by Lexi Wilson
“Thank you for doing that. I was going to get her a dog, you know. I’m not sure when, but I really was going to. I feel bad that you gave your dog to her.”
“Oh, the moment Toby met Allie it was love at first sight. I knew right away that I had lost that dog for good. I don’t blame him, though. I felt the same when I saw the two of you too. Now come on, let’s go. You have a daughter to see.”
We packed the bags into the car and made our way back. We put the radio on and drove in silence. All the while I kept thinking about what Jaxon had said. It was the second time that he had said the word ‘love’ to me, and I still hadn’t said it back to him. I wasn’t sure what was stopping me, but I was glad that he wasn’t pushing me for an answer. The whole thing was crazy too, because I was obviously in love with him back, yet the words just wouldn’t come out of my mouth.
We arrived late at the motel and checked in. We both fell asleep the moment we hit the bed, then woke up when his alarm went off in the early hours of the morning. As we were getting ready to go I could feel my heart thumping in my chest. I couldn’t believe that I was finally on my way to see my daughter. We stopped for a quick sandwich and a coffee on the way, and then I waved goodbye to my old life as I stepped back into the new life I had created.
The moment I saw the familiarity of the town, I felt overwhelmed by a sense of happiness, as well as the same sense of safety that I had felt the first time. This place was home to me. I knew it then and I knew it now even more. We drove straight to Lisa’s place, and then Jaxon helped me to the front door. We knocked, and I was greeted by a very happy Lisa, who gave me a huge hug before helping me into the house. I stepped in and grinned when I saw Allie sitting in the living room with Toby on her lap.
“Hi, darling,” I said to her.
She turned around and gasped. “Mommy!’ she yelled as she came running toward me.
“Careful,” Lisa said. “Don’t squeeze your mom too hard. She’s still in pain.”
I shook my head. “Nah, it’s okay. Squeeze all you like. This is the sort of pain I can handle. This is worth it.”
“You’re home now!” Allie said.
“I’m home now.”
“Forever?” Allie asked.
I smiled at her. She had never looked more beautiful to me in my entire life. “Oh yeah. Forever. They can’t get rid of us now,” I said as I flashed Lisa and Jaxon a smile.
“Please don’t go away again, Mommy. I missed you.” Allie was crying now, and I bent down slowly to wipe away her tears. Everything I had done up until this moment had been to keep her safe. And now here we were. Finally and truly safe.
“I missed you too, Allie. I missed you too.”
Chapter 35
Jaxon
My mother came back home with us to give us a hand. Allie would not let Kaylee go, and held onto her with all her might. We kept telling her that Kaylee was here to stay now, but she refused to let her mother go. She was also very nervous in the car, especially as she knew her mother had been in a car accident. But once we were back home she was back to her old self. We got her things out of the car, and we thought she’d be happy to see all her old stuff again, but she was strangely subdued while looking at it. She was happy about one or two things, but she barely wanted to look at the rest. I frowned, and knelt down to talk to her.
“What’s going on, Allie? Don’t you like your things? They’re from your old house. Your mommy went to get them for you.”
She shook her head. “I like this house.”
I smiled. “And this is the house you’ll stay in. Don’t worry, you’re not going to go back to that old house ever again.”
Her eyes widened. “I won’t?”
“You won’t.”
“What… what…” she started crying. “What about Bill?”
I gasped. It was the first time I’d ever heard her mention Bill’s name. I hadn’t realized she really understood who he was. But she was almost 4 now. I should’ve known she was old enough to know. Did she think that was where her mother had gone when she was away? Was that why she was so nervous?
“Bill can’t hurt you anymore,” I said to her. “Or your mom. You are never going to see Bill again.”
She leaned over and hugged me. “I love you,” she said.
My heart thumped in chest. “I love you too, Allie.”
At that moment, Kaylee walked in and frowned at us. I mouthed at her that everything was fine.
“Allie isn’t too sure about her old stuff. She’s put a pile here of the things she wants, but she’s not sure about the other stuff. Memories, and all that,” I said flippantly, so that we didn’t dredge up the tears again.
Kaylee looked startled. Then she nodded. “Well, how about we give some of the other stuff to charity, then.”
Allie nodded. “Okay. That will be nice. Mommy, I’m so tired now.”
“It’s been a long day. How about we get you into some pajamas and straight into bed?”
“Can you sleep with me, please?”
“Of course I can, darling. I could do with some sleep myself.”
“Okay, here’s what I’m going to do,” I said. “I’m going to get the two of you all set up. You can watch some TV with snacks and tea, and then you can fall asleep whenever you’re too tired to watch more. And, Toby can sleep in the bed with you this time.”
Allie jumped up with excitement. “Like a sleepover?”
“Like a sleepover,” I said.
I set them up, and then tucked them in bed. I gave Kaylee some more painkillers, but I was pleased to see that she was taking less than usual. She was definitely on the mend. I went over to Allie and gave her a big kiss, then I went over to Kaylee and gave her a big kiss too.
“You can join us if you want,” she said.
I smiled. “No, this is your time with Allie. Anyway, my mom is still here. I’m going to go and spend a bit of time with her. I’m putting this spare phone here next to the bed, though. If you need anything at any time of the night, even if it’s just some help going to the bathroom, you call me. Okay?”
“Okay. Thank you so much. For everything.”
“No problem. I’m happy that you’re both home. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Jaxon.”
“Goodnight, Kaylee.”
“Goodnight, Jaxon. I love you,” Allie said, and Kaylee’s eyes widened at the words.
I smiled. “I love you too, Allie. Goodnight.”
I closed the door and then made my way downstairs. I made some tea for my mom and I and then the two of us sat down at the kitchen table to drink. I took out a box of cookies, and handed her one.
“Thanks, darling.”
“Sorry that took so long. I set the two of them up in the room. Or three of them, should I say. Toby joined too.”
My mother laughed. “Naturally. I’m so glad you’re both back now,” she said.
“I’m happy to be back. Mom, thank you so much for taking Allie in like that. I know she’s not your daughter or anything, but it means a lot to me that you went out of your way to help her like that. It really does. She thinks the world of you.”
“She’s such a good girl. I would do anything for her,” my mother said.
“Yeah, you and me both. She told me that she loved me now.”
“Kaylee?” my mother gasped.
“No, Allie.”
“Oh, wow. That’s a big deal.”
“It sure is.”
“Jaxon, are you ready to tell me the full story?” my mother asked.
I nodded. “I am. I’m sorry for keeping you in the dark all this time. I didn’t want Allie to know the full story. But, as you know, Bill came back for Kaylee. He managed to get into this house. Knocked her on the head and dragged her to his car. I had been in my room at the time. I was on a phone call to Styles. Which means that Bill had been watching us this whole time. That’s the only way he could’ve known that she was alone.”
“Oh no, that’s horrible. Thank go
odness Allie was with me.”
“I know. I’m so grateful. I would hate to think how differently this all could’ve gone if Allie was here too. Anyway, he was taking her back to their old place, taking all sorts of funny routes to get there. He was planning on stopping at a motel on the way too, because it’s a bit of a long drive. He was drunk, though. Kaylee said he had been drinking whiskey in the car and that he was getting drunker as they drove. She said he would stop the car and hit her now and again too. Can you believe it?” I shuddered. I hated thinking about what she had gone through. “What a monster. Anyway, she said he then started talking about how he wanted to get Allie too, and how they were going to be a family. She said he was raving like a lunatic. So, she took the wheel and swerved it. She wasn’t sure what she was doing, but she just knew that she had to find a way to stop him from ever getting to Allie.”
“Even if that meant hurting herself,” my mother concluded.
“Don’t be mad at her, Mom. She was only doing what she thought was right for Allie.”
“Oh darling, I could never be mad at her for that. I’m a mother myself, remember. I would do anything for you too. I understand why she did that. But she didn’t die. Oh, thank goodness she didn’t die.”
“No, but Bill did.”
“Bill died?” my mother gasped.
“He did. She’s free, Mom. She’s finally free from him.”
“Oh wow, that’s quite a thing to go through, though. She must be struggling with her emotions through all of this. I know she’s probably glad that he’s gone out of her life, but I know she’s the sort of girl who probably thinks that she caused his death. She didn’t know. He was drunk. He was driving recklessly. He’s the one who kidnapped her. I hope she understands that.”
“I’m trying to get her to realize that it wasn’t her fault,” I said. “She’s struggling a bit with that one, and the guilt of feeling happy that he’s gone. I can understand that. But I told her that every time she feels guilty she must think of what she has done for Allie. Anyway, she’s home now. Mom, that man was horrible. We went back to their old place now to get some stuff and to make sure that all the photos were gone.”
“Photos?” my mom asked.
“Oh, I never told you about the photos.”
I filled my mother in on all the details while she listened on in astonishment. I knew that Kaylee wouldn’t mind if my mother knew the truth, especially after everything that my mother had helped her with.
“She’s going to be fine now,” my mother said. “She’s safe here with you. And I’m proud of you, my boy. You never gave up on her. You helped her the whole time because you knew it was the right thing to do.”
“Thanks, Mom. I think it’s going to take a long time for Kaylee to be fully healed, though. Maybe even years. But I’m prepared to be there for them both.”
“You’re in love with her, aren’t you?” my mom asked.
I nodded. “Madly in love.”
“Good,” she said. “I approve of this one. She feels like family to me.”
I smiled at my mother. “Me too. Mom, seeing as though I’ve been so honest with you now, I think it’s time that you were honest with me, too.”
My mother frowned. “What do you mean? I’m always honest with you.”
I smiled. “Really? Are you sure about that?”
“What on earth do you mean?” she said.
I chuckled. “Okay, well, I hope I’m not completely wrong here, but I have a feeling that I’m not. Mom, what is going on between you and Mindy?”
My mother’s face went so red I couldn’t help but laugh. “What do you mean? Nothing is going on.”
“Why is your face so red, then?”
“Because…well…because…”
“Mom, why don’t you just tell me? Something is going on between the two of you. I know it. Hell, even Kaylee knows it.”
“Kaylee?”
“She picked up on it. She asked me if the two of you were a couple. It’s something I’ve wondered myself, but I didn’t dare ask you. I figured if you weren’t telling me anything then you either weren’t a couple, or else you were waiting for the right time to tell me. But you are, aren’t you? The two of you are together.”
My mother looked down at her tea, then back at me and nodded. “I love her,” my mother said. “She loves me too.”
“Mom, that’s wonderful. Why didn’t you tell me this before?” I asked her.
“You don’t mind?” she asked in surprise.
I laughed. “Why would I mind?”
“Because, well, it’s not your father. And, well, Mindy is a woman.”
I chuckled. “So what? We’re living in a new era now. These things don’t matter to me anymore.”
“And the church, I’m worried…”
“Mom, don’t you dare let anyone stand in the way of your happiness. If you and Mindy are in love, then you need to be proud about it. Don’t hide in case someone doesn’t agree with you. There will always be people out there who don’t. But if she makes you happy, then that is the only thing that is important. Be proud of it. I love Mindy, anyway. She’s always felt like a second mother to me. I’m happy with this news.”
Relief washed over my mother’s face, and a few tears slid down her cheeks. “Oh, darling. You make me so happy, you know that. Sometimes I’m not sure who is the kid and who is the parent. Thank you for understanding. Mindy is going to be so happy. She’s been wanting me to tell you for so long, but I just didn’t know how.”
“Tell Mindy that I’m obviously not as stupid as you both think I am. No, actually, tell her that the two of you were clearly not nearly as secretive as you thought. It was obvious to me, and it will probably be obvious to everyone else. You’re great together. I love you, Mom.”
“I love you too. Everything is going to work out just fine.”
I nodded. “I think so too.”
We sat for a while longer just chatting and getting to know each other again. There were a few things that my mother and I hadn’t spoken about, and one of them was my inability to have children. I had always assumed that my mother was disappointed in me even though it wasn’t my fault. She obviously wasn’t, but it was good to get it all out. By the end of the day I felt even closer to her than I had been before. She gave me a big hug and told me to keep her posted. I promised her that I would have her over soon, but only if she arrived holding Mindy’s hand. She chuckled and promised that she would.
When she was gone, I went upstairs to check on the girls. The TV was still on but the two of them were fast asleep. I laughed when I saw how spread out Allie was and how squished Kaylee was in the corner of the bed. This time though, I knew that Kaylee wouldn’t mind. I switched the TV off, then quietly made my way to Allie’s room to sleep. I was going to go to my own room, but I figured it would be better if I was near in case they called out and needed me.
Chapter 36
Kaylee
When Sunday rolled around, Jaxon went to church. This time he didn’t ask me if I wanted to come with him, and I could see that he was struggling with the decision to go himself. I was glad when he decided to go, though. Just because I had problems with the church didn’t mean I wanted him to stop going. Anyway, my problems were never with the church itself, but rather the memories that they brought for me. Perhaps one day I would go again, but I still had a long way to go until then. The memories were too fresh in my mind at the moment, and I didn’t want anything to remind me of them. I was grateful that Jaxon wasn’t forcing me to go and deal with it. He knew that things took time.
Instead, I sat outside on a blanket in the yard. I read my book while Allie worked on a puzzle that Lisa had gotten for her. She’d been playing with Toby before that, but the dog was so exhausted that he was now stretched out on the blanket near me. I chuckled every time I saw him. Only Allie could tire out a dog like that. She had more energy than myself, Jaxon, and Toby put together. She was concentrating hard on the puzzle now, determine
d to get it right. If I tried to help her she wouldn’t let me. She wanted to prove that she could do it on her own. I smiled at her. She was growing up, that was for sure. Her 4th birthday would be here in a month’s time and I was so glad that we were finally going to celebrate it the way I had always wanted to. Her past three birthdays had not been celebrated at all. I never mentioned her birthday to Bill, just in case he used it as an excuse to drink more or pay her too much attention. I had always tried to shelter her from him, even if it meant that she didn’t get to experience what other little girls her age were experiencing.
It was still hard to believe that we were finally free. Sometimes I would hear a noise in the house and I would jump up in fright. Then I’d remember that Bill could no longer hurt us, and I’d breathe a sigh of relief. I wondered when that fear would go away for good. I had lived with it for so long that it was hard to imagine never feeling it again. The fear seemed to lessen with every day that passed by, though.
The lawyer was keeping me up to date with the estate and the sale of the house. I was looking forward to finally selling that place, and I was so glad that I would have money of my own to put aside for Allie. Knowing that I was doing something for her future made me finally feel like the sort of parent I had always wanted to be for her. The phone rang in the house, and I told Allie to carry on playing while I answered it. She looked scared at first, but then relaxed when she realized she could still see me inside. I moved the phone so that I could still wave to her.
“So, you’re just selling the house, then? You’re not even consulting us?”
I gasped as I realized it was Bill’s mother on the other end of the phone call. I hadn’t heard from her in such a long time, but her voice was unmistakable. She had a very shrill voice that only got more piercing when she was angry. It was one of the first things I had noticed about her when I had first met her. I remember being scared of her and her husband because they were both so unfriendly, and I could always tell that they didn’t like me. But I no longer felt scared of them. I realized that I felt very little for them. I perhaps felt a little sorry for them, but that was it.
