I narrowed my eyes at him, stepped back, and eyed them all. They were acting shifty as fuck. And they hadn’t played a game last night, so that made no sense. Was I seeing shit, or were the others sporting bruises and scrapes too? Maybe it was just the masks and makeup, the uneven light of the fire deceiving me.
Before I could pull my phone out and turn on the flashlight to check either way, Will pushed off the front of his car and wrapped his arms around my waist. “Hey, D. Wanna go somewhere quiet?”
He smirked and pulled me in close. His eyes weren’t glassy, and he wasn’t swaying. Will was stone-cold sober at a party. Something was definitely up.
“Not tonight.” I pushed at his shoulders, and he let go, but then he grabbed my hand and tried to turn me around.
“OK, cool. Then let’s go get a drink and find the girls.”
“No.” I wrenched my hand out of his. “Will, what the fuck . . .”
“Everything OK here?” Suddenly Hendrix was there, his mask sitting on top of his head and his dark eyes taking everything in. Why was he everywhere? And why was no one telling me the truth?
A motherfucking werewolf jumped out from between the parked cars, growling and raising its paws in the air. Some of the guys jumped in surprise while the others laughed nervously at the performer.
“Not now, asshole!” I screamed, and the guy in the suit gave me a hairy middle finger and stalked back into the shadows.
I turned on Hendrix. “Everything is fine, Hendrix! Mind your own business.” Then I turned on Will. “No, I don’t want to get a drink or go find a quiet place with you, William.” I looked around at the crowd of idiots from my school. “You’re all about as subtle as a sledgehammer. I don’t know what this shit is about, but I don’t like it, and I’m going to get to the bottom of it.”
With that, I turned on my heel and stomped back toward the crowd and the fire and the music . . . and yet another thing I had to manage.
I came to a stop at the edge of the dance floor and looked up to the pitch-black sky, begging whatever deity was listening for strength.
Amaya and Harlow were still dancing lasciviously, but now they were also making out. It was nothing new—they kissed from time to time at parties and shit. Amaya liked to tease the boys, and Harlow liked to subvert people’s assumptions about her. It was just a bit of fun, but there were a lot of people here we didn’t know, and they were both high, and the college guys were dancing a little too close. I didn’t want them to do anything they’d regret . . . or worse.
I caught Turner as he came past with a couple of beers. “Hey, can you get Mena home? I need to take care of this . . .” I gestured to the dance floor. Amaya was now shirtless, nothing but a delicate, lacy bralette covering her perky B cups.
“Yeah, I’ll take her home. We have a designated . . . whoa . . . okay . . .” His eyebrows rose as he stared.
“Hey!” I snapped my fingers in front of his face and shoved him. “Go find your girlfriend.”
He cleared his throat. “Yes. Yup. Good idea.”
“Shit,” I muttered as he moved away. I had no idea how I was going to get two trashed people into the car.
Once again, Hendrix appeared uninvited at my side, popping an obnoxiously loud bubble with his gum. “I’ll get the little one. You get the naked one.”
I glared at him for a moment. He was sticking his nose in my business again. But Turner was busy with Mena, and they were both kind of drunk, and the football guys were pissing me off . . . I really didn’t have any other choice.
“Fine.” I barreled through the crowd, which looked as if it was about to turn into an orgy any second now. More people had started taking clothes off, and several were making out and grinding on each other.
“Hey!” I clapped my hands next to Harlow’s and Amaya’s heads.
“Donna!” they both yelled, as if we hadn’t seen each other in years.
“Time to go.” I picked up their discarded clothing and Amaya’s Louis Vuitton bag.
“Where are we—oop!” Harlow descended into a fit of giggles as Hendrix picked her up and swung her over his shoulder in one smooth move. I wrapped an arm around Amaya’s waist and pulled her along.
Trying to get them into the car was like trying to wrangle several cats into a bath with one arm tied behind your back. There was screaming and uncontrollable laughter, and I got scratched on my arm. In the end, we managed to shove them into the back seat, and I turned the child lock on so they couldn’t let themselves out.
I slammed the door and leaned heavily back against it, blowing my hair off my forehead. Hendrix leaned his hip next to me and laughed.
“Thanks for helping. You didn’t have to do that,” I said, unable to look at him for some reason.
“You’re welcome.”
There was a long pause. I stared out into the dark woods. Why was I always the one taking care of everyone else? Maybe I wanted to get trashed every once in a while and know someone would get me home safe.
My friends had said to me more than once I was the strongest person they knew. But that’s the thing about being seen that way—you don’t feel as if you have permission to be vulnerable. You don’t feel as if you’re ever allowed to fall apart.
I didn’t know why I was letting this shit get to me in the middle of the night in a field in bumfuck nowhere, but suddenly my throat felt tight, and tears stung the backs of my eyes.
Hendrix sighed, reminding me he was still there.
Before I could gather myself, put my strong mask back on, he reached out and squeezed my shoulder. His thumb rubbed smooth circles at the base of my neck.
I grabbed his wrist, but instead of pushing him off me, I found myself leaning into him. “I’m just so fucking tired.”
“I know.” His deep voice had me feeling in my bones that he really did know. I wasn’t talking about just tonight.
He pulled me into his chest and held me tightly, and even with my face buried in his shirt, I was suddenly able to breathe better. I took a long inhale, closing my eyes as the scent of his expensive aftershave mixed with cinnamon hit the back of my throat.
When he’d embraced me at Mena’s birthday party, I was drunk. I could blame my momentary lapse in judgment on my impaired decision-making skills. But as he held me at the edge of fire and chaos, dancing and drama, I had no such excuse. Being in his arms felt so right.
But it wasn’t. It couldn’t be.
My heart hammered.
I straightened, pushed out of his hold.
Our eyes met in the dim light.
The urge to kiss him was palpable, but I forced myself to turn away, get into the car, drive off.
My hands shook the entire drive home, silent tears streaming down my face.
What the fuck was happening to me?
Chapter Thirteen
Hendrix
Aunt Hannah flicked the switch, and the multicolored twinkle lights came to life.
“Ahh. Now it feels like Christmas!” She beamed, backing away from the ugliest tree I’d ever seen. But it was also the first one I’d gotten to decorate myself, so my smile back was genuine. Growing up, we always had at least five trees spread throughout the house, and each one was professionally decorated. I’d been scolded anytime I reached for a shiny ornament.
“You forgot the main bit.” Robbie waved the red-and-gold star at her. We’d met over dinner that night we bumped into Donna in Devilbend. He was actually a nice guy, and he and my aunt were good together. They were both sarcastic and liked to talk politics and had this weird kind of calm about them. It was nice being around an adult couple who liked each other. I was pretty sure they actually loved each other.
“Shit!” Hannah propped her hands on her hips, then pointed at me. “You. Tall, surly teenager in the armchair. You can reach.”
“So can he!” I pointed at Robbie, who promptly pointed at my aunt. We both frowned at him.
“What?” He shrugged. “Everyone else was pointing. I just wanted to be
cool.”
It was such a lame joke, but I laughed anyway. Was this what it was like to be part of an actual family?
Without having to be asked again—another first for me—I got to my feet and secured the star on top of the gaudy tree.
It was only a week until Christmas, but everything felt different. Back in New York, the temperature would be hovering around zero, while here in California, it was just chilly enough for a coat. Back home, I’d probably be going to my hundredth charity event of the season, playing the perfect son for my perfect parents. Here, all I’d done was go to school, hang out with my aunt and Robbie, and train with Turner at the gym.
He’d managed to drag me to that Halloween party only after assuring me it wasn’t being thrown by one of the kids from my school. He said Mena would be there with her friends, and realistically I knew that meant Donna would be there too, but I’d hoped the party would be big enough to avoid her. I’d obviously forgotten how fucking hard it was for me to stay away from that chick.
The air hostess outfit and ample cleavage had made her look like temptation incarnate. My eyes kept wandering over to her without meaning to, but what surprised me more was that I caught her looking my way too.
She’d made it clear after the incident in that teacher’s office that I meant nothing to her, but we’d hooked up twice now—and it was good. Our chemistry was off the charts. Even she couldn’t deny that.
We’d had a moment at her car. Another moment where unspoken things passed between us. And then that bitch ran from me again.
Why the fuck was I doing this to myself? I’d been so frustrated after she drove off that I made Turner and Mena leave as soon as I found them, basically telling them they were either coming with me now or finding their own way home.
They were silent and tense on the drive back to their apartment building, while I gripped the steering wheel way too hard and breathed through my stupid fucking emotions.
By the time I dropped them off, I’d calmed down enough to apologize. They both forgave me immediately and even asked if I was OK. Because that was the kind of people they were.
Why couldn’t I be more like Turner? Calm, happy, steady.
Why couldn’t I be interested in a girl like Mena? Nice, sweet, low drama.
No, I had to find the biggest bitch in town with the biggest fucking secret and make it my mission to get all up in her life.
I was seeing something in Donna I knew was inside me too. That twisting, writhing darkness had ruined my life, along with several others. I didn’t want a single other person to go through what I went through. To go through what I put those people through. Even if that person was treating me like dirt on her shoe.
Still, there was only so much I could take. If Donna wanted to ruin her life, who was I to stop her?
After that party I took a long hard look in the mirror, realized I didn’t need her rich brat problems, and redoubled my efforts to steer clear. For the next few weeks until Christmas break, I went to school, kept my head down, avoided her in the halls, and ate my lunch off campus or in my car. The only person my age I spoke to was Turner.
My phone buzzed on the coffee table, and I picked it up as I took a sip of eggnog. Who the hell invented this crap? And why was I still drinking it? I made a face and put the cup down, then froze as I read the message.
We won’t be able to make it to Devilbend for Christmas. Your father has had a work situation come up, and I really must oversee the Christmas Eve charity ball. Have a safe holiday with your aunt. Kisses, Mom.
I gripped my phone so fucking hard the screen actually cracked, the line through the glass cutting through my mother’s indifferent words. I stared at the message until the screen went black. Then I shot to my feet and stormed out the door, slamming it behind me, ignoring the things my aunt and Robbie were calling after me.
I wanted to hit someone, feel bone crunch under my knuckles. I wanted to drink an entire bottle of something expensive and let the alcohol obliterate everything. I wanted to find a chick and bury myself in her so deep this feeling would just melt away.
A flash of short blonde hair and mismatched eyes mixed with that last image, and suddenly I was thinking about fucking Donna. I growled and sped up.
I wanted to do a lot of things I used to do—things I’d vowed never to do again. Instead I walked. Even in my T-shirt and jeans, I didn’t feel the cold, hardly noticed when it started raining lightly.
I wasn’t sure how much time passed, but I didn’t go back until I was calm, my breathing even, the urge to do reckless, destructive shit gone.
As I walked back inside, I checked the front door for damage. Thankfully it was fine. When I popped my head in the kitchen, both Aunt Hannah and Robbie had already gotten to their feet and were on their way to the front of the house.
“Hendrix—”
“Hey, guys.” I cut my aunt off. “I’m really sorry about before. I’m just gonna grab a shower.”
I rushed up the stairs before they could answer.
After showering and getting dressed, I checked the time. It was after nine. I’d been out stalking the neighborhood for over three hours. I’d missed dinner. They had to be mad at me. I’d have to apologize again—do it better. I couldn’t handle it if Aunt Hannah kicked me out.
A knock sounded at the door, followed by my aunt’s soft voice. “Hendrix?”
“Come in,” I called, straightening my sheets and kicking some dirty clothes under the bed. I really needed to make more of an effort to keep my room clean.
“Hey.” She plopped onto the bed. “I got a message from your father.”
I sank down next to her, hanging my head. What was there to say?
“I’m sorry, honey.” Her warm hand rubbed my shoulder.
I frowned at her. “You’re not mad?”
She sat up a little straighter. “That your parents are dicks? Yeah, I’m pretty fucking mad about that. But how’s that your fault? Not mad at you.”
“I’m sorry about storming out.” I still felt the need to apologize. “And I’ll clean my room. And I’ll do more around the house.”
“Hendrix. Stop. You were upset. You went for a walk. I’m actually proud of you.”
“Proud of me?” What the fuck was this feeling in my chest? It felt as if it were about to bust open, spilling blood and guts everywhere, but . . . in a good way?
“What would you have done a year ago? To deal with something that upset you?”
The booze and drugs, the horrific violence, the depraved sex. I cringed.
“Exactly!” She laughed. “You did good, kid. And I don’t need a housekeeper.” She waved her hand. “Just stick to what we already discussed—good grades, no trouble—and we’re sweet. I’m not going to kick you out for not making your bed.”
Fuck. There it went again—blood and guts everywhere. Why were my eyes stinging? Oh my fucking god! I was about to cry. I cleared my throat and pushed that shit down. Maybe I needed to go for another walk.
“So, your father said something about a work thing coming up?”
I dragged my hand down my face. “Yeah, that’s what my mom said too. But it’s bullshit. There’s always a work thing, always a charity. It’s just an excuse.”
I hadn’t seen my parents since they’d shipped me off to Devilbend, and we hadn’t spoken in that entire time either. Most of my messages had gone completely ignored. It was OK—I knew I deserved it for what I’d done. But I’d been on my best fucking behavior. My grades were the best they’d ever been. I wasn’t expecting miracles, but some part of me had been looking forward to seeing them for Christmas, away from the pressures of their lives in New York. I hadn’t realized how big that part was until I got my mother’s text message.
Her excuse was almost certainly a copy/paste from some other message she’d sent to get out of another commitment. I didn’t even warrant a genuine explanation, let alone a phone call.
What had I expected? It wasn’t as though my parents had given
a shit about me before—why would they start now?
I hated myself a little for still craving their approval, their attention.
If I was really honest, that’s what had gotten me into this mess in the first place.
“All right, let’s hug it out.” Hannah got to her feet and waved her hands at me to get up. “I think we’ve worked up to it.”
I stood and reached for her, but she sidestepped me and jumped onto my bed. I gave her a withering look but couldn’t help the laughter bubbling up.
“Height advantage.” She held her arms out, and I gave her a hug, fighting chuckles the whole time. Despite being so small, she had a strong grip, and after the first-hug weirdness wore off, it was actually pretty damn comforting.
Like a champ, she didn’t hang around and make it awkward after.
“We’ll have a great Christmas, I promise. Even if it’s just the three of us,” she said as she jumped off my bed and left me alone in my room.
My phone went off, reminding me I’d need to get the screen fixed. It was another text from a person I hadn’t spoken to since leaving New York.
I’m going away during the holidays and won’t have service, so I wanted to get in touch and say merry Christmas early. And a happy New Year. I hope you make the most of it—for all the reasons we discussed. I truly wish you well, Hendrix.
I typed out and deleted my response a dozen times before giving up. She was probably leaving her home over Christmas because she couldn’t stand to be there—because of me. I’d taken so much from this woman, and here she was, wishing me well.
I didn’t deserve it, and I didn’t deserve Aunt Hannah’s kindness either.
I needed to remember why I was here, keep my head down, and stop getting sucked into Fulton Academy bullshit. And that meant avoiding Donna.
Chapter Fourteen
Like You Hurt: A Standalone Enemies to Lovers Romance (Devilbend Dynasty Book 2) Page 12
