The Fairy Trail

by Catherine Ras

  “Get to bed. You have school tomorrow.”

  Maggie retreated as fast as she could. She didn’t even take a moment to remind her mother it was Friday night and there was no school on Saturday. Running up the stairs, she told herself her mother would figure it out tomorrow.

  For the first time in Maggie’s life, she’d wished there was school on Saturdays.

  The next morning, Maggie tiptoed downstairs so as not to wake her mother. She wore her best pair of jeans--crushed, wrinkled and ripped to look as if they really were the most updated fashion. She chose a lightweight, spring-green sweater with a v- neck. She debated wearing something with a v- neck after her mother’s comments the night before, but she decided she could sneak upstairs when she got home before her mother saw it.

  While opening the refrigerator, she wondered what had happened to put her mother in the dark mood she was in. She took out the milk, shut the door, and the answer popped into her head.

  The boyfriend was gone. In fact, Maggie hadn’t seen any sign of him in the last few days. There had only been only one mug in the sink when she got home from school, and even though she tried not to snoop on her mother, she noticed her mother’s door was open the last few mornings. It had always been closed when the boyfriend was in her bed.

  Now she wondered what her mother did to chase him away.

  She poured milk over her cereal.

  It didn’t matter what her mother did. What mattered was the end product of her boyfriend leaving—her mother’s anger and inability to deal with it—would be taken out on her.

  Maggie dumped her bowl of cereal into the garbage. She would stop at the mini mart on her way to Bella’s house and get a donut. She didn’t want to be in the house when her mother woke up.

  Since Nissa’s gift, Maggie had become more popular than Bella who was the most sought after girlfriend in her school, something she never thought would happen. She loved the attention not only from the girls but the boys. Boyfriends were new to her, and right now, there were three that were pursuing her. She smiled just thinking about it.

  Maybe today would be the day she would decide. Bella was having a party—her parents were out of town. The thought of having an actual boyfriend brought a tingling sensation to her insides, and she hoped at the party she would be able to make the decision.

  She was the first to arrive at Bella’s house because she had promised to help set up for the party. Bella had bought all the beer, liquor and snacks. Maggie never asked where she got them, how she got them, or even where she got the money to afford them. She didn’t want to know. She couldn’t be associated with it if they were caught. After all, many of the invited kids were under eighteen, including her.

  “Hey, girl.” Bella gave her the ‘fake hug,’ as Maggie called it. She put her arms loosely around Maggie and their cheeks touched, but their pursed lips never did. Maggie thought it was an odd way to greet each other, but Bella pointed out all the movie stars did it that way.

  By two o’clock in the afternoon, the house, pool, and adjoining deck had students flowing about like mice running through a maze. Music was playing, plenty of drink was being consumed, and Maggie made her decision. She wanted Mike. He was tall and good looking. He had dark, wavy hair and the most brilliant white smile she had ever seen. When he flashed it in her direction, her knees grew weak.

  By dusk, they were cuddled on an outdoor sofa kissing—and it wasn’t cheek kissing. By dark, they moved in doors to a small bedroom in the back of the house where Mike introduced her to sex.

  Maggie believed she was in love, and because Mike told her if she loved him, she would make love to him, she didn’t argue when he began to undress her. It made sense. So for the rest of the evening, Mike and Maggie twisted around each other, Maggie believing her love for him was the reason to have unprotected sex at the age of sixteen.

  She didn’t think about the possibility of getting pregnant. It wouldn’t happen to her because she had the fairies on her side. She had to believe that Nissa making her popular would prevent anything from going wrong in this part of her life (even if her home life was falling apart once again). But maybe the real reason Maggie let Mike penetrate her was because she needed to feel loved.

  She wanted all the popularity, the ‘fake hugs’ and having sex with Mike. It was filling the void her home life left within her.

  When they were finished, Mike put his clothes on. He kissed her on the cheek and said, “See ya, Maggie.” He winked at her as he left her on the bed still naked.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Bella walked in on Maggie when she was putting her clothes back on and gave her a sly smile, either not noticing the tears running down her cheeks or not caring. She asked Maggie to stay and help her clean up, reminding Maggie that she was her best friend, and she had promised.

  Maggie watched Bella leave the room. She wiped her eyes and finished dressing. When she finally walked out, she realized the house was quiet. How long had it been quiet? The only person around was Bella who had a trash bag in her hand.

  She looked up at Maggie. “It’s about time. I thought you were going to help me.”

  Maggie took the bag from Bella and proceeded to collect the rest of the garbage. Bella went into the house. She stopped for a moment and took in the scope of the remnants of the party, then pulled her phone out and checked the time.

  Her mother was going to kill her. It was eleven thirty. By the time they were done cleaning, she wouldn’t get home until after midnight, which ended up being later than that because Bella wouldn’t let her leave until the house was totally clean. Every time Maggie professed fatigue or her mother’s imminent anger at her for coming home so late, Bella guilted her into staying.

  The day she had looked so forward to, believing it was going to be the best one she ever had, turned out to be one of her worst. By the time she left Bella’s house, she couldn’t think straight. Physical and emotional fatigue weighed her down so her legs felt like cement, making each step exhausting. It was two A.M. when she slipped into the kitchen and made her way up to her bed.

  Her mother’s door was shut. If only, she thought to herself.

  The next day her mother was waiting for her at the kitchen table. When Maggie walked into the room, her mother picked up her phone, tapped a button and turned it so Maggie could see it. It read 12:16 P.M. in large, angry red numbers and letters.

  Maggie passed her mother and prepared a bowl of cereal. Knowing what was to come, she took a seat opposite her mother who put the phone on the table and took a sip from her coffee mug.

  “Having fun, are you?”

  “It was okay. I helped Bella with her party.”

  “Were her parent’s home?” She glared at Maggie.

  Maggie picked up her bowl of cereal. “What do you care,” she said as she walked out of the kitchen.

  “Margaret Smith,” growled her mother. “Get back here.”

  Only one other time had Maggie heard her full name escape her mother’s lips. Her legs started to shake in response to the fear in her brain. She made her way back to the table and slinked into her chair.

  “I am still your mother, and you live under my roof. Until you move out, you live by my rules. Curfew is eleven thirty. And you’re grounded for a month.”

  “A month!” Maggie exclaimed. “I was late one night. One night.”

  Her mother leaned forward. “One night too many. So, who did you whore with?” The sarcastic, demeaning look on her mother’s face mixed in with anger had the appearance of…jealousy. That scared Maggie even more because she had no idea how to handle this emotion from her mother.

  “No one,” she lied. “I was late because it took us three hours to clean up. It was just Bella and me. No one else stayed to help.”

  “Typical kids,” her mother spat. “Ungrateful and lazy. So how did she get you to do it?

  “I promised I would help her.”

  Her mother lit a cigarette. “So, even with all those clothes I’v
e so graciously supplied you, there’s still no boy who wants you?” She smiled.

  Maggie was used to her mother’s insults, but she wasn’t up to dealing with them today. She had thought Mike wanted her, but she was wrong. He only wanted sex. That discovery made her feel as bad about herself as she did before the fairy Nissa gave her the gift of fitting in. Once again, the fairy’s gift wasn’t going exactly as she had hoped.

  “Yeah, that’s right mother. You can dress up your daughter, but still no one wants her. Are we done here?” Maggie met her mother’s stare who smiled at her.

  “Remember what I said.”

  “Yeah, I got it. In my room. For a month. No problem. It’s pretty much where I live anyway.”

  “And you’re damn lucky to have it,” her mother yelled at her.

  Maggie went to her room. She heard what her mother said, but she wasn’t about to abide by it. She was done being her mother’s prisoner…in more ways than one.

  Maggie sat next to Bella at lunch wearing a long face that complimented her black jeans and gray shirt. It was how she felt. Bella was busy in exaggerated chatter with a few of the girls they ate lunch with.

  “Your party was divine. I had so much fun. Didn’t you Maggie?” Jennifer’s eyes were focused on her.

  “Yeah, it was great.” It bothered her that Jennifer was staring. She looked away.

  “What’s wrong with her?” Ali directed her question to Bella who leaned forward as if to whisper so the conversation would remain private,

  However, the volume of Bella’s voice didn’t surprise Maggie. She never kept anything private. She enjoyed being the bearer of all gossip. “Well,” she began with a sigh. “She and Mike hooked up and….”

  “Bella,” Maggie shot at her. “It’s no one’s business.”

  Bella sat back with a thud, her closed mouth forming a frown. She folded her arms.

  Even though she stopped Bella from saying anymore, Maggie knew it was enough to spread through the school like a wildfire in a dry forest devoid of water.

  Maggie thought it better to add her own two cents hoping to lessen the rumors that would soon circulate.

  “We kissed. That was it. He just hasn’t spoken to me since.”

  “Not a good kisser, huh?” Sophia chided. “Didn’t you get some hints from Bella? She’s one of the best.”

  Maggie stood up, pushing her chair several feet back. Her eyes fell on Bella who smiled innocently up at her. Was fitting in worth all this?

  She stormed out of the cafeteria. As she entered the hall, she slammed into a female carrying a few books that fell to the floor.

  “Damn it, I’m sorry.” Maggie rolled her head in exasperation. “What else can go wrong?” She bent over to pick up the books

  “Oh, I don’t know. Fail a math test, get hit by a car.”

  Maggie looked up to see Charlotte. She smiled, remembering she too had a nickname—Charlie-- then she quickly handed the books to her and stepped back.

  “Thanks.”

  “I was the one who made you drop them. No thanks needed.”

  “Hey, did you….”

  Maggie walked away. The last thing she needed was her friends seeing her talk to the school lesbian. That would be fuel for one more thing they would throw her way. She could hear it now. You didn’t tell us you were gay. You got a thing for girls now? She could see the leers that would accompany the false accusations.

  When Maggie got to her class, Bella was waiting by the door, leaning against the wall, arms folded. She smiled warmly.

  “Sorry. Sometimes I get carried away. Forgive me?”

  Maggie looked away.

  “I know something that might make you feel better,” she purred.

  “What.” Maggie’s tone was indignant.

  Bella leaned forward and whispered. “Mike asked me about you.

  Maggie’s head snapped. “What do you mean?”

  “Well,” she drawled, “he really enjoyed my party—if you know what I mean. He’s wondering why you’re ignoring him.”

  Maggie’s face reflected the incredulous feeling that punched her in the gut. “I haven’t been ignoring him, and you know that. He’s been ignoring me.”

  Bella laughed. “Is that why you’ve been so depressing? God, I couldn’t stand to be around you.” She pushed off the wall. “If you were that into him, why didn’t you go find him today?”

  “He left me—naked and in the bedroom,” she hissed. “What was I supposed to think?”

  “Maybe that you’d see him at school today?” Bella smiled again. “You really do have a lot to learn. Come on, we’re gonna be late for class.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Even with a few weeks left of her punishment in lock-up, she found ways to sneak out. By the time her sentence was lifted by her frustrated mother who gave up keeping her sequestered to her room, Maggie had become entwined with the in-crowd like ivy growing up a wall.

  Soon, she was drinking, smoking, and spending many more unfulfilling sexual encounters with Mike. Her grades were failing, and she kept all of it hidden from her mother which wasn’t difficult because her mother had found another boyfriend.

  Maggie was becoming hard-hearted. It wasn’t until she walked into the kitchen one day and her mother was sitting at the table with an envelope resting in front of her that she realized she really didn’t care about anything anymore.

  Her mother’s face was full of lines—hard lines that read like a history book of her life. Tonight, they were deep crevices sharpened with anger and frustration. Years of smoking added to the topographic features of her face. It was the first time Maggie noticed how old and worn her mother looked.

  She sighed helplessly, knowing it wasn’t good as she lowered herself onto a chair. She waited for her mother to speak, but no words escaped her lips. Instead, tears fell from the corner of her eyes and slid down the cracks and fissures of her skin like a creek running down the side of a mountain.

  Maggie’s first thought was Aunt Agnes was hurt or worse, had died. “Mom, what is it? What’s wrong?” she asked anxiously.

  Her mother picked up a spoon and began to stir her coffee. She kept her eyes on the mug. “I never wanted kids, you know.”

  Shocked at what her mother just said, Maggie replied, “Gee, thanks.”

  Keeping her eyes on the mug, she continued. “Neither did your father. You…,”she put the spoon down and took a sip, “were a mistake.”

  Maggie felt her insides crumble.

  “But we got used to being parents, and I’ll admit, there were times we even liked it—your father more than me. But we always promised each other if one of us were to die before you were old enough to get out on your own, the other would make sure they got you there.

  “We weren’t perfect—far from it. I know that. Your father knew it. But we did the best we could.”

  Maggie bit her tongue to keep herself from voicing what she was really thinking—her parent’s best really sucked.

  Her mother picked up the envelope and waved it at her. “How long have you been failing?”

  “What do you care?”

  “Did you not listen to a word I said? If you fail, then you’re held back in school another year.” Her mother leaned forward. “You’ll be here, not on your own where you should be next year. Do you really want to stay here one more year?” Her mother tossed the envelope to her then stood up. “Get your shit together.” She put her mug in the sink and left the room.

  It was time to visit the fairies.

  Maggie read the letter on her way to the woods. It informed her mother that she was failing all her classes. She balled the piece of paper and stuffed it in her hoodie pocket. She wasn’t surprised. She couldn’t remember the last time she did homework.

  She pulled out the cigarette she swiped from her mother’s purse before she left. She lit it and took a long drag to stifle the craving she had had since she walked into the kitchen and heard her mother’s confession—if that’s what it was
.

  She strolled down the path into the woods and suddenly stopped. What if they didn’t show up? What if she was on her own? She hadn’t been to the woods since the day Nissa gave her the gift to fit in.

  Her life wasn’t going the way she expected. Had she abused the gift? She was having sex, drinking, and smoking. She started walking again. At least she wasn’t doing drugs. So what if she was failing her classes? She used to get straight A’s before she was a part of the in-crowd, and she hated school. Now she was popular, and she loved school. So, no, in her eyes she hadn’t abused the gift. She had gotten what she wanted--to fit in.

  “Is anyone here? Nissa? Blue Fairy?”

  She was looking up at the trees when she tripped on a log. She was able to catch her balance before she toppled into a fairy’s home that was perched on the top of a cut log. It looked like a miniature high-rise

  A rope ladder with rungs made out of petrified mushroom’s rose from the ground to the top of the log. The door to the fairy home was on the lower level. It was painted red with a long, ornate door handle. A piece of antler adorned the top of the door making it look like a half porch roof. A smaller log rose from above that with stones embedded into it reaching up to a piece of driftwood that sat on top.

  The door opened, and a fairy with long, dark hair peered out. “Who’s there?”

  “It’s me, Maggie.”

  “Maggie, who?”

  “You know. Maggie.”

  The fairy’s eyes scanned up and down Maggie. “Oh, the Maggie.”

  Maggie sat on the ground in front of the house. “So, you do know me.”

  The door opened wide to allow the fairy’s long, full red dress to pass the threshold. “No, I don’t know you.” She folded her hands in front of her. “I know of you.”

  “The way you say that...doesn’t make me sound very good.”