by Grant Hunter
I showered all the filthiness off me, and felt satisfied leaving the water running extra-long, knowing that Joy would have to pay the bill. I grabbed the man’s shampoo – probably from Josh, or that freak from upstairs – and washed my hair. Even when I got out of the shower, I let the water run, while I brushed my teeth. Slowly I put on my bathrobe, and finally turned the water of.
In my room, I plopped on the bed and phoned Gabriel. He picked his mobile up, after seven rings, and he listened attentively, coughing occasionally.
‘So, Naomi. If I understand correctly you are looking for a place to stay?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Right now?’
I hummed.
‘Well, it’s your lucky day. You know that boss of mine, from the pizza place where I work…’
‘Yes?’
‘He moved in with his girlfriend last month, but he wants to keep his own flat I believe, just in case.’
‘Oh, so it’s empty?’
‘If you want, I’ll talk to him about it, and ask if you can temporarily rent the space. It’s not big, though.’
‘Doesn’t matter.’
‘You know what? I’ll call him right away, OK?’
‘Thank you, Gabe.’
‘Damn it, I almost would ask you to stay with me, but I know I couldn’t behave – as a friend being, ummm?’
I found it almost disappointing that he didn’t ask.
‘Yes, asking me to stay with you would be strange, right?’ I said hesitantly.
‘Forget I mentioned it, Naomi. Speak to you later...’
I put the phone down. But within five minutes he called back. Gabe told me that his boss had no problems with me going to live in his apartment, provided I would find another place within two months.
‘Great! How much is the rent?’ I asked enthusiastically.
‘He is just pleased that a trustworthy person will live in his flat while he is away. He doesn’t ask for a high rent, because he expects you to clean it up, keep it tidy and water his plants.’
That was even better, so I agreed.
‘And Marco wants you to keep an eye on his cat Oliver. He left instructions, how and when to feed him. His new girlfriend is allergic.’
‘No problem!’
‘I agreed to pick up his keys, so that you can get in there right away.’
My heart skipped a beat when he said he would pick me up an hour later. I gazed trough the room. There wasn’t much I would miss here. The window with the far too light curtains certainly not, I thought. Maybe the garden. Definitely the smell of bacon on Sunday mornings.
I shook my head, as if I could wave away the thought of Robin. That bastard! I wouldn’t even say goodbye. I would just move my stuff and not tell them where I was going. I waited by the door, listened carefully and when I heard the bell I ran down the stairs, to prevent Joy or Robin from opening the door.
‘Gabe!’ I clung to his neck when he stepped over the threshold.
‘That’s new. The first time you seem happy to see me.’
I laughed like a hyena, and pointed to the box and the two suitcases that stood at the top of the stairs.
‘OK. Got the message,’ he said, and dragged the two suitcases down.
‘How sweet, thank you,’ I said, ‘I owe you a dinner.’
He winked and smiled at me, while he passed me through the front door, holding the suitcases. ‘Be right back for the boxes,’ he said.
‘Don’t worry, I’ll get them.’
What would I do without him? I thought as I climbed the stairs. I would probably have had to call my father, who would have given me a half-hour sermon on responsibility. I grabbed the box and walked downstairs. Maybe he’d even have me collected by someone.
‘Hello? Are you coming, daydreamer?’ Gabe waved his hand in front of my eyes. With the box in my arms I walked out. I gave them to Gabe, who placed them on the back seat, next to a parcel.
‘The boot is full, so...’
‘Can we go?’
‘Already? Shouldn’t you say goodbye?’
‘Already done,’ I replied, at the same moment as Gabe jumped into the car and started the engine. I turned away from the house, sighed and sat down, next to him.
‘Fuck them all...’ I whispered. Gabe stared at me for a minute, but did not react, than he drove away so quickly that I was forced back into my seat.
‘Hey! Slow down.’
‘Relax. Are you thirsty?’ He grabbed a bottle of Coca Cola from behind him. ‘Here...’
I grabbed it, twisted the cap off and drunk a few mouthfuls. The cola was flat, but I was thirsty, so I drank some more.
‘Thank you.’
From the corner of my eye, I saw him smile while I drank the bottle empty and put it on the dashboard. Then I noticed the strange aftertaste.
‘Was it old?’
He shrugged his shoulders.
‘Hey! Why are you taking the exit to the highway?’
‘I must drop that parcel off at a friend’s first.’ He pointed at the back seat. ‘After that, I’ll take you right away to Mario... err, Marco.’
‘But...’
‘It’s a little bit out of the way.’
The next minute, I felt light-headed. A strange, tingling went through my spine. My mouth was dry. Willingness I stared out of the window, and as I looked at the highway, it seemed the cars on the road began spinning the opposite way, than everything slowed down. I felt the irresistible urge to close my eyes. I blinked and suppressed a yawn.
‘I feel sick,’ I whispered.
Gabe didn’t react. He just kept his eyes on the road. I looked around again, to everything that sped past me. We left the built up area and soon I couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore. Something in me screamed that it wasn’t right, but I couldn't speak, move or think.
29
When I woke my whole body shivered, in places I didn’t even know I had. In that horrible moment, I realised I was lying on an ice-cold floor, and my arms were bound, held together by a piece of rope. Through my hazy vision, I saw that my bare legs and feet looked strange. It was as if they belonged to another person. My skin was covered with bluish patches. A wide white dress hung like a shroud over me. My legs twitched softly.
I heard murmuring in the background. It seemed to come from far away and yet I heard it close by, behind me. It took a while before I realised that it was music.
My cheeks were moist from the tears that flowed freely, resulting from the intense pain and the hopelessness that struck me. The feeling that something was not right. And then I understood it was not due to the pain, but because of the person who had put me in this situation.
The one who had made me trust him. The last I remembered was leaving London, out towards the motorway. How long had we driven? Maybe many hours had passed, maybe even days.
Questions kept haunting me. How long had I been here? Would anyone miss me? Yes of course. What day was it? Sunday? Monday? Yes, that’s it. Or was it already Tuesday? No, it had to be Monday. They would realise I was missing, someone would look for me, that surely must happen. Was he still there? Maybe he was looking at me. That fucking bastard had to have everything planned, I thought. I made me angry and I tried to wipe the tears away, with my shoulder and immediately I could see much more clearly.
I didn’t want to fight anymore, I was tired, tired of what I had to endure, tired of the pain and tired of what was going to come.
Through the music, right behind me, I heard someone creeping closer. A soft tapping of something that was moving forward over the ground, like shoes on a concrete floor.
‘Let me go. They’re looking for me. They’re searching for me,’ I said. My voice sounded weak and dull.
A piercing laugh echoed through the empty space.
‘Let them search.’
‘I’ll have to report at the police station. It’s Monday today. I have to make a statement. They will be looking for me now.’
Would he buy it? Would
he tell me if it was already Monday? I wanted to know.
Something bumped against my legs. An empty oil drum that made a hellish clang and echoed through the enormous space. The place where I lay did not look anything like Marco’s promised apartment . There were no beautiful plants. In this giant, concrete hall there was no green at all. It was full of sawdust and stacked crates. In the corner were machines with a thick layer of dust over them. It looked like a conveyor belt at the back of them.
Not knowing where I was, made me feel sick, but above all the huge size of the place, the gloomy, bare concrete floor, the rough corners and the lack of light - thanks to the boarded up windows - made me feel horrified.
I heard the footsteps approaching.
‘W-Where am I?’
Gabe grabbed a crate and moved over to me, so I could see him. How could I have been so wrong about him? I thought. How could I have given him my confidence so quickly?
Suddenly, I knew with certainty that he had intended to kick the football at my head. I hadn’t even bothered to check if he ever played for a team; I just assumed it.
He was so close that I could feel his breath on my cheeks.
‘We are alone, you and I. In an old factory, in an abandoned industrial area. Don’t get any ideas in that beautiful head of yours. No one will find you here. So save me your attempts at worrying me, it won’t work on me.’
I sobbed, with wracking tears, although I didn’t want to. How did it come to this. ‘W-why me? What have I done?’
He smiled. ‘Save your energy. You’ll need it.’
‘Please, let me go,’ I whispered.
‘Naomi. You know I can’t do that. I will never let you go.’
My sobbing became more intense. Gabriel grinned, he seemed pleased that I was crying. Sniffing, I tried to stop the water that ran from my nose. But when I couldn’t stop, and suddenly his expression changed.
‘Damn! Stop crying. What the fuck are you doing?’
He leaned forward, shook his head, then stood up and grabbed me by the shoulders. I screamed at him as he dragged me over the floor to the left wall, where he pushed me against something that looked like a radiator. He tied my bounded hands to it, with another piece of rope, that already had been placed there.
‘Good girl. I’ll leave this rope looser, so you can sit or lay down.’
I only managed to say ‘Fuck you...’
He smiled, and walked away. I looked at him until his shadow disappeared through a door behind the shed.
With a wild movement, I tried to pull the rope off my hands, but it only seemed to tighten around my wrists. I felt it burn into my flesh, but I kept pulling back and forth, and even though I didn’t feel it right away, my wrists started to hurt so badly I had to stop.
A crackle made me jump up, and I tried to determine where the sound came from. It was a strange noise, different from earlier, echoing through the building, and coming from all angles. It sounded like the crackle that I had heard from old gramophone records, when the needle just touches the disc.
I screwed up my eyes and saw that there were speakers hung on the beams of the high steel ceiling. Suddenly a garish opera sounded through the boxes. Even though I was not a lover of classical music, I recognised this song vaguely.
‘Hi? Hello!’ I screamed, as loud as I could. My head throbbed with the booming music. ‘Is there anyone?’
The music drowned out everything. Suddenly I realised that no one would hear me if they couldn’t hear this loud music. Warm tears ran down my cheeks. The music stopped and another sound echoed through the speakers.
‘Damn it, stop crying! It’s getting really annoying now.’
Slowly I wiped away my tears. How did he know what I did? I thought. He must be watching! When I looked up I saw a camera in every corner.
A wave of anger ran through me. It was as if it washed away all the pain, and a warm glow came over me.
I rubbed my hands back and forth and clenched my teeth.
‘Good girl. I am glad to see you’re trying.’
‘What the fuck do you want from me?’
Again he laughed, high pitched and piercing. ‘Beautiful music, don’t you think?’
I looked up at the camera above me. ‘I wouldn’t play your twisted game.’
The sound of a needle over a record, scratchy, and immediately afterwards an intense beat filled the air. Hard and pervasive;
Boom. Boom. Boom.
30
The idea that Gabe could spy on me, all the time, was almost as unbearable as the pain in my wrists. The volume was turned back up.
‘Ah, I see you enjoy this music. Almost like that night club, right baby? What is it called again? Exxxes or something? Ah, what does it matter. I already knew that you would end up here. But I took my time for you. Man, it was fun. When you fell off your bike. I only had to take a few screws out of it. You were so grateful to see me.’
I heard him laughing out loud. ‘And... and how you thought I accidentally stumbled into that night club. Do you hear the music? The same track as when you first danced with me.’
Rave. Dance. Follow the beat.
He had put the volume back up high and every note was throbbing through me.
Rave.
Like in that night club? That bastard had his eye me for a long time. How could I have been so stupid, so naive?
Dance.
Where did I see him for the first time? Was it really when he kicked that ball into my face? No, I had seen him even before. Gabe had spotted me before that.
Follow….
Where was it? He knew where I was going to run and had waited the moment when I would make a break.
… the beat.
I should have noticed something. Something I could work out where it was wrong.
Rave. Dance. Rave. Dance. Follow. Follow…
Damn it! I thought. The volume was too loud, I couldn't focus. There was a vague reminder of what happened before, the incident with the ball. Of Course, how could I be so stupid! He had been in that dream.
Follow the beat.
Or did I imagine it? Wasn’t it a dream? But What was it? I had seen him, in that horrid dream in which Jen had saved me. No, even before then. That afternoon that Jen, Josh and I had been sitting on a terrace in Notting Hill. He had spilled his tray full of booze over Josh when he brought the drink. Josh had standing swearing in Swedish and Jen had to calm him down. How could I have forgotten that?
This is no coincidence, I thought. There is no such thing as coincidence. He had planned everything. The football. The Club. Everything... How could I be so dumb?
The song was over and the silence left me feeling lonelier and weaker than before. I clenched my fists tightly and suddenly the rope went slack. My hands fell limply next to my body. They tingled, a sure sign that blood flow had been cut off, and I shook them. There were dark red streaks where the rope had been. I rubbed over the sore spots and threw a glance at one of the cameras. Would he have seen it? Would he peek at it? Of course! I waited, counted the seconds in my head, until Gabe would come to me and tie me up again.
... Thirty-four. Thirty-five. Thirty-six...
I tapped with my fingers to keep a rhythm; ... Forty two. Forty Three...
No one came. I couldn't even hear any noise from the boxes anymore, only the tapping of rain on the corrugated roof.
‘How long are you going to stay there?’
Damn, he was still watching, I knew that though. That was exactly why I was not going to run.
‘And then what?’ I screamed.
‘You know, Naomi. I’ll tell you, because apparently you are slower to understand than the others. I'll give you time to run away, so you can hide. You Know what? I’ll even close my eyes for you. That’s only fair, eh?'
I gasped for breath. The others? What others?
‘Why are you doing this?’ I shouted.
‘Just play the fucking game, Naomi. Don't make it hard. I explained what to do and gave you
a fair chance. But what do you do? You just cry and whine. I don’t like it and I'll stop playing. Is that what you want, Naomi?’
I paused, afraid to give the wrong answer.
‘Cos if you don’t want to...’ he started but I didn't let him talk anymore.
‘Of course I don’t want to!’ I screamed in the direction of the camera.
‘Fine. Then it stops here.’
‘What do you mean?’ There was a shiver going through me.
‘You’ll end up just like the other animals. Have you ever seen pigs driven to the slaughter? Do you know how that works? I know, and I will tell you, I am not so barbarous. I gave you a fair chance.’
I shook my head in disbelieve.
‘Well, run, bitch!’
‘I’ll still end up as Sharon, right?’
For a minute he was quiet, then I thought I'd heard a laugh.
‘Don’t make it personal. It's never was.’
‘It can’t be more personal, and I’m not going to hide. You know where to find me.’
‘I said I wouldn't look.’
‘You fucking psycho, you’re crazy, you’re insane.’
‘Bitch. After all I did for you. I let you live, gave you a nice dress. All the things I did, especially for you. Is that how to thank me? Calling me insane? I have been patient with you. I was able to kill you for a long time, if I had wanted to. I could have raped you. But did I do that, Naomi? No! So your attitude doesn't make sense. Stand up before I lose my fucking patience.'
I jumped up and looked at the white dress. It was full of stains. Everything in me burned inside and outside.
‘You're a liar. I know you're lying.’ I drew the dress up demonstratively, revealing my naked body. ‘If you haven't done anything, why am I naked? And how do I get to all those bruises?’
I would lure him out of his cabin. I thought. I had to turn the tables, and play another game. But everything vibrated in me. I could sense every moment through my legs. So I kept them as stiff as possible and held my breath. Be strong, Naomi. You must not collapse.
