by Nicole Thorn
For a moment, I thought he was going to come at me. He looked at the sweater I was in, and something about it stopped him from moving. His look turned into a glare that felt bitter.
“I’m sorry.”
He shook his head. “What did you do to get grounded?”
I swallowed. “Stayed out all night.”
“They don’t ground me for that.”
I shrugged.
After a few moments, I asked, “What the hell are they making you move?”
Lane opened his mouth, then closed it. I watched his eyes as he thought about something, as if he was coming to a decision. He smirked. “Might as well tell you. Mom and Dad are stealing gems and hoarding them. They’re selling them at higher prices, and making me help stash them for the store.”
I stood there, mouth wide open in shock that they would do that. “Since when do they need the money enough to do that?”
“They don’t. They just want more money.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. We were always a store on the up and up, and this made no sense to me. Our parents had old money, with new money rolling in every single day. I couldn’t see what the reasoning could have possibly been, and the risk didn’t feel worth it to me.
“That’s crazy,” I said.
“Yeah, and they keep making me help. They just left, so I need you to make me lunch while I move the boxes.”
I nodded and did as he asked.
X
I didn’t get to see Becket for the rest of the day. His father wanted him home, and that meant we both had to sleep all alone in our beds. I might have fallen asleep twice but I woke up both times, and stayed up for a while. Nothing about that night felt restful. I wanted to lay there and mope forever. But I couldn’t because school was starting soon.
I did get to talk to him on the phone a little, and that helped. Though his dad made sure he wasn’t up too late. Becket didn’t say anything about being hurt, so I trusted that nothing had happened when I was gone. I didn’t tell him about what happened to me because that muffled scream told me it would have saddened him for some reason.
My parents didn’t say anything when I was leaving for school. Dad was probably still mad at me, and Mom ignored me like always. She didn’t need anything from me, so I had no reason to open my mouth. Like a good girl, I got ready, kept my head down, and then left the house.
Becket was waiting for me outside. We walked to school together, hand in hand. It made everything feel better again.
“Do you want to leave campus for lunch today?” I asked on our way to school. My dad would have killed me if he found out I’d done that but I cared so little.
“If you’d like,” Becket responded. “I don’t mind whatever you want to do.”
When we were closer to the school, I realized that with the new ban on Becket, I would have to warn him not to show up at the front door. I doubted he would have anyway because I didn’t think he liked it very much. I could understand not wanting to talk to my parents.
“So...” I started. “My dad wasn’t happy about me spending the night,” I said carefully. “He told me not to see you anymore.”
Becket looked over at me. “Oh.”
“I’m ignoring him, obviously. But be warned that he wouldn’t be happy to see you.”
He nodded. “I won’t be seen then.”
I smiled, cuddling up to him as we approached the building.
It happened instantly, the settling down of chatter when the students saw us. You’d think we were coated in the blood of the innocent or something. My first thought was that they were surprised to see us like this but that didn’t make sense. We’d been hanging out for a while, went to the dance together, and everyone thought we were only together because we were the freaks of the animal kingdom.
So why were they staring?
We approached the steps to enter the building, and that was when the whispering started. Some of the stares looked like they stemmed from pity, others with glee. I couldn’t come up with any kind of reasoning for it, so I lived with confusion. Surely, it wasn’t us they were looking at. And it wasn’t because we were hand in hand, and attached like we’d die otherwise. Why would they care about us at all?
When Becket opened the door for us, we saw Hel and her little group of monsters hanging around her. Next to them were Julian, Ricky, and Derrick, looking far too pleased with themselves, smugly hanging out. Then they all looked over at us, then burst out into laughter that made me cringe to hear. My body urged me to silence them, making the people unable to even breathe anymore. Tear their skin, leave them in heaps.
Maybe I would have done that if I hadn’t looked up and saw the reason for all the staring.
Chapter Twenty-One
Blood in My Veins, Blood On My Skin
Becket
Manny’s eyes lifted past the group of students, and her mouth fell open. I followed her line of sight, seeing what had that look of quiet horror on her face. I cocked my head at the pictures, unsure of where they had come from. A few logical leaps told me they had to have come from Hel.
Dozens of them had been plastered over the walls in various places. All the pictures were of me, and I didn’t have a shirt on in any of them. Some, I wasn’t even wearing pants. All my scars showed. Well... not all of them. That was how I knew it had to have been Hel who provided these.
The smiley face on my chest wasn’t in any of the pictures. There was a line that cut across my stomach that was missing as well. Some of the scars that looked faded and light now were dark red, almost gruesome-looking back then.
Still, I frowned because I had never seen her take photos of me. I certainly hadn’t let her. She must have done it when I wasn’t paying attention. There were a few where I wasn’t even awake. Those were the ones that came up close on my scars. So many that they had nearly obliterated my smooth skin even at that point. These photos were over a year old.
“How...” Manny whispered.
“I’m not certain,” I told her.
Hel laughed. “Oh, come on now. You didn’t think you were special, did you? That he loved you bestest because you were so damn important.”
Manny’s eyes went from shocked to hostile in a second flat. She flew at the other girl, and I had to snag her around the waist to keep her from doing something to Hel that couldn’t be reversed. Unfortunately, we both knew that my holding her wasn’t the prevention that it was meant to be.
“Please don’t,” I whispered to Manny.
“Why?” she demanded. “It would be so easy.”
“Because I can’t keep everyone in this hallway from knowing it was you,” I told her. Manny blinked, then looked around at all the people. The halls had gone deadly silent, and all the students stood around, waiting for a fight to break out. Manny took a deep breath, nodding her head.
“Okay,” she said. “I won’t.”
I set her back on her feet, still paying close attention to her. I trusted that she wouldn’t lie to me but I also trusted that she loved me more than she loved her common sense. The same that I loved her.
“Aw,” Hel said. “Look at that. She lets him boss her around. Tell me, does he ask for you to bleed during?” Hel and her friends cackled. “Figures that a creep like him would need a freak like you. I bet that feels really good, huh?”
“Shut up, Hel,” someone in the crowd shouted. The voice was familiar, and it took me a second to place it with that Merry girl. She stood separated from everyone else, her eyes on the pictures. Unlike most of the people in the hallway, she didn’t look interested or bothered by them. Maybe a little saddened but that was it.
“Excuse me?” Hel said. “What, you’re going to take sides with this creep now?”
Merry turned her eyes her suddenly cold eyes – to Hel. I could have sworn a chill wind went through the hallway. “He’s the creep? I don’t see him hoarding pictures from someone he’s only fucked three times, and then putting them on display for all the world to
see, just because he can. How many pictures did you take of him, Hel? It doesn’t look like he was aware of any of them, and I can count at least twenty different ones from here. But he’s the creep?”
The silence in the hallway changed, going from tensed to anticipatory. I watched as the students turned to Hel, awaiting her comeback.
Julian came to her rescue. “She probably took them as insurance. Right, Hel? Wouldn’t want a creep like him thinking he could take something from you whenever he wanted, right?”
“Yeah,” Hel said, a sneer on her face, and in her voice. “Only an idiot would think he hadn’t done this to himself.”
Merry shook her head. She walked closer to Hel, whispering something so low that no one else could hear it. I watched as all the blood drained from Hel’s face, and her eyes filled with fury. She shoved Merry away, shouting, “What the fuck is wrong with you? You like fucking creeps too?”
Manny’s hands balled into fists, and I had to snag her around the waist again. Tighter this time. I buried my face in her shoulder. “It’s okay, Manny,” I whispered. “They aren’t saying anything I haven’t heard before. It’s okay.” I made my voice as soothing as possible but it wasn’t easy with everyone around us trying to decide whose side they wanted to be on.
If they wanted to persecute me like Hel, or if they wanted to attack Hel like Merry.
“It’s not okay,” Manny said through her teeth. “None of this is okay.”
“But I don’t care,” I whispered. “The things they say, the words they try to fling at me as if they matter, they don’t. These people don’t matter to me, and neither do their opinions.”
“They shouldn’t,” Manny said.
“Then why are you so angry?”
Manny turned to stare at me, her eyes bright with quiet fury. “Because they hurt you.”
“I don’t feel hurt.”
“You should.”
“What the fuck are you doing, creeps?” Hel said. “In case you don’t remember, you’re supposed to be paying attention to us. I haven’t heard you deny anything that I’ve said. Oh, wait, let me guess. Manny, you like it when he hurts himself, don’t you? You get off on watching him bleed?”
Manny’s green eyes burned like they were on fire. “Becket, let go of me.” Her voice was cool. Chilly, almost. I released her. Manny took one step forward, and shoved Hel with all her might. I sensed the blood trying to pour from Hel’s shoulders as the girl let out a horrified scream. I stopped the flow, before it could stain her clothes.
“Jeez, Hel,” a boy shouted. “You can’t handle one little shove.”
Everyone started laughing.
The laughter died down quickly, and I looked around until I saw why. The principal headed this way with two men flanking him. His expression turned grim when he saw all the students standing around. “Everyone, break it up!” he shouted, slamming his hand into a locker. The air vibrated around us like a massive, pulsing thing.
The students scattered, all but a few of us. Hel, with tears in her eyes, turned to the man. “Mr. Wilcox, Manny hurt me!” Hel shouted, pushing her way between some other kids. She made her eyes huge and watery.
“You look fine,” Mr. Wilcox said. “You should consider yourself lucky that I’m not working on expelling you right this second. Leave.” The tone of his voice was like nothing I’d heard before coming from a teacher. Cold, brutal honesty.
Manny backed into me, like she could protect me from what people had seen, or what the principal was about to do.
Hel scurried off, and her band of friends scattered. After a moment, the only people left were Manny and me. I looked from the empty hallway, to Mr. Wilcox. He sighed, suddenly looking a decade older. His eyes scanned the halls, over all the pictures that hung up around us, and finally came to rest on me. “Becket, could you follow me, please?”
“Okay,” I said.
“I’m coming too,” Manny said.
Mr. Wilcox looked her in the eyes. “No, Manny. Go to class. Or take these pictures down if you would prefer but you cannot follow us.”
The desire to argue was apparent in Manny’s eyes. She opened her mouth but then closed it and rocked back on her heels. I kissed her cheek and walked away, feeling her eyes on me the entire time. I wanted to tell her everything would be all right but I didn’t know if that would be true.
Would Mr. Wilcox suspend me for this? Would he ask me to leave the school? Would I ever get to see Manny again if I wasn’t allowed back into this building? I didn’t have an answer to any of my questions, and it hurt to realize it, almost as much as it hurt to walk away from her.
We ended up in Mr. Wilcox’s office. He ushered me over to a seat and asked me to please wait there. When he left, I pulled my phone out. My intention had been to text my father but instead, I texted Manny, saying that we’d figure out anything that we had to. She responded immediately, saying that we would, promising that everything would be all right. I tightened my grip on the phone until it almost hurt.
The door behind me opened, and I turned to see two policemen standing there. One was short, African American, graying at the temples. He gave me a kind look but I didn’t trust it. The other man was tall, Hispanic, and young enough to be fresh from the academy. He barely looked at me.
“Hello,” the older officer said. I read his nameplate and saw that it said G. Scott. “Becket Anders?”
“Yes,” I said.
He held his hand out to me. I shook it without hesitation, knowing anything else would get me in trouble. I was already in trouble.
The two men took seats across from me, and I had to turn my chair around to face them. The younger officer, whose nameplate said M. Mendez, leaned forward. “You’ve obviously seen these already?” He handed over a sheaf of papers. They were copies of the pictures. If not all of them, then enough. I didn’t flip through them. The one on top was of me sitting down. My elbows rested on my knees, and I had my face turned away. All the scars on my torso shined in whatever the lighting had been.
I could see more of the background in this picture and recognized Hel’s bedroom. I put the pictures aside. “Yes. I’ve seen them.”
“How old are you, Becket?”
“Eighteen,” I said.
“How long have you been eighteen?”
“My birthday is in December,” I told him.
Mendez nodded, and Scott took over without effort. “Most of those scars look older than that. Some look years old.”
I didn’t say anything.
“Who do you live with, Becket?”
My mouth felt dry but I answered anyway. This was nothing that they couldn’t find out from Mr. Wilcox. “My father.”
“Did your father hurt you?”
“My father’s never hurt me,” I said, simply. It was the truth and sounded like it. Yet, the men still looked at each other. I watched their faces, waiting for them to dismiss me.
They did not.
“You look uncomfortable,” Mendez said. “Why is that?”
“Because I want to leave,” I said.
“You don’t need to get an attitude.” Scott this time. He sounded less than pleased with me.
“I do not have an attitude,” I said. “You asked me a question, and I answered it.”
Scott’s eyes turned from that kindness to something more irritated. “If your father has never hurt you, then you shouldn’t have any issues answering my questions.”
Mr. Wilcox cleared his throat. “May I speak with you gentlemen really quick?” He gestured for them all to leave the room. I stood up as they stepped out and put my ear to the door.
Mr. Wilcox’s voice was the first I heard. “I know this might seem strange to you but Becket is telling the truth when he says he’s just answering. Every year, all his teachers say the same thing, that he talks like this but he doesn’t seem to understand that he’s giving them attitude. We wanted to have him tested for certain... personality issues but his father staunchly refused.”
&
nbsp; “You’re saying he’s not going to be much help?” Mendez said. “There’s something going on here, and someone put all these scars on that boy. Do you want this to continue until he dies?”
“I’m not saying that you shouldn’t question him,” Wilcox said. “I’m telling you that you need to ask different ones.”
“We know how to do our job,” Mendez countered.
“What can you do? He’s already over eighteen, and if he wants to stay with whoever is doing this to him, then you can’t stop him,” the principal threw back without missing a beat.
“There’s plenty that we can do,” Scott whispered, so quietly that I could barely hear it. “Even if he’s the one doing this to himself, we can get him the help that he needs. Or you could. Either he’s being tortured, or he’s a danger to himself and others. Do you want to have deaths on your conscience?”
It sounded like the conversation was over, so I drifted back to my seat and sat down. My heart thudded steadily. They wanted to take me away from Manny. I just knew it, deep down. They were going to pull me away from Manny, and then I’d... I shut the thoughts down.
I would not leave her. Even if that meant having to hide out, or having to kill these men... I would not leave her. She was the only thing that made everything else make sense. That made anything worth it, and I would not allow myself to get pulled away from the one thing I needed.
I pulled my phone out of my pocket, and this time did what I should’ve done before. I texted my father. “Kids put up pictures of me. Police here. Asking me questions.” Seconds went past before I got his reply, telling me to say nothing, that he would be there shortly.
Manny and my father didn’t get along. I worried that she would be irritated that I called him but I didn’t have another option. With everything going on, I needed someone who could talk with people. I needed someone who could get me out of this, so that I could keep seeing her.
The officers came back into the room. They sat down across from me. Mendez glanced at Wilcox, then back at me. “Becket, why don’t you tell me where the scars came from. It’ll save us a lot of time.”
