words anyway. “But God, it’s more than just that. He’s protective, and sweet, and even though he’s really quiet, when he does say something it’s usually funny or interesting or really smart. And he pays attention to me—”
Gavin cut him off with an amused snort.
“Shut up,” Danny said, smacking him and laughing despite himself. So he liked attention, was that really such a crime?
“So let me get this straight,” Gav said, batting away Danny’s hand and raising an eyebrow. “You’ve met this amazing guy who treats you like a princess and it’s got you so depressed that it’s made you forget the alarm code and start throwing cookies away…?”
Danny sighed, his moment of good cheer evaporating. “Remember how I said he never touches me? Well, last night I thought he finally wanted to. He was looking at me like he did, at least. Like he wanted… like he was going to… God, Gav, I really thought he—”
Wanted me.
Danny’s throat closed up, and he had to look away from the flash of pity that crossed his best friend’s face when he couldn’t get the words out.
“Danny, if you don’t know where you stand with this guy, why don’t you just ask him?” Gavin said softly. His lips tipped up at the corners. “Or you could even make a move of your own, princess. He doesn’t have to go first.”
The Delicious Series: The First Volume Page 9
