by Lacuna Reid
It’s hard to deal with these thoughts, considering how much I care about each of the guys, even after such a short space of time here… Maybe I’m just prone to paranoia because of how I grew up, because of how my father treated me… how Cliff treated me. The people closest to me have always caused me the most pain, whether they realized it or not. I hope I’m wrong. I hope this time’s different… but something’s not right here. Something’s missing.
After a few laps, I get out of the pool and dry off. Then I head back to my room, feeling like I need to check over my shoulder the whole time. I lock my door and lose myself in a romance novel for a few hours, trying to shake all the fear out of my mind, but it keeps coming back to me. Tiala is in my head and she won’t leave me alone.
I try to piece together everything I know about her. She was a teenager, here over a summer, with her family… could it have been her family that did it? Her father? I know that statistically, it often is. There’s some disturbing figure that says girls and women are most likely to be murdered by their fathers or their husbands or boyfriends. In my dream, she wanted Theo, she wanted me to reject him so that he would be hers. She loves Theo... Would she love him, even if he caused her death?
There’s a knock at the door and I’m jolted out of my thoughts. I’m mildly terrified about who might be there, but from checking the peephole, it turns out to be just Gino.
“Hi… sorry, just getting dressed,” I call through the door.
Gino laughs. Of course, he’s here to collect me for dinner. Gino is always so punctual. I didn’t even realize it was so late. The time must have slipped away while I was reading and freaking out. I’d taken off my swimsuit earlier, but I hadn’t bothered putting anything else on.
I throw on the first bra I find and the forest green dress from Theo. It might be strange to wear a dress Theo bought me on a date with Gino, but everything is a little bit strange in El Cielo. As everyone keeps saying: the rules are different here.
My other clothes – the ones I brought with me when I came here – seem like they’ll be too casual for the ever-impeccably-dressed Gino, and I also can’t find anything of my own that isn’t crumpled and dirty. I need to remember to put laundry out. I can’t find any underwear, so I give up and just go commando… the rules are different at El Cielo after all. I hope he’s not actually taking me out to a fancy restaurant.
When I open the door, Gino’s eyes light up.
“How is it that you always look so radiant?” he asks, kissing me on both cheeks.
“Maybe because I was rushing,” I admit.
“And everything you wear looks stunning on you,” Gino says. “Is that dress silk?”
I smile and nod, relieved that I don’t look like a cheap, rumpled mess. Gino takes my hand and walks me downstairs.
“Where are we going?” I ask.
“It’s a surprise, mi amore.”
I follow him down to the ground floor, and I’m relieved that we aren’t leaving El Cielo, when instead of heading out towards the lobby, he takes a different path through the main building, one I haven’t taken before.
Gino leads me outside to a small courtyard, draped in vines, at the back of the building. It’s somewhere I must have walked past many times from the outside, on my way to the kitchen gardens, but the vines growing all around make it invisible… and private. There’s a table, set for two. I notice the sky is darkening to dusk. Gino lights the candles on the table. Then he turns to me.
“Do you like it?”
“I love it!”
“I thought so,” he says, pulling me into a sexy embrace. My mound presses up against his thigh through our clothing, and I notice my own distinct lack of panties.
“But what are we eating?” I ask, feeling suddenly famished.
“Calista is making her famous roast lamb,” Gino says.
“Sounds perfect.”
I turn towards him and kiss him, softly, gently, deeply. I had expected Gino to do something flashier for our dinner, but this was much more my style, and somehow he knew that.
Gino is good at reading people… someone told me that once, maybe it was Theo.
He pulls out a seat for me at the table, and then pours red wine into glasses and hands me one. “From the vineyard we had lunch at,” he says.
Recalling our trip to the hypnotherapist just reminds me of Gino’s reticence to sleep with me, and I wonder whether he’s finally letting down his boundaries.
I smile, thinking about all the things I want him to do to me, and take a sip of the wine. It’s deep and fruity with notes of cherry and oak… or at least that’s what I’d write on the bottle if someone gave me that job.
“So, tell me, Mira… well… tell me anything you feel comfortable sharing.”
I outline the basics for Gino about what I saw in the regression – the French life when I was Émilie, and that last day of my life where everything went wrong.
Gino lowers his gaze.
“I’m sorry, Mira,” he says. “I was foolish. We all were. Had we been more careful, you might have lived.”
“I don’t think so,” I say.
“What do you mean?”
I tell him about Cliff showing up, about the fight we’d had.
“I don’t remember that part,” Gino says.
“You might have missed it,” I think, remembering how drunk the Medieval French Gino had been in my memory.
“This is the same ex who is causing you problems now, no?”
I nod.
“So, he is repeating lives with us too.” There is an expression of shock on Gino’s face.
Calista takes that moment to appear with a tray of food. It smells divine. There’s roast lamb with fresh focaccia and bowls of olives and cheeses and roasted vegetables. It’s almost enough to distract me from the shock on Gino’s face.
He turns and thanks Calista warmly, and then, when she leaves, he returns to looking concerned.
“What?” I ask.
“It shouldn’t surprise me,” Gino said. “We all have other lives too… lives where we haven’t been together, lives where we have been close to other people.”
“We do?” I only have the two past life memories to go on, but Gino has had multiple regressions.
“I’m just surprised that this man continues to be antagonistic to you across these lives when you’ve come here to be with us.”
It’s a strange thought that I came here – into this life – specifically to be with these guys, but it’s kind of cute. I smile.
“What?” Gino asks.
“Is that what I came into this life for?”
“I think there is more to it,” Gino says, “but I haven’t worked it all out yet.”
“Well, there’s more to the story with Cliff too,” I say. “He was possibly in the Greek life.”
Gino’s eyes widen and I tell him about my dream of being chased by Cliff… before everything went black.
“This is of great concern, mi amore,” Gino says.
I nod. Cliff is of great concern… that is definitely the case from my perspective.
“And this man has been sending you messages still? Gifts?”
“Yes, I thought I saw him last night, too, Gino, at the dinner party. It was probably just my imagination.”
“I can check the security footage for you, if you like.”
“Thank you,” I say, helping myself to lamb and vegetables. I take a big bite of roasted pepper and the fragrant meat. “Mmm, this is delicious!”
“Calista is an excellent cook.”
I’m absorbed in eating for a while, and I almost forget to ask Gino about the other concern I have.
“Gino, there’s something else,” I say when I’m probably too full to keep going, but can’t stop picking at the tasty food.
Gino gives me his full attention, leaning towards me, gazing at me with those compelling green eyes. A pang of desire courses through me, and if it wasn’t for feeling too full to comfortably move, I’
d want nothing more than to devour him too.
“Yes?” he asks.
“Tiala,” I say.
Gino’s face darkens, but his expression is unreadable.
“Who told you?”
I don’t want to get Helio in trouble, so I try to evade the question.
“She came to me in a dream – another dream,” I say.
“She talked to you?”
“Yes – she was… she was kind of half herself and half the woman from the French life. She was in love with Theo.”
Gino nods.
“She was only a kid, though,” I say, “…in this life.”
“There was a strong connection between them,” Gino says, “but don’t assume the worst.”
“Is that just because you are protecting your friend?” I ask. I think of Theo with the silk ties and the blindfolds. What if something happened between us… what if he went too far and lost control? Is that what happened to Tiala?
“No,” Gino says. “It’s what I honestly believe. Theo fought against her attempts to get close to him. He tried to maintain a distance, especially when he realized she…”
“What? That she was so young?”
“No, that she wasn’t you.”
Theo has been waiting for me all this time… they all have… but does that mean he’s innocent? Does that mean he’s incapable of losing control… or of making the kind of mistake that could end someone’s life?
“I trust Theo,” Gino says. “I won’t tell you what to believe because that is not my place.”
“So, what do you think happened?”
“There was a storm, heavy rain, that night. Tiala ran away. That’s what we think happened. She had an argument with Theo and he rejected her advances… she was upset and she ran out into the rain.”
So much rain.
I nod, and Gino continues.
“My best guess is that she slipped and fell into the river, the one that flows from the lake out to sea,” Gino says.
“She could have been attacked,” I say. “She was so young and vulnerable she could have run anywhere… anyone nearby could have abducted her.”
“That is another possibility,” Gino says, his gaze downcast. “The police considered various options. At least, if she has slipped and drowned, it would have been over quickly.”
There is pain in Gino’s eyes as he looks at me, old pain that has been carved and polished by years and years of going over the details, over the same story… pain that never goes away.
“Did you love her too?”
“In a manner of speaking,” Gino says. “She was a friend. More than that, her family were close to mine. I’d known Tiala all her life. It was a great loss, not just her disappearance…”
“You lost your friendship with the whole family too,” I say.
“And with my own,” Gino says, pouring himself more wine and taking a large sip.
“I’m sorry, that must have been so hard.”
“They wanted vengeance,” Gino says. “They wanted Theo to be charged… or worse. It didn’t matter to them what I thought, or that the police investigation couldn’t find him at fault. They wanted someone to pay.”
“But Tiala is still here,” I say. “She wants something… and maybe she’s finally going to reveal what happened to her.”
Gino’s eyes are filled with curiosity.
“I think she’s the ghost.”
“I don’t believe in ghosts,” Gino says.
“But you said…”
“Spirits, I believe in.” Gino lowers his eyes. “But spirits leave this world and come back in different bodies. I think what is happening here is some kind of emotional imprint.”
“What do you mean?”
“Perhaps emotional energy has been left behind from a traumatic event.”
There is a chill in the air. I don’t really know what Gino means, but I can tell he is ready to stop talking about the topic.
I inhale the scent in the air or dry earth just as the rain drops start to fall.
“Petrichor,” I say.
Gino smiles. “You remember,”
“I’ve been wondering…” I say. “What other favorite words have you collected?”
The rain is bucketing down now, thick and heavy.
“Pluviophile.”
“What does that mean?”
“Lover of rain,” Gino says, as the rain drops fall thick and heavy, just beyond the courtyard.
“Perfect.”
“Speaking of perfect,” Gino says, standing up and holding out his hand for me. “Would you like to dance in the rain?
A thrill runs through me.
“Yes!” I take Gino’s hand and he leads me out into the heavy downpour. We dance together. Spinning each other around and laughing like teenagers.
I’m used to Gino being refined and suave. I’m not used to seeing him so wild and free… and I love it.
Gino pulls me close and then looks at me with those deep forest-green eyes and says, “Would you like to take this inside?”
Forward… I like forward.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Mira
My whole body is tingling with anticipation. If kissing Gino is anything to go by, then fucking him is going to be brilliant, but just as we near my apartment he pulls back again.
“Mira, I…”
Not this time, Mister…
I wrap my wet arms around Gino’s drenched shoulders and whisper, “I have a secret.”
“What is it?”
“I’m not wearing any underwear.”
It works like a charm. Gino can’t help himself. He pushes me up against the wall and kisses me passionately, and I can tell there’s no going back now. We need each other with a burning hunger that will not be sated any other way.
We’re barely through the doorway of my apartment when Gino grabs me and kisses me again, unzipping my soaking wet dress and undoing my bra with his strong, graceful hands without breaking contact with my lips.
I follow suit, pulling at his damp clothes, undoing his shirt buttons, tugging at his fly and briefs, freeing his long, gorgeous cock with a kink in the end that looks like it was made to perfectly hit just the right spot.
He peels my soaking wet silk dress down my body until it slides to the floor and Gino sighs, as if he’s drinking me in with his eyes.
“You weren’t lying about the no-panties thing,” he says. Pulling me into another mesmerizing kiss. He slides his hand down to my pussy and groans when he realizes how wet I am.
His fingers inside me feel good… too good. I can’t believe we’re finally doing this…
I can tell Gino is not going to make excuses this time. Whatever was holding him back has slipped away and he’s ready for me.
I break away from the kiss and take in the sight of him. His perfect Adonis body makes me feel like I’m in the midst of a photo-shoot. Only, I get to play. Gino has a look in his eyes that suggests he’s more than willing for me to play with him, and I’m feeling dominant.
I push him down onto my bed and climb on top of him. I can’t help but bask in the delightful feeling of his silky-smooth skin against mine. He runs his fingers lightly down my spine, bringing with them the feeling of running water, a stream, a waterfall, rain… I sigh and grind myself against him.
“Wait a moment, cara mia…”
He gets up and reaches into the pocket of his trousers and pulls out a condom. I love how considerate these men all seem to be about safe sex.
My mouth waters as he rolls it on. Then, despite the fact that he’s sheathed and ready to go, he focusses all his attention on me, stroking me delicately, making me lose my mind, squirming in my own plentiful juices.
I look Gino in the eyes and see, not the perfect, self-assured, confident Gino… but a side of him I’ve never seen before, a side that is clearly broken and hurting and hungry for me all at the same time.
“Gino?”
“Yes?”
“Will you
speak Italian to me while you fuck me?
“My pleasure, mi amore.”
Gino lunges at me, as the dulcet sounds of fluent Italian flow from his mouth, as he runs his hands all over my body and through my hair.
Oh… my… Gods…
I’m so high on Gino that it’s like I’ve died and gone to heaven, or the spirit world, or whatever… but a tension is building inside me and I need to quench my thirst. I push Gino back down onto the bed and straddle him again.
He sighs in approval as I move his hands aside, and without breaking eye contact, I position myself over him and slowly, slowly lower myself down… enveloping him inch by inch. He groans, tipping his head back and reaches for my breasts, as if he needs them to anchor himself. I slowly rise, looking him in the eye again, and then this time, I fall, hard and fast, taking him deep inside. He moans and grabs for my hips, losing control of himself as he pumps me against him, hitting my g spot perfectly, over and over, bringing me close to the edge, ravenous like a wild animal. He pulls me down towards him and kisses me, roughly, deeply, powerfully, biting my lower lip as I come up for air.
Our concentration merges into a single point of pleasure between us. As I watch Gino’s face, I can see him let his guard down entirely.
I can see everything now as though this intimacy has brought me second-sight. I can see right into Gino’s mind, into his spirit. I can see his broken dreams… his broken heart.
Chapter Thirty
Mira
We lie in bed together, breathing in unison, listening to the rain fall outside and patter against the windows.
Many moments pass, bleeding into one-another. I’ve lost all sense of time until I feel another pang of guilt in my gut.
“Gino,” I turn to him.
“Yes, mi amore.”
“You remember some of the times we were together in the other lives?”
“You mean, when we were together… intimately, more than one of us was with you at once?”
