by R. G. Angel
“Are you leaving already?”
“Yes. Coming here was already quite risky, but when Ben told me he was meeting with you I wanted to check on you in person just to make sure that what you said on the phone was correct. That you were well. You’re my baby girl. The fact that you’re eighteen and obviously well protected -” he pointed to Archie - “still won’t stop me from worrying.”
I nodded, thanking God that I didn't tell him I’d moved in with Caleb and that we strongly suspected someone had tried to kill me.
“Everything’s fine, Dad.”
He nodded again, taking off his cap. He ran his hand through his hair before putting it back on. It was something he did when he was nervous.
“What is it?”
“You know what you’re doing with Ben for your mom?”
“Ben’s not in danger,”
He sighed. “No, I know that, but I hope you both know how dangerous the path you’re taking is.”
I felt Archie turn to stone beside me and I knew he was about to lash out.
“No offense, sir, but I think I know this life a little bit more than you do. I’m not saying it is without danger, but I’ll protect Esmeralda with my own life if I need to. You, on the other hand, were not even able to protect her from your own weaknesses.”
Luke looked down in shame as I elbowed Archie as hard as I could in the stomach.
“What was that for?” he asked breathlessly, rubbing the spot.
“Because you’re being an ass and I don’t like this version of you.” I stepped away from his embrace and went to stand in front of Luke, taking his hand in mine.
“You did a great job with me, Dad. Look what I turned out to be.” I smiled at him as he still avoided my eyes. “William has tried everything to break me, but he failed. I’m strong and smart and all that is because of you. Don’t listen to Archie. He is angry. You did a great job and I love you so very much.”
Luke finally looked at me, his eyes shining with tears. “I’m so proud of you, my girl. I’ll see you soon, okay?”
“Of course.”
He nodded toward Archie. “Archibald, take good care of our girl.”
Archie nodded back. “Always.”
Luke gave me another quick kiss on the top of my head before leaving.
Once the door closed quietly behind Luke, I turned around ready to give Archie an earful for his rudeness, but the sad look on his face stopped me in my tracks.
“He has mom’s eyes,” he whispered, his eyes on the door.
I nodded. “Yes, he does.”
He finally looked down at me. “You look just like her, but those eyes…” He shook his head. “I didn’t expect to ever see them again.”
This drained the last of my frustration away and I gave him a hug. “I know and I’m sorry.”
He sighed, wrapping me in his arms and resting his cheek on top of my head. “At least I have you, and knowing you want to come with me to Providence…it’s the best news ever.”
I nodded in his embrace. “Well, we better go back now.”
“Yeah, let's get this over with.”
“Is everything okay?” Taylor asked, taking in the look on both of our faces.
I nodded before looking at Ben with a small smile on my face. “Yes, Ben brought Luke. Thank you so much.”
Ben put down the little round plastic thing he was holding and gave me a smile. “You’re welcome, Esme. I’m pleased I could do that for you.”
“How is it going?” Archie asked Antoine, clearly eager to leave.
Okay… He really wanted to get it over with.
Antoine started to pack his bag up. “We’re done actually. It’s quite straightforward and the boy is smart enough.”
I looked at Ben. “You’re good.”
“Yes, but it’s unbelievable, all of this. I feel like I'm in some spy movie. It's crazy.” He shook his head.
“Yeah, like you’re James Bond and he is Q?” Archie asked with a little teasing smile.
“Yes exactly!” Ben exclaimed. “You’re Q.”
Antoine glared at Archie. “Vas te faire foutre, Forbes.”
Ben gave me a clueless look and I was pleased for once that I was not the only one who didn't speak French.
“He said ‘Fuck you, Forbes’.” Taylor piped in, way too happy to assist.
I rolled my eyes. “It’s amazing all the tech, right?” I commented, trying to redirect the conversation.
“Yeah, it's like in the films!” He showed me a small round see-through sticker. “Can you believe this is a listening device?! Just stick it on his phone and bang! We hear it all.” He looked at it with amazement. “I feel like we’re in Gattaca or some shit.”
Antoine nodded. “Most of what I’ve given you today is priceless, created for the highest level of our– your intelligence. These are not toys.”
God, was he serious when he talked about his spy stuff.
Ben nodded. “Yeah, got it. It’s easy. There won’t be a problem.”
“Do you have any other questions?” Archie asked, looking at his watch. “We really appreciate everything you're doing for us, but we won’t be able to stay much longer.”
“No, no questions, and I'm not doing it for you. I’m doing it for Esme,” he added, keeping his eyes on me, the heat in them unmissable.
“Uh huh…” Archie's eyes narrowed into slits. “That’s nice.” His tone was so cold I shivered.
“Okay guys, why don’t you wait for me out front? I’ll walk Ben back to his bike,” I offered before Archie could say something mean yet again. “You don’t mind, do you?” I asked Ben.
“No. Actually, I’d like to talk to you alone too.”
“Okay.” I took a step forward. “Let’s go.”
Archie caught my wrist. “Esme, maybe I should come with you. It’s not like–”
“No, don’t, Archie, please. Don't be like Caleb or Father. Don’t try to control me. Not you.”
He let go of my wrist as if I’d burned him. I knew it hurt him to be compared to them, most of all our father.
“Esme, no, never.”
“And yet–” I pointed at Ben who was waiting by the door, the little bag of spying devices secured in his hand. “He is my friend, someone who has always been there for me. I’m just going in the back for a few minutes to have some alone time with my friend. This is not something you should consider as an issue. Archie, don’t smother me. I wouldn’t survive it.”
He looked pained and took a step back. “Never. We’ll wait out front. I love you.”
I smiled back. I knew how much it cost him to say those words, especially in public. “I love you too.”
Ben and I walked outside, remaining silent until we reached his bike.
“Your friends are...interesting.”
I laughed. “That’s one way of putting it.”
He leaned against his bike.
“You know, you don't have to do it if you don't want to,” I said. “It can be dangerous and New York’s not close.”
“What are you saying? Don’t you think I can do it?”
“No!” I shook my head. “Of course you can. But I feel guilty, you know? I keep putting people in danger with this.”
He raised his hand to stop me. “If your mother was murdered and I didn’t help you out, I wouldn’t be able to look at myself in the mirror. Plus, as I said, I was going to New York next week anyway.”
“You were? Why?”
Ben blushed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’ve been contacted by NYU. They are offering a full ride.”
“Oh! Oh my God, Ben, this is big!” I threw myself at him to hug him. I was lucky he was so big as I almost took him and the bike down with me.
He chuckled. “Wow, that’s an enthusiasm I missed.”
I tried to pull away, but I realized my mistake as his arms stayed wrapped around me, his eyes detailing my face before lingering on my lips.
“I truly missed you, Esme. I missed everything we
did together and all our missed opportunities,” he added before leaning down.
I turned my head at the last second, his lips connecting with my cheek. I wiggled out of his hold.
“I’m sorry!” He straightened up visibly embarrassed. “I just thought–” He shook his head. “The fiancé wasn’t with you. I thought–”
“No, Ben, don't apologize. My situation is complicated and I don't want you to think either way. I don’t know where I stand right now. I don’t want to make any promises I can't keep.”
“Please, Esme, don’t. You didn’t promise me anything. It was just me being…” He sighed. “I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“I–” I bit my lip. “Your help’s not in the view of–”
He growled. “Fuck, I really made a mess of things, didn’t I? No, it has nothing to do with my feelings for you. As I said, you’re my friend and that’s the right thing to do. Your friend Antoine gave me a burner and his number. I’ll text him when it’s done.”
“Thank you, Ben, and thank you for bringing my dad. It meant much more than you think.”
He nodded, straddling his bike. “It’s alright, Esme. I’m happy to help. Oh, and when things get less complicated, give me a call. I’ll be waiting.”
I smiled. “Okay,” I replied, but all I could think about was Caleb and that didn’t predict anything good.
When I walked back into the backroom, only Archie was waiting for me.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I think so. Where did the crazy kids go?”
Archie rolled his eyes. “Taylor’s buying half the store. She wants to thank the girl for loaning the space.”
“I can understand that. Let's buy some stuff too.”
Eighteen hundred dollars later, we were on our way back to the car, weighed down by bags.
“Did you really need ten crochet blankets?” Antoine asked Taylor as he set the bags in the trunk.
Taylor shrugged. “They’re great presents. They were pretty and kitsch and shut up.”
The drive back was done in silence, but it was not tense as it’d been on the way to Port Harbor. We were all lost in our thoughts, me mostly thinking of Luke, Ben’s attempt at a kiss, and the stupid present I’d bought Caleb.
Thinking of Caleb, I decided to text him that we were on our way back. As usual, his answer was one word – ‘fine’. But then he was waiting for me by the main door as Archie pulled up in front of the house.
“Be safe,” Archie whispered kissing my forehead, his eyes never wavering from Caleb’s.
“Always,” I replied exiting the car and meeting Caleb by the stairs.
“How was Port Harbor?”
“Bittersweet,” I admitted. It was true for so many reasons, including us and the realization that the girl I had been was gone for good, that I could not long for a life that was not mine anymore. I was not Esme Danvers anymore, but I was not exactly Esmeralda Forbes either. I wasn’t sure who I was.
His face softened a bit and he trailed his knuckles ever so slightly against the back of my hand. “I have some good news for you.”
“Yeah? What is it?”
“My father has been called away on business. He is leaving tomorrow for a week.”
I smiled, relief going through me. “Is your mom going too?”
Caleb chuckled at the hope in my voice. “I said good news, not great news.”
“Ah.” I shrugged. “I’ll take what I can get.”
He nodded toward my shopping bags. “You did some shopping.”
“I didn’t use the card.”
“Okay?” He seemed to be taken aback by the statement. “Why not?”
“Archie wanted to buy everything. Even something he didn't realize was a present for you so, you know…” I gave him a little mischievous smile. “That will be something to tease him about.”
“A present? For me?” he asked again, still staring at the bags. Did he even get any presents? This man was breaking me.
I nodded. “Come to my room. I’ll give it to you.”
His eyes darkened a little and I blushed under the implication of my own words. Shaking my head, I started up the stairs with a silent Caleb trailing behind me.
As soon as we walked in, I started rummaging through my bags for the small box. I found it and wrapped my hand around it, suddenly second-guessing my impulse to buy him them; it was ridiculous.
“Don’t give yourself a brain aneurysm, Esmeralda, just give me the box.” The cool detachment of his voice didn't match the heat of excitement in his eyes as he stared at the box.
“I– umm… yeah.” I fidgeted. “Here.” I gave him the box.
He looked down at it and opened it carefully like it was precious.
“So, yeah, it’s not much and I didn’t pay with your card, but I know you love cufflinks. I’ve seen them in your bedroom. I mean, I know they are not the same quality and all, but–”
“Can you just stop rambling for a minute?” he asked calmly.
“I–” I took a deep breath. “Yeah.”
He chuckled. “The rambling when you’re nervous is quite endearing, but it makes it difficult to say anything.”
Had he said ‘endearing’? I cocked my head to the side. Things had gotten better between us since the incident, but we were still a way off niceties, especially when it was only the two of us.
“Do you like them?”
He shook his head. “No.”
I couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed, even if I should have expected that much. Wings were tacky and they didn't have the same significance for him that they had for me.
“It’s okay. I can–”
“I love them”
“You what?”
He gave me a small smile. “I love them, really.” He took another couple of steps forward.
“You do?” I asked, arching my eyebrows with surprise.
His smile widened. “Uh huh.” He leaned down, slowly, and brushed his lips against mine, making me shiver.
I took a sharp breath. Without thinking, I stood on my tiptoes and pressed my lips a bit more firmly against his.
He wrapped his arm around my waist and gave me a few slow open-mouth kisses.
It was like time had stopped. His lips remained on mine. He pulled me closer to him. The flutter in my chest intensified. My heart pounded in my chest and my knees got weaker. Everything disappeared except the heat of his skin on mine, the smell of his cologne as it addictively invaded my senses.
When he broke the kiss, he kept me in his arms. I looked at him, my body tingling, my lips parted. His blue eyes were so full of turmoil, looking right into me and filling me with a wave of warmth that engulfed me completely. It curled my toes, unfurled all of my senses, as his closeness managed to silence all my thoughts.
He pulled me in again, claiming my mouth, hungrily and intensely until my knees gave in and only his arms kept me up.
He broke the kiss, leaving both of us breathless, but he kept his arms around me until I could feel my legs once more. Again, I was grateful.
He finally let me go, walking backward to the door. “Goodnight, Esmeralda.” His voice was a bit deeper than usual.
“Goodnight,” I squeaked as he left the room
Yeah, right, like I’ll be able to sleep after that.
Chapter 13 – Esme
When I pulled into the school parking lot this morning, I was feeling lighter than I had since I’d come back from California. Maybe it was because we were finally making some progress on solving my mother’s murder or maybe it was because my relationship with Caleb had shifted some more. The hate and anger had been replaced by some connivance and a light, dare I say ‘friendship’. With his father gone and his mother holed up in her quarters, the house had become ours again. We dined together, even read last night in the library in a companionable silence. I even started to hope that–
A knock on my car window made me jump. I was about to bitch at whoever had scared me
when I noticed the grim look on my brother’s face.
“What’s happened?” I asked, opening the door. Couldn’t I just catch a break?!
“Father’s summoning you and Caleb for dinner tomorrow night.”
I frowned. There was no lost love between my evil father and myself. I hadn’t heard from him since I came back and I’d only shared a couple of calls with poor Sophia.
“Why? The man has not talked to me in weeks.”
“I don’t know.”
I sighed. “Did you tell Caleb?”
He nodded. “Yes, but Father had already called him to inform him of the request.”
“And what did he say?”
Archie shrugged. “He said he’ll do what you want to do.”
I smiled at that. Yes, Caleb had changed since I’d given him the cufflinks. Who would have thought they would make such a difference?
“You two…” Archie trailed off.
“Yes?
“Are you…a thing?” He asked with a grimace.
“Don’t look so disgusted. It’s offensive, and no, we’re not a ‘thing’.”
Our phones beeped at the same time. I looked up and saw Caleb and Antoine reach for theirs too – that didn’t bode anything good.
Meet me in the council room. I’ve got news. T
“Oppenheimer texting me willingly? It has to be life-altering,” Archie joked, but I could see he meant it.
“What do you think she wants?” Antoine asked as we met by the council room door.
Archie unlocked it and gestured us in. “I don’t know, man. She’s your girlfriend. You tell me.”
Caleb looked at me and rolled his eyes. We exchanged a grin; this still-fragile friendship felt nice.
“So did Archie tell you about dinner with your father?” he whispered, coming to stand closer to me than necessary, but I was not going to complain. I shamefully had to admit I was somehow addicted to the earthy smell of his cologne.
“He just did, before Taylor’s summons.”
“How are you feeling about it?”
I looked at his face. The concern was genuine, opening the breach in my heart a bit more, letting more of him slip in. “I want to know what he wants, and I’ll have you and Archie at my back.”
