by Brent Miller
The car ride with Hayden was silent the entire way. He parked at the school and they both sat in the car awkwardly. They both knew there was so much to say, but neither was willing to start it. Of course, Hayden had tried. She was just waiting for Garrick to be ready. After a few minutes, she looked convinced that he wouldn’t, so she reached for her handle. He placed his hand gently on hers and pulled it back. If he didn’t talk then, it would only get more difficult to start the conversation. He took a deep breath but didn’t follow it through with anything. He was still formulating the words, and he didn’t want to say anything he didn’t mean.
“I’m okay,” he finally offered. That was his brilliant line, what he had taken all weekend to concoct. He meant it, though. Of course, he wasn’t happy, but he really did believe he was okay. He looked her directly in the eyes. “I’m sorry for this weekend. It’s just hard for me to grasp it.”
“I know,” she sighed. “I just wish you hadn’t shut me out.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have. I was just confused.”
“Why?”
“You were so calm.”
“You needed me to be.”
“It’s just that none of you even seemed to react,” he added. He spoke slowly, careful with his words. The last thing he wanted was to sound accusatory, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to move on if he didn’t tell her how he felt – and if he didn’t ask the question that had been burning in his mind. “It’s happened before, hasn’t it?”
“Garrick…”
“Please, Hayden. I have to know.”
“Don’t make me answer that.”
He let go of her and looked down. He sighed, and they both just sat there for a moment. Garrick started to feel like it would be better to just drop it. His head would always be swimming with thoughts, but that was a clear enough answer in his head. He opened his door and got out of the car, then closed the door and leaned against it – holding his head in his hands.
He heard her door close and her footsteps as she walked around the back of the car to stand next to him. She was quiet for a bit longer, but he could feel her presence. He could feel the tension as she tried to force herself to say something difficult.
“Yes.”
Garrick didn’t respond. It wasn’t a surprising answer by any means – it was just the one he’d wished wasn’t true.
“Three times before. People camping at the wrong time.”
“Why are we still going out there? I thought we were supposed to be protecting people,” he responded angrily. He felt his voice raise, so he had to lower it back down as students walked around them. He breathed deeply, fighting back the anger.
“I don’t know, Garrick. You know we can only remember flashes.”
“I can’t,” he said. After a few minutes, he asked her the question he’d been dreading. If he was honest with himself, it was probably the fear of the answer that had kept him so debilitated through the weekend. “Was it me?”
“It wasn’t you. It wasn’t any of us,” she comforted. “You know that. It isn’t us.”
“Did I kill?” He asked again, with more force this time. A general answer that he wasn’t the wolf wouldn’t suffice that time. A life had been taken, and he had to know what his role had been in it. He stood up straight, trying to feign confidence, but kept looking at the ground.
“I don’t know. What I do remember from the night, we weren’t even with them.”
He breathed a sigh of relief and ran his fingers through her hair. She slowly reached out her hand. He didn’t take it. Instead, he grabbed her arm and pulled her toward him, holding her in a long embrace.
“I’m sorry,” he told her.
“It’s okay.”
“I love you, Hayden. I love you.”
“Is something troubling you, Garrick Elliott?” Tyler asked as they sat in the cafeteria. It had been obvious this conversation was coming. Garrick and Tyler didn’t spend many full weekends apart, and Garrick very rarely ignored his friend’s texts. He just wished he had a good excuse – or that he could tell his friend the truth.
“Just had a tough weekend,” was what he said instead.
“Did anything in particular happen? Would you like to converse?”
Garrick looked at his friend. Even after all the years he’d known him, Garrick still couldn’t determine exactly when Tyler’s dialect was intentional for humor. Tyler wore a comforting smile that just made it even harder to hide the truth from him. If Garrick could trust anyone in the world, it was Tyler. Why was he fighting so hard to keep half of his world a secret from his best friend? Didn’t he owe Tyler some kind of honesty?
“I…” He knew he couldn’t say anything. Questions swarmed through his mind. If he were to finally open up, where would he even begin? How would he prove that he was telling the truth? He’d sound crazy. It was best, like Aldric had taught them, to not tell humans about their existence.
“Can I talk to you?” Cailean asked from behind Garrick. Garrick wasn’t sure where he’d come from – but it was as if he had a sense for any thoughts of divulging confidential information. Garrick wasn’t sure he’d have said anything, but Cailean’s timing was uncanny.
“I think we’d prefer you didn’t,” Tyler said with a smirk.
“Good thing I meant him,” Cailean replied confidently, “and it wasn’t really a suggestion.”
“Interesting,” Tyler said as he turned to stand, clenching his fists. “Because I wasn’t actually stating a preference.”
Garrick could see Cailean’s eyes light up. He always enjoyed toying with people – pushing whatever buttons he could. He was trying to get Tyler worked up for the sole purpose of proving he could.
“It’s okay, Tyler,” Garrick told him, placing a hand on his friend’s shoulder as he stood. Tyler sighed and relaxed his shoulders, but he still appeared ready for a fight. Garrick wanted to believe Cailean wouldn’t let this altercation escalate to a brawl in the lunchroom, but he wasn’t convinced. He knew that Tyler would go that far to protect his friends. He also knew, unfortunately, that Tyler would have no chance in that fight, so it was his turn to be the protector for a change. As he followed Cailean to the door, Garrick could feel Tyler’s gaze burning a hole in his back. The distrust in his eyes demonstrated that his regard for Cailean was about as high as Garrick’s.
The moment they rounded the corner, Cailean turned to face Garrick. Grabbing his shoulders, Cailean slammed him against the wall. Garrick gasped for breath, but quickly recovered and struggled to break free, though he knew it was a completely futile effort. Cailean held firm, pinning Garrick’s arms to his sides; any time Garrick moved too much, he would just pull him forward and thrust him back into the brick. Finally, Garrick gave up.
“What have we told you about telling people?” He snarled.
“I am not going to tell him,” Garrick sighed, more exasperated than anything else. He wasn’t completely convinced he was telling the truth, but he thought he was. Before Cailean had shown up, he’d already made the decision that it was safer not to tell him. He didn’t need to hear the lecture again.
“You better not. I won’t let you put us all in danger like that.”
“I told you I won’t say anything. I haven’t for a year. Why would I now?”
“Maybe you need someone to cry to when you saw what happened. Well, trust me, Garrick. It is going to be worse if they find out.”
“Let go of me.”
Cailean didn’t budge. He just stared at Garrick with animalistic fury. More unsettling, though, was the fear. Cailean wasn’t just angry – he was concerned about what might happen if someone discovered what they were. Before Garrick had a moment to process, he was free. A split second passed where he actually thought Cailean had let go, but then he saw that the young man was about a foot off the ground. He soared through the hallway, impacting the lockers with a bang and sliding down to the ground. Garrick saw Chase standing where Cailean had been.
Chase turned
, towering over Cailean as he stood up straight and glared down at him. Cailean quickly stood up – any semblance of fear now replaced with anger.
“He’s one of us,” Chase spat. “Treat him like it.”
“I’d do the same to you if I saw a risk that you’d tell someone.”
“And maybe it would work for me. But not for him.”
Cailean just glared at Chase for a minute before his rage subsided. He turned and stormed down the hallway.
“Just in time,” Garrick exhaled. “I almost hurt him.”
“Right,” Chase laughed as he turned to face Garrick.
“Seriously, I had him.”
“No, you didn’t.”
“Thanks,” Garrick offered after a brief moment of awkward silence.
“Any time. You okay?”
“I’m sick of people asking that. I’m fine!” Garrick snapped.
“I… meant about the being slammed against a wall by a werewolf.”
“Oh. Yeah, that. Sorry.”
“Come on,” Chase said, wrapping his arm around his friend’s shoulder. “Let’s go eat.”
Garrick sat on the stairs after school, waiting for Hayden to find her way to him. Tyler and Kayla walked by, hand in hand, but Garrick was confident he’d gone unnoticed. That was definitely preferable. As much as he’d have liked to say goodbye to Tyler. Garrick was just losing his ability to pretend to like Tyler’s girlfriend – if there was ever an ability in the first place. While he was happy for Tyler, it also hurt to watch. Knowing that love existed, and having found someone who actually brought a smile to Garrick’s face, made it harder to see Tyler wasting his time. He deserved someone who made him smile more than, on a good day, half of the time.
Completely lost in his thoughts, he didn’t notice Hayden sit down. Silently, she leaned her head on his shoulder. Without a thought, he wrapped his arm around her. All of it felt instinctual at that point - the movements barely even registered. For a moment, it felt like all of the other people were gone. Finally looking up, he realized that feeling wasn’t too far off. The school was nearly empty. Garrick had no idea how long he’d been stuck in his mind, or how long Hayden had been sitting there. Though he wished the only thing polluting his thoughts was Tyler’s broken relationship – there was so much more. He didn’t know how to cope with all of the news – but in that moment he was satisfied knowing, or at least believing, he didn’t kill anyone.
“I need to talk to Aldric,” Garrick said, skipping past the greetings.
“About?”
“Everything.”
“Garrick, you know he won’t like being challenged.”
“I’m not challenging him. I just need to know how this is justified. People are dead, Hayden. And everyone is just pretending nothing happened. That isn’t right.”
“No, it’s not.”
He expected some kind of argument to follow, but she just agreed. She seemed to be lost in her own thoughts. Garrick allowed the silence to linger for a moment longer – giving her time to mention anything she wanted to. Standing up, Garrick kept his arm around her and led her to the car.
The drive was quiet too. It wasn’t an awkward silence, and it didn’t feel like there was some lingering issue they hadn’t discussed. It was just a comfortable silence. Of course, that was probably because Garrick was in his head, trying to plan out the best wording for the conversation he didn’t want to have.
“Alright,” Garrick muttered as they pulled up to Aldric’s house. He spent a moment psyching himself up – drumming on the steering wheel. “Alright.”
“There’s not really another way to get your questions answered,” Hayden encouraged.
“Weren’t you trying to talk me out of this?”
“I’m curious now,” she shrugged. “Go on, I’ll wait here.”
“Oh? Not curious enough to hear him yell?” Garrick joked.
“You’re such a great storyteller, I’d rather hear it from you.”
He smiled, releasing his death grip on the steering wheel. Breathing in a few more times, he prepared to talk to Aldric. He wasn’t afraid of him – at least not in the sense that he thought Aldric would ever hurt any of his own. It was just that none of the pack wanted Aldric angry at them. No one challenged Aldric – not even his son. Garrick knew that wandering in there and demanding answers wasn’t one of his best ideas. More, though, he knew it had to be done.
He knocked on the door and a woman answered.
“Mrs. Phoenix,” Garrick said with a smile. She welcomed him with a hug and smiled warmly at him. It baffled Garrick that this kind woman found a stern and stoic man like Aldric. Maybe there was a bit of truth to the idea that opposites attract.
“Garrick, it’s so good to see you!” She beamed. Closing the door behind him, she added, “and on a day when you’re not camping, at that.”
“Yeah, sorry,” he blushed. He hadn’t really thought about the fact that he never visited. While he didn’t feel great about that, the house wasn’t the most inviting place.
“Do you want something to drink?”
“No, I’m okay. I’m just here to talk to Aldric,” Garrick responded. He didn’t want to cut her off, but he was ready for the conversation, and he was concerned that if he waited too long, he’d lose his resolve.
“Well, you usually are,” she said, walking to the kitchen. “Doesn’t mean you won’t get thirsty.”
“I’m okay,” he laughed. “Thanks, though.”
“Alright then,” she said, turning to face him. “He’s upstairs in the study.”
“Thanks.” He hesitated for a second longer, but then took a deep breath and headed up the stairs.
“Come in,” Aldric said when Garrick’s hand was a few inches from the door. He opened it slowly.
“Hello,” he said, barely audible over the creaking of the door. Off to a great start, he told himself.
“Oh, Elliott. I wasn’t expecting you.”
Garrick walked inside and closed the door behind him. Aldric was clearly able to see through his very poorly concealed agenda, and he looked at Garrick skeptically. Garrick expected him to ask what he wanted, or why he’d come, but that wasn’t what was said.
“How are you doing, Elliott?” His voice had never sounded so soft.
“I think I’m okay,” Garrick said. He inched toward Aldric and sat across from him at the desk. Aldric’s intimidating presence loomed over him, even though all of his words so far were kind. Maybe Garrick was just anticipating the argument he knew he was about to start.
“I’m glad.”
“I just have to know, Aldric. Has this happened before?” He knew the answer, but he had to hear it from him. Garrick needed to hear Aldric admit it if he was going to get anywhere with the conversation.
“Yes.”
“Why do we let it? I thought we were going to the woods to protect people?”
“I lead you to a wildlife preserve. Campers are not permitted, and they are warned that it’s a dangerous area. Sometimes people break those rules. While it is unfortunate, it isn’t my duty to protect them.”
“Isn’t it, though? To stop yourself from hurting people?”
“My pack comes first, Elliott,” he said. “This is the only way to guarantee I fulfill my duty to you. This is how we stay safe. You just have to trust me on that.”
“But you haven’t given me a reason.”
“The reason is that none of you are dead.”
“What about the basement? We couldn’t hurt anyone.”
“What if we got out? The whole town would be in danger. Innocent people who weren’t trespassing. My wife would be in danger.”
“I just think…”
“Don’t,” Aldric said, his voice growing harsh. “You don’t have to think. It is not your responsibility to process anything about any of this. Trust that I will handle it. This is the only way.”
“I can’t accept that.”
“What?” Aldric asked, genuine shock in his v
oice.
“I’m done accepting your word as law,” Garrick said, standing. He wasn’t sure where that surge of power was coming from – he knew it wasn’t like him. Still, the pent-up emotions from over the weekend came pouring out. The vague reasoning over the past year had finally taken its toll. Garrick couldn’t bite his tongue anymore. “You’re wrong on this, Aldric. We can’t just keep putting people at risk.”
“Get out,” Aldric said. Surprisingly, the anger had faded. His voice was calmer than Garrick had ever heard. That was more frightening, though, than a screaming match.
“Gladly. I’ll find my own way to do this, and I’ll show you that I can stop the casualties. I won’t be a murderer.”
Aldric was stunned – he clearly wasn’t expecting such a strong reaction from Garrick. Maybe he just believed that the pack would perpetually and blindly trust his word. Still, he held a smirk on his face. He started to laugh, quietly at first, but then it grew louder. His shock became amusement. Confused, Garrick just watched Aldric, trying to determine what was possibly going through the man’s mind. Before he even registered that Aldric had moved, Garrick felt an intense pain in his stomach. Aldric had leapt over the table and drove his fist into Garrick’s gut without giving Garrick a second to respond.
The impact was enough to lift Garrick off his feet and send him a few feet back. He was convinced a few ribs broke, and maybe a bone in his back as he collided with the wall. For a second, he just sat there, trying to catch his breath. Even if he could breathe, he knew he’d be too shocked and too slow to fight back. Aldric grabbed his neck and lifted him into the air. Garrick struggled, but realized he had no hope of breaking the iron grip.
“The only reason you’re still alive, Elliott, is because of me,” he spat. “You think you can live alone, but you can’t even survive one attack from me? You’ll die out there, kid. The only reason that I haven’t killed you yet is because you’re one of us. As pathetic of a werewolf as you may be, you are still one. And unlike you, I don’t betray my kind.”
