by KB Winters
“I’m not.”
He folded his arms and arched a dark brow at me as if he didn’t believe me. “Rufus’ ribeye?”
“Was put in five minutes ago, and last I checked it took longer than five minutes to grill up a two-inch-thick ribeye.”
Instead of continuing to argue when I wasn’t in the mood, I turned towards the chef. “Hey Sean, how’s that ribeye coming along?”
He grunted at the question as I knew he would. “Six minutes on each side for rare. You know that.”
“I do,” I said with a satisfied smile aimed right at Jasper. I didn’t wait for another sign of victory. I grabbed a nachos platter, three burger plates, and a bowl of colcannon and left the kitchen.
I ran nonstop until the last customer staggered out of Midnight Mass and into a car idling at the curb. Thank fucking shit, this night was finally over. That was the only thought in my mind as back-to-back yawns made my jaws crack. A quick look at the time, and I knew I could finish up in fifteen minutes and be curled up in my bed in thirty.
A girl had to have goals.
Seventeen minutes later, I had my purse slung over my shoulder, my sneakers back on my feet, and my denim jacket tied around my waist as I strode out into the parking lot where Hulu waited in the first spot for me. His car was parked beside Jasper’s beautiful all-white Maybach with white leather interior.
I was so focused on that gleaming white beacon of wealth and luxury that I didn’t notice the giant beast of a man headed straight for me. The sight of Bobby, one of my sometimes fuck buddies and a full-time Marine, brought me up short. He flashed that wicked dimpled smile and licked his lips, a move that usually reminded me of his tongue flicking over my clit. Tonight, he blocked my path forward.
“Hey there, sweet thang.”
I groaned, and with no energy to stop myself, rolled my eyes too. “Not now, Bobby. I’m not feeling well, and I’m exhausted.”
“But, babe,” he pleaded, “I came all this way just for you. Six months is a long damn time to go without seeing my best girl.”
“Your Vegas girl, you mean, don’t you?” He blushed at having been caught, but we didn’t have a normal relationship. He didn’t owe me shit, and I owed him the same, but I was too tired to play the game right now.
“Look, Bobby, I’m glad you made it back from your last mission safe and sound, but I feel like shit right now. Why don’t you head on over to Emerald Isle or Black Stallion and enjoy your leave because I’m no fun tonight.”
And I probably wouldn’t be for a long while, at least nine months, maybe eighteen years.
“Bummer,” he said as his massive shoulders fell in disappointment. “Anything I can say to change your mind?”
Hulu was already out of the driver’s seat and headed in our direction, murder in his dark eyes, when I shook my head. “You know if I could power through it for anyone, it would be you, honey.”
“I know, babe. I just hate to see you feeling like shit.” He stepped in close and brushed a kiss against my cheek. “I’ll check in with you in a few days. Take care, yeah?”
I nodded and let out a long, slow sigh. Why couldn’t I have fallen for a guy like Bobby? He was a big oaf of a man, just like Jasper. Beautiful and deadly, but he was a nice guy, a good guy who probably wouldn’t leave me heartbroken.
“You too. And I am really glad to see you back on American soil.”
“Same, babe.” With a kiss to my forehead, Bobby’s long legs ate up the path to his bright orange hummer. He jumped inside the machine with ease, a double tap on the horn signaling his departure as I made my way to Hulu, feeling even more exhausted after that short exchange.
Hulu flashed a wide grin as he held the back door open. “That was a big motherfucker,” he said, hoping to dig for more information.
“That big motherfucker is Bobby, a friend on leave from the Marines.”
“Just a friend, huh?” Hulu’s knowing look in the rearview mirror put a smile on my lips, and I shrugged.
“That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.” I knew what all the guys thought of me, and I kept a level of distance between us, so they didn’t get too familiar.
“Strange.” Hulu started the engine and pulled out of the parking spot, driving carefully as he made his way to the hotel. “I always thought you had a thing for Jasper.”
I sucked in a sharp breath at his words, his all-seeing gaze. “Yeah, well. We’re all entitled to be stupid about one person in our lives. That’s the rule, isn’t it?”
“Is it? I guess I haven’t found that woman for me yet.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at his over-confident tone. “A guy like you will definitely find her. And you will be extra stupid over her, I’m sure.”
“Thanks?” Hulu’s deep rumbling laughter put me at ease as I sank into the leather seat.
“Anytime. But hey, don’t say anything to Jasper, yeah?” The last thing I needed was for anyone to mention to him that I might be feeling anything other than cock hungry. Things were complicated enough with the baby, and I hadn’t even figured out if or when I would let him in on that little fact. I didn’t need the drama of my heart’s greatest desire added to the mix.
“Your secret is safe with me,” Hulu assured me, locking his lips and tossing the key out the window. “But you’re such a badass, I’m surprised you haven’t tried to shoot your shot yet.”
I shrugged and stared out at the starry sky as we rolled through traffic. “It would be pointless. A guy like that with a girl like me? Never gonna happen. I mean, I love a good nineties rom-com as much as the next girl, but that’s not real life.”
“Maybe not, but every fucking day around the world, people fall in love, and you know what? It surprises them. Terry and Kat finally got together after years of pretending they hated one another. Best friend’s little sister, that’s like a whole romance subgenre, ain’t it?”
I laughed and shook my head. “You read romance, Hulu?”
“No, but I love women, and they love romance.”
“That’s because we love the fantasy. It’s not real, just a way to get lost in a happy ending for a little while. The problem comes when you start to believe that the big bad alpha is going to wake up one day and realize you’re the girl of his dreams, and you’ve been there all along.”
Even saying the words sarcastically made my heart stand up and take notice. It was what I wanted most, deep down in my heart of hearts. But that didn’t make it real, and that sure as shit didn’t improve my chances of it becoming a reality.
“Bullshit,” Hulu spat the word at me, glancing at me in the rearview mirror at a red light. “People fall in love all the damn time; with people they thought didn’t see them or didn’t think of them that way. Know what I think? You’re scared.”
Hell yeah, I was scared. The last man I trusted betrayed me in a way I didn’t even know was possible. Now, I felt a little sick whenever I heard a doorknob twist. Trust wasn’t easily earned, and as much as I loved Jasper, I wasn’t all that sure I trusted him either.
“Maybe I am, but scared people are diligent and diligent people stay alive.”
A knowing expression flashed on Hulu’s face, but he didn’t comment, just gave the nod of those who had a shared experience of hell. He didn’t know what my particular hell was, and I didn’t know his, but we had both been there, survived it, and carried our scars as souvenirs.
“That they do.”
I knew I had a lot to think about where Jasper was concerned, mainly if I would tell him that his baby was growing inside of me.
He wouldn’t believe me at first, would threaten me against blackmail or extortion. When the truth became evident, he might give me what I wanted most—his love, his heart—but it wouldn’t only be for show.
Obligation.
That was the last thing I wanted. I wanted Jasper with everything in me, but only if he wanted me too. Love was the only thing worth the expectations that came with being an Ashby or being married to a
n Ashby. I wasn’t sure I could handle being an Ashby if Jasper didn’t love me, no matter how badly I wanted a family for my baby.
But I knew one thing. I needed to figure my shit out.
The baby wouldn’t stop growing just because I hadn’t mustered up the courage to tell Jasper the truth. Life would be too fucking simple and enjoyable if it did.
Chapter Thirteen
Jasper
“Yo, Jas.” Terry stood just inside my office at Midnight Mass with a shit-eating grin on his face. “Got a minute?”
Hell no, I didn’t have a minute, but Terry was my best friend. My brother-in-law. The man who always had my fucking back. So I buried my frustration and said, “Sure. What’s up?”
“Some young fucks have been hanging around in the Green Zone, threatening the business owners who refuse to pay for their so-called protection. I’ve busted a few skulls on my own, just to prove a point, but you know how these young shits are. They’re gonna need your particular brand of charm.”
Terry flashed a wide smile, the same one he wore whenever some shit was about to go down.
I pushed away from my desk with a knowing smile. “Aren’t you too old to get such a thrill out of fucking people up?”
“Fuck no, and neither are you. This is an excellent stress reliever, and with all the shit on your plate, I know you could use something to take away the stress.”
At Terry’s words, my shoulders relaxed because he was right. Of course, he was right. Terry was my best fucking friend, the person who knew me best in the whole world. Even better than my family.
“Thank fuck,” I growled and undid the first button of my shirt. “Between my pain in the ass siblings—your wife included—and Sadie being stubborn as usual, I am losing my fucking mind. I could definitely do with some stress release.”
Terry’s smile widened as he clapped me on the back and followed me out of the office. “That’s what I’m talking about.”
I barked as we walked in long, purposeful strides out of Midnight Mass, “Mo, keep an eye on things,” and then we made our way to the car and off to the Green Zone. “I want to talk to some of the business owners first.”
Terry parked at Lucky Lopez, and we walked the main drag, side-by-side, talking to everyone from the old dude who owned the corner store, the lady who worked at the laundromat, and the new drug store owner. Their stories were all the same. A group of young punks would come into their place of business, wreck shit, and then demand money to keep other motherfuckers from coming in to wreck shit.
I listened, growing angrier by the moment because I knew this shit was only happening because of the so-far unsuccessful attempt on Sadie’s life. “You get any names from these assholes?”
“No, sir. But they were all wearing leather vests like bikers do, you know? The word Psychos written on the back with a skull that looks fucking nuts.”
Fucking Psycho bike club. “Thanks. If they come around again, give Terry a call.” I nodded at Terry, and he slid a card to the old man behind the pharmacy counter.
“Anytime day or night. Got it?”
The old dude nodded. “Thank you so much.” The old man’s gratitude made me uneasy, his and all the other business owners we spoke to.
“We’re all praying for a speedy recovery for your mama.”
I nodded and left the gas station with Terry at my heels. “Fucking bikers,” I growled.
“The Psychos are a small MC made up of a bunch of twenty-somethings looking to make a name for themselves. Formed in Henderson so they know fuck all about how things are run here.”
I smiled over my shoulder. “Then let’s show them.”
It took less than ten minutes to track them down to a rundown warehouse a few miles outside the Green Zone. It used to be Black Jacks’ property, which was pretty fucking ironic given what happened to those shit stains. The metal door with the chipped paint was wide open, inviting in friend and foe alike. It was their dumb fucking luck that today, a foe came knocking.
I banged on the door with my fist, startling all five Psychos from their round table chat.
A bearded ginger stood up, about a head taller than his buddies and twice as wide. “Who the fuck are you?”
“Did someone give you dumb fucks the impression that the Green Zone was public property?”
“I said, who the fuck are you? Don’t make me ask again.”
I smiled at the kid. I would’ve admired his bravado if he had anything other than size to back it up. “I guess you didn’t hear my question.”
“I don’t give a fuck who you are, old man. This is my MC and my clubhouse.”
The big fucker marched over to me, towering damn near a head over me, breathing hard enough to let me know he was big but not fit. “Get the fuck out.”
I stared at him for a long moment and struck him in the throat, hard enough to bring him to his knees in a coughing fit but not enough to kill him. Yet.
I roared, “I said, did someone give you the impression that the Green Zone was public fucking property?”
My words echoed around the walls of the mostly empty warehouse.
A smaller biker with short blond hair ran toward me, yelling at the top of his fucking lungs, at least until a hit to the jaw shut him up. The kid was scrappy, though, and he didn’t go down easy, matching me hit for hit for a few minutes.
“Old man can box,” he laughed and ducked to avoid being hit.
“Not bad. Too bad it won’t last.” I took a step forward and hit him with three jabs square in the nose until I heard the barely perceptible crack that told me I’d hit my mark.
“Son of a bitch,” he howled in pain as blood rushed from his nose. He took a few steps back as I advanced.
“Fuck this.” Like young punks often do, the asshole pulled a gun on me and smiled. “Not so tough now, are you?”
I shrugged. “Still tough, but not stupid.” I saw the look in his eyes and knew the kid wouldn’t pull the trigger.
He sucked in a breath and let it out slowly, the mark of an uncertain killer. His grip shifted slightly on the gun, and a shot rang out before he could squeeze the trigger, sending him down on one knee, crying like a fucking baby. “You fucking shot me.”
This disbelief in his voice told me these guys weren’t a real threat, they were fucking amateurs. Unfortunately for them, they were amateurs who’d made a fatal mistake.
“I just beat you to the punch,” I told him and came closer, grabbing a handful of hair as I leaned over him. “Don’t ever aim a gun you don’t intend to shoot. And if I see you in the Green Zone again or hear you’ve been terrorizing my people or my businesses, the next bullet goes right here.” I dug my index finger into the center of his forehead, the spot right between his eyebrows. “Got it?”
I looked around, satisfied to see all five of them nodding with fear in their eyes because they knew how easily I could’ve killed them today.
Another guy came forward with all the Psycho shit on his arms and neck. “We are The Psychos, and we do what the fuck we want,” he growled at me, eyes flashing with fear when Terry blocked his path.
“Then I guess what you want right now is to get the fuck out.”
Terry pulled his meaty fist back and let it snap right in the middle of his face, sending his neck flying back at an awkward angle.
“Mission accomplished, dipshit.” Terry laughed like the crazed fucker he was when it came to a fight. “Who the fuck taught these assholes how to fight?”
Three more chairs scraped against the cement floor, and my eyes lit with excitement at what was coming. “Us,” I answered easily and tightened my fists as the rest of The Psychos ran at us.
The young shits put up a good fight, but me and Terry had size, anger, and skill on our side. Fists flew, hard and fast, and I ended up dodging a knife a few times; one small slit sent a trickle of blood down my arm.
Terry and I were a little bruised, but The Psychos were laid out, bruised and bloody with a few broken bones. They w
ould live to regret coming into the Green Zone.
“If I have to tell you again, none of you will come out alive.”
I didn’t wait for confirmation because I knew they understood. Violence was the only language they understood. I left, feeling like at least one fucking thing had been accomplished today.
“This isn’t over, motherfucker!”
Terry and I froze at the voice and slowly turned around.
“I guess they don’t like the easy way,” Terry growled.
“Guess not,” I agreed.
Terry looked at me with a gleam in his eyes. “Bet I can pick off more than you and faster.”
I smiled. “Think so?”
“Willing to bet haggis and whiskey on it.”
“Bet.”
Without another word, me and Terry glanced around before we went back inside, aiming at every moving body and shooting until they stopped moving. Less than a minute later, we walked back out, The Psychos nothing but a memory.
“That was fun.” Terry dabbed at the blood on his split lip, a broad, satisfied grin on his face.
“It was,” I agreed as we made our way back to the car and headed back to Midnight Mass. “Now I need a fucking drink.”
“Amen, brother.” Terry barked out a laugh. “You’ll need it to go with that haggis you’re having for lunch.”
I groaned and shook my head. “I hit that last fucker first.”
“You did, but I’m pretty sure my head shot did him in.”
“Cocky fucker,” I grumbled, which made Terry laugh.
“Thanks. Kat thinks so too.”
Fuck, I didn’t need to know that.
Chapter Fourteen
Mo
What was it about prenatal vitamins that made them sound like maracas? Being pregnant was certainly no party, not with the morning sickness that lasted morning, noon, and night.
Not with the sensitivity to smells, which was pretty much an ongoing thing when you worked in a pub and sometimes—too much lately—moonlighted at a titty bar. And not with such specific fucking cravings that the chefs at the three different restaurants inside Emerald Isle either thought I was losing my mind or pregnant.
