by R. G. Angel
Now, on top of sharing my space with her, I’d have to deal with the drama her presence in my home would cause. I had a small reprieve - my parents were in Italy for a month, but they’d be back soon enough and then what?
My mother despised the girl. Why? I wasn’t completely sure, but she wasn’t the most stable woman on the best of days… My back tingled as it did every time I thought about my mother's mental stability. She was going to be beyond furious to have her here, especially since my father always cut her meds in half when they had trips planned. I guessed that having a lobotomized wife at garden parties tended to scratch through the veneer of a perfect family.
I shrugged mentally. She’d be back on her cocktail of Xanax, Aripiprazole, and whatever else my father was feeding her ‘for her own good’ soon enough and she’d be too high to care.
As for my father, I wasn’t sure how he would take it to be honest. I was not sure how I felt about having these two under the same roof. I was not overly enamored with my father's weird fascination with the girl…. ‘Weird fascination,’ that was a nice way to put it. ‘Fucking messed-up obsession’ would be more accurate. He seemed to be living this relationship through me. What would happen when she’d be so readily available under our roof? Would he try his luck? Was she conniving enough to let him think he has a shot to get what she wanted? I glanced toward her again as the car stopped in front of the estate. Yes, of course, she was. She wasn’t innocent. She was like every other girl. She just hid it better.
I opened the door, ordered the driver to take her suitcase into the house, and gestured her to precede me in. It was not something I did to be a gentleman; it was not in my nature. I was doing it because I hated having people behind me; when I couldn’t see, I couldn’t control. And besides, it gave me a premium view of her amazing ass molded to perfection in her faded blue jeans. I might be angry, but I was still a man.
“Where are your parents?” she asked as she stepped into the hall.
“In Italy for a while.” She didn’t deserve more detail.
“It will only be…you and I?” She swallowed with apprehension. Maybe she was smarter than I thought.
“Mostly you – I’ve got school tomorrow and Friday; you’re not expected before Monday... Jetlag, you know.”
“Okay.” She nodded, looking around.
“You’d better behave, Esmeralda,” I warned her. “The guards have been ordered not to let you go and if you slip, you’ll end up at your father’s. At least you won’t get physically hurt here.”
“I’ll get hurt in other ways, though.” She seemed resigned.
I shrugged. “As long as you do what I say, when I say it, it should be fine.”
“I won’t be treated this way!” she shouted, jutting out her chin, and once again I hated that she’d found a way to impress me. Everybody was scared of me... Or at least wary. Even the Oppenheimer girl who I suspected was scared of nothing, not even Satan himself, was cautious around me. It was the natural human survival instinct, but this foolish girl seemed to be defective because she enjoyed challenging me, her father…anybody with enough power to effectively destroy her.
“I might have accepted to come back to King Caleb, to become his queen, but I will not be a shadow queen, do you understand me? I will not be in the background of my own life.”
I let out a bitter laugh. The fact she thought there was a way for it to be true was beyond laughable. I couldn’t make that happen, even if I wanted to. Not that I’d ever mention it to her. “You are right Esmeralda, you are not a shadow queen. You’re no queen at all. You’re merely a pawn on the chessboard. You’re a sacrifice – less than insignificant.”
“If I’m that insignificant, why are you keeping me here with you? Why lock me in?” she asked challengingly, crossing her arms on her chest.
Ah, that was the million-dollar question wasn’t it? “Just to prove to your father I can tame the hellion, that I'm better than him and that I deserve the place on his board.” Before she had a chance to question me again and cause my last thread of patience to vanish, I waved my hand dismissively. “Other than that, you can do whatever you want. I don’t want you anymore. I can’t touch someone like you.” I wrinkled my nose in disgust except I wasn’t completely sure it was directed at her.
She took a step back, visibly hurt by my words even if she was trying to hide it. Good. Hurt, Esmeralda. There’s so much more where that came from.
“In public, you will behave and be a good fiancée. In private you do your thing and I do mine. I wash my hands of you, just be discreet.”
“You... Don't care anymore?”
Was it disappointment that I could hear in her voice? I nodded. “No, I really don’t. I’ve requested from your father your old phone and computer; they’re being brought into your room now. Call your boyfriend for all I care.” I was impressed with myself and my ability to hide the jealousy caused by my own words. I didn't want her to misinterpret my jealousy. I was not jealous because I cared, not anymore. No, I was just never good at sharing my toys.
I sighed looking at my watch. “Benjamin will show you to your room. I have to go; don’t wait up,” I added and left the house. I’d let her puppy eyes get the best of me.
I drove to the Stonewood Club - ‘Our gentlemen’s club’ as my father had proudly announced on my induction when I was thirteen. A club that was created by the Astor and Forbes families back in 1852.
It was a stuffy, old-fashioned place that I only visited on rare occasions, but today I was running away from my home. I needed an outlet for my frustration and the club was the best available now because fucking Esmeralda was out of the question and Aleksandra was too clingy to give it another shot.
The valet rushed to open my door, completely disregarding the car before mine, another plus of being of the bloodline of the club’s founding members. I threw him my keys and walked into the club.
“Mr. Astor, what a pleasure to have you here today,” said the club Majordomo as he helped me out of my jacket.
“Is there anybody available for fencing?” I replied. I needed to take my frustration away and nothing could quite take the edge off than pretend-stabbing an adversary multiple times. As an expert swordsman, I rarely lost a match.
“I believe Mr. McAllister is here, sir. I can enquire if you wish.”
“Which McAllister? Stuart is a decent opponent, but if it is Leopold, don't bother asking. I’d get a better bout from the training dummy.”
The Majordomo’s lips tipped up in a half-smile. “Stuart, sir, I would never offer Sir Leopold.”
“Very well. I’ll go get ready. Tell Stuart I’ll be in the Blue Room.”
“Very good, sir,” the Majordomo said before turning on his heel and striding away.
And for the next hour I fenced, winning every point and never conceding one. I knew I was lethal both in life and on the piste. I was aggressive, conniving, strategic and athletic. Stuart hadn't held a chance, but at least I was now sore and tired enough to go home and let Esmeralda’s presence go.
I took my time to relax, bathed in the hammam, even grabbed dinner in my family’s private salon, before going home quite late into the night.
“Did she give you a hard time?” I asked Benjamin as he met me in the corridor to take my jacket. I wondered if this man ever slept at all. It didn’t matter what time I came back, he was always there to tend to my needs.
“No Sir, I haven't seen Miss Forbes since I showed her to her room.”
I frowned, turning toward him. “What do you mean?”
He straightened, giving me a wary look. “I’m not sure I understand your question, sir.”
“Did she stay in her room the whole time? What did she have for dinner?”
“The windows and door alerts are on, sir, and they remained silent, so yes, she stayed in her room. As for dinner, she didn’t.”
My frown deepened. “Have you offered her food?”
“Of course!” Benjamin scoffed, clearly off
ended. It was rare for him to lose his perfect composure, but he’d been working for my family since before I was born and he was better than perfect. I decided to let his lack of decorum slide. “I enquired to her room twice, sir, but she politely refused the first time and didn’t respond the second time.”
I nodded, grinding my teeth so hard I was surprised they didn't shatter in my mouth. I tightened my hands into fists. The anger and frustration I thought I’d left at the club was back with a vengeance.
I took the stairs two at the time and by the time I reached her room, my anger had grown further, almost blinding every coherent thought I could have. I pounded my fist against the door with all I had. “Esmeralda, open the door!” I roared, pounding on the door again. “I swear Esmeralda if you don’t open…”
“You what?”
I sighed with relief at the sound of her voice which annoyed me even more. No Caleb, don't feel relief. You don’t care, remember?
“You’ll have dinner with me now!” I ordered, not sure why. I’d already had dinner and spending time with her was the last thing I should want…and yet.
“No.”
“No? No?!” I glared at the door, wishing it to burn away. I had a master key to open it, but I didn't want to have to use that trick now.
“No.”
“Esmeralda, if you don't come now and stop acting like a spoiled brat, I swear I will treat you like the temperamental child you seem to be. You will not be allowed outside of this house. I will take your WiFi away and alter the mobile signal to your room. You will be cut off from the world.” My chest was heaving under the rapid breathing my anger caused.
“Do what you need to do,” she replied so coolly I wanted to break the door down.
“Fine! Starve! See if I care,” I shouted, rushing back downstairs. “She is not to leave this house!” I ordered Benjamin, pointing at the stairs.
“Sir, I’m not sure this–”
“Nothing, Benjamin! If she wants to act like a victim, I’ll treat her as such!”
How was it she was turning the tables on me? I wanted to unsettle her, grate on her nerves and she managed to get me to unravel.
I needed to distance myself; she was my kryptonite.
Chapter 4 - Esme
The funny thing about hunger is you get hungry and then you reach a level where you are so hungry you don't even feel it anymore.
It’d been two days since I’d moved in with Caleb and I had yet to exit the room. He’d kept his word though, and I’d lost internet connection and phone signal impressively fast.
It wasn’t a big deal. I was busy rereading my mom’s journal anyway. I’d been lucky it was in my bag when Caleb had appeared at the café. I’d been expecting them – it had been the reason I’d called Ben. Why Ben though? I feared I’d got him on Caleb’s hit list given he was being territorial as shit. He clearly didn’t want me anymore and yet he hated the idea of anyone else having me. This was Spoiled Child 101: I don't want my toy, but it doesn’t mean you can have it either.
I’d thought that calling him would make the slip-up more believable. A young woman in like with a boy is more likely to make mistakes. I knew I had made lots of them with Caleb… Ben, I had no choice other than to say ‘like’ because it was not love. It couldn’t have been love – not when Caleb unraveled me with a look much more than Ben ever could.
I rolled my eyes at the thought of Caleb. It had to be the lack of food making me confused... Yeah that was it.
I closed my eyes and turned to the side, ready for another snooze. At least when I was sleeping, I was not thinking too much.
I opened my eyes as my door opened. How did that happen? I was sure I’d locked it.
“You need to get up, sister of mine,” Archie ordered, but the deep affection in his voice and loving smile made my heart constrict in my chest.
I shook my head. Wasn't it too early in the starvation process to be suffering hallucinations?
Archie walked to the window and opened the heavy blackout curtain, letting the unforgiving winter sun enter my room and making me hiss like a pissed-off vampire. No, it was definitely real.
He chuckled. “You need to chill, Lestat; it's only a little light.”
I glared. “I’m not Lestat. I'm a girl.”
He leaned against one of the carved posts at the foot of the bed. “With the way you look right now? I'm not sure.”
I rolled my eyes, nestling more comfortably into the feather pillow from heaven.
“Why so sullen, sourpuss?”
“I went from Lestat to sourpuss? Damn brother, I love you too.”
He grabbed my foot and nudged me. “Come on, twin. Talk to me.”
“I came back to deal with…” I looked around, not sure there wasn't a bug in the room.
“I know why you came back.”
“And I’m stuck in this room. I need to do something, solve this. Caleb forbade me to go out.”
“Maybe it’s because you are refusing to eat and stay locked in your room.”
I frowned. How did he know that? And how did he even manage to–
“How did you manage to come here anyway? If Father or Caleb think you’re an ally…”
He shook his head. “Caleb doesn’t care.”
That hurt me more than I cared to admit. Caleb told me he was done with me and it seemed that was true.
Archie shook his head. “I don’t mean it like that.” He could so easily read me. It was no wonder he'd suspected my desire to escape from the start.
“Yes you do. Caleb told me he was done with me.”
Archie rolled his eyes. “Whatever you say, Esme… But he is the one asking me and Oppenheimer to come and ‘knock some sense into her and stop her childish temper tantrum’.”
“Are you siding with him?” I asked, feeling both incredulous and betrayed.
“The day I side with an Astor will be the day Hell freezes over, but you do need to shake it off, okay? You catch more flies with honey than vinegar. I’m not sure where the investigation is going to take us, but antagonizing Caleb might not be the most productive way to deal with things.”
I crossed my arms on my chest and pouted. I hated that his words made sense.
He chuckled. “That’s the spirit.”
“What if Father finds out you're here? You’ll be blowing your cover.”
He grinned. “No, he knows I am here. He encouraged it, at least he thinks he did. I’m a double…” he cocked his head to the side. “Triple? Ah, I'm not sure… Triple agent?”
“I think I'm having a stroke,” I said.
He stuck his tongue out. “What I'm saying is that I explained to Father my doubts at Caleb's ability to rein in such an unruly girl.” He ignored the glare I was giving as he continued. “And Caleb disrespected father quite significantly when he took your side.”
“He never took my side!”
Archie sighed. “Yes he did, consciously or not, he did… When he stopped Father from hitting you, that was an act of rebellion.” He raised his hand on seeing I was about to argue. “No matter what Caleb’s reason was, it is not something Father will easily forget. His power comes from a place of fear and Caleb showed he did not fear him, at least not enough.” He sat at the foot of my bed. “Anyway, Father would love for Caleb to fail so he can put him back in his place. So that’s why I'm here to spy on you and report back.”
“I see…”
He grinned. “But I will be working for us – you and I – and give him the information we need him to believe.”
“So you’re a double agent.”
“Basically.”
I nodded. “You’re good at this.”
“Thanks for the compliment.”
I cocked my head to the side. “To be fair, I'm not sure it was meant to be one.”
He rolled his eyes, stood up, and laid across from me, turning to face me. “I think part of me always knew.”
“Knew what?”
He let his hand slide across th
e silky bedspread and rested it on top of mine. “That you were alive.”
I frowned. “How?”
He sighed, shaking his head. “I don’t know. It makes no sense. I can’t explain it to myself, so explaining to you would be close to impossible. But it felt like this part of me was missing somewhere. I thought it was because mom had died, but no, it was you… It was always you. When you pulled me into your arms that day it was like the dull pain I didn't even notice anymore faded completely, like a band just snapped into place and it terrified me. I hated it.”
“You hated feeling complete?”
“I hated for my pain, or lack of it, to be so intrinsically linked to someone so hell-bent on leaving me. I’d loved one person before and she'd left me behind… I didn’t think I'd be strong enough to go through this again.”
I turned my hand in order to hold his. “I’m not going to leave you again. Even after we find out who killed her, I’ll find a way to stay.”
He smiled. “Yes, we’ll find a way.”
“I’ve reread her journal and made a list of potential suspects… Father’s in it.”
Archie sighed and nodded. “Yes, I expected him to be. I just hope it isn’t him.”
“Why?” I asked, somehow taken aback by this. Did he want Father to remain on the throne?
“Because he already took so much from me, much more than I’m ready to admit. If he did that – took away the one ray of light I had in my life…” He turned on his back, staring at the ceiling. “I’m not sure how I’d deal with it.”
“It might be someone not in the journal.”
Archie shrugged. “Maybe.” He took a deep breath. “Is there any clue about who gave you the journal in there?”
I shook my head. That would have been so great. “No, Mom only refers to that person a couple of times and calls him ‘her ally’.”
Archie nodded. “Could I–” He stopped and the emotion in his eyes hurt me too. “Could I read it?”
“Of course! It’s your mother’s too.”
“Yes, but she wrote it for you.”
