by Belle Kayce
I turn red but point at him. “Let’s get this straight: it’s your brute self that didn’t want to let me go.”
I hear Lance chuckle from behind me, the sound delightful and wholesome. I love it so much.
***
I give Julia, Meg, and Bo all the details. After I tell them about what transpired, they all have a few comments to throw.
“My small sweet summer child growing up so fast. Getting marked already. Finally telling Lance you love him. When you laid eyes on him, you probably already loved him,” Bo says.
“You should learn how to tune in your emotions,” Julia says and Meg agrees.
I groan. “I know.”
“I’m saying that Lance can try to force himself not to feel what you are feeling but he can’t. You know it doesn’t work that way,” Julia says to me.
“I try not to! But it’s hard,” I exclaim.
Meg glances at Bo for a few moments.
“Sargon could—” she began.
“No,” I cut her off for Bo’s sake.
“Ava, you know Sargon can help you,” Meg tells me. “Right now, you are feeling . . . funky. What if those emotions get too much? After you get your mark, you feel deeply for the first couple of days. Remember what happens when your emotions go crazy? Your magic gives out. Fires can start randomly. The alpha meeting is tomorrow. You don’t want to lose control there. Sargon is your best hope. I’m going to tell Lance to talk to him.”
“Don’t,” I warn her and stop when Lance walks into the room, along with Cole.
“I got the straws you told me to get,” Lance tells Bo.
Both Bo and Meg get up.
“Do we really have to?” Bo whines. “You know the alpha meeting is going to take days, and it’s the most boring thing out there. Plus, those creeps hit on me.”
“They totally do not hit on you.” Meg scoffs.
“One time, I saw Alpha Xavier giving me the eye.”
“One time,” Meg mimics.
Bo sighs. “Not to be dramatic, but if I go, I’ll die of boredom.”
“If it’s boring, I don’t want to go either,” I joke, knowing there’s no way I can be without Lance for days.
Bo and Meg grin at each other. “How about our luna stay with us too, huh, Lance?” Meg teases him.
Lance’s eyes drag towards me.
He mind-links me. ”You don’t have to go if you don’t want.”
But I know lunas go with their mates, and I know Lance wants me to be with him even if he is not forcing me to.
“I think I have to go to this,” I say, my voice coming out harder than I intended. “It has to do with me.” I clench my fists a little. “The whole thing has to do with me.”
“You’re not going to be alone,” Lance tells me quietly.
“I’m going too then,” Julia suddenly announces, nodding at me.
I smile at my best friend. Lance hands Bo, Meg, and Cole straws.
“Let’s compare,” Bo says to Meg and Cole. Cole holds his out, noticing how much shorter it is than Bo’s and Meg’s.
“Sorry, Cole.” Meg gives him a fake smile. “I think boring things are more your thing.”
“We’ll hold the fort down in your stead. Leave it to the Bbeta,” Bo says.
“It’ll probably catch on fire, more like,” Cole says, then he turns to Lance. “I should get some rest then. It’s getting late.”
As Cole walks out of the room, Meg pulls Lance aside. Bo and Julia head to their rooms.
I mind -link Lance. “I’m going to go to the pool. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
“Alright.”
The pool has built-in lights, so it’s glowing in the dark. I take off my slippers and put my feet in the cold water, thinking about what Meg called me out for. I also think about how I feel about the whole witch and brother thing.
I honestly don’t want to think about it.
I think I’ve been staying at the pool for about thirty minutes when I notice a dark figure emerge from the trees. I become stock still when I recognize who it is.
“May I sit next to you?” Sargon is standing across the pool, looking tense.
For a second, I’m completely surprised but then I shrug. Honestly, blood or not, what he’s doing to Bo is the worst. I hear Sargon exhale loudly when I don’t say anything.
“I’ll sit then.” He sits down next to me. He’s already bare foot, and he dips his feet in the water.
We’re both silent.
Although I hate awkward, uncomfortable silences, there is no way I’m talking to him. He can go first. I’ve said what I wanted to say to him. The silence stretches longer, making me antsy. I’m about to get up when Sargon says, “You do look a lot like her.”
I know who he means. My heart constricts as I turn to face him.
He snorts. “Act like her too.”
“I would have loved to have met her,” I say softly. I think I can only voice my thoughts to my long-lost brother. He’s the one who lost her, really. His twin.
“Isn’t it ironic though?” Sargon asks me, studying me. “How you’re the one who figured out Vee’s death? Her sister? It’s no coincidence. It’s like this huge web of fate stringing everyone together.” He takes a deep breath. “I lose my sister only to find out I have another one.”
I haven’t thought about it much but he could be right. If I never overheard Trent and Steven, I wouldn’t have run away. I may have lived my lie of a life the whole time, ignorant of everything. I mean there would have been no chance of me meeting Lance unless he comes to my pack. No chance of me figuring out who my mother truly is unless my “parents” tells me.
“Everything happens for a reason.” I roll my eyes as I say this, but the corniest thing ever is the simple truth.
“Yeah, it does” He holds out his hand. “Sorry for being a jerk to you before. I hope that I can teach you how to control your emotions more, which connects to your magic.”
“I’d like that,” I muse. “What brought you to talk to me?” I narrow my eyes.
“A certain scary alpha kind of demanded that I should make amends with you.”
“I would have totally loved to have seen that,” I say, mentally noting to ask how Lance he did it. I’m sure Meg had something to do with it too. She’s right. He can help me. I do need it, no doubt. We’re going tomorrow to the meeting place, and if I can’t control my feelings, I could cause a disaster or a fire.
Sargon scoffs. “It’s not like your mate scares me to death.”
“Lance?” I ask. “He’s a teddy bear.”
“Tell me more.” Sargon smiles. His eyes flicker to my back briefly.
Continuing, I say, “He looks tough on the outside to everyone. Sure, he can look scary, but I think that’s just his face, you know? Really though, he’s like this huge teddy bear. He’s sweet, a cutie pie and he’s . . .” I notice Sargon’s face then. “Right behind me, isn’t he?”
I turn around, meeting Lance’s eyes.
Lance says seriously, “Please go on.”
CHAPTER FORTY
Julia
Why did I want to go to this alpha meeting? Because Ava needs someone.
Maybe I do too.
Traveling by shifting would have been the best way to go, but we all considered Ava’s lack of shifting. So, we decided to go by car. All of us. Me with Ava, Lance, Cole, Sargon, and Grayson.
Grayson.
He really knows how to piss me off.
It would take twenty hours to get to the meeting place by car. That’s already considering that we need to sleep in a hotel halfway.
Lance and Grayson sits in the front. Grayson is currently driving. Cole and Sargon are seated in the middle seats, and Ava and I are situated way in the back, whispering things to each other. We are mostly making fun Grayson’s manic driving.
I already thought I would die five times in total, and it’s been thirty minutes.
A sharp turn to the left makes me fling towards Ava, who laughs a
little at me.
“Can you drive like a normal person!?” I exclaim to Grayson. “It’s like you want to kill us all!”
Grayson’s dark eyes meet mine in the rearview mirror. There’s that feeling I can expertly ignore, the pull of the mate bond. Every time he looks at me, emotions start to bubble up.
“No one is going to die,” Grayson replies lazily.
“Actually, why is Grayson driving anyways?” I press on. “I can drive better.” I want to test his buttons, push him till he breaks. Then I’ll have a reason to hate him. I hate that I don’t have one yet except for the fact that he’s an alpha. He’s taken packs, extended his lands for greed.
He got collared by his own parents too.
Grayson slams on the brakes on a red light, causing all of us to have whiplash.
“Geez, Gray!” Sargon shouts.
Grayson turns around, narrowing his eyes. “You wanna drive, love?”
“Yes.” I smirk at him. “Let me show you what true driving looks like.”
“At this rate, we’re never going to get there.” Ava gives me a look, but I ignore it.
Grayson puts the car in park.
“You can’t just park in the middle of the street!”
“Just did.” Grayson shrugs and gets out of the car. Cars around us are honking. Thankfully. this isn’t the highway or else we would all be squished. Humans are strange like that.
Lance also gets out and Cole does too.
The seating arrangement has changed. Lance has now taken my spot, which is a good thing because I see the love birds cuddling and Lance giving Ava the heart eyes. I love those two. They deserve the best.
As I get into the driver’s seat, I ask, “Cole, would you please sit in the passenger seat?”
Cole’s eyes flicker to Grayson for a second. It’s tense between all of us. I know I’m putting Cole in a crappy situation, but . . .
“You’ll get over it.” Grayson places himself in the passenger seat, taking out his phone and making the decision for Cole.
Adjusting myself in the seat and putting on my seat belt, I put the car on drive, following what the GPS instructions.
After only a few minutes, everyone in the car is sleeping except Grayson. I can feel his strong presence, like waves rolling off of him. He is exuding complete confidence like a typical alpha, and I hate it. I hate it so much. I hate the power they have, hate the power they abuse towards their pack or others. I hate them so much.
I grip the steering wheel tighter.
It is so much easier to hate Grayson for what he is. An Alpha. The worst kind of wolf to be. Why would I have him as a mate? Why would we be good for each other?
“Maybe give him a chance.” Ava’s voice keeps invading my head.
She took a chance, and Lance turned out amazing, But Lance was already different from the rest. Grayson is not.
He’s the same as all of them.
I’m glad Grayson isn’t trying to make conversation with me, but I notice him sliding his gaze at me every once in a while.
“You should sleep,” I find myself telling him. It’s just so he can stop looking at me.
“Nah.” Grayson shrugs. “I don’t sleep.”
I glance at him. He’s looking straight at the road, not interested in anything. “What do you mean?”
“You’re interested in knowing?” he asks me sincerely.
The thing that annoys me about him the most is he’s always sincere with everything he says. He doesn’t lie. He can tell people how much he hates them with a huge smile on his face. He enjoys the reactions, and he always gets a rise out of everyone.
“I asked, didn’t I?” I shoot back. He doesn’t say anything. When I didn’t think he was actually going to respond, he speaks up.
“I have nightmares.”
My breath almost leaves me. Something constricts deep inside my chest. What is this intense pain I feel? Is this for him? My mate? The one I don’t want?
Then why didn’t you reject him already.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him quietly, my throat clogging up a little. I feel for him. If his parents hated him enough to put him on a silver collar, I wonder what else they did to him.
Grayson only looks away through the window.
It’s silent again and I make an exit to get gas. We have two more hours before we get to the hotel. Everyone in the car is still in deep sleep. I guess everyone is tired, but I can’t go to sleep just yet. It’s hard for me to sleep in the car.
Grayson also gets out of the car. I know what he’s about to do before he even offers.
“You’re not paying.”
“I am,” I say, holding out my credit card. Truth be told, it’s my parents, and I don’t know if it’s still open.
“You should go get food instead. I think I heard your stomach growl.”
My face heats in embarrassment, and I turn around and head towards the gas station store. I’ll get chips for all of us and two chocolate bars for Ava. For a second, I ponder what Grayson would like. As soon as I think about it, he enters the store, coming towards my direction.
“Original,” he says, pointing at the bag of chips. “ I like the original flavor.”
“Cute.”
Grayson’s eyes widen for a split second, and he cocks his head. “What about you? What do you enjoy?”
“You leaving me alone.” I take the bags of chips and walk to the register, but the man tells me that Grayson already gave him a hundred dollars to buy anything. I scream internally.
***
Thanks to my great driving skills, we make it to the hotel alive. Bo reserved us hotel rooms at the bottom floor. We’re kind of spread apart. He made sure that Grayson’s room is far away from mine.
Of course, Ava and Lance are sharing a room. Ava told me that if I needed anything, I just need to come to their room, but I don’t want to bother them. Even though they all slept in the car, they are still tired, and we need all the rest we can get because the alpha meeting is tomorrow, and it’s going to be really, really intense.
Throwing my purse to the empty chair, I look around the hotel room, appreciating the nice smell and the large bed.
I dig out a pair of pajamas from my bag and grab the hotel towel to take a steaming hot shower. I feel fine when I get out from the shower. I put my pants on, but when I put my bra on, I feel a stab of pain.
My back hurts.
I don’t bother putting on my shirt as I open the bathroom door and go to the sink. I look at myself in the large mirror. Why is this happening now?
I curse under my breath when I feel it again. Closing my eyes tightly, I will myself to move to get the medicine.
There’s a knock.
“I’m coming in,” I hear Grayson’s voice through the door. Before I can even say anything, because I cannot, he enters the room. My eyes fly open and my eyes meet with his through the mirror.
His eyes zero in on my back. The marks are clear from the silver on the whip.
I feel myself getting dizzy. I sway a little to the side, thinking I’m going to collapse on the floor, but a pair of strong arms catch me. Grayson is holding me, his hands on my naked self, and his touch makes the pain lessen. It feels so good. I look up at him to see his eyebrows furrow in pure worry. His eyes hold a dangerous glint to them. I know he wants to ask me who did it but he doesn’t. Surprisingly, he asks, “Where’s the ointment?”
“In my purse,” I reply, closing my eyes shut.
He loops one arm under my feet and carries me to the bed, gently laying me there as he rummages through my purse on the nightstand and finds the ointment.
“You’ll need to lay on your stomach,” he says. “I can—”
Before he can move me, I flip over to my stomach, exposing my back to him. Exposing my biggest insecurity to him. My biggest weakness.
Grayson doesn’t say anything as he carefully rubs the ointment on my scars. I try not to hiss out in pain because it hurts so much.
I feel ins
tantly better. I sit up, meeting Grayson’s eyes. He unabashedly checks me out in only my bra, his eyes roaming to see if I have any more scars. My entire being is on fire.
“You should go.” I clear my throat, feeling wholly exposed to the last person I want to see me like this.
Then Grayson takes his shirt off too. I open my mouth to tell him to go away but stop short when I see a huge scar across his chest and a lot of smaller ones sprinkled on his body. I remember him taking his shirt off in training, and I did not give him the time of day to look at his body. Now I couldn’t stop looking at it. Yes, he’s very well defined and has muscles, which makes my wolf happy.
“This,” he points to the very large scar jagged across his chest, “is when my dad tried to kill me in my sleep.” He laughs at this very not funny info. When he told me he couldn’t sleep and he had nightmares, I didn’t know it was this horrible. Someone trying to kill you while you were at your most vulnerable? He tells me like it’s nothing. He makes himself comfortable on the chair across from me.
Continuing on, he explains, “He told me he wanted to take my heart out to see if I had one. It was many years ago, and I sometimes forget I have it, but when I look at myself in the mirror, I always remember it.” Grayson’s penetrating gaze burns into me. “I know what fresh scars look like, and I have a feeling I know who did it.” His eyes narrow and the dangerous glint is back in his eyes. It terrifies me. “Alphas like that deserve no place in this world of ours.”
It’s like a threat to my former alpha. A promise.
For once, I agree with him. His story is worse than mine, but just because someone had a horrible childhood, it doesn’t mean they can terrorize other wolves. It isn’t fair.
“Tell me the next time it hurts. I can help with that. You shouldn’t go through that alone.” He rubs his chin like he’s a little embarrassed to tell me this. I have a strong feeling he went through it alone. He’s utterly lonely. Has been for his whole life. Like me. Except I have friends. I have Ava. He probably has no friends. He has no one who really loves him.
