by E K Ballard
“Tell me, do they have fantasy football majors in the colleges you can’t even bother to apply to?” Kristin asked sarcastically.
Jamie looked like she had been slapped. John and Angela remained by the door, listening to Kristin.
“Look, you may be satisfied in life flipping burgers for a living, but not me.” Kristin started to gather her books and put them in her bag. “I’ll email Mr. Starke and let him know I’m going to do this project by myself, or he needs to get me a different group. I can’t work like this.”
“Jamie, do you still need to have something read for this project?” asked John.
“Yes.”
“Then get your ass upstairs and get it done. I better not find you checking your fantasy team, either.”
Jamie stood up. “Are you going to leave?” she asked Kristin, seeing that her bag was packed.
“I don’t know. I need to get my work done.” Kristin was visibly upset. “I need to be able to get on the internet.”
“Please stay,” said Angela. “You can work here. I’ll get you the password for the Wi-Fi.”
“Fine, I’ll stay,” Kristin decided.
Jamie was relieved Kristin was staying. She gathered up her books and said, “Come on,” as she led Kristin up to her bedroom.
Kristin followed Jamie up a flight of stairs to Jamie’s room, where Jamie flopped down face first on her bed with Death of a Salesman in her hand.
Jamie’s room was above the garage and had two separate entrances. Trophies, pictures, and sports memorabilia adorned the walls and shelves. A set of weights was at the far end of the room by various pieces of exercise equipment. There was a large, flat screen television set mounted to the wall across from the queen-sized bed.
Kristin pulled out her computer and started doing research for AP US History. She looked over at Jamie and saw she didn’t have the book open.
“Why aren’t you reading?” she demanded.
“Because I hate to read,” Jamie said defiantly. “What do you care? You’re telling Starke that you’re going to work alone, anyway. So, go ahead, you won’t be the first person who wanted out of a group with me.”
“What is wrong with you? Just open the book and read!” Kristin said.
“Just open the book and read!” mimicked Jamie. “It’s not like that. I’m not good at reading, okay? I’m sorry you got put with the stupidest kid in the class.”
“Stop making excuses and read!” Kristin said.
“Don’t you think if I could just pick up a book and read it I would? You don’t get it. I hate reading!”
“Jamie—”
“What? Sorry I can’t live up to you and your gifted standards.”
“You don’t have to be gifted to read Arthur Miller!”
“It doesn’t matter, anyway. You’ll get another partner, and I’ll work by myself because no one wants to be in a group with me because I’m so stupid.”
“Why do you say you’re stupid when you won’t even try?”
“I’m barely keeping my eligibility up for soccer.”
“Just start with reading the play.”
“You aren’t getting it. I hate to read, and I don’t want to read this stupid play!”
Kristen was exasperated. “Come on, Jamie. Do you want me to read it to you?”
“Yes.”
“What?” Kristin was surprised with Jamie’s answer.
“Yes,” Jamie repeated. “I want you to read it to me.”
Kristin saw Jamie was serious. “Fine. If that’s what it’s going to take. Open it up and follow along.”
Kristin turned to the beginning and started reading out loud. Jamie picked up her copy and appeared to be following along. Kristin read every word, including the stage directions, and after ten minutes, she stopped.
“Are you with me?” she asked Jamie, whose long body was laying across the bed on her stomach, looking at the book.
“Uh-huh.”
Kristin continued to read. “What do you think of Willy Loman?” She stopped to ask Jamie.
“He’s losing his mind.”
“Why do you say that?”
“He’s talking to himself. One minute he’s saying Biff is lazy, and the next he’s saying that the one thing Biff isn’t, is lazy.”
Kristin read on. When she finished Act I, she drank the rest of her glass of water.
“Why don’t you read one of the parts?”
“No,” said Jamie firmly.
Kristin started Act II. After two and a half hours, the play was done. Kristin’s voice was tired.
Jamie shut the book and said, “That wasn’t bad. I wish he hadn’t committed suicide, though. Happy was the only one who even cared about him.”
“Well, why did he commit suicide?” Kristin asked.
“I know he did it for the insurance money for Biff, but still, they knew he was trying to do that, why didn’t they get him help?” Jamie lay on her back in her bed and stared off in thought.
“I pulled up the Wikipedia page on Arthur Miller and Death of a Salesman. I want you to read it over just so you can get some background information on the play and the playwright.” Jamie sat down at her desk and read Kristin’s computer screen.
“When was it written?” asked Kristin.
“It says 1949,” said Jamie
“When does it take place?”
“The late 1940’s.”
“What do we know about what was going on in the United States, and the world, in the 1940’s?”
“Um, wasn’t there a war?” Jamie asked.
“Yes. A little skirmish called World War II, which ended in 1945. What happened when all the US servicemen and women returned home?”
Getting no response, Kristin continued.
“They came home from the war and went to college on the GI bill. They gave birth to the baby boomer generation, built and bought houses, and they made things. It was a very prosperous time in the United States.”
“But Willy Loman wasn’t.”
“Correct. Start thinking about the term ‘American Dream’ and how it relates to the play.” Kristin changed the subject. “Are you behind in any other classes?”
“All of them.”
“What else do you take?”
“Algebra II, Economics, Physics, and Spanish II.”
“Get your books out. I need to get some more water.” She went downstairs and found Angela making dinner with John in the kitchen.
“Is she reading?” John asked.
“She finished it,” Kristin replied. She filled her glass up with water from the tap.
“We heard what you said to Jamie earlier,” said John.
“I was a little harsh, I know. I am going to apologize to her.”
“No, that’s not where I was going. She needed to hear that from someone other than me or her mother. I wanted to thank you for getting her moving.” John sighed. “She makes us want to pull our hair out.”
“I hope you’ll stay for dinner,” said Angela. “We’re having spaghetti and meatballs.”
“Uh, sure, thanks. I’ll need to let my dad know.” She texted her father to let him know she would be eating with Jamie’s family and that it would probably be a late night.
Kristin returned upstairs and sat next to Jamie on her bed. “Let me see your Algebra.”
Jamie took out her book, and she and Kristin worked their way back to the spot where Jamie last understood the work. Jamie had a pretty good grasp of math, so it didn’t take her long to get caught up. Spanish was tougher, but Jamie was starting to get the hang of the conjugations of the various verbs.
Kristin went over to Jamie’s desk and saw the computer screen was open to the University of New Hampshire website. “Is this your application?” she asked.
“Yeah. I have to write an essay and do some short responses. I don’t know why I even bother. It’s a waste of time. I won’t get in.”
“Why do you say that? Why are you so negative?” Kristin asked, lo
oking at the application.
“My grades suck, and my SAT scores aren’t high enough to get in.”
“What do you want to go to school for?”
“Good question.”
“I mean, what do you want to major in? What do you want to do with your life?”
“I don’t know. Not go to school.”
“The essay wants you to describe an achievement or accomplishment. What are you going to write about?”
“I don’t know. I might be the first girl to get the Twelve Letter Award.”
“What’s that?”
“It’s for getting a varsity letter every season for all four years of high school.”
“And you’d be the first girl at Stowe, ever, to get it?”
“Yeah.”
“For what sports?”
“Soccer, basketball, and softball.”
“Do you have any games that stand out for any reason?”
“Well, when I was a freshman, I scored three goals in the state championship soccer game.”
“Really? That’s a big deal.”
“I guess.”
“Anything else?”
“I have been a team captain as a junior for soccer and softball, and have been the team MVP in all three sports since sophomore year.”
“Okay, I get the picture. Keep working on your Spanish.” Kristin turned to Jamie’s computer and started typing.
An hour later, Angela called up to them, “Girls? Are you hungry for dinner yet?”
“Yes,” Jamie answered.
Kristin leaned back from the desk. “Okay, I have your essay written and the application is ready to submit. I saved the essay in a word document on your desktop so you can copy and paste from it if you want to use it for other applications.”
“You did? Really?” The relief and gratitude in Jamie’s voice were unmistakable.
“You should look it over first and make any changes you want. It’s really pretty basic, but it fits what they want.”
Jamie looked over Kristin’s shoulder and read what Kristin had written. “Wow. That’s really good. Thanks.” Jamie stared at Kristin with awe in her eyes. “It’s like you’re me or something.”
“You’re welcome. Let’s go eat.”
Kristin went down with Jamie and saw a place had been set for her. She sat down, and they put a generous portion of spaghetti and meatballs on her plate. “Here, have some bread and salad,” said Jamie as she passed them to Kristin.
“You’ve been up there for about six and a half hours,” said John. “Did you get anything done?”
“Yeah. A lot,” said Jamie.
“Like what?” he persisted.
“The play is read, Algebra is done, Spanish is done, and Economics is almost done. I just have some Physics to do.”
John looked at Kristin. “How much did she actually do?”
“All of it,” she answered.
“When are you going to get to your applications?”
”UNH is finished.”
“Really?” John was surprised. “Did you just slap something together, or did you actually spend some time on it?”
“I looked it over,” Kristin answered. “It looks pretty solid.”
“Why do you make it so hard on yourself, Jamie? I just don’t get it.” John said. When Jamie didn’t respond, he looked to Kristin for an explanation.
“I think it’s a lack in confidence. I saw you getting it, just maybe not the first time. Then you get frustrated, say you’re stupid and can’t do it, and quit,” Kristin said.
“Huh,” said John.
After dinner, Kristin was able to get her work done while Jamie did her physics with a little help from Kristin. When she was done, she got up to examine the pictures hanging on the wall.
“Who are these people?” Kristin asked.
“My brothers, Jason and Jack.”
“Your whole family is really tall,” Kristin said. Two handsome and confident men stood next to snowmobiles with Jamie’s father. The three men all had dirty blonde hair and hulking frames that made the snowmobiles look small.
“Is that you?” Kristin asked, pointing to a picture of Jamie’s softball team.
“Yeah.”
“Your hair is so short,” Kristin commented. “You look like a boy.”
Jamie bristled. She hated being compared to a boy.
“I get my hair cut short every year before softball starts,” said Jamie defensively.
“Oh. Well. It looks better longer,” Kristin said matter-of-factly.
Jamie thought she might not ever get her hair cut again.
“I should get going,” Kristin said.
“You want me to take you home?” Jamie asked.
“No, my dad said he’d come get me.”
“Kristin?” Jamie asked. “Why did you do all this for me? I mean, you didn’t have to.”
Kristin gave Jamie a quick smile. “The principal at my old school would always tell us, ‘to those whom much is given, much is expected.’ It was the school philosophy that there is a social responsibility to being gifted. We were expected to share our gifts.”
“Well, thanks. A lot.”
“Ask for help before you get this far behind again,” Kristin said. “And you’re not stupid. I don’t know why you think you are, but when you tell yourself that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.”
Jamie was moved by what Kristin said. She knew people thought she was just a dumb jock. No one ever said anything positive about her intelligence.
“Thanks.”
When Rob came to pick up Kristin, Jamie walked outside with her. Rob rolled the window down, and Jamie introduced herself.
“Thanks, Mr. Olson, for letting Kristin come over today. I could have given her a ride home.”
Rob looked at Jamie’s Jeep. “Is that yours?”
“Yeah.”
“Nice.”
“Thanks. See you,” Jamie said to Kristin.
“Yeah, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
* * *
“Did you get all your work done?” Rob asked Kristin as they drove home.
“Yeah. I helped Jamie get caught up a little, too.”
“That was nice. How was church?”
“It was awful! The pastor, Rich, is some old guy who put his hand on my shoulder, and it was so pervy. Then he asked me if I would work in the kids’ room on Sundays for like, $6 an hour. That’s not even minimum wage!”
“What did you tell him?”
“I said I’d have to ask you. Please say you won’t let me! That church is weird. You have to go to see for yourself.”
“I almost don’t need to, it’s all your mother has talked about since I got home.”
“Please come up with an excuse why I can’t babysit.”
“I’ll tell them you go to church to hear the message, how’s that?”
“Thanks, Dad.”
Chapter Fifteen
Jamie vacillated between going to the library during 8th period to study with Kristin and finding somewhere else to go. She didn’t know if Kristin would mind, but she did tell Jamie to ask for help before she got behind. What if she said something stupid? It always took Jamie about five minutes of being around Kristin before her nerves settled down.
She walked around the hallway that led to the library and started to go in once, and stopped herself. Finally, she mustered up the courage to walk in. Kristin was nowhere in sight. Jamie looked in some of the rooms, but she wasn’t in any. She walked up and down the aisles, and found Kristin in the back corner of the library, seated alone at a small table. She took a few deep breaths and went over to Kristin.
“Hi,” said Jamie. Kristin looked up and smiled.
“Hi.”
“Could I, I mean, would it be okay if I studied here with you?” Jamie asked.
“Sure,” said Kristin. “Pull up a chair and make yourself comfortable.”
“Thanks,” said Jamie. She sat down and pulled out her algebra textbook
and started doing her homework. The hand holding her pencil was shaking a little. She didn’t notice Kristin was looking at what she wrote.
“Why are you doing it that way?” Kristin asked her.
“That’s how we were told to do it.”
“You’re adding an extra step that is unnecessary and confusing. Try it this way.” Kristin showed her, and Jamie tried it. That was easier. She did the rest of the problems the way Kristin showed her, and then she went back and redid the first ones she had done.
When the final bell rang, Jamie put her books back in her pack and got ready to leave for practice. Kristin stayed at the table.
“Aren’t you going home?” asked Jamie.
“No, I meet my brother here and we study until they close.”
“Oh.”
“Yup. If we still have more work to do after they close, we go to the town library.”
Jamie didn’t get it. “Why don’t you just do your work at home?” she asked.
“We just like using the libraries,” Kristin said, her face turning red.
“Well, I’ll see you tomorrow in Lit,” Jamie said.
Kristin watched Jamie walk away and noticed how well Jamie’s jeans fit her body. Snug in the behind, but tapering down Jamie’s long legs, they accentuated her thin but muscular frame.
* * *
That week, Jamie went to the library every day during 8th period and sat with Kristin and studied. If she ever got stuck, Kristin would patiently explain how it was done. It was nice to feel like she wasn’t behind in her classes, and she got back a test in Algebra that had 88 written on the top with a smiley face. She got an 84 on an Economics paper, and she got a 78 on her English quiz.
“I’m sorry,” she said to Kristin. “I really tried to do well on this. I know this means a lot to you, getting A’s and all. I should have gotten a better grade. I am not a good writer, and he took off a lot of points for spelling and punctuation.”
Kristin surprised her by giving Jamie a small pat on her arm. “If you did your best, that’s all I can ask for. It’s still a high B when we average them together, and it’s just a quiz.”
* * *
The soccer team had three games that week, two away and one home. They won the first two games with Jamie leading the way with four goals, but at the end of the second game, Celeste went down with a knee injury. They put Beth Harding in for Celeste, but she wasn’t strong enough to control the middle of the field. Losing Celeste was a bad break for Stowe.
