by Steven Banks
She looked at me with teary eyes and disgusting stuff coming out of her nose.
“Please, Tom?”
I knew I had to fly outside someday. If I didn’t do it now, I might never do it. My landings were good and I never crashed anymore. I tried not to think of the videos of owls eating bats. Maybe those bats just didn’t know to look out for owls? I couldn’t remember ever seeing an owl in our town. I had seen hawks a couple of times. But I did have night vision, so I could be on the lookout, and if I flew fast and low to the ground they might not see me.
“Okay, Emma, I’ll do it.”
She gave me a hug, which never happens.
* * *
I knew I’d have to fly by Zeke’s house and show him. He would kill me if I didn’t. I called him to say I was flying over after I went to Carrot Boy’s house.
“Excellent! I will be ready and waiting, Bat-Tom!” said Zeke.
I listened to see if it sounded like he was doing jumping jacks.
He wasn’t.
“Okay, Zeke, be outside on your front lawn. Pretend you’re looking at the stars or something.”
Emma came into my bedroom. I opened my window and a breeze blew in.
“Okay, Tom, do it!”
I said, “Turn to bat. Bat, I shall be.”
Bam!
I was a bat.
Emma shook her head. “That is…so…freaky.”
I flew up to the windowsill. I looked out, very carefully, for owls or hawks or eagles. I didn’t see any.
Emma said, “If you see Madison there, can you, like, fly in her hair and scratch her face?”
“No! I’m spying, I’m not attacking.”
I took three deep breaths to get ready.
“Tom?”
“What?”
Emma lowered her voice. “Be careful.”
I flapped my wings, lifted up off the sill, and flew outside.
50.
The Flight of the Bat–Tom
Why did I wait so long to do this?
Flying outside was a million times more fun than flying inside. I could go faster and higher and farther.
I went way up in the sky and looked down. I could see the whole city. It was like I was in an airplane, but I was the airplane. I stopped flapping my wings, held them straight out, and glided. A breeze pushed me along. The air was cool, the stars were out, I could see the almost full moon off in the distance.
Maybe being a Vam-Wolf-Zom was okay?
* * *
I flew over to Carrot Boy’s house first. He was on his front lawn with a girl who looked exactly like Emma’s description of Madison Debney. They were sitting on the grass, really close to each other. It didn’t look good.
I landed on his roof. (It was a very good landing.) Carrot Boy was holding a box with a silver necklace in it. Madison gave him a hug. I felt bad for Emma. I cocked my ear to listen.
“Lucas, you are so sweet.”
“No, I’m not.”
“Yes, you are! You are such an awesome guy!”
“Well, you’re pretty awesome too, Madison.”
“Thanks.”
“No, hey, thank you for making the necklace,” said Carrot Boy. “Emma’s gonna love it.”
I could make out a little silver heart on a chain.
“I hope so,” said Madison. “I think it’s the best necklace I’ve ever made.”
A motorcycle pulled up to the curb with a big, muscly guy who looked like Wolverine. Madison ran over and gave him a kiss that confirmed they were boyfriend and girlfriend.
“Later, Lucas!” said Madison as she climbed onto the back of the motorcycle.
Wolverine grunted and they roared off. Emma would be happy to hear all this. But first, I had to go to Zeke’s house.
* * *
As I got closer, I could see Zeke standing on his front lawn with a pair of binoculars. When he saw me, he put the binoculars down and reached into his back pants pockets. He pulled out two flashlights and turned them on. Then, he raised his arms straight up and started waving the flashlights back and forth, like workers do at airports for landing planes.
“You are cleared for landing, Bat-Tom!” he yelled.
“Shhh!” I yelled. But he couldn’t hear me.
“Bat-Tom, flight twenty-seven approaching on runway three-thirty-five! You are good to land!”
I landed on the grass. Perfectly.
Zeke ran over. “Excellent landing!”
Normally he would have done jumping jacks for about five minutes, but he didn’t. Martha Livingston was a good hypnotizer. Maybe someday I would be too.
I flew around Zeke’s yard a few times, went way up in the sky, and then swooped back down. He watched me with his mouth hanging open.
“Okay, Zeke, I gotta go. I’ll see you tomorrow!”
Zeke stood and raised the flashlights again.
“Bat-Tom is cleared for takeoff!”
Next stop: Annie’s house, for a quick flyby.
* * *
I flew over our school, swooping down on the track and then back up again. I flew over the park, sailing across the tops of trees and Tanner Gantt’s house. I didn’t know he had a pool in his backyard, but when I got closer I saw there was no water in it. He had a big tree with a tire swing. I wondered if he ever sat in that swing.
I got to Annie’s house and saw her in her bedroom on the second floor. I landed on her windowsill and peeked in. I was surprised that her room was messy. There were clothes all over the floor and the bed and her chair. Her bookshelf was crammed with books and little toys and figurines. On her wall she had a poster of that singer with the crazy hair and weird voice whose name I don’t know how to pronounce.
Annie was sitting on her bed, next to a stuffed animal from one of those animated Japanese films she loves, strumming her guitar and singing. It was a song I hadn’t heard before. She’d sing a little, then she’d stop and write down some words on a pad, and then sing again.
It sounded like a good song, even though it wasn’t about me. I was just about to knock on the window when she sang the chorus:
“Listen to me, here is my song,
Listen to me, I’ll sing it for free,
Listen to me, all night long.”
I was figuring out a good harmony part for the song when Annie stopped singing and looked up at the window.
Right at me.
Could she see the brown bat sitting on her windowsill?
I froze.
Then, in the reflection of the window, I saw something else.
It was big, it was brown, and it was coming right at me.
I swiveled my head around. It was an owl, with wings spread and talons up, silently gliding directly toward me.
It looked hungry.
51.
The Owl and the Bat
Unless I did something fast, I was going to be this owl’s dinner.
I flew off the windowsill and the owl missed me by an inch, slamming into the window. I flapped my wings as fast as I could. Maybe the owl had knocked himself out? I took a quick look behind me. He hadn’t. He was coming after me.
Who knew owls could fly so quietly, and so fast?
Why didn’t they teach us about owls in school?
Why didn’t Martha Livingston give me a How to Get Away from an Owl Who Wants to Eat You lesson?
The owl got closer.
I decided to dive down to the ground and turn back into me. But the owl was so close I could feel the wind from his wings. He was going to get me before I could land on the ground and change. I had to do something fast.
Up ahead, I saw that the tree in Tanner Gantt’s backyard had a small knothole. I could fly inside, where the owl couldn’t get me.
I beat my wings as fast as I could, then pulled them in at
the last moment and flew into the tiny entrance. The owl hovered right outside the hole. He tried to reach in with his talons, but I was just out of his grasp. He perched on a branch outside the hole, staring at me. He was going to sit there until I came out.
I couldn’t turn into me because the hole was so tiny. Maybe if I yelled at the owl, he’d get scared and fly away.
“Hey! Get out of here! Go! Shoo!”
The owl blinked his big eyes a few times, but didn’t move.
I imagined the owl taking me home to his nest.
“Hey, kids! Daddy’s home! Look what I brought for dinner!”
“Yay! It’s a bat!”
“He looks delicious, Daddy!”
“I want to eat his heart!”
“I want to eat his liver!”
“I want to eat his eyes!”
“Can we eat him while he’s still alive, Daddy?”
“Yes, kids! That’s the most nutritious way!”
It was going to be a long night in the knothole. I was hungry and tired. I fell asleep for a little bit, and when I woke up, the owl was gone. Maybe he was hiding, waiting to attack when I left the hole.
I slowly poked my bat head out. I didn’t see him, so I flew down from the tree as fast as I could. Once I landed in the empty pool I said, “Turn to human. Human, I shall be!”
I turned back into me and looked up, spotting the owl on a branch just above the knothole. His eyes narrowed when he saw me. Then, he spread his wings and silently flew away.
* * *
I was walking toward the shallow end of the pool to climb out when I saw a skateboard with Rabbit Attack! stickers all over it. It was Zeke’s. I knew Tanner Gantt stole it! I picked it up, climbed out of the pool, and heard a glass door slide open.
“Hey! What are you doing here, Marks!”
Tanner Gantt was standing on his back porch, holding a large, angry-looking dog on a leash.
“I’m getting Zeke’s skateboard that you stole!” I said.
“I didn’t steal it!”
“Then why is it here?”
“I bought it from Dennis Hannigan!”
Dennis Hannigan was a high school kid who made Tanner Gantt look like Winnie-the-Pooh. He was always stealing stuff.
The dog growled.
“You’re trespassing, Marks! I’m calling the police!” Tanner shouted.
From inside, his mom yelled, “Tanner! Shut up! I’m trying to sleep!”
I jumped over the fence—in one leap, which felt kind of cool—and ran back to my house.
When I got home, I told Emma about Madison and Carrot Boy and the necklace. She started crying again.
“Lukester got me a necklace? He is so sweet! He is the best boyfriend in the world!”
“You know what else happened?” I said. “An owl almost ate me!”
“Oh,” she said, brushing her hair.
“Did you hear what I said? I almost got eaten by an owl!”
“Right. Okay. But he didn’t eat you.”
“No! I wouldn’t be here if he did!”
“So, what’s the big deal? You’re a Vam-Wolf-Zom. You can take care of an owl.”
I started to explain, but decided it wasn’t worth it.
Emma is the worst.
* * *
I gave Zeke’s skateboard back to him at the bus stop the next day.
“Excellent! Thanks for getting this, T-Man!”
He was excited and for a second it looked like he was going to start doing jumping jacks, but he didn’t. It was weird, I sort of missed him doing them.
We got on the bus and the first thing Annie said was, “You guys! Last night an owl almost broke my window!”
“Really?” I said. “What time is band practice tonight?”
Annie ignored my question. “I was working on a new song and this huge owl just banged into my window! I think he was trying to get a bird, or maybe it was bat.”
“No, I don’t think it could’ve been a bat,” I said.
“Why not?” asked Annie.
Tanner Gantt got on the bus and for once I was glad.
“Hey!” said Zeke. “You stole my skateboard!”
“No, I didn’t, Zimmer-Turd! I already told your trespassing friend, I bought it from Dennis Hannigan. ‘Sides, it’s a cheap, crappy board anyway. I only rode it once because it sucked.” Then he turned to me. “Freak Face, if I ever see you on my property again, you are dead!”
52.
Spying
We had band practice that day after school. Dog Hots finally had a full drum set. Annie sang the new song that I’d heard when I watched her through the window, before I was almost killed by the owl.
When she got to the chorus I sang along with her and harmonized.
“Listen to me, here is my song,
Listen to me, I’ll sing it for free,
Listen to me, all night long.”
That turned out to be a HUGE mistake.
Annie stopped playing her guitar. “How do you know that?”
“What?” I said, as innocently as I could.
“How did you know that song?”
“Uh…I just sort of…guessed?”
I couldn’t tell her I’d been perched on her windowsill.
“How could you guess the words and the melody?” she asked suspiciously.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I must have heard you sing it before.”
“That’s impossible. I wrote it last night. There’s no way you could know it, unless you heard me sing it. Wait, did you use your wolf-hearing to spy on me?”
“What? No!” (That was the truth.)
“Then how did you know it?!”
“I…read your mind?”
“Tell me!”
I didn’t want to lie to her.
“Okay. Let me explain…. I learned how to turn into a bat and fly.”
“About time!” said Dog Hots.
“So, I was flying by your house, and I was going to show you, and then I saw you in the window and—”
“You were looking in my window?!”
“Well, sort of—”
“You spied on me!”
“No! I wasn’t spying. I just saw you sitting on your bed in your pajamas—”
“You spied on me in my bedroom!”
“Technically, I wasn’t spying, because I’m not a spy. I saw you singing the song and—”
“YOU SPIED ON ME!”
“Annie, I was going to knock on the window, but that owl tried to kill me!”
“I don’t care about that stupid owl!” yelled Annie.
“That owl could’ve taken me back to feed his baby owls! They were going to eat me alive!”
“Get out of here!” screeched Annie, going to her front door.
“Annie, come on, don’t—”
She opened the door. “You are out of the band! And I don’t want to talk to you ever again!”
“Annie, I didn’t mean to—”
“GO!”
I walked out and she slammed the door.
“Don’t slam the door!” yelled her mom from somewhere.
53.
Perks of Being a Werewolf
I was looking forward to getting away to Gram’s for Thanksgiving (#5 on my Best Holiday list). Tanner Gantt kept saying he was going to call the police because I had trespassed, Capri was still mad at me for saying she didn’t have a good voice, and Annie was even madder and wouldn’t let me back in the band.
There was going to be a full moon on Thanksgiving night, so on the drive up to Gram’s, Emma said, “Can we please eat dinner early, before you-know-who turns into you-know-what? I don’t want to have to eat looking at his wolf face.”
“Your brother has a very nice wolf face, Emma,�
� said Mom.
“Mom, nobody has a nice wolf face. Except, maybe sometimes, in a movie. And we are not living in that movie. We are living in the Vam-Wolf-Zom movie!”
* * *
We always have Thanksgiving dinner early, before the sun goes down. I’m not a huge fan of turkey, but I love mashed potatoes and gravy and stuffing. I do not like broccoli and I never will. Pumpkin pie with homemade whipped cream is pretty good.
We didn’t have any leftovers this year because I was zombie-starving and I had three servings and ate the rest of the turkey.
Dad was not happy about that.
“What?” he moaned. “No leftovers? No turkey sandwiches? No turkey salad? Turkey hash?” He looked sad.
“Okay!” said Mom, in her announcement voice. “Now, we are going around the table and everyone is going to say what they are thankful for.”
Emma and I both groaned.
Mom started. “I am thankful that we are all here together.”
“I’m thankful that we’re healthy,” said Gram.
Emma said, “I am thankful that Tom hasn’t eaten any of us or sucked our blood…yet.”
I smiled at her and said, “I’m thankful that Emma is going to college in two years.”
“I am thankful that I don’t have to do the dishes,” said Dad.
Emma and I groaned again.
* * *
We have a Thanksgiving Rule: Mom, Gram, and Dad make the meal, and Emma and I do the dishes. While we’re in the kitchen, working hard, washing the five hundred dishes and pots and pans and silverware, they’re all by the cozy fireplace. Dad falls asleep on the sofa, Mom starts to read a book and falls asleep, and Gram puts on one of her old records and crochets. This time she was playing the Bob Dylan album Dad had brought her.
