by Ruth Schwenk
• In what aspect of your motherhood are you most tempted right now to live for people’s approval more than God’s approval?
Carry Each Other’s Burdens
Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
—GALATIANS 6:2
Several years ago I was rushing through a parking lot carrying several grocery bags when I could feel the bottom of one of the bags beginning to give out. It started as a small tear but was quickly turning into a gaping hole! Any second, my fresh produce would be all over the ground.
My son saw the bag ripping and came running to put his hands underneath the deteriorating paper bag. Just in time, he came alongside me, saving the day (or at least some groceries)!
Parenting often feels like a lot to carry. And it is a lot to hold on to. Motherhood is too hard to do alone, which is why every mom needs close friendships. We all need to be friends and have friends who are willing to “carry each other’s burdens.”
The word carry means to put upon one’s self. It is to take what is hard or burdensome for someone else and lift it up for them. A friend who carries something for you is someone who sees you struggling. She knows you are feeling wiped out or overwhelmed. She spots the “bag ripping” and runs to help relieve you, allowing you catch your breath and refuel.
We are called to “carry each other’s burdens.” We all need friends like that, but we also all need to be friends like that. Let’s not just be a friend when it’s easy. In Christ, we are joined to one another, and sometimes that even means suffering with and for one another.
Father, help me be humble enough to ask for help. Show me where I need someone else’s strength, support, or wisdom right now. And help me be the kind of friend who is helping to carry a heavy burden. In Jesus’ name, amen.
• Which of your friends is carrying a heavy burden right now? How can you help her?
• Maybe you’re carrying a heavy burden. What is one thing you can do today to reach out to a friend and ask for help?
Rest for the Weary
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
—MATTHEW 11:28–30
If there is one thing that all of us moms have in common, it’s probably feeling weary and burdened. The degree of weariness may vary from season to season, but still the weariness is there. No wonder Jesus’ invitation to come to Him and rest is so appealing.
Jesus said, “Come to me . . . and I will give you rest.” Those words got me thinking about how often I do my working, my parenting, my ministry apart from Christ. I try to do too much in my own strength and rely on my own wisdom. Soon I’m carrying things I shouldn’t and saying yes to things when I should say no. And yet Jesus invited us to come to Him. Rest is first and foremost about abiding in Him.
When we go to Jesus, it’s not that we don’t work; it’s that we work differently. We are to take His yoke upon us and learn from Him. He has promised that when we labor with Him, the weight is different. His yoke is easy, and our burden is much lighter. We experience rest.
Resting in Jesus is trusting Him with what we can’t control. Resting in Jesus is living for His approval instead of people’s approval. Resting in Jesus is surrendering our plans to His. Resting in Jesus is prayerful dependence. Resting in Jesus is humble obedience.
Are you feeling weary today? Weighed down by burdens? Take Jesus at His word. Take His yoke upon you. He who is humble and gentle has promised that you will find rest for your soul.
Father, You are wiser, more powerful, and more resourceful than I am. Thank You for saving me and sustaining me through Your Son, Jesus. Teach me to abide in You, allowing Your strength to give rest to my soul. Refresh me today. Give me strength to keep going even when life is hard. In Jesus’ name, amen.
• What aspect of your life makes you feel most weary today?
• What is one way you can let Jesus carry your burden right now?
A Gift from God
The LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
—GENESIS 2:21–22
The very first marriage was one that God joined together. The two became one because God first brought the woman to the man (Genesis 2:22). Think about that for a moment. The first marriage was a gift from God. Adam didn’t have to go out looking for Eve. He didn’t have to court her or pursue her to win her over. Likewise, Eve didn’t have to win Adam over or convince him she was the one. God took her to him as a gift. And this gift would change the rest of their lives.
Each of us as couples were joined together or brought together in our own unique ways. But behind the scenes, it was God who was ultimately behind bringing us together. We are God’s gift to each other. We have been brought together for the gift of friendship, intimacy, family, and ministry. You and your spouse were not brought together by accident!
While it may not always seem like it, our different strengths, experiences, personalities, and gifts are meant to complement, not compete with, each other. In marriage, we experience the blessing of both receiving one another and giving to one another. Ask God to help you see your spouse as a gift. Ask Him to help you love one another and serve one another. In marriage, we are God’s gift to each other!
Father, You have given my husband to me as a gift. Help me not to compete with him but to complement him. I pray that You would strengthen our marriage today by helping the two of us see each other as a gift from You and treat each other that way. In Jesus’ name, amen.
• List some specific reasons why you consider your spouse a gift.
• What is one way you can shore up your husband’s weaknesses with your strengths?
Take Fun More Seriously
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
—PROVERBS 31:25
Is your home a fun place to live? How would your kids answer that question? Their answers may tell us moms that it’s time we take fun a little more seriously!
I know, I know, motherhood is stressful and exhausting. Still, let’s not fail to give our kids the gifts of laughter, fun, and lightheartedness. We can be at ease because we know our wise and loving God is in control. Who He is changes who we are.
It might surprise you, but the Bible describes the Proverbs 31 woman, who is a person of character, as a woman who knows how to laugh. Among all of her responsibilities and activities, we’re told she was able to “laugh at the days to come.” She was not ruled by fear, consumed with worry, overcome with weariness, or worn out by preparing for what was ahead. She laughed not because she was a good comedian, but because she trusted the God who is in control.
What a great reminder for you and me! In this demanding mission of motherhood, we can sometimes take life too seriously. We can take our calling as moms too seriously. As a result, we can fail to enjoy this journey. Our fear of tomorrow can rob us of joy and laughter today. As serious as being a mom can be, let’s be sure to have some fun along the way!
Our homes are to be a safe haven and a place of refuge for our kids. But let’s also be more intentional about making our homes fun places to be. Filling our homes with joy. Playing with our kids. Laughing with our kids because we know who is really ruling the world.
Father, please help me remember throughout the day that You are in control. Don’t let fear or worry rob me of my joy. Fill our home with laughter. Let it be a place of joy and peace because of whom we know You to be. In Jesus’ name, amen.
• Do you think your kids would describe your home as fun? Why or why not?
• What are one or two things you can do to bring more fun or laughter into your home?
These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised, since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.
—HEBREWS 11:39–40
Don’t go out and try to do something great.
It might sound strange. Maybe even a little backward. But stick with me here!
I love the Hebrews 11 list of men and women who lived by faith. Each person, while acting in faith, wasn’t necessarily trying to do something big or great. When God spoke, they simply obeyed.
By faith, Noah built a boat. By faith, Abraham left his home. By faith, Moses’ parents hid him for three months. By faith, the Israelites passed through the Red Sea. By faith, Rahab welcomed and hid a few spies on the run.
All significant acts of faith. Steps of obedience. Some of the actions were risky. Others seemed crazy to a watching world. But what is worth noting about these people is that they weren’t trying to do great things. They were simply trying to be obedient. They heard God’s call, and they responded with obedience.
Where is God calling you to do the same? Is your focus on trying to do something big or great? Or are you focusing on being obedient? No matter where God has you or what He calls you to do, do it. Success in God’s eyes is obedience. So be faithful today. Listen for God’s voice. Step out in faith. Don’t worry about doing great things. Be faithful, obey, and let God do the rest!
Father, help me focus more on obeying You than doing something great. Thank You for the reminder that obedience, no matter how small the act, is success in Your eyes. By faith, I want to honor You, be used by You, and show a watching world what You are really like. In Jesus’ name, amen.
• Why is it wrong to focus on doing something great?
• In what ways does God reward you for your faith (Hebrews 11:6)?
God Uses Your Weakness
Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
—2 CORINTHIANS 12:8–9
There are plenty of opportunities for a mom to feel weak. When we haven’t managed to hop into the shower—and it’s time to make dinner. When we arrive late for Bible study . . . with no shoes for the toddler. When we see on Facebook another mom’s cupcakes for her child’s birthday party. When we end the day by counting how many balls we dropped.
For the longest time, I resisted my weakness. After all, who is proud of not having everything figured out? But God actually has a purpose for our weakness. It’s like a door that allows God to enter and begin a work in us we would never have experienced if we faked being strong. As it turns out, admitting our weakness is the first step to relying on God and not ourselves.
In the New Testament we see that the apostle Paul, in a season of intense hardship and weakness, pleaded with God to take “it” away. Nobody is entirely certain what Paul’s “it” was, but whatever it was, Paul was feeling weak.
We all have an “it.” More often than not, God transforms us in our weakness instead of taking our weakness away. He transforms us by using our weakness to teach us to rely on Him and not on our own strength or wisdom. He doesn’t wait for us to become strong, secure, confident, or healthy. God does His greatest work in and through our weakness.
God responded to Paul’s pleading with the promise that His grace and His life-giving power were enough. So, if you feel weak today, you are exactly where God wants you! Whatever you are facing, remember that God loves to reveal His power through weakness. His power is made perfect in those of us who don’t feel as if we can do it all on our own.
Father, instead of taking away my weakness, transform me. Use my weakness to teach me to rely on You, resting in Your strength and wisdom. Your grace is enough for me today. In Jesus’ name, amen.
• In what ways might God use your weakness to bring about growth as a mom?
• How is embracing your weakness not the same as being indifferent?
Establishing Traditions
“These are the LORD’s appointed festivals, the sacred assemblies you are to proclaim at their appointed times.”
—LEVITICUS 23:4
One of my favorite family traditions growing up was going to my grandparents’ house on Sunday nights. They lived about twenty minutes away from us, and each Sunday, we’d load up our car and head to their house for dinner. We’d share a meal and then sit in their living room and talk. It wasn’t anything fancy, but this weekly rhythm had a lasting impact on me.
Traditions can be powerful and practical ways for families to pass on values, celebrate important events, or create memories. Most often, traditions are associated with different holidays. We can be intentional as a family, just as God’s people were in the past, about establishing traditions that have spiritual meaning.
In the Old Testament book of Leviticus, God commanded His people to observe a series of seven feasts. These became annual traditions, filled with feasting, celebrating, offering sacrifices, and at times, confessing sins. Each of these traditions was primarily meant to pass along, from generation to generation, truths about who God is and what God had done. These were yearly opportunities for God’s people to refocus on His love, truth, and faithfulness. These feasts also pointed to what Jesus would one day do for all people.
Traditions, simple or elaborate, can leave a lasting imprint. Simple traditions may not always seem like much to us, but they can be a lasting legacy for our children. What are some simple and practical traditions that you can create for your family? More importantly, how can these yearly practices be used to pass on faith? How can your family traditions continue to point your kids toward who Jesus is and all that He has done?
Father, I confess that it is easy to forget all You have done. Help me remember Your goodness and faithfulness. As I create traditions in my family, use them to help pass on faith to my kids and grandkids. In Jesus’ name, amen.
• What family tradition had the most impact on you when you were growing up? Why was it so significant?
• What is one way you can begin establishing family traditions in your home?
The Holiness of God
Just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do.
—1 PETER 1:15
There is no one like God. He is far above all creation. He is completely unique in His character. Unmatched in His worth. He has many opponents, but no one is His rival. He is, and always will be, “holy, holy, holy” (Isaiah 6:3).
The holiness of God reminds us that He is different from us. He reigns and rules from heaven, while we live here on earth. He is perfect in all His ways. He always does what is good, pleasing, and right. Unlike us, He is pure, faithful, righteous, and without sin. And yet, by faith in Christ, God shares His holiness with us.
In and through Jesus, the Holy One makes us holy. Jesus’ purity covers our impurity. Jesus’ faithfulness covers our unfaithfulness. Our lack of holiness is swallowed up at the cross. Instead of our unrighteousness, Jesus clothes us with His. In Christ, God declares us set apart.
Peter reminded us that “he who called you is holy.” But Peter didn’t stop there. He knew that Jesus had made His people holy, and through His Spirit, He is still making us holy. So Peter continued, “Be holy in all you do.”
The holiness of God should cause us to worship. To walk humbly. To rejoice in our forgiveness. But it should also motivate us to give back what God has so graciously given us in Christ. He has made us holy, so let’s be holy, set apart, fully devoted to God in all we do!
Father, there is no one like You. You alone are worthy of my praise. You are the Creator and King over all creation. You are perfect in all Your ways. Thank You for forgiving my sin, making me clean, setting me apart in Christ by faith, and making me holy. I want to honor, revere, and serve You in all I do. In Jesus’ name, amen.
• Have you become too casual with God in any ways?
> • In what ways can the holiness of God motivate your parenting?
When You Don’t Feel Like Being a Mom
“Whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”
—MATTHEW 10:39
What do you do when you don’t feel like being a mom? How do you handle those days, weeks, or maybe months when you secretly wish you were doing anything else but changing diapers, chauffeuring kids, and listening to sibling squabbles?
I thought motherhood would always come easily. I imagined that the mothering instinct to love, care for, and nurture would be continually present and consistent. It would always feel natural. But I was wrong. The truth is, from time to time, a lot of moms don’t want to be moms.
In Matthew, Jesus gave us a helpful, if not hard, reminder. The problem is not in our parenting; the problem is in our hearts. Being a mom isn't what satisfies our hearts; it’s knowing and serving Christ. What quenches the thirst we all feel is walking in obedience wherever God has us.
As God is patiently growing us and transforming us, He is changing us from the inside out. He gently redirects us from what we think we want to what He knows we actually need. Our hearts will always be restless and wandering until we learn that only hungering and thirsting for God will truly satisfy.
When we don’t feel like being moms, we need to remember the problem is not motherhood; the problem is how we view what will truly satisfy. The blessed life, the abundant life (John 10:10), is not found in doing what we want. It’s found, Jesus said, in giving our lives away. It’s found in sacrificially loving and serving. We find life when we lose our lives. The good life is found in loving God and others, even when we don’t always feel like it! The promise, though, is good. He has promised to satisfy us with good things, even better things than what we thought.
