by R. G. Angel
I hadn’t recalled much about the swimming pool incident, but I remembered him begging me to stay. I had heard his voice in the void swallowing me and somehow I had fought to come back for him. This realization had shaken me, making me unsure if I could ever completely move on from him.
Don’t lie to yourself. You know you won’t.
The light knock on the door brought me back to reality. I looked at it, unsure of what to say or do. Was it really Caleb? If it wasn’t and I answered, it wouldn’t be possible for me to close the door again.
“Esmeralda, it’s me.” His deep voice made me sigh with relief.
I opened the door and he detailed me from head to toe before nodding his approval. “Wise choice,” he said as he extended his hand to me.
I took a second to do the same. He was dressed casually - well casually for Caleb which meant black dress pants and a pale blue shirt that matched his eyes. He’d rolled up the sleeves to his elbows, showing his powerful forearms. His strong pale smooth hand extended toward me.
“We have to be the image of the happy couple, Esmeralda. Hopefully it will help with both of my parents. I know you don't want to touch me, but I think now is the time to use your acting skills again.”
I looked at him. Despite the perpetual scowl on his face, I saw genuine dismay. I understood that he took my delay in taking his hand as rejection.
I shook my head. “Caleb, it’s not that I–”
He nudged his hand toward me. “It doesn't matter.” That was a lie and we both knew it. “Just take my hand and let’s go. My father doesn’t forgo tardiness.”
We found his parents already waiting in the dining room. His father was standing by the fireplace in a position eerily similar to the one Caleb had adopted the night he had given me the car.
Like father, like son. I hoped as hell that saying was wrong.
James turned toward us, the light in his eyes turning lustful. Caleb squeezed my hand almost to the point of pain. I didn't think he’d realized it, and somehow that made me feel better. He was protective of me even if he didn't want to be.
“Ah, the lovebirds!” James beamed. He came over to us and kissed my cheeks, trailing his lips on my cheekbones and making me want to gag.
I forced a smile as Caleb squeezed my hand, though in warning or comfort I wasn’t sure.
“Don’t hold her hand so tight, dear. She is not going to run away, is she? Oh wait…” Jacklyn cackled, her voice taunting and dripping with venom.
I turned toward the seating area where she was sitting in an armchair. She wore a stunning purple dress and was holding a glass of white wine. She met my eyes, raising her glass toward me in a greeting gesture.
“Jacklyn,” James sighed. “Just drink your wine.”
Oh yeah, because getting her drunk was definitely the solution. I thought.
“Mrs. Astor,” I bowed my head at her. I was not going to take the bait. “You look stunning,” I added, and it was not a lie. She was a beautiful woman despite the alcohol, pill cocktails, and God knows what else. An amazing surgeon, Taylor would have added. I chuckled under my breath at that, getting a questioning glance from Caleb.
“I really wish I could say the same, dear. Did you misunderstand dinner for a funeral?”
The funeral of my peace of mind, certainly. I smiled wider. “I’m truly sorry my choice of garment doesn’t meet your approval.”
She stood up, helping herself by using the back of her seat. How much had she had to drink already? Or was it the pills playing their part? She didn't look high, but…. “Maybe it’s a funeral after all. Freedom is a hard thing to give up, isn’t it Esmeralda Forbes?” Her words felt like a whip.
Caleb’s hand was now squeezing mine to the point of pain again. I would almost have said he was scared, but that was a ludicrous idea. The woman was just a pill-popping alcoholic barely taller than me and so thin I couldn’t see her sideways. She was not a real threat.
James sighed, rolling his eyes at me conspiratorially as if we were best friends before turning back to his wife. “Just one evening, Jacklyn. Why don’t we top up your glass of wine?” he added, gesturing the serving staff closer.
She nodded, extending her glass toward him. She looked resigned, which wasn’t really a look I expected.
“Sorry,” Caleb whispered so softly that I wasn’t sure I’d heard him right.
I looked up at him, but he was looking straight ahead. “Let’s sit down,” he added, letting go of my hand to rest his on the small of my back, directing me to a chair.
“Why don’t you let your beautiful fiancée sit beside me?” James beamed, already pulling out the chair closest to him.
Caleb tensed, his fingers digging in my back. “No, I think it’s better for me to sit beside you so we can discuss a few business points. I’m not sure Esmeralda would like to be caught in the middle of a business talk.” He pushed me toward the chair he'd pointed at and sat on the chair his father had pulled out, creating a buffer between me and his father. Based on James’s pursed lips though, Caleb would have to pay for this.
The evening was just as painful as I knew it would be with James's eyes always drifting over me with the glint I hated. With every look Caleb tensed and his mother drank. I couldn’t believe the woman had any liver left, she was drinking so much.
Finally, after dessert I couldn’t do it anymore and faked a yawn. “I’m sorry, but it has been a busy day of studying. I had quite a lot to make up for.”
“Of course,” Caleb stood up, extending his hand to me. “Let me walk you back.”
“That’s what happens when we run away like a petulant child,” Jacklyn snorted into her glass.
“That’s enough!” James bellowed. Slamming his fist on the table, he caused his crystal wine glass to fall on the floor and shatter into a hundred pieces.
“What?” She threw him a matching glare, her own glass still secured in her hand. “Are we going to pretend it didn’t happen? That she belongs?” She looked me in the eyes. “This girl doesn’t belong in this house, in our lives, in Stonewood.”
“She belongs more than you do, Jacklyn. Remember where you came from. She has founder blood in her; you don’t. Just…just be careful.”
I hated that he was threatening her because of me. I didn’t want to be the reason for any fight between them.
“Please don’t. It’s okay. She is right to be upset. I did break the trust when I left. There is nothing she can say that I don't deserve.” Actually, I didn’t deserve any of it, but it didn't bother me. I really didn’t care what the senior Astors thought of me.
“You never broke my trust; you didn’t have it in the first place,” she cackled before taking a long swig of her drink. “I’m not an idiot driven by the Astor hormones for whom your genes seem to be kryptonite.”
“Mother–” Caleb sighed with weariness before turning toward me. “Let me walk you back.”
“Oh, and Caleb,” James interjected, “please make sure to come back right after. I will be waiting for you in my office. I need to talk to you.”
I winced at the barely veiled threat of his tone and couldn’t help but worry about Caleb, unsure what his father was going to do to him.
“Thank you for the meal,” I said to James with a small smile, hoping to pacify his anger toward Caleb.
He smiled at me, the threat in his eyes dimming slightly. “It was a true pleasure, Esmeralda dear. I’ll see you real soon.”
I nodded, hating the sound of that promise.
“I’m sorry,” I told Caleb as soon as we were out of earshot.
His steps faltered with surprise. “What are you apologizing for?”
For the parents you have, for the love you never got, for walking away and betraying you when I didn’t think you’d care, for crushing the little trust you managed to give me, for not showing you that you were worth fighting for… Take your pick I thought. But all I could do was shrug and say, “I don’t know.”
His face softened as
if he could read all of this on mine. His grip on my hand relaxed as his thumb started to gently rub the side of my hand up and down without him realizing it.
“Don’t apologize. She was using you as an excuse to start a war. We never have family dinners. They always turn ugly. This is not on you.”
“And it shouldn’t be on you either,” I replied as we stopped in front of my room.
He gave me a sad smile. “Yeah, well, you understand better than anyone that sometimes life deals you a hand that is not what you would have picked for yourself.”
Without even thinking, I raised my free hand and cupped his cheek. I wasn’t sure why I attempted to show him this tenderness, this comfort. He hadn’t done anything to warrant it. Yet, I needed to comfort him more than I needed my next breath. And he accepted it, even if for just a few seconds. He leaned into my touch and closed his eyes. It barely lasted though. He caught himself almost immediately, then straightened up and let go of my hand as if I’d hurt him.
“Don’t, Esmeralda. Don’t…ever. Not again.” He turned around and walked away without another word.
I stood in the corridor for quite some time after his departure. I was surprised by both my need to protect and heal him, as well as the deep response to my comfort, dare I even say the plenitude, that had settled on his face under my touch.
“There might be hope for you yet, Caleb Astor. There might be hope for you after all,” I whispered before stepping into my room and locking the door behind me.
Chapter 11 - Caleb
“So, I think that today we need to discuss the subject of the Prom,” Archibald said as he opened the council book.
I rested my forehead on the table. “No.”
“No? What do you mean, no?”
I looked up. “I just don’t care at all, not even a little.” And especially not after what my father had said to me the other night after dinner. How he intended for us to share my bride, whether I wanted us to or not. But I would kill him before I let him touch her.
Hell, I’d kill anyone who thought they had rights to her. I might have promised her I’d let her go, but it was still very hard for me not to think of her as mine. I couldn’t do that until I knew what they hid from me, until I knew what they were facing together. I hadn’t really cared about the pathetic little secret club until what had happened in the swimming pool because if Esmeralda had spoken the truth, which I still wasn’t sure she had, then somebody had tried to kill her, and that was not something I wanted to be kept away from. I wanted to find the culprit and burn him to the ground.
Archibald sighed, resting his hand on the book. “Why do you always have to make things so difficult, Astor? This is trivial and yet essential in school life. You wanted the chair at the council. You have it–”
“There are matters which are much more important.” I was done playing the idiot.
“Yeah?” Archibald arched an eyebrow mockingly.
I tightened my hands into fists, pushing down my strong desire to smash his face into the table.
“Yeah, like maybe what is happening with Esmeralda and why you’re all meeting like little spies behind my back.”
I looked at Antoine who had the decency to look down in shame. I'd always considered him as being my friend - my only friend, even if the word didn’t really mean much in this world.
As for Archibald and I… Ah, Archibald and I, there was way too much bad blood between us. Too many things had happened while fighting for a crown I was not sure was worth anything anymore.
As for the incident with Taylor, well, I wasn't sure I was really to blame in that. He had made his choice, burning any feelings that might have existed. I'd barely handed him the matches. The consequences were all his.
I cocked my head to the side, thinking for the first time about what I would have done if it had been Esmeralda and I.
Archibald closed the book. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
I let out a humorless laugh. “Do you really think you can fool me? I’m the puppet master, remember?”
He shook his head.
“Please,” I snorted. “You can deny it all you like. You think you’re an evil mastermind, but your little gang is far from being smooth.”
I pointed to Antoine who was still avoiding my eyes. “You could at least pretend to teach her some French. Either you’re the worst tutor in history or you are not teaching her shit because fuck, she blows at French.”
“I– It’s…” He opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water.
I raised my hand. “Don’t embarrass yourself and insult me by trying to lie, just keep it closed. And if you don't tell me, I swear I’ll burn the fucking world until I find out the secrets you’re keeping.”
“You should be careful, Caleb.” Archibald crossed his arms on his chest. “If you burn the world, you might burn with it.”
“And I care because…” I trailed off. I didn't think Archibald really understood the depth of my detachment. Nobody was more dangerous than someone who had nothing left to lose.
“Little lesson, Archibald – to destroy your enemy, you need to be ready to be destroyed.” And I was born ready. I even thought that part of me had been chipping away since the day I was born.
Archibald turned to Antoine who shook his head ever so slightly.
Archibald sighed. “To be fair, Caleb, whatever is happening, if anything is happening, it has nothing to do with you.” He shook his head. “And if you want to know, you’ll need to speak with your fiancée.”
“Ah yes,” I snorted. “My fiancée, your sister…” I turned to Antoine. “Your little secret-keeper.”
Antoine paled, realizing I knew more than he wanted me to.
“As you know, your sister has not been forthcoming. She’d rather drown than be with me, so I think that–”
“SHE DIDN’T TRY TO KILL HERSELF!” Archibald snapped, his face reflecting the frustration I felt.
This was a waste of time. They would not come clean. I needed to find out what they were hiding using other methods. Even though it was four against one, they wouldn't stand a chance against me.
I stood up, grabbing my bag. “I’m done with this shit. Meeting adjourned. I’ll see you when you decide to stop being backstabbing whores and return to being the powerful kings you used to be.”
I smirked. “Now I’ll go find Aleksandra and ease my frustration. I’ll see you for lunch. It might very well take all of the morning classes.”
Archibald's face darkened with anger at the idea of me cheating on his sister. If only he knew the truth and the curse that had affected my dick since I'd taken Esmeralda’s virginity.
I also knew that it was my only possible excuse as the bitch was not going to be in school for a few days. She had been texting me nonstop since I'd left her place the night Esmeralda had nearly drowned. She was now on her way to an upscale clinic to get some work done as if she thought it would entice me. Even with or without the Esmeralda curse, she had another thing coming. Had I ever wanted to fuck plastic, I would have ordered a doll. At least then I wouldn’t have to pretend to listen to all her crap as I pumped into her.
After exiting the room, I waited behind the lockers for the meeting to be over. Archibald and Antoine didn’t have any reason to feel suspicious. But no matter what I felt beyond pathetic following Archibald Forbes like a fucking groupie in heat. How could the tables have turned? I used to be the king, on top, untouchable, and enjoying how it felt above it all. Now I was left behind playing I-Spy to get some scrap of information. Oh, if my father could see me…
Archibald exited and walked into another empty classroom where he took out his phone.
I leaned beside the door, opening it slightly to listen. We still had the minutes before the changing of classes.
“Hey, don’t worry. Everything is okay. Yes, Caleb is fine too. Why do you even care?” Archibald snapped and I couldn't help but smile a little. Esmeralda's concern over me was not completely fake a
nd that made me feel better.
“Oh, come on. It’s only homeroom… So what?” He sighed. “You're Forbes. Nobody cares if you miss the end of class. Esme. Esme...ESME! Fuck, just listen.”
Now I chuckled out loud. I'd found Archibald’s master - his sister. Pot, meet kettle, a little vicious taunting voice resonated in the back of my mind, sobering me fast.
“You need to talk to him. Tell him. No, I have not lost my mind, but Esme, I think you can trust him. Tell him something, anything. Ease his mind. Make him understand you didn't try to kill yourself. Please, for me.”
I was frozen on the spot, my head against the door, not even pretending to be just standing there. Archibald Forbes was pleading my case. Of all the people in the world, he would never have been my pick.
“No, not only for that. I would feel better if he knew something. You would be safer at his place. He cares, Esme. No matter how much he denies it to you, to me, to himself. He cares...deeply.”
I cursed under my breath and walked away, deciding to spy another day. How was it that he saw so clearly into me when I always thought I was a mystery?
I did care, and I hated it. I hated it even more now that I knew the world had figured it out. Did my father know? The thought chilled me to the bone. If he did, it would be the end of everything. He would have leverage again, a leverage he'd lost when Theo had died.
I didn’t even pretend to be out with Aleks, choosing instead to walk to my next class when the bell rang.
“So what about Aleks?” Archibald asked as we walked in.
“Not here today,” I admitted. Just as I sat at my desk, my phone vibrated in my pocket.
Can you meet me by your car at lunch? I need to talk to you.
I looked at Esmeralda’s text, cursing myself as my heartrate picked up just at the reception of a message. It was the first one she had ever sent me. I felt like a child as both apprehension and a certain feeling of treacherous hope settled its painful claws into my heart.
