by Leta Blake
“I put the lights on earlier,” Joel said over his shoulder. “It’s the least fun part, and it got my mind off… Well, I had some time to kill.”
“It’s great. I love colored lights.” In that moment, he decided he’d only use colored lights on his own tree from then on.
As Joel unpacked the groceries on the kitchen counter, his eyes grew wider and wider.
“It’s not a big deal,” Casey hurried to explain. “Chips and salsa for a snack. And popcorn, of course, for stringing on the tree if we want. Or we can just eat it. But then I saw those doughnuts, and I figured if I was going to stay the night again—which you pretty much said I was?”
Joel nodded.
“Well, then I thought I might as well get breakfast. So… eggs, sausage, doughnuts, and some cereal, in case you thought the doughnuts were too sweet. I grabbed another box of oatmeal since I knew you were out. Got the same kind. And then I couldn’t resist the Oreos since I know how much you loved them when we were kids.” He pulled out the rest of the food as Joel watched. “For tonight, I thought I’d pan fry some steaks and roast the veggies. The cake is for dessert, and the beer and wine are for whenever.”
“You must have spent a fortune.”
Casey’s gut twisted. He’d spent barely anything in his estimation, especially after acclimating to New York prices. How little must Joel be living on these days?
“Let me pay you for the oatmeal and half of everything else,” Joel said, wiping a hand over his upper lip nervously.
“What’d I say? You bring the tree and I bring the food, and we’d be even. You’ve got the tree?”
Joel nodded. “The one that cut me.”
“Well, then we’re good. And we’ll show that bitch of a tree. We’ll dress her right up in ornaments and bulbs, and she’ll never know what hit her.”
Joel smirked. “I love yo—that.” His dark eyes flicked up to Casey’s face and then down again. “I love that idea.”
“Right. I love that too,” Casey said, but he jerked his chin toward Joel, hoping he’d accept the semi-declaration without a fuss.
Joel seemed eager enough to let his momentary slip of tongue fade away, so he started putting the groceries away. “This is too much, but I’ll take it. It’s Christmas, and you’re a pretty cute Santa. I guess I’ll pay you with sex later.”
Casey laughed. “Only if you don’t really mean it as a payment.”
Joel grinned wickedly. It made Casey’s blood race. “Oh, you know I’d do it for free.”
“Just checking. I don’t want you to feel obligated. That’s not what this is about.”
“I’m an asshole, remember? I wouldn’t have sex with you for groceries. I’d sooner catch my dinner in the lake. As I have before, and I will again.”
Casey frowned. The idea of Joel having to eat what he caught from the lake was awful.
Joel showed him around the kitchen. “The pans are there, the seasoning there, and potholders here. Let’s get a couple of beers open.” He grabbed the opener from a drawer. “Yee-Haw, dude? That brand’s too rich for my blood.” But Joel drank it, moaning sweetly when he took a big sip.
Casey’s heart flipped over, and he quickly tasted his own beer to cover it up.
At the kitchen table, they worked together to prep the veggies for roasting. Bruno was busy being adorable at their feet, casting his wide eyes up at them hopefully.
After Joel got up to grab a second beer, he sat across from Casey, studied him for a long moment, and then asked, “Why’d you tell RJ about us?”
“What?” Casey’s stomach caught. Joel didn’t sound angry exactly, but he did sound wary.
“He told Becca. She called me because I hadn’t told her myself. That’s the chain of events, in case you were wondering.”
“Oh.” Casey’s cheeks went hot, and if his ears could catch on fire, they’d be flaming.
“What did you say to him anyway?”
“Becca didn’t know?”
“She did, but… Yeah, she did.” Joel’s pale cheeks pinked up, and he took a long swig from his beer. “I guess I don’t mind. You didn’t say anything bad.”
“I thought… I mean, I thought he was trustworthy.”
“He probably is. Usually Becca’s like a steel trap. RJ tells her whatever, and it stays between them with no escape. But this time, since the gossip included me, and she considers me ‘hers,’ she let me know.” He shifted awkwardly, like he wasn’t telling the entire truth, but Casey didn’t know why. “She’s protective of me. Like a big sister who’s magically the same age or whatever.” He looked embarrassed to have a friend who cared about him.
“I’m sorry if I violated your trust by telling him what I did. For what it’s worth, I didn’t out you. He’d already figured out that you were gay a long time ago.”
“I know. It’s fine.”
“I was excited when I left this morning. I thought I’d burst if I didn’t tell someone how I was feeling.”
Joel’s sweet mouth crooked up. “I guess that’s a compliment.”
“It’s more than a compliment, it’s—” Casey took a deep breath. “My feelings for you are—”
“Not now. None of that.” Joel’s eyes twinkled as he sat back in his chair, pointing at Casey with his beer. “Make my dinner, slave.”
Casey let all talk of feelings drop. Joel was still too skittish to go there. “Oh, you do role-play? Jumping right from virgin to advanced sexual kink. I’m impressed.”
Joel snarled adorably. “You should be.”
Casey laughed, grabbing the salt and pepper from the spices Joel had pulled down. He spiced the veggies and popped them into the warm oven before grabbing the package of steaks from the fridge.
After spicing the meat, he melted butter in the pan until it was sizzling. Then he placed the steaks side by side, filling Joel’s entire cook pan with all four slices of meat.
Joel watched with a craving in his eyes that Casey wasn’t entirely sure was lust so much as actual physical hunger. The idea of Joel not having enough money for food made him ache. Couldn’t he take a salary from Vreeland’s? Could the store really not afford it? Casey knew better than to ask that now, though. Not if he actually wanted to get laid tonight. That conversation would just lead to a fight.
But seriously, Joel’s stupid pride!
Casey wondered what it was about the emotion that got under men’s skin. His father was driven by pride, and so was Joel’s dad. He’d be lying if he didn’t indulge in excesses of it himself. Exploring his pride, and the way it limited him, was something he was doing with Ann to a degree—plus figuring out how to be a person to be proud of, and how to stop conflating his father’s pride in him—or lack thereof—with his pride in himself.
“A penny for your thoughts.”
“Ah, you wouldn’t want them,” Casey said, smiling. “They’re totally fifth- or sixth-date material.”
Joel rolled his eyes but didn’t insist.
Dinner went quickly, with Joel stuffing himself on the steak and veggies. Bruno got some meat too, but the third steak went into the fridge as leftovers, and Casey could see that Joel was already eagerly looking forward to eating it tomorrow.
With both their bellies full, they turned to trimming the tree. Joel popped a copy of National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation in his old DVD player, and both of them were laughing before the opening scenes had even played out. As they watched, popcorn was popped and strung together with needles and thread. Four sore, bloody thumbs later, they strung the popcorn garland around the upper boughs and branches, leaving the lower ones free of temptation for Bruno.
“I should have brought Christmas cookies instead of Oreos,” Casey lamented as they cracked open the boxes of ornaments. “Why didn’t I think of that?”
On the small screen, Chevy Chase and his family continued to mess up Christmas for everyone, but Casey was having the most perfect Christmas experience of his life in Joel’s cozy trailer. Aside from the lack of cookie
s.
“I have some frozen cookie dough,” Joel offered. “I bought it from Brandon’s son for his school’s band fundraiser today. Expensive as hell, but I couldn’t tell him no. Not as his dad’s boss.”
“Get them out!” Casey hung up a bright orange ball with the words “Tennessee Volunteers” scrolled in white. It was from the box of older ornaments from Joel’s pop’s house. “Make some!”
Once the scent of baking cookies filled the air, they finished up the tree and eventually collapsed on the sofa with a plate of delicious chocolate chip cookies and grins of satisfaction.
“It looks great.” Casey put his arm around Joel’s shoulder, dragging him in close before grabbing another cookie from the plate. “Beautiful.”
“It’s festive,” Joel agreed. “I wonder what happened to the star, though.” He frowned up at the bare top branch. “I thought I packed it with all the rest.”
Casey shrugged. “It still looks good.”
The Griswolds finished up their Christmas adventure, and the screen went blank. Joel aimed the remote and turned it off. “And that’s all I’ve got for entertainment. My streaming services are all turned off for now.” He scooted away from Casey and grabbed his phone from the coffee table. “I have Internet still and a free Pandora subscription. If you don’t mind ads?”
“I don’t mind them.”
“Christmas music or…?”
“Let’s keep with the theme for the evening.”
Joel got up and turned on a small Bluetooth speaker placed on a shelf of books by the only overstuffed chair in the room. Casey made a mental note to look for any Joel Grimsbane titles there the next time he was alone in the room.
“Pandora is always a mixed bag. No promises.”
The first song began with the clomping of reindeer hooves and a big band swinging beat. A 1950s-sounding woman’s voice broke into the familiar words of “Sleigh Ride.”
Joel laughed, his head falling back. “Christ, it’s merry as shit up in here.”
Casey stood and gripped Joel’s hand. “Dance with me.”
Joel shook his head, but he didn’t pull away. “I can only do the swaying thing. Nothing fancy.”
“So? It’s a fun song. Let’s dance.”
Joel’s elbows were a health hazard, and their ridiculous dance moves drove Bruno out of the room and out his dog door. The next song was Perry Como’s “Silver Bells,” and they kept on with their awkward movements, laughing and bumping into each other in the close quarters.
“You’re lame,” Joel muttered, sweaty and apparently finished. He collapsed on the sofa with another beer in one hand and a cookie in the other.
“You loved it.”
Joel shrugged, filling his mouth with cookie so he wouldn’t have to answer. Casey dropped down beside him and grabbed his own beer from the side table. It was lucky they hadn’t tipped it over with the “dancing.” “I looked up your books this afternoon.”
Joel swallowed his chocolatey mouthful. “Yeah?”
“I bought one, even. The werewolf one? But I admit I didn’t have time to read any of it yet. My Kindle was charged and ready to go, but I had to listen to another lecture from my mother instead.”
Joel’s mouth quirked. “About what?”
“About… You know what? Never mind.”
Joel shook his head, pointing at Casey with his beer again. “You brought it up. Tell me.”
Casey sighed, kicked his feet up onto the coffee table, and leaned his head back on the sofa. “She tried to set me up with the son of my father’s boss. I wasn’t interested, and she’s not impressed with what she sees as the reason why.”
“Me?”
Casey shook his head, staring up at the smooth, white ceiling. “She doesn’t know about us. But she does think I’m chasing after you fruitlessly. She thinks I’m making a fool of myself.”
“Funny. Today must be a day for setups.” Joel snorted. “My employee, Angel, is trying to fix me up with her stepbrother.”
“Oh.” Casey didn’t like the way his stomach curled up at that.
“I’m not interested,” Joel said, nudging Casey with his elbow. “I’ve already got my holiday fling sorted.”
“I told you, let’s not call it a fling.”
“It’s definitely not a hookup,” Joel said primly, which made Casey want to laugh through his own jealousy.
“No. It’s not.”
“Let’s not call it anything.” Joel’s voice took on a vulnerable quality that made Casey’s insides quiver and his cock get hard. “Not yet.”
“Okay,” Casey agreed, but he really wanted to argue. He wanted to pin Joel down and make him say words about their feelings and their potential future. Because, if he could have this, maybe everything else in his life was negotiable. If he could have Joel, the rest of his so-called “life plans” could go suck a dick.
Speaking of…
“Hey,” Casey whispered. “Want to fool around on the sofa? Or should we head back to your room?”
Joel set his beer aside. Casey followed suit, ready to stand and let Joel lead him back to his dark room again.
“Here’s good,” Joel muttered, leaning over to take hold of Casey’s chin before kissing him hard.
Casey moaned, surprised at Joel’s aggression, and even more so when Joel climbed onto his lap, grinding his jean-clad ass down against Casey’s trapped, hard dick.
“Fuck, you’re so hot,” Joel whispered, rubbing his stubble against Casey’s cheeks, shivering at the combined scratch of their evening stubble.
A warm, slow-jazz version of “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” slipped around them, and Casey groaned as Joel’s kiss slowed to match the vibe of the song.
“Get it out,” Joel whispered wetly in his ear. “I want to see it.”
Casey fumbled with his pants, trying to get them open with Joel still half on his lap and distracting him by sucking on his earlobe as he made impatient little noises.
Finally, Casey’s pants were down around his hips and his dick was free. Joel whistled low and quiet. “It’s so nice,” he murmured, running the tip of his finger up the shaft and circling under the helmet. “Can I hold it again?”
Casey nodded, moving his hand aside to allow Joel to take control. Joel sat back, ass on Casey’s knees, gazing solemnly down at it. Casey’s heart pounded, and his cock thudded, growing harder and harder in Joel’s hand. He could feel his pulse rising, and he squirmed, trying to get Joel to stroke or do something. Anything but just hold him like his cock was delicate.
“I want to suck it.” Joel’s voice was gravelly. The lights from the Christmas tree sparkling in his dark hair.
Casey’s cock ached already, hard and needy in Joel’s hand, but those words robbed him of breath.
Joel’s dark eyes met his, dark pools of defenselessness and lust. He shifted off Casey’s lap to stretch out on the sofa, sprawled on his stomach, his hand never leaving Casey’s cock. He gazed at him worshipfully. “Please? I want to try.”
Casey nodded dumbly, slipping his fingers into Joel’s hair before guiding him slowly to his cock. Joel’s breath against the head was almost too much. Casey squirmed, and his hips bucked up, bumping his cock against Joel’s lower lip.
“Sorry,” he whispered. “Take your time. It’s okay. You’re just so sexy, Joel. Fuck.”
Joel took a slow, deep breath. He swallowed hard, and then opened.
Casey’s toes curled up as Joel’s hot, wet mouth surrounded his leaking cockhead. He groaned softly, biting his lower lip and trying to hold perfectly still when all he wanted was to get further into Joel, to fuck into his throat.
Joel took him in. Saliva slipped out of his mouth and down Casey’s length, wetting Joel’s fist where he gripped Casey at the root.
“Yeah, that’s…” Casey threw his head back but kept his eyes slitted on Joel, watching him work to take more of him in, to go deeper.
Joel gagged and pulled off, his eyes watering and his cheeks fl
ushing.
“Don’t worry,” Casey whispered, twining his fingers in Joel’s hair a little tighter. “It’s perfect.”
He wasn’t lying. Despite the occasional scrape of teeth and the lack of expertise, Casey had never felt anything as perfect as his cock in Joel’s mouth.
Blinking away tears from the gagging, Joel bent back to work. He licked Casey’s slit. Casey’s legs shook, and he begged Joel to suck him again. Casey glimpsed Joel’s self-satisfied smirk before he complied.
It was too good, too much. Casey’s pulse roared, his cock stiffened even harder, and he felt the rush of orgasm barreling his way. Joel’s tongue and soft inner cheeks were a gorgeous torment, and he wasn’t going to last much longer.
“That’s it. I’m close,” he warned. “Oh, fuck. Now. It’s…now.”
He let go of Joel’s hair, freeing him to pull off, and yet Joel only took him in deeper, choking gently, his dark eyes glowing with feeling. When the first spurt landed on Joel’s tongue, he cried out in surprise, backing off Casey’s cock in shock.
Casey held Joel’s wide gaze as orgasm grabbed him. He convulsed in pleasure, pumping jizz into Joel’s open mouth, spilling it down his chin, and shooting a thick stream of it all over his face.
“Holy shit,” Joel sputtered, his dark eyes pools of wild lust. He scooped come from his cheek and forehead and shoved it into his mouth. “You taste so…fuck.”
He knew what Joel meant. When Joel had come in his mouth the night before, it’d been perfect: sweet and dirty, filthy and pure, all at the same time.
Their taste was everything. They were everything.
On Joel’s sofa, beside the colored lights of his starless Christmas tree, Casey had never been happier.
Just like the night before, Casey’s come tasted kinda gross but also so fucking good. It was a paradox Joel couldn’t quite understand. He scooped another finger-full from his chin and pushed it in his mouth, his cock ragingly hard in his jeans and his eyes rolling back in his head. He moaned gently.
