by Eliza Ellis
“I’m paying attention,” he breathed.
Oh, why did he have to sound so overcome? Keke blinked rapidly a few times to clear her mind of the hurricane-like fog moving in at warp speed. Great. Now she was thinking like a nerd. “Good. Good. When you go to kiss her, you don’t go all the way. Come until you’re a breath away. Allow her to meet you in the kiss. Got it?”
He was already leaning in, nodding.
Keke’s eyelids felt terribly heavy. But she was too alert to sleep. Warm breath brushed her cheeks.
“Keighly…”
A gentle squeeze at her hips and she was fully pressed against his torso. She parted her lips and angled up on her toes.
It was the sweetest beginning to a kiss she’d ever experienced. And she wasn’t a stranger to kissing, but not so experienced that she could win a French kissing contest or anything silly like that.
Pete’s warm mouth covered hers and then moved slowly, smoothly, taking in her top lip before moving to taste her bottom lip. His beard felt smooth against her skin, and held a hint of citrus fragrance.
After regaining some sense of reality, Keke moved her lips around his, telling herself she was teaching him the art of exploration, but really she was going on her own adventure. His arms came fully around her back. Then only one of her feet remained on the ground.
When she heard the soft sound of her moan, her senses came back like a kick to the shin. Trying not to ruin the experience by shoving him away—no way did she want to land in the fire pit—she pulled back as gently as she could and stepped out of his embrace.
Uh-oh. I kissed him. She swallowed hard. She wasn’t supposed to, but when their bodies fused and he whispered her name…
Pete stood there, chest rising and falling rapidly, eyes wide with both expectation and dread. She had to tell him. This whole lesson-thing had a purpose.
“Um…”
“It wasn’t good?” he whispered.
Keke cleared her throat and awkwardly chuckled. “Oh, it was…very good. You were right.” She nodded and kept nodding because she didn’t know what else to do.
“About what?”
She smiled. He was so cute. “You can definitely manage.”
“Oh.” He blushed to his roots and reached for his garbage bag. “Well, thank you.” His eyes came back to hers. “Really. I enjoyed it.”
“Your first, right?”
He nodded.
“Well, you should always enjoy your first. So…I’m glad I could do that for you.”
Bertie’s words last night came back with full force. His mother was dying. What could Keke do? She couldn’t comfort him without telling him the truth. But she could make sure that he was happy. Happier than he’d ever been in his life.
Even if that meant matching him with someone else.
Because he didn’t want her. He’d stopped dead in his tracks when he met Lea. To Pete, Keke would be the girl who used to tease him to tears. Keke’s eyes burned.
She went back to scraping the grill. “Lea is going to melt in your arms,” she muttered.
“Yeah? I guess…”
“I don’t understand you,” she said, miffed. “I thought you liked her. You do want to eventually get a girlfriend, right?”
“I do,” he rushed to say. “I do. Thank you.”
He kept his head down, working to clear the debris and make the site ready for the children tomorrow.
Keke stared at him for a few moments then continued her work in silence. There was so much left unsaid, but Keke had made a promise. Not only about his mother, but also about how she could never fall for Peter.
And she never broke her word.
Except for that kiss…
* * *
Bertie walked away as quickly as her short legs could take her. Anger burned in her heart and stung the back of her eyes. She wiped away the onslaught of tears that poured down her cheeks. Friendship meant nothing to Keke. Nothing! What was their number one rule?
All she asked was that Keke leave him alone. For one week. She couldn’t keep her hands off him for one week?
And now she was kissing Peter. She was going to ruin everything.
Bertie sputtered, a profound sense of loneliness overwhelming her. For so long, she’d been carrying this burden of her mother’s illness alone, and she thought she had an ally in her best friend. Finally, someone who understood what she was going through and could help.
She would never trust anyone again.
Especially not her so-called best friend.
There was only one thing she could do: make sure Peter never wanted to see Keke again.
Chapter 15
K at gave her sister a hug at her door. “I’m so thankful you were able to get the night off and stay with me! We’re going to have a lot of fun.”
“Oh, it was no trouble, believe me.”
Keke squeezed her sister back and stepped into the small Cape Cod-style home, grateful for her sister’s company.
She didn’t have much trouble getting the night off because Bertie seemed only too pleased to let her leave, barely looking her in the eye when Keke had asked if she could visit her sister for the night. Bertie waved a dismissive hand and walked off mid-ask. Keke thought it was odd at the time, but she didn’t want to question her friend. She was dealing with enough already and probably wasn’t in the mood for one more thing.
After kissing Pete, Keke felt like she was suffocating from guilt. She tried her best to avoid Pete for the rest of the day, even rescheduling some of her group’s events so she wouldn’t have to pass him and his contingent of kids on any of the trails or have the same activities.
It was juvenile, she knew, but how else was she supposed to keep things platonic? Keeping her eyes off him wasn’t enough anymore. Now she felt his presence whenever he was near, and it set her nerves on edge.
In a good way.
Not good. She had promised Bertie, and it was too complicated for her life right now. All she had to do was focus on getting through this week and prepare for her audition. Actually, she should’ve been prepping for it before now with only a few days left. She couldn’t get behind anymore. Maybe she could get in a few exercises tonight.
“Come in, come in.”
“Kat, this place is adorable.” Keke walked around the small living space near the entryway, gliding her fingers over the sleek, modern gray couch, eyeing a coffee table with an antique lamp, and oohing and ahing over the gorgeous wooden mantle that graced the fireplace. “Rustic and contemporary. It’s perfect.”
“I know it’s not much, but it’s home.”
“I can’t believe you’re not living with Mom.” Keke chuckled. “I thought for sure you were going to stay with her, but I’m glad you have your own place. Your style is amazing, and I’m totally going to have you decorate my place when you come out to visit.”
Kat smiled. “Done. I’ll send you an invoice for the deposit.” Keke stuck her tongue out at her older sister. “I briefly thought about moving back in after Dad passed away. I might still do it.”
Keke gave her a curious look. “And give up this cute place? Why?”
Kat responded with a patient smile. “Because of Mom. I wasn’t sure she’d be all right alone. She hasn’t been on her own in a long time. It’s good that she is, and she wants it that way.”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t she be on her own?” Keke grumbled. “I’d be relieved if I were her. Probably dance on the man’s grave at least once a week.”
“Keke…” Kat breathed a warning. “That’s unkind and…bitter.”
Keke folded her arms and let the full weight of her body land hard in the armchair. “Of course I’m bitter. You’re not because you have the sweetest disposition, but he was a horrible father, a lousy husband, and I’m glad he’s gone. Why am I the only person who sees this as a benefit?”
A staring contest lasted for a solid minute, with neither of them speaking. Kat’s eyes were full of sadness and a twinge of judgment. Keke rais
ed her chin and arched a brow. Kat conceded defeat with a sigh. “I have some hot water on the stove. Do you want some tea?”
“Tea would be fine, thank you,” Keke said stiffly. Her sister disappeared into the kitchen. “Did you buy it?” Keke called out to her.
“Buy what?”
“This house, silly.”
“No.” Kat came back into the living room by way of the dining area. She dunked the tea bag into the water. “I’m renting. Can’t afford to buy just yet.”
“I definitely can’t buy a place in California until I land a lot of parts. It’s so expensive out there. Don’t know how people can afford to live.”
“You’re going to be one of them, so you’ll find out soon enough. Be careful about the roommates. You don’t want to live with sickos.” Kat handed her the hot mug.
Not only was Kat as sweet as the cakes she baked, she was also the most paranoid. “I know a couple of people from college. We were all in the same drama classes.” Kat smelled the relaxing scent of white tea and pomegranate. She took a sip, allowing the warmth to further decrease her anxiety level. “We’re going to bunk together.”
“Oh! That sounds like a lot of fun.” Kat sat on the sofa. “You and your friends trying to make it in L.A. Living your dreams…or pursuing them. Wasn’t that a Broadway play or something?”
Keke ignored the question and maintained eye contact with her teasing sister. “Like you should? Pursue your dreams, I mean.”
Kat waved a hand. “We don’t need to talk about me. This is about you! Are you sure you’re okay with everything? With the move? You look a little stressed.”
“It’s the kids,” Keke said quickly. “Always yelling, running around. Rug rats. Never going to have any myself.”
Kat smiled. “You say that today, but you’re only twenty-two. Of course you don’t want kids. Give it a few years after you’re living in your California mansion by the Pacific Ocean and you have a huge backyard and no rug rats to run around in it.” She winked. “And you’ve met and married the guy of your dreams.”
Keke coughed and beat her chest with a fist. “Went down the wrong pipe,” she said, blaming the tea.
“You’re going to want a couple of mini-mes to carry on the dynasty the two of you will build.”
Keke set the cup down on a saucer and leaned back in the chair. She let her eyes wander around the room, ignoring her sister’s perceptive gaze.
A dynasty, huh? That sounded incredibly far off in the future. She couldn’t fathom marrying any time soon let alone have kids. She could dance for the next fifteen years, if she took really good care of her body.
That meant no kids.
“Who is he?” Kat asked bluntly.
“Hmm?” Keke played with a curly strand of hair she left dangling to one side of her face. Kat was also a mind reader.
“Don’t play coy. It’s not cute. Who’s the guy?”
Keke sighed. “There is no guy, at least…there can’t be one.”
“Why? Is it because you’re moving?”
“Not exactly, but that’s a big part of it.”
Kat got a dreamy, romantic look in her eyes. The kind that told Keke she was about to step through the looking glass into the world of Jane Austen.
“Oh, I dunno,” Kat said in a hopeful voice. “I think if it’s meant to be, then the two of you will find a way.”
“What if it shouldn’t be meant to be?”
Kat’s brows smashed together. “Huh? Why shouldn’t it be?”
Because it would literally break her best friend’s heart to be lied to, and Keke didn’t want to be the reason Pete didn’t pursue his dream of being an app developer—or going to college. Whichever one he would finally decide to do.
“Maybe the people aren’t right for each other, no matter how much they may want it,” Keke said absentmindedly. Oops. She wasn’t supposed to let that slip.
Kat smiled knowingly, and Keke braced herself for another inspirationally romantic sentence. “Well, all I know is that if it’ll be, it’ll be. You just have to trust fate and let yourself be open to the idea. Don’t close your heart, Keke.”
“You sound like a commercial I’ve seen…” Keke preferred to ignore her heart. It wouldn’t serve her well. She needed her brains and her talent to get anywhere in life. Having a heart meant it could be broken. And that would be soul-crushing. Her father had already tried sucking it out of her, and he didn’t succeed.
After a life with Mr. Kaye and his downright emotionally abusive parenting style, Keke preferred to be as cool and aloof as she possibly could. She never could win her father’s approval. Now that he was dead, she told herself she didn’t need it.
Validation was too close to being a heart issue, involving feelings of acceptance. A chance to be rejected. Her father rejected her and her goals. Said dancing was practically stripping, and as the prettiest of the Kaye sisters, she had a greater propensity to sexualize herself. That pronouncement over Keke’s life made her vomit.
It also killed any trust she’d have in men.
Until Petey.
The doorbell rang.
“She’s here!” Kat jumped up and went to the door.
Who? Their sister Kori was supposed to be halfway across the world right now. Keke couldn’t wait to see—
Mom walked in, her face brightening when her eyes landed on Keke. “Oh, Keighly! It’s so good to see you.”
Keke’s attitude immediately soured. Her mother quickly embraced Keke, who fought to keep her arms down by her sides. Mom didn’t seem to notice. Keke shot her sister a “what gives?” look over their mother’s shoulder.
“I invited her here tonight so the two of you could catch up. I know you’ve been busy at camp, Keke, and I didn’t want Mom to miss you before you went to California.”
“California?” Her mother’s voice rose a few octaves. “Oh, honey! That’s amazing.” She shook Keke’s shoulders and then kissed her cheek. “I’m so happy for you! Tell me all about it.”
Keke looked at her mother like she was crazy. What had happened to the woman who could barely utter more than “obey your father”? Who always looked sullen and slightly unkempt? The woman before her had on too much blush and eye shadow, her hair done in curls that hung around her shoulders, and Keke caught the sheen of fresh polish on her nails.
This woman was not her mother.
“Mom?” Keke breathed.
“Yes? I’m right here, honey.” She laughed and looped her arm with Keke. “Come sit on the couch. Do you like your sister’s place? It’s just the loveliest. I practically had to kick her out of the house.” She laughed heartily. “I’m so proud of her!” She reached out and approvingly shook Kat’s arm.
“Uh, I haven’t been out of the living room, but it definitely suits her.”
“You haven’t given her the tour?” Disappointment aged Mary’s face by about ten years. Even with all the makeup on, she couldn’t hide the premature aging living with Gregory Kaye had caused. She was still in her fifties.
“I was going to,” Kat said. “Do you want some tea, Mom? The water is still hot. Or we could eat now, if you’re hungry.”
“No, no. Let’s have the tour and then eat. I’ll have tea with dessert.”
It was all clear to Keke. The setup. Kat called Mom over for dinner when she knew her younger sister was showing up. Well played.
“Kat told me you were staying the night,” Mary said as she and Keke followed Kat up the stairs to the second floor. “You should come stay with me when you have a free night.”
“I don’t, actually,” Keke said quickly. “I could barely get this one. I needed a quick break, is all.”
“After camp, then? Could you stay the last night before you fly out to California? When do you leave?”
Keke hesitated, not wishing to give her mother any details. She didn’t know who this new woman was, although the urge to accept her was strong. “By the end of the week. I was going to fly out Friday evening because my au
dition is on Monday. I haven’t practiced.”
Her mother’s face fell. A dart of guilt hit Keke square in the stomach. Her mother had sins to atone for. Following a YouTube makeup tutorial and getting a new hairstyle didn’t suddenly make everything okay.
Not for Keke.
Kat seemed to take everything in stride, and after what her sister pulled, Keke couldn’t trust her either.
They walked into one of the two bedrooms on the floor. It was a lovely guest room with a bed, nightstand, and a large overstuffed chair in the corner Keke wanted to curl up in after snatching the floral quilt off the bed. Exhaustion started to take its toll on her, and more than dinner, she needed rest. Rest and recuperation were critical to dancers.
“Monday is so soon. What kind of audition?”
“Dance and acting.”
“That sounds nice. I’d love to see your senior performance, if you have the chance.”
Keke caught Kat’s wavering gaze. “I told her about it,” Kat confessed. “Said you received the highest marks out of all the senior dancers in the department.”
Mary squeezed Keke in her arms. Keke had never known her mother to hug her this much in a month.
“That’s quite an accomplishment. I’m so, so proud of you. Your dreams are finally coming true.”
“Yeah, no thanks to—”
“Dinner?” Kat interrupted. “The other room is mine and a bathroom is in the middle of the hall. No big deal. You’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.” She led the way out and all three women descended the stairs.
Once seated at the dinner table, Keke took the opportunity to pour herself some wine. Thank goodness her sister had sense enough to buy alcohol. Keke rarely drank, due to her strict diet, but tonight she would need it.
“Keke, I’ve been trying to get Kat to—”
“No, Mom.” Kat chuckled nervously. “We’re not talking about what I should do. I’m very happy at the bakery.”
“I’m happy you’re there too,” Keke offered. “I’m in love with those mini cupcakes.”
