by Lenora Worth
Will love be enough to heal their past?
Her secret kept them apart...
Will courage give them another chance?
Days before her wedding, a wrenching ordeal shattered Josie Fisher’s dreams…and she fled to her Amish hometown to start over. Now Tobias Mast has arrived with two goals: to find Josie and learn why she called off their wedding, and to buy a home. When the only house he can afford is next door to Josie’s farm, will she finally risk telling him her dark secret?
USA TODAY Bestselling Author
“I’m not that girl anymore, Tobias.”
“Josie,” he said, his eyes serious now, “whatever happened, whatever you’re afraid of, I will handle it—for both of us.”
Tears burned but Josie held tightly to her control. “It is my burden only, Tobias.”
Before she knew what was happening, he sat down beside her. He took her hand in his, careful that no one would notice. “I made you something.”
He slipped a warm piece of wood between their laced fingers. “I will carry your burdens, Josie.”
Josie couldn’t speak, couldn’t move. The world around her seemed to recede as Tobias held her hand in his, the carving warm between them, the world away from them. The touch of his skin ricocheted through her system like a ray of warm sunshine, bringing a peace she hadn’t felt in years. She lifted her hand and saw the delicate butterfly he’d shaped out of what looked like an exotic wood.
“Tobias,” she whispered, ready to pour out her heart.
Tobias stood, his expression full of love and understanding. And hope...
With over seventy books published and millions in print, LENORA WORTH writes award-winning romance and romantic suspense. Three of her books were finalists in the ACFW Carol Awards, and her Love Inspired Suspense novel Body of Evidence became a New York Times bestseller. Her novella in Mistletoe Kisses made her a USA TODAY bestselling author. Lenora goes on adventures with her retired husband, Don, and enjoys reading, baking and shopping...especially shoe shopping.
SEEKING REFUGE
Lenora Worth
www.millsandboon.com.au
Seek the Lord, and his strength: seek his face evermore.
—Psalm 105:4
Dedicated to all the silent women out there holding pain inside their hearts.
Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Dear Reader
Excerpt from The Amish Newcomer by Patrice Lewis
Chapter One
The house across the footbridge looked less sinister and sad in the spring.
Josie Fisher sat on the bench near the grossmammi haus and wished she could forget the other home that stood stark white, empty and waiting, off in the distance. She’d grown up in that house, and each time she went near it, the memories tore through her like a thunderstorm.
But today, with the spring wind in the air and flowers blooming all around, Josie felt hope in her heart. The early daffodils and dandelions her sister-in-law, Raesha, had planted around the yard lifted their determined heads to the sun. The old oaks and red maples were lush with new leaves. The herb garden behind the main house was coming along nicely. She could almost smell the fresh mint and basil, the dill and oregano. Josie watched as a robin pecked at the grass near the hat shop. She and Naomi had planted sunflowers there. It would take a while for those to grow and bloom.
Turning her head to the sun, Josie remembered Naomi Bawell’s sage advice.
“Look at the sunflowers, Josie. See how they lift their faces toward the sky. They seek Gott’s love, same as we do.”
Josie loved Naomi Bawell and clung to her as if she was indeed Josie’s true grandmother. Naomi and Josie lived in the small grossmammi haus located behind the main house on the Bawell farm. Lived together and watched out for each other, as a grossmammi and kinder should. Josie felt safe there inside the solid walls with the tiny kitchen and living room, two bedrooms and a washroom in the back. A breezeway separated their apartment from the rambling main house where her brother, Josiah, lived with his wife, Raesha, and their six-month-old son, Daniel.
And with little Dinah.
Josie’s daughter by birth, but their daughter now to raise Amish. After they were married, they’d officially adopted Dinah.
Over two years ago, Josie had left three-month-old Dinah on the Bawell porch. Hard to believe that tiny baby girl was now walking and jabbering, her mischievous smile as bright as the sunshine.
You ran away and left your child. The voice that echoed inside her head made Josie look down at her dark blue tennis shoes.
But she is safe now and healthy and happy, and so are you. That voice made her look up again. Toward the sky.
“I did the right thing.”
Yes, she’d done the right thing after being attacked by an Englisch boy. She’d felt it necessary to leave her baby with someone who could love her and take care of her. The Bawells had always been kind to Josie when she was little and afraid.
Now she was an adult but still so horribly afraid. She rarely left the property except to attend church and occasionally go to the general store. She’d been ruined by a man who’d later done the same thing to an Englisch girl, and because that girl also had a powerful family, Drew Benington had stood trial and had been sent to jail. After that, another girl had come forward to testify. Josie’s friend Sarah had written to her about his arrest and the trial since they’d all known him. Sarah had no idea what had happened to Josie, but Josie’s relief after reading her friend’s letter had been short-lived. What if Drew tried to get in touch with her? How would she handle that?
Would she ever be able to truly rest and give up her guilt?
Drew didn’t believe he was the father of a little girl and had denied signing any papers to acknowledge that. He had given up any legal paternal rights.
Josie prayed she’d never see him again, and she thanked Gott that Dinah was safe and happy.
But on sweet warm afternoons such as this one, Josie longed for the arms of another man. The boy she’d left behind in her shame and misguided confusion.
Tobias.
“I will walk you home.”
He’d told her that the first day they’d met by a rocky stream that flowed down the mountain. By the time their walk home was over, Josie had a huge crush on Tobias Mast. After that, they had managed to find each other at singings and frolics. He had smiled at her the first time she went to a youth gathering after church.
Sitting across the table from each other after they’d sung lively hymns had soon become her favorite part of attending church. She knew she’d see Tobias there.
“I will drive you home.”
Drive her home in his buggy? That was a big step but one she cherished. It meant he wanted to court her.
“I will allow that,” she told him with a smile, her heart already lost to his beautiful deep blue eyes. His curling light brown hair always needed to be combed, b
ut he smelled fresh and clean, like that mountain stream.
“I cleared it with one of the ministers and with your friend’s family,” he said. “Then next we will arrange for you to meet my daed and my bruder.”
Josiah had allowed her to come to Kentucky, hoping she’d find a suitable husband. Maybe she had. But she’d been mad at Josiah for so long she didn’t want to prove him right.
Yet she couldn’t resist Tobias. “We will?”
“Ja. And since you have a bruder back in Ohio, I will ask his permission to court you.”
“No,” she’d said, causing Tobias to frown. “I mean—my brother is not concerned about me. I make my own decisions.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“I am when it comes to you,” she’d replied, being the flirty girl she thought the world needed. While flirting worked with Tobias, he always respected her. She loved him for being considerate and cautious. She had loved him completely.
Now her heart ached with missing him, with remembering his sweet laughs and his kind nature. They had planned a future together in Kentucky. But that future had been shattered the night her whole world had shifted and changed forever.
With the scent of honeysuckle surrounding her and the warm wind moving over the fields and valleys of Campton Creek, Pennsylvania, Josie closed her eyes and wondered where Tobias was at this exact moment.
* * *
Tobias Mast paid the taxi driver and turned to stare up at the place where he’d reserved a room for the week. The Campton Center had been recommended to him as a place to stay while he conducted some business here. He’d heard the center, which used to be a private estate, now served as a source of help for the Amish who lived in Campton Creek.
When he’d researched Campton Creek, he’d found the center online at the library back in Orchard Mountain, Kentucky. Tobias had immediately called the Campton Center and explained that he was Amish and he was looking to settle in Campton Creek. A nice lady named Jewel had talked to him.
“If you need a doctor, lawyer, room and board, a safe haven, advice and help on anything, we will find someone for you. That’s what we’re here for.”
“I just need a place to stay for a while,” he’d explained. “I plan to buy a home with land in Campton Creek.”
“We have several places for sale,” the woman had told him. “I’ll print out the listings for you and have them ready when you arrive. There are some beautiful properties here.”
Now that Tobias had arrived from Kentucky, he wondered at his sanity. He’d come to Campton Creek not only to buy a house and land, but to find the woman who’d broken his heart.
Josie.
Closing his eyes, he remembered Josie’s beautiful brown eyes and her golden-brown hair. She’d broken his heart and he needed to find out why. Why had she left him two months before they were to be married?
He could never forget the first moment they’d met.
“Who are you?”
Tobias had turned from where he’d been fishing in a mountain spring that ran through the community. He saw her and smiled. Her dark hair shimmered a deep reddish gold in the spring sunshine. She wore a light blue dress and a white apron, her black cloak open since the spring day had warmed. Her black kapp sat squarely over her oval face, its strings dangling against her neck. Freckles danced across her nose.
He went back to his fishing. “Who is asking?”
“I’m Josephine Fisher. I came here from Ohio with my friend. I might stay here.”
He thought he heard a challenge in that declaration.
“Ja? Well, I’m Tobias Mast and I live here in Orchard Mountain. Why haven’t I seen you around?”
She twisted the loose black ribbon of her head cover. “I have only been here for two days. I decided to come on a walk by myself. The woods are so pretty.” She lifted her hand. “I love the wildflowers.”
Tobias threw out his line and glanced over at her. Mighty spunky to take off into the woods alone. “Don’t they have woods and wildflowers in Ohio?”
Her dark eyebrows lifted. “Of course. But I don’t like Ohio.”
Tobias gave up on the fish since talking to her seemed so much better. After they had sat on some rocks and chatted a while, he said, “I will walk you back home.”
“I didn’t ask you to do that.”
“I want to. I am headed that way.”
“Do you know the way to where I’m staying?”
“Not yet. But I will. Wilkum, Josephine Fisher.”
She’d given him a big smile that had enveloped his heart. “You can call me Josie. Everyone does.”
Josie. He’d fallen for her that day and he still loved her.
Now he’d tracked Josie back to the place where she’d grown up. They had been in love, so why had she left?
He needed answers. He’d stick around until he had them.
After his father’s death, Tobias had inherited the family land and home back in Kentucky, but with both his parents dead and his only sibling living in Indiana, he’d decided it was time for him to move on. He sold out and packed a bag the day he deposited the check. After wiring his brother half of the asking price, Tobias had set out for Pennsylvania. Because he was alone and hurting, Tobias only wanted to find Josie and get to the truth, something he’d put off to stay with his ailing father. He couldn’t move on with his life until he at least had the opportunity to confront her.
After that, he’d decide how to handle his future. If Josie was here, Tobias aimed to buy a place and settle in Campton Creek with the hope that she’d settle with him.
If she didn’t want him, he’d still be near her, and that had to count for something.
Tobias walked toward the big brick home with the impressive columns on each side of the front door. All around, various trees heavy with spring sprouts hung like green veils. Garden trails wound their way around the grounds, annuals and perennials shouting in hues of red, blue and orange. The side yard held a parking lot complete with buggy hitches and horse railings.
That made him smile. Seemed this place did accommodate the Amish. He wondered about this obviously historic house and the Camptons. This town had obviously been named after the family. Tobias loved history and often checked out historical fiction or biographies from the library. Most of his friends frowned on such notions, but he liked to know about things.
His daed used to tell him that his curiosity would get him in trouble one day. Maybe so. Right now, he was curious about a clean room and a good meal.
Tobias rang the doorbell and waited.
An older woman with a bright smile on her face opened the door.
“Jewel?” Tobias asked, taking in her white hair and serviceable skirt and blouse.
“No, I’m Bettye,” the woman said with a wave of her hand. “Jewel is our new manager, but she had to run some errands. You must be Tobias Mast.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, mindful to speak in Englisch.
“C’mon in, then,” Bettye said. “I’ll get you signed in and show you to your room.”
Tobias took in the opulence of the estate house. “I appreciate that. I’m mighty tired.”
Bettye checked the register on a small electronic pad, her fingers moving with haste over the keyboard. “Now, Tobias, we serve breakfast to our visitors at seven each morning. And if you ask ahead, we’ll leave you some dinner on the stove.”
“You must stay busy,” he said, liking Bettye’s calm demeanor. “From what Jewel told me, this place is truly a community center.”
“Oh, I don’t normally do much these days,” she replied. “I’m a companion to the owner, Judy Campton. I was her assistant for years after my husband passed. When Admiral Campton died, she and I moved into the apartment over the carriage house. We usually have lots of people moving through here, but it’s the end of the day. Jewel
will be back soon. She lives here now and keeps watch over Mrs. Campton and me.” Chuckling, she whispered, “They all think we’re old, you know.”
Grinning, Tobias followed her to the stairs while she continued. “The kitchen is located in the back of the house. You’ll find snacks and drinks on the sideboard in the dining room. We have one of those newfangled coffee makers that use pods.”
Tobias had seen those in his travels and marveled at how the machines made a cup of coffee from a tiny round plastic pod.
“My daed frowned on such notions,” he admitted. “I think they’re amazing, but I’m not supposed to admit that.”
“I won’t tell,” Bettye said. They reached a door on the second floor. “This is your room. It has a small bath and a desk and chair. There is a table where you can eat if you’d like or you’re welcome to eat in the kitchen or out on the sunporch.”
Bettye turned to smile at him. “We operate from six to six around here, but if you need anything, there is a button on the phone that will ring through to Jewel. She’s a light sleeper, and I must warn you—the woman used to be a bouncer at a nightclub.”
“Denke,” Tobias said, thinking Bettye was one of the kindest women he’d ever met even when she was warning him to mind his manners. “I think I will fall straight to sleep once I get settled.”
“Oh, one more thing,” Bettye said as she gave him a key card to his room. “Jewel left you copies of the real-estate listings she mentioned on the phone.”
“I’ll look those over,” Tobias said. “I appreciate her doing that.”
Bettye gave him a motherly stare. “Do you plan to buy land here?”
He nodded. “Yes, I do.”
He didn’t tell Bettye that he also planned to find Josephine Fisher. That was something he had to do in his own way and on his own time.
Once Tobias was in his room and had freshened up, he ate one of the cinnamon cookies along with a bottle of apple juice he’d found on the small wooden table.
Then he sat down in the comfortable chair by the window that looked out over a small side garden full of roses and some pretty shrubs, so he could read the listings he’d found on the desk.
