by Joanne Rock
“Thank you. I’ve always wanted to be a celebrity stylist, and Marcel has given me so many opportunities to make that happen once I finish my commitment to him. I’m not even halfway through my internship, and I’ve already had some interest—”
She broke off suddenly, turning from him so he couldn’t read her expression. Was she upset? She sounded uneasy.
“That’s a good thing, isn’t it?” He didn’t know enough about the fashion world. The only reason he was the head of Zayn Designs was his knowledge of business and his personal capital.
He reached over the console to touch her shoulder. Encourage her gaze. When she turned back toward him, he couldn’t identify the emotions in her eyes. But they swirled there.
Intensely.
“It would be a good thing,” she started again, her voice low. “If I could take advantage of those opportunities.”
She lifted her coffee for another sip while he tried to make sense of that.
“Why can’t you? Are you afraid they won’t still be there when you finish your year with Marcel?” He wanted to help her. To pave the way for her to use her talents. But he also didn’t want to overstep.
He had to handle this relationship carefully, but being respectful of her as a professional didn’t mean he shouldn’t acknowledge her contributions to his business. Far from it. And if she was having problems related to the fashion house, he wanted to know about them.
The muscle beneath her right eye twitched and he wondered again if she was nervous. And it occurred to him that this conversation would be easier if she was on his lap. In his arms. Under him.
Hell. He shifted uncomfortably, beginning to think he’d underestimated her effect on him. How could he concentrate on what she was saying when he wanted her this badly?
“I can’t take advantage of those opportunities, Roman.” She drew in a deep breath as she met his gaze. “Because I just found out I’m pregnant.”
The words he’d never expected to hear left a phantom echo in the silence.
They circled in his head. Blanked his brain of everything else. He had questions but didn’t trust himself to ask them in a way that would be appropriate. Hell, he didn’t have the brainpower to determine what was appropriate. Knowing that, he waited. Watching her. Hoping if she spoke again maybe he could make sense of the pronouncement.
Licking her lips, she continued. “I only just found out for certain, so I’m still trying to wrap my brain around what it means. But you’re the only man I’ve been with in the last year, so even though we took the right precautions. Well, mostly...”
Her words trailed off.
She didn’t need to finish the sentence, though, because he recalled that last time they’d been together when they hadn’t been careful enough.
“I remember,” he acknowledged, knowing he wasn’t doing enough to take responsibility. To support her. “It never occurred to me to follow up with you about that—”
With a hand on his arm, she halted his words. It was the first contact she’d initiated.
“That wasn’t on you,” she said, shaking her head as her hand fell away again, retreating toward her coffee cup. When she spoke again, her voice was quieter. “I didn’t think twice about it at the time because I had trouble getting pregnant when I was trying.”
The unexpected admission—and the hint of old hurt it revealed—felt like the most intimate thing he’d learned about her so far. Oddly, that small glimpse of vulnerability finally nudged his brain into gear.
Later, he’d think about the repercussions of this. Figure out what it meant for him and for his future. Right now, it was imperative to solidify some trust with Sable. Ensure she wouldn’t cut ties with him or Zayn Designs to return to Louisiana and her family. If she was carrying his child, he needed her here.
“I’m sorry the timing isn’t ideal for you, Sable.” He shifted toward her in his seat to look her full in the face. Then, wanting to emphasize what he said next, he took both her hands in his and squeezed. “But I’m here now, and I can help. I’ll support you in whatever comes next.”
He meant it, too. But he also knew, underneath that offer of support, there lurked a sharp ache that he had missed out on this with his wife. He scrubbed a hand over his face to give himself time to school his expression.
Annette had wanted so badly to be a mother. And while Roman planned to keep his most personal vow to her, grief knotted in his chest that he would be sharing this with another woman. He felt disloyal.
“I’m keeping this baby,” Sable told him emphatically as the SUV rolled to a stop outside the Zayn Designs building. A defensive note lurked in her voice. “That’s my next step, Roman. I’m going to make a doctor’s appointment and do everything in my power to have a healthy pregnancy. I won’t ask you to be a part of the baby’s life if you would rather not, but I will see this through.”
“Good.” Relieved, he felt some of the knot in his chest ease. He couldn’t afford for Sable to misread his tension. He squeezed her hands again to indicate to her they wanted the same thing. “I’m glad. And rest assured, I will also see this through. I’d never abandon my child. I hope you’ll allow me to attend the doctor’s appointment with you.”
Her lips parted in an O of surprise; clearly, she hadn’t been expecting that. But something softened in her expression, and the wariness faded in her hazel eyes, giving him hope that his declaration wasn’t unwelcome.
“Of course.” She tugged her hands free to retrieve the leather handbag on the seat beside her. “I’ll text you once I set it up.” She moved to get out of the vehicle, then turned to look at him over her shoulder. “Aren’t you coming upstairs?”
“Not yet.” Mostly because the baby news had thrown him for a loop. He wasn’t ready to conduct business as usual with his brother right now. He also had a lot of planning to do, beginning with securing a place to stay in New York now that he’d be spending more time here. “I’ve got a couple of other appointments this morning, but I’ll connect with Marcel later today.”
He passed her the coffee cup after she stepped onto the sidewalk.
“Oh. Well, thanks for the ride, then.” She nibbled her lip for a moment, drawing his attention to her delectable mouth. “And can we keep this news to ourselves for a little while? Just until we’ve had some time to get more comfortable with it?” She drew her jacket tighter around herself, the movement drawing his attention to her narrow waist. The curve of her hips.
And damn, but he wanted the right to touch her again. Taste her. But he couldn’t risk pressing her right now. She was too jittery.
“That’s fine,” he agreed, even though he hadn’t thought that far ahead. “We’ll talk more soon, and I hope to hear from you later about that appointment.”
She gave him a nod before turning to enter the building. Roman watched her leave, then used the call button to let the driver know their next destination. He had a lot to accomplish today, but one good thing about the baby news was that he wouldn’t have to talk Sable into spending time with him again.
With the doctor’s appointment coming up, he didn’t have to. One way or the other, he’d be seeing her soon. He just hoped by then she would be open to his next proposition. Because if she was already pregnant, he couldn’t imagine a single reason they couldn’t indulge in many more heated nights together.
Four
Sable battled her dread of doctors’ offices and showed up at the obstetrician’s early the next week. She’d texted Roman the details of the visit the same day she’d dropped the baby bombshell on him, and he’d replied that he’d be there. Outside of that communication, she’d only seen him briefly one other time at the studio and they hadn’t spoken. He’d texted her a few times, however, checking in to see how she felt. Asking if she needed anything.
That had been...nice. In fact, she appreciated the space to get her head together as much as
the reminders that he was willing to be a presence in her life. Well, the baby’s life. She had no illusions about where his loyalties lay given that they barely knew one another.
“Sable Cordero?” A nurse dressed in pink scrubs and carrying a clipboard waved her into an exam room for the ultrasound.
Still no Roman.
She blinked away the hurt she shouldn’t be feeling. So what if he’d only been paying lip service to wanting to be a part of this pregnancy? She planned to move forward with or without him, so not having him beside her today shouldn’t upset her so much.
It was just that she had hoped Roman would distract her from how nervous she was about being here, and how it reminded her of all the other times she’d wound up at her physician’s office in Baton Rouge. Or later when she’d visited the fertility clinic. The memories brought a thorny sense of failure and shame she’d scarcely admitted to herself, let alone shared with anyone. Those emotions were too personal, too negative. What was worse was that she didn’t even feel entitled to them after having met women who’d struggled with infertility far longer than she had.
When the nurse left, Sable dove for her handbag to find her phone in an effort to distract herself. She’d find a social media feed full of puppies, maybe. Or cats in costume. That was always good for a smile. She had just unlocked the screen to see two missed messages when she heard a commotion outside in the lobby.
And was that Roman’s voice?
A knock sounded at the exam room door and the nurse poked her head in.
“Ms. Cordero? There’s a gentleman here for you—” She didn’t finish speaking before Roman appeared behind her.
Sable felt a spark of awareness at the sight of him. His hair was messy, like he’d tugged on it a few times. His cheeks were flushed, his expression agitated.
“He can come in.” Sable cursed her sudden breathlessness at the sight of him, her voice sounding all wrong.
Still clutching her phone, she wrapped her arms around herself, feeling suddenly self-conscious in the thin exam gown.
“Sorry I’m late.” Roman strode in, his dark eyes sweeping over her as the nurse let the door fall closed behind them. His presence seemed to fill the room, making it feel smaller than it had just a moment ago. “There was an accident on the West Side Highway. I tried to call.”
“I’ve had my phone off,” she explained. Remembering that she was still holding it, she slipped the device back into her handbag. “I’m one of those overly compliant types that actually follow through on shutting it down at a doctor’s office.” She should have thought to check for messages instead of assuming the worst. But then, she’d grown used to doing baby-related doctor visits on her own, so maybe she’d been expecting Roman to bail on her.
The tension in Roman’s shoulders eased a fraction at her admission, and the corners of his lips lifted in a smile. “So the temptress of my fantasies is a rule follower at heart?”
“If you mean me, um...yes. Too much so,” she admitted, trying to ignore the warmth in her cheeks. She’d been so consumed with worries about making responsible decisions for a baby’s future that she hadn’t thought as much about that night with Roman. Let alone if he might want a repeat. “And the ultrasound technician should arrive soon to listen for the heartbeat. All you missed were paperwork and blood work.”
He jammed his fists in the pockets of his tailored black pants. “I missed being here with you. My goal was to support what you’re going through, not to waltz in for the fun part.”
Sable was saved from picking through all the ways that statement appealed to her by another knock at the exam room door. The ultrasound technician entered and introduced herself as Melissa. The tall, stately woman was shadowed by Pink Scrubs, who helped Sable get comfortable on the exam table before disappearing again.
The flurry of movement around her made what was happening become more real. More exciting and scary at the same time. Sable took deep breaths and hoped for the best. Her blood work had confirmed a pregnancy, so at ten weeks, they ought to hear a heartbeat. She’d confided her concerns about her miscarriage earlier, prompting the doctor’s decision to go ahead with an ultrasound even though the practice usually waited until after the eleventh week.
Strictly a precaution, the doctor had said, adding that it would give Sable peace of mind. The woman hadn’t recommended she curtail any activities, insisting she’d done a thorough review of Sable’s health history and saw no indication that her previous miscarriage would be a cause for concern. Still, some of her worry must have shown on Sable’s face because Roman laid a hand on her shoulder.
“Are you ready?” His focus remained trained on her face while the tech prepared the wand.
Unable to restrain herself, she gripped Roman’s wrist and held tight, grateful he was here. That he cared what happened. Blinking through the onslaught of emotions, she nodded up at him.
“Ready.”
* * *
Two things stood out to Roman as the tech wielded the wand on Sable’s flat belly like she was conducting an orchestra.
First, the gorgeous woman on the exam table in front of him was carrying his child, and the start to this pregnancy was healthy and perfect in every way. He heard it for himself in the strong heartbeat. He understood it in the reassuring way the tech kept pointing out all the normal markers of a ten-week pregnancy.
That part was nothing short of awe-inspiring.
But the other thing that Roman couldn’t help noticing during the ultrasound was that Sable was scared.
His first clue had been her death grip on his hand, making him all the more pissed at himself for not being there on time to get a better read on her. What had her so worried? Granted, there were a million possible answers to that question since she hadn’t been expecting to get pregnant while trying to establish herself in a competitive industry. No doubt she had a lot on her mind with all the changes ahead. But since his one and only role in this baby business prior to the birth was to make sure Sable was safe and happy, he couldn’t help feeling he was already failing.
Which was simply unacceptable.
Ten minutes later, with Sable dressed in a leopard-print trench coat she wore open over a white shirtdress and ankle boots, they took the elevator down to street level in silence while Roman strategized his best approach. He needed to spend more time with her, figure out what was bothering her, and fix it. The sooner she started trusting him, the better for the sake of shared childcare. And if they ended up working out some of this attraction that had him on edge whenever he was around her, so much the better.
But first things first. He’d already texted their driver to meet them out front.
“You look great,” Roman told her as their shoulders brushed inside the elevator cabin. He hoped to transition from the easy compliment into touchier subjects. He skimmed his fingers over her sleeve strap, feeling an answering shiver through her. “Is that one of Marcel’s designs?”
She laughed; it was the first smile he’d seen from her since he’d returned to New York. “I can’t afford your brother’s clothes. But thank you. I have fun putting outfits together. The coat was a good vintage find.”
The elevator settled on ground level with an unsteady jerk that had his arm wrapping around her. The possessiveness he’d felt that first night with her had only intensified since learning she carried their baby.
“It’s not just the clothes.” He released her as they headed toward the exit so he could hold the door for her. “You have the pregnancy glow working for you today. Have you been feeling well?”
He resented missing the first half of her appointment since he’d lost the chance to hear her talk about her health. He wanted to know how she was sleeping, if she was eating enough.
“A little more tired than usual, but I’ve heard that’s normal.” Her words mingled with the screech of a fire engine’s siren as it careened
past.
“Should you ask Marcel about modifying your schedule?” He’d agreed to keep the news between them for now, but he needed for his brother to be understanding about her condition.
“Not yet.” Eyes wary, she hesitated outside the SUV when he opened the rear door of the vehicle. “I worked so hard to land this job, Roman. As long as the doctor says I’m okay to continue, I will. And I was going to hit some consignment shops in this area while I was up this way.”
Meaning he wasn’t going to have a chance to find out why she’d been scared in the doctor’s office, let alone fix it.
“You need lunch,” he urged, thinking of her health. “I thought we could share a bite and talk more about what’s ahead.”
“I have a whole list of items I need to find for a photo shoot.” She withdrew a scrap of paper from her pocket, still making no move to enter the vehicle. “One of the stores is just around the corner.”
“Dinner then,” he suggested, but was unwilling to push her. He didn’t want to add to her worries, but the thought of not seeing her for another week was like a vise constricting his chest. “We deserve to celebrate, Sable. Hearing that heartbeat was pretty incredible.”
“Yeah, it was.” A gravity in her hazel eyes told him how much that moment had meant to her, too. She dropped her list back into her pocket.
It still blew him away that he was going to share this monumental thing with her when they’d spent so little time together. He couldn’t afford to screw it up.
“It’s not like I can celebrate with anyone else,” he reminded her. “Since we’re keeping it just between us.”
Finally, she nodded. “I should be done with the photo shoot by seven if you want to meet afterward.”
