“They were supposed to stay rumors,” Callisa said with a watchful eye on Kaelen and Bram. “It was how we were going to take down Theia. Without an ally possessing the moon bolt, we were going to try our best with the elixir.”
“So we need to go to the palace,” I realized.
Elias, who had been quiet up until then, nodded. “The capital of Ixket has been uninhabited for a thousand years, it should be a quick trip through an empty city.”
“Did you ever explore the old capital on your travels?” Eleste asked me softly. Her cheeks glowed in the firelight and made her look younger than her thousand years.
“I did not; I needed to be near enough to others to disappear in a pinch but isolated enough as to not immediately endanger anyone. I have always wanted to, though. Always felt a strange connection to that abandoned city.” I fiddled with the ends of my hair, looking to the tapestry hanging to the left of the fireplace. Warm golds and reds, a fiery autumn scene soothed me while they discussed options.
Bram spelled the book once more, replacing the cover and leaning back with his hip to the table. “So half of us head out to grab the deirach elixir, and the other half train and gather allies here.”
I looked to the others, watching their expressions change with Bram’s words. Carwyn looked concerned, Nerys expressionless, Bastien and Elias determined, Eleste was preoccupied with describing the capital to Corsin. “I’m going,” Azael said, resolutely.
“I don't think that was ever in question,” Bram said softly, looking between us.
“We’re coming as well,” Bastien said as he gestured to himself and Carwyn. She gave me a firm nod, and a tiny reassuring smile.
“I’ll stay behind and write to our allies,” Eleste said, shifting from foot to foot. Corsin took a step back, physically removing himself from selection.
Callisa stood, looking to Azael with a pained expression. “I will stay with Eleste and greet our allies. We need to show strength, and we cannot if too many of us are away.” I gave her a reassuring smile, letting her know that her absence would be missed.
“I would like to go,” Nerys said quietly. I glanced at her in surprise, but she stood tall with conviction. Looking every inch the warrior.
“Then it’s decided,” I tried to sound firm but instead sounded tired. “Azael, Nerys, Carwyn, Bastien, and I will retrieve the elixir from the old capital; you all will stay here and prepare for war.”
I stood in my room that night, staring at the roaring fire.
Who am I to have this enormous responsibility? I am no one to be gifted the moon bolt. What if I fail and Sinaia remains imprisoned? If the others cannot get their powers back, or worse, end up like their deceased brethren? I shuddered. Sitting at the edge of the bed and staring at the cream-colored walls, my thoughts spiraled. My breathing increased; I felt a weight settle onto my chest. My thoughts always lead back to what if I failed? I could not afford to fail. I wouldn’t just let myself down; I’d fail my friends, my goddess.
A slight knock on the door signaled Azael’s entrance. Rather than speaking, he took one glance at me sitting on the bed and walked over to stand in front of me. I wrapped my arms around his trimmed waist, resting my head on his abdomen and letting out a deep sigh. He stroked my hair in a calming manner.
“I’m scared,” I whispered for the first time aloud.
“Any sane person would be,” he murmured as he played with my hair.
I lowered my voice, burrowing my face into his warm shirt. He always wore dark shirts, and he looked amazing in them. His alabaster skin glowed, as did his pale hair.
“Azael.” The shame felt like it would eat me alive, like it had crawled into my skin and made a home there. He waited for me to speak, silently offering me comfort. “I wasn’t able to save my host family. Theia’s guards slaughtered them, murdered them all just to get to me. Their bodies-” I choked up. He stroked my back until I could continue. “I found my host father’s body,” I whispered. “And I couldn’t save them. I wish I could’ve saved them.” I thought back to walking in on them to find my host sister, Amaia, screaming as the man stabbed her through the heart. Of her mama telling me to run, to never look back. The blood had run down her chest in what seemed like buckets, rivulets spraying across the man’s face, and he smiled in glee while he did it. Her mother screamed and cried when she saw me watching through the window and mouthed the words to me. It haunted me, appeared in nightmares and triggers—the red of an apple, the scream of a child, the cry of a mother.
“You didn’t have the powers then that you do now,” he said softly. He used a gentle fingertip to gather the lone tear streaking down my face. I knew this, but still, somehow… hearing it validated by someone else took a small weight from me that I did not realize I was carrying.
I clenched the soft fabric of his shirt into my fists and held him tightly. “What if I can’t do this?” I practically pleaded, begging for reassurance.
“You can do anything you put your mind to, love.” He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight, letting the warmth of the fire at my back and the grip of his arms soothe me.
CHAPTER 16
Eleste handed me a neatly packed basket of cheese and bread. “Are you sure you have everything you need?”
“We’re sure,” Nerys assured her as she tucked daggers into every possible pocket on her person. She was a lover of weaponry and always had at least three blades on her at one time. I couldn’t fathom how she could move without slicing herself, but that was why she was the warrior, and I was the power behind her.
I had practiced using the moon bolt several days in a row, and it did not seem to be tiring. I could use it multiple times in a row, only exhausting around the fifth burst of energy. Corsin dutifully fixed the burning trees, Eleste at his side learning. I felt more confident and ready to take on the monumental task of freeing Sinaia, and taking back their kingdom.
We had met a family in town the other day. It was a small trip, just Callisa and I left to grab a treat for everyone and explore the wares. We ran upon a family displaying a small covert blue and white symbol in their shop window’s upper left corner. We gave them our business and discussed their heritage from the moon kingdom, their uprooted ancestors, which city they initially hailed from. It was an enlightening conversation, being reminded of the thousands of citizens ripped from their homes in the capital and the surrounding towns, to the cities inundated with sun paraphernalia. Just one more casualty of Theia’s arrogance.
“Are you ready?” Bastien asked as he pocketed his signature weapon, a miniature ax. I could not believe at first that of all the weapons, he chose an ax. I understood once I saw his incredible fighting skills. He could hook a man off-balance with one jab, either impaling an opponent or tiring them for hand-to-hand combat.
“I am,” I looked to Azael for confirmation, but he was staring into space. He had been doing that more and more lately, his perfect features looking increasingly tired and weary. I knew he was stressed. This was the culmination of years of dreaming while in prison. Picturing him, locked away and imagining freedom, then coming so close to it a thousand years later… I smoothed the hair back from his face, smiling at the small trio of freckles near his left eye. “It will be fine,” I tried to reassure him. I was but a weapon in a war that I had only just joined, but I hoped that my comfort meant something to him—soothed him somehow.
He gave me a dazzling smile, as his swirling conflicted eyes glowed with affection. “Thank you,” he drawled, smacking a kiss to my forehead, and turning to address the ones we were leaving behind. “We will see you in several days with the deirach elixir. Make sure our allies know we wish we could be here to greet them.” He embraced Callisa and Eleste, offering a nod to the three men, and turned.
I finally decided to ask the question weighing on my mind before we left for our journey. “Why do the gods not intervene?”
“Petty squabbles between sisters,” Bram said quietly, “do not constitute divine in
tervention by the other gods. The other gods and goddess have sworn not to get involved in each other's affairs.”
“But Corsin?”
“Corsin was born of the earth goddess and is, therefore, a minor god and does not count. Emissaries are allowed as well.”
“And they’re not sending those, why? They’re sitting in their ivory towers so far removed from society that they would leave us to suffer the actions of one of their own?”
“That is how it has been, and likely how it will always be,” Kaelen said gruffly. “Now be gone and be safe,” he stepped back to stand by Bram as everyone else began the long walk to our destination.
“Are you sure here is the best place?” Carwyn looked on skeptically. “The trees are so thick we’ll have to sleep in groups.”
“There’s a hot spring,” Bastien explained, looking awfully proud of himself for his find. I, for one, was ecstatic. My muscles ached, and I so desperately wanted to soak and relax. A day of traveling had a way of making even the most cheery person tired. I was covered in sweat, caked in dirt, and had tiny scratches from the many branches and brambles we navigated through.
Nerys had it the worst. She tripped and fell into the mud earlier on and had been walking with her dark clothes and hair caked in dirt for hours; she would probably go for a rain puddle at this point.
“Nerys, why don’t you go bathe, and we’ll set up camp?” I offered, already setting down my things. She reluctantly nodded, and took off between the trees.
Several hours later, the sun was almost finished setting. Dusk covered the clearing, and the others began yawning, warm and comfortable after their trips to the hot springs. I had wanted to go last, enjoying the view of the darkening sky against the water. I gathered my clothes, making sure my bedroll was ready for the night, and headed through the tightly packed trees to the hot springs.
The water was warm and soothing; I sunk into it, closing my eyes and listening to the sounds of nature around me, until I felt a disturbance in the water. I opened my eyes to see Azael sitting across from me. The rocky outcrop he was sitting on was higher than mine, and I could see a great deal of his chest, of the trail of hair leading downwards.
‘Azael,” I said, like I was upset, like I was surprised.
“Aeryn,” he smirked. Like he knew all of my secrets.
“Why are you here?” I asked him like I didn’t know. Like I couldn’t see the need in his eyes, reflected in his tight muscles and clenched hands.
“Thought you weren’t a fan of games, love.” He stood, wading through the water, and coming to stand in front of me. I admired every carved pale section of his body, dripping with water and highlighted in the last of the fading light.
“I’m not.”
“Then don’t pretend that you don’t want this.”
I stood, baring myself to him, and relished in his deep groan. Taking one step forward, I aligned our bodies. I was tired of fighting him, of denying both him and myself. It was clear he respected me, valued me. I was no mere toy to him; that was all I ever wanted to establish. It wouldn’t compromise the mission to give in to his magnetic allure, his commanding personality.
I do not think he knew how drugging his proximity was. His presence crowding my personal space, his warm, defined body against mine. I inhaled sharply at the feel of his wet body against mine, catching his signature scent of oak and wood smoke. I ran my lips along his neck, darting my tongue out and tasting his salty skin. Now he was the one shivering in ecstasy. I reached his ear and whispered, "like what you feel?"
He shuddered again, tightening his hands on my hips, flexing imperceptibly as he stifled a moan. He grabbed my chin, and pressed his lips to mine. It was a desperate kiss, warm and wet, deep and fervent. I attempted to take over by stroking my tongue along his lips, but he grabbed a fistful of my hair and gently pulled my head to the side. He took back control, drawing sips from my mouth, running his lips, tongue, and teeth over every inch. I ran my hands along his back, stroking his defined shoulder blades and spine and pulling his body tighter against mine. I broke away from his mouth and ran light kisses along his jaw before trailing my tongue along his neck and giving his salty warm skin, hot wet kisses. I was rewarded with a deep moan as he nuzzled his face against my hair. He emitted a low groan and brought his mouth back to mine, kissing me harder, his tongue lightly lapping at the seam of my mouth before I allowed him entrance.
I slid my hand slowly down his chest, teasing him with what was to come. He rasped the words I never thought I’d hear from his mouth. “Please, Aeryn… Please, fuck.” I loved hearing him beg, craved it. I wanted to see him fall apart for me.
I finally came upon what I was looking for, wrapping a hand around his thick base and giving him firm long strokes. He came apart in my hands, giving his attention to my chest and making a deep guttural sound. He pressed hot kisses to each breast, using just a hint of his teeth on my stiff nipples, then soothing them with his tongue. Then he moved to my shoulders, pressing kisses along my collarbone, using his tongue to trace shapes on my wet skin. The water lapped with our movements, the sky was barely lit now, and shadows caressed his body. I stroked harder, listening to him pant and gasp in my arms, and steadied myself as one of his fingers delved lower, stroking me slowly. He rocked into my grip, pressing his arousal against me in a desperate attempt to gain more friction. He rubbed his fingers faster, dipping one inside and pumping slowly. Beginning to alternate between stroking my bundle of nerves and my inner walls, he caused spasms of delight to ricochet through me. I moaned, grabbing him close to me and riding his fingers as I stroked him. I shivered, feeling the pleasure hit me fast and hard.
“Goddess, Azael. Just like that,” I moaned in his arms, feeling my body begin to tremble.
He groaned, “Aeryn, fuck, I’m going to-,” and trailed off with a broken moan.
His lean body shuddered as his release hit him, tremors racked his stomach, and he gripped me tightly to him. His fingers moved faster, and he worked me higher and higher until I finally came with a shout. We stood in each other's embrace, panting and sweat covered, the water crashing in small waves against our spent bodies.
He pulled me to him, holding me tightly for several moments before giving a low laugh.
“What?”
“You’re full of surprises, love.” He remarked, a beautiful smile spread across his face. I was happy to give him that, to take away the tension sitting under his eyes and in the brackets of his mouth.
He came with me to my bedroll that night. I followed behind him, like the very first time we met—several paces behind but with none of the unanswered questions, the unresolved anger, and angst.
"You really think we can do this?" I asked as I spread out the blankets. There was no discussion of if he would join me. It was unspoken—the fierce determination in his eyes, the affection, the trip tomorrow to his old home. I wanted to be a source of comfort.
He lay beside me, taking my hand in his and stroking it softly.
"When she killed my brother... when I watched Alaric die before me then have his power slowly drained. I thought I wanted to die."
I sucked a breath in. Gripped his hand tighter and tried not to picture a world without him in it. But I let him speak, let him get the words out.
"I promised myself, that I would do everything in my power to avenge his death. To avenge the deaths of my friends. Then seeing Sinaia, the goddess who raised me and filled my life with opportunities, struck down and incapacitated by her sister? Broken by grief from losing her children?" His voice trembled. "It was the hardest thing I've ever had to watch, the worst thing that has ever happened to me."
I hated hearing his pain, the strain in his voice. "So we can do this. We will take the kingdom back, we will free Sinaia and get revenge for the loved ones that have been lost." He looked me in my eyes, stroking my hair back from my face and resting his thumb against my cheek. "I believe in you. I believe that you can avenge them. So believe in yourself."
"Anything for you, love," he smirked. His smirk faltered with his groan. "Much as I want this, we need to rest up for tomorrow."
"Fucking finally!" Bastien yelled from his spot behind the trees.
I buried my face into Azael's chest as I shook with laughter.
"Sorry we were keeping you up, Bastien." Azael retorted between snickers. I felt my face heat from embarrassment but shook it off, allowing myself a moment of levity before the seriousness of tomorrow.
He stroked my hair softly, letting me drift off in his comforting embrace. We slept huddled together that night, his warm body curled around mine, and we woke tangled in my blankets, sleepy and satisfied.
CHAPTER 17
We navigated through the winding streets; vines and earth spilled between the cracks in the cobblestones and grew spiderwebbed over the surface of the ground. The decrepit houses were being reclaimed by the earth, crumbling and falling apart. Somebody had since stolen all of the belongings inside. The dwellings were designed around the palace, and though aging, the theme was apparent. A beautiful light sandstone covered the pathways, and sparkling filaments were embedded in the structures so that they gleamed when the sun struck them. Though, I’m sure they reflected better in the moonlight, as intended. Growing up in the sun kingdom, it was strange seeing this empty city that I felt such a strong kinship with.
"We used to eat here every week," Azael said, pointing at a crumbling brick alehouse to the left.
Bastien smiled cheekily. "Can't imagine why we got asked to leave."
"Oh, you can't, can you? It couldn't possibly be because you somehow managed to exceed your tolerance and stand up on the table to sing a bawdy tune?"
Daughter of Retribution (Crescent Queen Book 1) Page 13
