by Fiona Leitch
I opened up the food truck, tethering Germaine to the steps on a long leash, and thought back over the conversation Nathan and I had had with the producer the day before. He’d been keen to get the case number so that he could claim on the production’s accident insurance, and I’d laughed at Nathan’s veiled warning about not claiming just yet; but despite the fact he’d only said that to wind Mancuso up, Nathan had turned out to be right. Mayhew’s death was looking like a deliberate act, not an accident or even misadventure, and knowing how hard most insurance companies will fight not to cough up any money on even the most genuine claim, I couldn’t believe they would pay out on a possible murder. Maybe that was why the shoot had started again? A production of this size must cost … well, I had no idea how much it cost to make a film, but you hear about Hollywood movies with budgets the size of a small country’s GDP, and with a cast and crew of this size, and with the hire of Polvarrow House, and all the equipment – even things like the horses and Gino’s food truck (and me) – they probably couldn’t afford to keep paying all those people for just sitting around and doing nothing.
I fired up the big catering urns so the cast and crew could at least have tea and coffee, then got some bacon cooking. Film crews love bacon baps, Gino had told me, and he was right. Once that was done I would take Germaine for a walk around the set to stop her getting bored and into mischief.
‘You’re back, then,’ said Lucy, the first AD. She was standing by the counter, waiting for the urns to heat up. ‘I thought maybe it was Gino. Sam seemed to think you were actually a copper, not a chef.’
‘Bit of both,’ I said, smiling. ‘I have to say I’m surprised to be back. I thought the shoot would be shut down for longer.’
Lucy smiled tightly. ‘Yeah, me too. It seems there’s little room for sentiment in filmmaking…’
‘A shoot like this must cost a lot to run,’ I said. ‘And these people still want paying, even when they’re not able to work.’
‘Yes,’ she said. ‘I was under the impression that’s what we have insurance for, but obviously not.’
‘No…’ So maybe it wasn’t common knowledge yet that it had been murder? Or maybe it just hadn’t occurred to her that an insurance policy was unlikely to cover that eventuality. She made herself a cup of tea and nodded to me before wandering off.
I turned around to flip bacon, but it wasn’t long before I was interrupted again.
‘All right?’ Zack’s voice didn’t have that usual note of cheerful swagger about it; he must still be wracked with guilt. I was surprised that Nathan hadn’t told him he was off the hook yet.
‘How’re you doing?’ I asked, in a sympathetic tone of voice. He shrugged.
‘Been better.’
‘And Aiko? Has she recovered?’
‘She’s on the mend, still a bit weak though.’ He smiled sadly. ‘Not the best start to a relationship, is it?’
‘You really like her, don’t you?’ I asked. He gave me a slow, shy smile. Aww, sweetheart! I thought. I reached over the counter and patted his hand. ‘I’m sure it’ll be fine. If it’s meant to be, it will be.’ I thought of Tony as I said that, and I sincerely hoped for Zack’s sake that his relationship was meant to be. ‘Look, about the fish—’
‘I know, I know, I should never have served it,’ he said. He shook his head. ‘I still can’t believe I cocked it up.’
I looked around, but there was no one else about. I had to tell him and put his mind at rest. ‘I don’t think you did. This can’t go any further, okay?’ I (metaphorically) rolled my eyes at myself; I’d been saying that a lot over the last couple of days, and I really hoped that all the people I’d sworn to secrecy really could keep quiet.
Zack looked mystified. ‘Of course! Go on.’
‘It wasn’t the fish.’
‘But – I heard they found the neurotoxin…’
‘They did. But the fish Gino got you, it’s non-toxic. That’s why he was happy to order it for you. I just wish he’d told me about it before.’
Zack sagged suddenly and I thought for a moment he was going to pass out.
‘Oh my God…’ he said.
‘Go and sit down,’ I told him. ‘I’ll bring you a cuppa.’
I turned off the stove (the bacon would have to wait a few more minutes) and joined Zack at a picnic bench, untying Germaine so she could come and be sociable. I pushed a mug of hot tea over to him as she snuffled at his feet and put her paws sympathetically on his lap. He smiled and patted her, then looked up to see me watching him closely.
‘Don’t tell me, I’ve gone all pale,’ he said, and I laughed.
‘Well, you have gone a bit beige…’ He gave one of his big belly laughs, and I knew he was feeling better.
‘Keep what I just told you to yourself for the moment,’ I said. ‘The police haven’t made it official yet, and we don’t want to disturb any lines of enquiry.’
‘What lines of enquiry?’ asked Zack, and then that shocked expression came back. ‘You don’t mean—’ He looked around too then, and dropped his voice. ‘You don’t mean murder?’
I shrugged, trying to look like there could be myriad completely innocent reasons for pufferfish toxin ending up in a cupcake… ‘I dunno. Probably not.’ Aware that I probably didn’t sound terribly convincing, I struggled for something else to say, and suddenly inspiration struck me. ‘You know this supposed ‘curse’? All these stupid accidents and pranks? Well, I’m thinking that maybe this was just another prank that got out of hand.’
‘Really?’ Zack looked doubtful.
‘I think it’s definitely something we have to consider,’ I said. ‘How many accidents have happened here? Kimi’s dog escaping, light bulbs blowing, the generator shorting out, the food-truck stairs breaking, Faith’s caravan door getting jammed…’ Zack shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He made himself stop quickly, but I’d already spotted it. I recognised the signs… ‘I reckon,’ I said carefully, ‘if we find out who’s behind those pranks, we’ll find out who’s behind the food poisoning.’
Zack avoided my eyes, staring down into his mug and stirring the hot tea with his finger.
‘Is there something you want to tell me?’ I asked. He looked up before he could stop himself, then away again.
‘Course not.’ It was his turn to sound unconvincing. Germaine gave a little whine, like she didn’t believe him either.
‘Zack,’ I said, ‘if you know something, you need to tell me or the police. If you tell me, I can decide whether it’s something they need to know or whether we can forget about it. If you don’t tell me and the police find out later – and they always do find out later – then it won’t look very good on you, will it?’
He looked at me again, obviously weighing something up in his mind.
‘Zack,’ I said. ‘We're mates, right? We’ve cooked together. I’d give you a job chopping veg if you ever gave up acting…’ He gave a small laugh. ‘So you know I’m on your side, right? If you’ve done something daft…’
He looked defensive. ‘Everyone thinks she’s this National Treasure, and she acts all motherly to the younger actors on set, but she’s a right bloody racist.’
‘Really?’ I was surprised. Faith’s on-screen husband in Mile End Days was a big Jamaican guy, and their ‘children’ were all mixed-race actors. It seemed to me that it would be easy to be prejudiced against a group of people you knew nothing about, but if you were working closely with them, for several years in Faith’s case, it would be difficult to keep that up; you surely couldn’t help but realise they were exactly the same as you in every single aspect that mattered. ‘Are you sure? What makes you think that?’
‘I borrowed a phone charger off her and I was on my way to take it back,’ said Zack. ‘I was outside her trailer and I heard her talking, and she said Kimi and me were the production’s ‘diversity hires’. She was mouthing off saying that we only got the nod as part of some box-ticking exercise to get funding.’
I looked a
t him, shocked. That really was a horrible thing to say, and blatantly untrue because both he and Kimi were talented actors. I still couldn’t quite believe that Faith would say that, though, despite having had my own doubts about her earlier; but then I’d realised that my own judgement had been clouded by jealousy over her and Tony. That jealousy was still kind of there, but had subsided enough for me to actually quite like the woman. ‘So what did you do?’
‘I was really upset and angry,’ he said. ‘I was going to burst in and have a go at her, but I didn’t want to make a big scene. Because to be honest, I’ve been on sets where I am the diversity hire, and I didn’t want to find out if what she was saying was true.’ I reached out and touched his arm, feeling immense sympathy for him. ‘I didn’t know what to do, but then I felt in my pocket and I still had this tube of superglue one of the crew gave me. Bits kept falling off my stupid sword and I was using it to stick them back on.’ I remembered him brandishing the sword the day of the dinner party, striking a heroic pose with it before a big plastic red jewel in the hilt had fallen off.
‘You squirted glue in the lock,’ I said, and he nodded.
‘Yeah. I had some mates back home who had this squat in Tulse Hill years ago, and they tried to stop the police getting in by buggering up all the locks with superglue.’
‘So how did your mates get in and out?’ I asked, interested in spite of myself.
‘They climbed through the windows,’ he said. ‘It was a third-floor flat and all. Their next-door neighbour used to let them climb onto his balcony then let them out.’ He grinned. ‘I couldn’t see Faith doing that… But look, it was just a daft thing; she was never going to get hurt.’
‘Okay,’ I said. ‘So you were the one who sabotaged Faith’s caravan. What about the other things? Did you let Kimi’s dog out?’
Zack shook his head. ‘Of course I didn’t. Why would I? Between you and me, I quite like that dog.’ Germaine settled on his feet with an approving grunt. He laughed. ‘And this one, too. Maybe I am a dog person after all.’
‘You don’t know who was behind that, or any of the other pranks?’
‘No,’ he said, but I was suddenly not so sure.
‘Zack…’ I said warningly. He sighed again.
‘Oh, all right. You might want to talk to Aiko about the dog.’
Chapter Twenty-Three
Zack was due on set, so I went back to the bacon and finished setting everything out for breakfast/brunch-time butties. Then I clipped the lead on Germaine and headed over to Wardrobe to see how Daisy and Mum were getting on.
I’d timed it perfectly, as they had just finished getting their clothes and make-up on, and the two of them looked amazing.
‘I don’t believe it!’ I said. ‘You’re both members of the aristocracy!’
‘Too blooming right we are!’ said Mum, indignantly adjusting her crinoline. ‘Ain’t no peasants in this family.’
‘Mum was,’ smirked Daisy.
‘They just didn’t want me to outshine Kimi,’ I said, and was mildly offended when both of them guffawed loudly. ‘Seriously, you both look lovely. Did you see Jade?’ I asked Daisy. She nodded.
‘She’s playing one of the fairy folk,’ she said. ‘She’s got wings. She had to turn sideways to get out the door.’
We were interrupted by the sound of a wolf whistle. I turned round to see Tony grinning, although he looked a little uncertain when he looked at me.
‘Wow, Shirl, look at you!’ he said. ‘You do know I’ve always had a thing about older women?’
‘Faith does,’ I said in a low voice, but I was only messing about.
Mum laughed and hit him (harder than he expected, going by the way he flinched) with her embroidered fan.
‘Ooh you’re a cheeky one, Tony Penhaligon! Your dad was just the same in his younger days.’
‘Now that I don’t want to know,’ he said. ‘Daisy, you look really lovely.’ Daisy smiled, but she was distracted by the sight of Jade getting her wings wedged into a gap between two trailers and went to free her. Mum looked at the two of us in a way that made it really obvious I’d told her about our kiss.
‘I’ll give you two some space,’ she said, turning away.
‘Mum, there’s no need—’
‘It’s fine, Shirley—’
But she was off. We stood and looked at each other.
‘Are we really okay?’ asked Tony, and just like that we were. The ice was broken.
‘Of course,’ I said. ‘It was bound to be a bit awkward, seeing each other today, but it’s for the best, innit?’
‘It is. Unless you’ve changed your mind?’
‘No. Have you?’
‘No, I haven’t.’ Tony sighed. ‘It would have been proper easy, though. I mean, I’m already used to your funny little ways…’
‘What funny little ways? Flipping cheek. I’m used to your smell, and I don’t even really notice anymore when you wipe your nose on your sleeve…’
‘Yeah, whatever.’ Tony grinned at me. ‘I see you told your mum.’
‘And you told Debbie.’
‘Callum, actually.’
‘Same thing.’
Lucy appeared and began collecting extras, so I let him go, wished Mum and Daisy good luck, and then headed over to Zack’s trailer, which was now officially (as far as I was concerned, anyway) a crime scene.
Sergeant Adams was on duty today, sitting on a fold-up chair, guarding the stairs up to the trailer. Germaine bounded over to him and popped her front paws on his knees, making him laugh. He patted her head and looked up at me.
‘All right there, young Jodie?’ he said.
‘I’m good, thanks. They let you out of the station, then?’ He was rapidly approaching retirement age and not really up for chasing criminals, so they normally kept him on desk duty but occasionally they let him out for a change of scenery.
‘Yeah. Dunno what I done to deserve that,’ he grinned, taking a small paper bag from his pocket and offering it to me. ‘Jelly baby?’
‘I can never say no to a jelly baby,’ I said, selecting a red one and popping it into my mouth.
‘If you’re looking for the DCI, he’s on his way,’ said Sergeant Adams, shuffling about in his seat. ‘And not a moment too soon, either. I needs relieving for a pi— For a bit.’
‘I can take over, if you want?’ I said, but he shook his head.
‘He’d have my guts for garters if I deserted my post,’ he said. ‘I just ’ope he comes soon, otherwise…’
‘Cavalry’s here,’ said Nathan from behind me. I turned round and he gave me that smile of his, full beam. Don’t swoon, woman! I told myself sternly, but my self-chastising didn’t have much effect. ‘Sergeant Adams, whatever dire thing was going to happen doesn’t need to happen now, does it? Off you go. We’ll be inside.’ He stood back and gestured for me to go up the stairs in front of him, as Sergeant Adams leapt up in a far sprightlier manner than I would have given him credit for and dashed off towards the Portaloos. I tied Germaine to the steps (she gave me a look of hurt resignation as I did so) and led the way up.
Inside Zack’s trailer, the scene was pretty much how we’d left it. The Scene of Crime team had been over it the morning after Mayhew’s death, but at that point we’d been pretty certain it was the fish, so they had been there more to prove that theory than find another cause of death.
We stood at the table and looked at what was left of the food. It was starting to smell, and I thanked my lucky stars that we were in this draughty caravan in October and not in July, when it would have been a sweltering metal box.
‘So…’ said Nathan, looking at me.
‘So…’ I said, looking at him.
‘What are you thinking?’ he asked. I was actually thinking about him swiping everything off the table and onto the floor, then flinging me onto it to make mad passionate love to me, but I could hardly admit that.
‘I’m thinking,’ I said, playing for time as I desperately tried to th
ink of something that didn’t sound like the final scene in a Mills-and-Boon bodice ripper, ‘I’m thinking, you didn’t tell Zack that it wasn’t the fish yet. You don’t seem to have told anyone.’
He smiled. ‘You’re right, I haven’t. But I’m assuming that you have told him?’
I nodded. ‘Yes. The poor bloke was falling apart from the guilt, not just of killing Jeremy but of poisoning his new girlfriend as well. I did tell him to keep it to himself, though. Said we didn’t want to prejudice any lines of enquiry.’
‘‘Prejudice lines of enquiry’? Oh that sounds good; that sounds really legit.’ Nathan grinned. ‘No, really, that’s a good one. Do you think he will tell anyone else?’
‘I don’t know. Maybe Aiko. Why don’t you want anyone to know?’
‘Well, one, I was waiting for the lab results to come back on the fish – they have now; negative of course – and two, I just wanted to see how everyone would react, to see if anyone gave themselves away.’
‘How would they do that?’
‘Well, look at all this. There’s not much food left here, but there is a bit. If I’d slipped the toxin into something, I’d stay quiet until it looked like the pufferfish was going to get the blame for it – which as far as they all know, it has – and then I’d be the first person to suggest that we send the cleaners in to get rid of all the mess, so Zack can have his caravan back.’
‘And you think that’ll work?’
‘No idea. The other thing is to find what was actually poisoned, and see if we can narrow down who had access to it and was therefore most likely to have done it.’
‘Or, like I suggested ages ago, we find out what it was that everyone apart from Kimi and Faith, who didn’t get sick, ate. Neither of them had the pufferfish, but they also didn’t have—’
‘The cupcakes,’ he said.
‘I was suspicious of them all along,’ I said. ‘No one knows where they came from.’
