by Tate James
Closing my eyes, I swallowed back the furious scream that threatened to rise in my throat. "Chase."
Poisoning the human cargo with lethal gas was an initiative Chase's uncle had come up with. No witnesses meant no one could link them to the trafficking. If any of their "shipments" were ever threatened, there was a remotely triggered gas canister stored in every container.
"That was my thought," Zed agreed. "This was out of state, so it could be a copycat. Plenty of scum have stepped into the void left by the Lockharts and your father’s Timberwolves."
I sighed. "Could be, yeah. But you know what I think of coincidences."
Zed jerked a nod. "I told Alexi to keep his ear to the ground and report back if he hears anything more."
"Good," I muttered, biting the edge of my thumbnail. "We need to start getting proactive with Chase. My plan with Cass is long term, but we need to start cutting Chase off at the knees now. Otherwise, none of us will be alive to play the long game."
His eyes narrowed. "Why haven't you filled me in on this plan?"
I bit my nail harder, accidentally nipping skin and tasting blood. No response was needed, though.
Zed just gave a short, bitter laugh and shook his head. "You don't trust me."
I cringed. "I do trust you," I whispered. "But—"
"I get it," he cut me off, giving a bitter smile. "Believe me, Dare. Of anyone, I get it. I know how it feels to have him inside your brain, making you second-guess everyone. But you can't let him do that to you. Don't let him get between us again."
Zed reached out and grasped my wrist, pulling my thumbnail away from my teeth. He didn't let go, though. Instead, he used my wrist to pull me closer as he stepped into my breathing space.
"Between us?" I repeated, feeling like my brain had just turned to mush.
The corners of his lips tugged up in a half smile, and his free hand cupped the back of my neck. "Yes. Us. When are you going to quit playing dumb and admit there's a hell of a lot more to us than mere friendship? There always has been."
Words totally failed me as I stared back into his eyes and found his gaze overflowing with desire and pain. Fuck. What was I doing to us? My stubborn refusal to see what was right under my nose was going to destroy our bond much faster than any failed romance.
"Zed..." I breathed his name like a plea, but I had no idea what it was that I really wanted. For him to drop this whole thing and go back to the way things used to be? Back when I refused to admit I'd never fully gotten over my crush on him and couldn't seem to look away when he was making out with random women in our clubs? Yeah, fat load of use that would do me. Despite my stubborn level of denial, I couldn't even lie to myself that I would take that situation well. Not now. And no one needed me going off and killing innocent girls for hooking up with him.
I never claimed to be rational when it came to Zayden De Rosa. But previously, I'd kept those feelings on lockdown, never to see the light of day.
"Dare," he replied, his own voice a husky whisper as his eyes searched my face. "You can't act like you don't feel the same way for me. I know you too well."
I sucked in a short breath, preparing to deny his accusation. But... no words came. The next thing I knew, I was leaning in, closing the gap between us, and kissing him softly. Zed stiffened like that had been the last thing he'd expected, but before I could pull away in embarrassment, he kissed me back.
His hand tightened on the back of my neck, pulling me closer as he released my wrist and grabbed my waist. Our mouths moved together like we were sharing one brain, one soul, and knew precisely what the other wanted... needed.
Then the door slammed open like someone had deliberately shoved it, and I all but leapt away from Zed like he was electrified.
"Oh, whoops," Lucas said in the most sarcastic voice I'd heard in my life. "Was I interrupting something? My bad. Nothing worse than being cockblocked, huh, Zeddy Bear?"
A laugh bubbled up in my throat before I could clap a hand over my mouth, and Zed speared me with a pained glare.
"Sorry," I muttered. "It's pretty funny."
Zed swung his glare back to Lucas. "Call me that again and I'll shove my foot so far up your ass you'll be licking my toes. Now fuck off; we were in the middle of something."
Lucas's grin was pure evil. "Aw, snookums, no need for that level of animosity. Hayden, Cass is asking for you. He says his shoulder is aching and he can't find the pain pills."
Zed threw his hands up in exasperation, stalking away a couple of paces. "It was barely a fucking scratch; he's being a baby."
I shook my head at their antics and decided it was probably for the best. Zed and I had been rocking the friendzone for twelve years. What was a little longer?
Biting back a smile, I met Zed's heated gaze and instantly shivered. "Raincheck," I muttered before I could filter that promise. His brows hitched and a small smile tugged at his lips as he nodded.
"I'll hold you to that," he replied, and I quickly made my exit before I came up with an insane plan like inviting Lucas to stay and join us while we destroyed the friendzone once and for all.
As I headed back in the direction of the living room, I caught Lucas's voice again.
"Payback's a bitch, huh?" Then he groaned. "Ow, not cool, Zeddy Bear. Don't solve problems with violence."
I rolled my eyes, guessing what had just happened but not stopping to go back and break it up. They were both big boys; they could sort their own shit out. Besides, for the most part and despite their differences, I was getting the impression they actually liked one another.
Cass was on the living room sofa, looking kicked back and relaxed with a movie on the big-screen TV. When I walked toward him, his eyes followed me in that darkly sexual way that never failed to raise my pulse rate.
"You okay?" I asked, propping my hands on my hips. "Lucas said you needed painkillers."
Cass arched one brow. "Huh?"
I smiled and shook my head. "That's what I thought." Lucas hadn't even spoken to Cass; he was just getting Zed back for interrupting us in the kitchen. Fucking men and their jealousy... equal parts amusing and infuriating. Then again, I supposed that was something I needed to get used to, given that I had zero intention of choosing between my current lovers.
Ugh. I hated that word. Lovers. Made me feel like a damsel with a French-speaking, long-haired pirate sweeping me off my feet. But it fit a hell of a lot better than fuck buddies, so that's where we were at.
Cass reached out his hand to me, coaxing me closer, then pulled me into his lap when I tried to sit beside him. "Hey," he murmured, wrapping his arm around my waist as I cuddled into him without bumping his shoulder. "We've got this, Red."
I released a long breath, consciously forcing myself to let go of some tension that I seemed to carry with me day and night. "I know," I replied. "But it's still scaring the crap out of me. When I realized we were actually going through with that plan... when I had to shoot you..." A lump formed in my throat, and I swallowed hard.
Cass pressed a kiss to my forehead. "I had total faith in you. You knew what you were doing, and it worked."
I grimaced. "As far as we know. Chase was at Club 22 after your funeral, just being a fucking nuisance."
Cass grunted. "Good. Shows he thinks he won that round; he couldn't resist rubbing it in a bit."
He was right, but I was still anxious as hell. What if he wasn't fooled. I'd gambled—and won—on the idea he would be so smug about his "victory" that he wouldn't stay and check Cass for signs of life. He hadn't, but those few minutes waiting for him to leave so I could call for discreet medical assistance were etched onto my memory in harsh, vivid detail.
"Don't ever ask me to shoot you again, Saint," I told him in a quiet voice, not even trying to hide the pain I was still feeling over that moment.
He didn't offer me empty promises, just nudged my face to his and kissed me long and slow. His kiss washed away the anxiety and fear and filled me with the warm glow of confidence once mo
re. Filled me with love. And that made me feel damn near invincible. I wasn't fighting this war with Chase alone. I never had been, with Zed at my back. But this time I also had Cass and Lucas, and goddamn if we weren't a force to be fucking reckoned with.
"I'll have to leave in a couple of days," Cass murmured when our kisses slowed. "All the details are almost worked out."
Sadness stabbed through me. "I changed my mind; I don't want you to go."
The corners of his lips curled up, and he combed his fingers through my hair. "Cute."
I frowned. "I'm not saying that to be cute. I'm serious. We can think of something else that doesn't involve you leaving me."
His fingers tangled in the back of my hair, and he slammed his lips against mine, this time kissing me hard and aggressively, stealing the protests from my lips along with the breath from my lungs.
"I will never leave you, Red," he told me in a harsh whisper when he was done kissing me stupid. "Nothing on this entire fucking planet can make me leave you."
I swallowed heavily but nodded. I knew what he was saying because I felt exactly the same way. But still, I couldn't shake the steadily building sense of dread every time I thought about what was to come, about what we all needed to do to deal with Chase once and for all.
7
I fell asleep wrapped up in Cass's embrace after he spent half the night making goddamn sure I wouldn't forget his touch while he was gone, but when I woke up, it was to Lucas softly kissing my cheek.
"Hey you," I mumbled, rubbing at my eyes.
"You slept in," he told me with a smile. "I left you as long as I could, but visiting hours—"
"Oh fuck," I cursed, sitting up with a gasp and swiping a hand through my hair. "It's that late? How? Shit, I'm sorry. Give me five minutes; I'll—"
"Hayden, it's fine," he cut me off as he grasped my face between his hands. "Take a breath. It's not a big deal, but I spoke with my mom's nurse and he said she was really clear-headed today. Maybe it'll be a good chance to speak with her properly."
I blinked away the last of my sleep fog and pressed a quick kiss against his lips. "I'll be quick. Where's Cass?"
Lucas wrinkled his nose. "You don't want to know." He didn't look worried, so I just gave him a suspicious look until he kissed me, then released my face. "I'll wait downstairs?"
Giving him a vague nod, I watched him leave the bedroom, then hurried to grab some fresh clothes and shower away the evidence of my night with Cass. I was ready in a little over five minutes, dressing casually since we were heading to Sunshine Estate and my intention wasn't to intimidate the answers out of Sandra.
After I raced downstairs, the sound of voices coming from the gym pulled my attention, and I changed direction to investigate. When I pushed the door open, I had to do a doubletake with what I found in front of me.
"Are you two fucking serious?" I demanded, blinking twice in case my mind was playing tricks on me. But nope, the image didn't change. Zed and Cass were actually sparring. Cass's left arm was still strapped in the black sling, but his other hand was covered with a boxing wrap and his upper body was bare and gleaming with sweat.
Zed was also shirtless, both of his hands in wraps as he danced around Cass and taunted him with quick jabs to the body.
They didn't fucking stop when they saw me, either. Not that I blamed them; I'd bet they were both cautious of the other taking a dirty shot while they were distracted. It's what I'd have done.
"Cassiel Idiot Saint!" I barked, striding across the gym to stop them by any means necessary, even if that meant decking both of them. "You've got to be fucking with me. In what world did you think this was a good idea? Either of you?" My accusing glare swung between Zed and Cass, but neither one of them had the grace to look ashamed.
"Don't give me that look," Zed responded, then flicked out a lightning-fast jab at Cass's face, which Cass dodged and answered with a sharp right hook that caught Zed across the cheekbone. "Ouch." He winced and shook his head with a rueful grin. "Besides, Grumpy Cat started it."
"Fuck off, Zeddy Bear," Cass sneered back. "You started this because your balls are so blue they're basically fossilized."
"That doesn't even make sense," Lucas drawled from the doorway. He gave me a shrug when I turned to look at him. "They've been at this for ages. Better just leave them to get it out of their systems."
I hesitated, but Cass just gave me a one shoulder shrug before swinging his leg up in a hard kick that caught Zed in the side. I winced but then shook my head and followed Lucas's advice. Fuck it, they didn't need me refereeing whatever the hell they were dealing with. So I just threw my hands up in exasperation and exited the gym with Lucas by my side.
"If it's any comfort, Cass is winning," he murmured with an edge of laughter as we headed through to the garage. "Even with one arm in a sling, he's a fucking weapon."
The admiration in his tone was unmistakable, and I gave him a curious side-eye. "Did you research Cass before or after you knew who he was to me?"
Lucas shot me a smirk. "I can't give away all my secrets, Hayden. He hardly needs the ego boost of knowing I used to watch his old fights online."
Something about that was way too adorable, so I grinned and headed over toward Zed's Shelby Mustang, as the Audi was nowhere to be seen. No doubt he'd already taken it in to get the paint touched up.
"Hey, um." Lucas paused before we got to the car, his hands toying with the brim of the ballcap he held. "Any chance I could drive?"
My brows shot up, and I considered his question as I grabbed the keys off the hook near the car. "Sure," I said, tossing the key to him and giving him a stern look, "but don't fucking tell Zed, okay? He's a total diva about his cars."
The smile that split Lucas's face was worth Zed's wrath, and I couldn't stop myself smiling back as he put his cap on backward and popped the driver’s door open. It had been a good decision. Lucas looked like he was straight out of a sex dream behind the wheel of the Shelby in his hoodie, backward cap and sexy fucking grin.
"Stop staring at me," he teased as we started driving. "You're making me want to blow off this visit to my mom and dirty up the backseat of Zed's car."
Dammit if my pussy didn't tighten just at the idea of that. "Maybe on the way home," I replied with a sly smirk. "But we really should talk to her if she's having a good day. At least see if she can tell you whether you do have any older siblings."
Lucas grimaced. Zed and I had told him about the redacted file we'd found, and we'd theorized on what it all could mean. But ultimately, there was no conclusive evidence that Sandra had ever had another baby before Lucas, only that she'd had some form of IVF treatment as a teenage girl. Which, in itself, seemed suspect as hell, but it didn’t mean that it’d ever resulted in a pregnancy.
Then again, maybe it had. Maybe multiple pregnancies. Only Sandra could tell us, though, as our attempts to dig further into her medical records had gone nowhere. One thing was for sure, though, and that was the Guild was heavily involved in the Wildeboer family.
"Is it bad that I sort of don't want to know?" he asked after a few moments of silence.
I reached out and threaded my fingers through his where it rested on his knee. "Not even a little bit. But I do think you need to know. Something sketchy is going on with the Guild, and more than anything, I need to know how to keep you safe. So... I need to know what the whole story is so I can see where the threats might be hiding."
His hand squeezed mine, but he didn't look reassured. "This is the last thing you should be stressing about, Hayden. You've got enough going on with Chase."
I shook my head. "And that situation will become so much easier to deal with when we can cross the fucking mercenary guild off our list of concerns. Besides"—I drew a breath and licked my lips—"I love you, so, you know... I'd do anything to keep you safe."
Lucas didn't respond immediately, and even as fast as my heart raced, I wondered if maybe he hadn't heard me. But then he pulled over onto the side of the road an
d turned to stare at me.
"What did you just say?" he demanded, his lips twitching with a smile.
I wrinkled my nose. "You fucking know what I said; don't pretend you don't." My cheeks were hot and my palms sweaty, even though our hands were still joined. Shit. Why was I suddenly turning into such a... human?
Lucas gave a soft laugh and leaned over to kiss me softly, his lips moving against mine and his tongue exploring my mouth in a relaxed, confident way that was totally at odds with the panic I was experiencing at telling him I loved him for the first time.
"I've loved you from the moment you kissed me that night at 7th Circle," he whispered against my lips as his hand cupped my face like I was his most treasured possession. "So I'm glad you're finally on board."
His teasing made it easy to quit panicking. He knew exactly how to handle my shit, and I loved that about him. Or about us. So my heart was ten tons lighter as I pushed him away gently and rolled my eyes.
"Okay then, Captain Emotionally Stable. Can you keep driving please? We're going to miss visiting hours, and then I'll have to threaten the poor nurses to let us in against the rules."
He just grinned and leaned in to kiss me again, then pulled back out onto the road to continue toward the medical center his mother was being treated at. We drove in silence for a few minutes, then he raised our linked hands and kissed my knuckles.
That gesture, more than any words, struck me right in the heart. Lucas never hid his feelings, but I'd just never truly recognized them. But now I had, and it was a feeling I wanted to hold onto forever.
8
More often than not when I brought Lucas to visit his mom, I would wait outside, simply for the fact that my presence and my resemblance to my dead mother, who'd been Sandra's friend, caused her undue stress. But today Lucas kept my hand in his as we made our way through the facility to his mom's room.
"Luca," Sandra greeted her son as we entered her room, "how lovely to see you. Oh, you brought your friend." Her smile slipped clean off her pretty face when she saw me enter behind Lucas.
