Garbage Man
The garbage truck came by today
Making all its noise
Taking out the junk of life
Trash and broken toys
I really like the garbage truck
The huge machine of steel
With two strong arms to lift the stuff
One Worker at the wheel
There comes a time to throw it out
The garbage in our can
Stuff that doesn’t need to stay
Removed by Garbage Man
It makes you feel much better
As the big truck rolls away
Taking trash in any weather
Stuff that shouldn’t stay
Spirit’s Age
Being youngest was my fate
I always felt I had to wait
For school to start and when it did
Well there I was, the shortest kid
I had to wait for hand-me-downs
Not often did I go to town
I sensed inferiority
It seemed to have a hold on me
Even at the lesson’s start
I didn’t notice I was smart
That I was leading in the class
I thought that I was always last!
It took some time to understand
The mind and heart make up the man
At no time was I ever less
My gauges changed to measure “best”
Life will turn from page to page
It’s wise to grow in spirit’s age
Let virtues be your self esteem
The part of you that can’t be seen
Chocolate and Troy
My hand is still a little sore from cutting the bed sheet in half as Jeffrey hung from the door hinge in the hall yesterday. I hope the boss approves of the paperwork.
He is one of the many manipulative, narcissistic, borderline, passive aggressive types we deal with every day. Some of the patients say he “has a little sugar in his tank.”
Reviewing the tape gave the security guys a good laugh. Stealing a laugh from tragedy seems to help us stay sane at the locked forensic unit full of half witted inmates hoping to avoid real jail time. They have been deemed “incompetent” to stand trial, so we get them for several months.
Some of the staff is just like Jeffrey simply wearing scrubs as they sit inside the nurse’s station with its locked doors and impenetrable glass windows. They just have a slightly tighter grip on their transparency.
Me, I like to be out of the nurse’s station around the inmates. I hope their lives aren’t doomed. I know their charges aren’t heinous, hell I’ve done most everything they got caught doing. It could be true the thought, “only the stupid ones get caught.” Being bipolar and/or psychotic can’t help either. They’re young and still have a chance. I love to bring out their talents and motivate them.
I’m off today after three twelve hour shifts and I’m exhausted. I slept through a tornado last night. Looking through windows I see tree trunks and limbs all over the yard.
I feel guilty I must not have heard mom calling for me during the storm. The baby monitor cut off. Her bedroom is downstairs cluttered with elderly support paraphernalia. She is short of breath, tightly gripping her walker as she is determined to reach the lift recliner (her pajamas hanging as she has lost weight). Her brows are bent under mussed up grey hair. She is angry at the sitters, the “necklace,” the bad foot and the oxygen tubing. She is angry about her fading balance, the itching skin rash and her fleeting mind.
“You call them and make them pick that so-called emergency box up! It yelled ‘power off’ all night long!” She sits in the recliner frustrated that the buttons don’t work while the power is out.
I light the kerosene heater. I agree with her. I apologize for not hearing her call for me. She watches as I head to the kitchen to prepare what I can for breakfast and her pills.
“Mom, let me rub lotion on your skin.”
“My nurse is back.” Her voice has softened. She emanates gratefulness.
“Yes!” I say, as a gentle massage of warm lotion eases her frail and tired body.
She falls asleep in the recliner. I cover her with her fuzzy blanket.
Tears roll down my cheeks. I sit with my back to mom so if she wakes she won’t see. I wipe my face and neck in lonely silence.
It’s time to eat some chocolate and text my brother, Troy. He reminds me that living a life of purpose and meaning is not always easy. He praises me and I am ready for whatever comes next.
Shelly the Hermit Crab
Dad took me to “Crabby Farms”
I thought she was amazing
Her pointed tiny monstrous arms
So many they were caging
A porous metal box with sand
Driftwood to rest her belly
I watched her drag a shell around
And soon her name was Shelly
“She’ll need another home soon”
My dear father said to me
Her family, food and sand dune
Were all just by the sea!
Shelly didn’t seem to mind
Spending time with me
Because she was a friend of mine
I had to set her free
Mans Port in the Storm
The ship was rocked by the waves of want and need. The captain stood at the mast considering options. The uncertainty of navigation through the blowing unpredictable winds was very real. He knew what he wanted and what he needed for him to live his fullest life. He could see the distant lights from several villages on land. Although he had prepared, he was apprehensive about his situation at sea in “the playground of ports.”
The earliest hours of day were dangerous and unsure. A storm was eminent. Only a few light houses could guide him to safety. He was exhausted for his journey had been a long one. Only God knew his true heart and his ideal place to live in love and peace. So the man asked Him, “Where is my perfect port in this storm?”
God replied, “Trust me. Be patient. You will see.” The sea began to rage. In no time, crests were washing over his deck; the ship seemed no match for the ocean’s mood.
The captain shouted, “Dear God I prepared! I set out to arrive where I should! Which port do You lead me too! We are taking on water! I am so tired.”
A deafening clap of lighting pierced the starboard side. It burned violently as the ship headed in the direction of the land. The Captain’s order to abandon ship was unheard by the crew due to the fury of the storm. He could barely see through the uncertainty of his situation. Despite the loss of control, he made courageous and faithful efforts to accept the guidance of a majestic lighthouse. By nothing less than a miracle, he drifted beside a rocky wall of protection. The anchors were lowered as the rains reduced the fire to smoking cinders.
Just after dawn, the countryside was illuminated and warmed by the beautiful sun. The placid sea waters were surrounded by playful seagulls near green lands where all his needs would be met. He found all and more of what he wanted. With a humble heart, the Captain took several minutes to meditate upon his Lord with praise and gratitude, for he had found his beautiful port in the storm.
I Did My Best
After days of restlessness, Mom had not moved for several hours. She lay on her side in the hospital bed provided by the hospice agency. Her breathing was regular, however slow. She continued waiting to hear the voice of her oldest daughter. Grace finally called at noon. I explained to Grace Mom’s condition. I put the phone on “speaker” and held it near our mother. Grace’s voice was trembling. It was clear she was tearful as she spoke.
“I saw Dad, Mom. He was standing in a field of light, surrounded by tall, golden, wavy wheat.” Her voice broke and sounded wet. “He was sm-smilin
g. There was brightness all around him. He was holding Biscuit and Biscuit’s tail was wagging. He told me, ‘Tell your mother I’m waiting for her.’” Grace sucked up air. Her cracking voice continued, “Mom it was so real. He’s waiting for you Mom. Go, be with Dad. I love you Mom!” I praised and thanked my sister. We ended the call.
I returned to Mother’s side and said, “I know you’d hug me if you could. Grace is right. Go be with Dad.” Tears rolled down my face as I held her bluish hand. I caressed her shoulder and back. I softly kissed her forehead. “I’m going to miss you but you go, go be with Dad.”
While her eyes were closed, Mom took just a few more breaths before she stopped breathing. She had struggled with cardiac disease becoming weaker by the day for several months. She suffered through “episodes” that caused faster decline in the last weeks. My mother had been reduced to total dependency in the last days.
There were times she seemed impatient. I did as much as I could to be helpful and a source of comfort. There were days we were both exhausted. I made a few mistakes and beat myself up for them. Caring for mom was one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done. I thought I was up to the task and ready for anything. There were times I realized what I said or did may not have been ideal. I decided I wouldn’t get to be perfect until I got my own set of wings and that I had simply done my best. I also realized that mom compassionately understood me even while she was unable to clearly express her appreciation. She was making the transition to the heavens. Mom told me days before, “For us, ‘I’m sorry’ goes without saying.” It was an honor to be with her then. I carried with me the knowing that I would hold her again in light and in love where mistakes do not exist.
Rainbow of Tears
Tears of laughter crystal clear
Light brown tears for when I fear
Orange and red tears when I’m mad
Indigo blue tears when I’m sad
Fading pink tears turn from blue
When I am truly missing you
When I feel compassion call
Golden silver tears will fall
Many reasons for to cry
Reflected in the rainbow sky
The Spider
The spider crawled up to the door
Creeping closer as I eyed
The little pest upon the floor
He is not allowed inside
I stepped on him outside my door
I tried to make it quick
A twinge of guilt he was no more
He lay dead as a stick
Arachnid got too close to home
What if the spider bites?
Or so he wouldn’t be alone
Brought rats and snakes and mites!
I don’t mess with hornet’s nest
Nor play with baby bear
The lion’s den I leave to rest
I dare not go in there!
Nature has a way I find
Sometimes it don’t seem kind
I’ll stay out of their house
If they’ll stay out of mine!
If Tears Could Talk
I await your next call as I am every ready for you. Made by messages from your heart and mind, I rest silently stored in unseen places. I am eager to arrive when you are very hurt, humored, relieved or feeling any extreme emotion (the “Dictionary of Emotions” is huge).
Please learn not to be embarrassed by me; after all you are a human being. I am warm, soft and easily wiped away. Consider me your droplet friend who protects you from insanity. On the subject of protection, I will be there in times of exposure to toxic fumes or frigid weather or when a bug lands in your eye. I know you need to see so I am looking out for you (no pun intended)!
You and I unite ensuring you are able to express the crescendo of your feelings. Do let me out! I know you try to hold me back sometimes because you fear appearing vulnerable or you are trying to protect someone. I get that, but every time I am on my way, I feel you needing me, even if for only a moment. I apologize for the redness in your eyes. I might get in your nose or roll down your face. Oh, and for some, sorry about the make-up. I clean things up. I feel very special because God is keeping track of every time you and I get together.
Silence
The sound between the tick the tock
We’re waiting for the pin to drop
Silence gives the place to go
Where thoughts are born so that we know
Silence is a precious prize
Yes we have ears and we have eyes
As sounds outside are heard
Silence mentions not a work
Without a sound externally
We listen to the heart
A mother’s love maternally
A sleeping baby’s start
Silence has a gift to bring
If you look for some of it
Your ears may ring, ring-a-ling
You haven’t noticed it!
Just sit still, don’t move a muscle
Hear only sounds inside your head
Forget about your heavy bustle
Listen to God instead
So be a silent seeker bro,
Consider it a treasure
Silence teaches us to grow
Silence is a pleasure
Metamorphosis
From mumbling words to talking
From sippy cups to walking
Riding bikes and running
Jokes, frogs and cunning
Ma Ma’s soup, a hot grilled cheese
Bandages on your skinned knees
Dressing up for fancy dates
Crushes, kisses, choosing mates
Learning from mistakes we’ve made
Too much sun we find the shade
See the flower as it blooms
Butterflies leave their cocoons
We start out green like tiny seeds
Some of us amidst the weeds
You can thrive and grow to be
The highest bloom upon a tree!
Faith
Faith is one of the most commonly used words in theology. It promises nothing. It is disturbing that many people are factual with more confidence in probability. Faith is the sideline cheerleader for uncertainty during times we are concerned and focused on the outcome of diverse circumstances. Faith is defined as, “believing in things unseen.” It is a soft and mysteriously silent word we are attracted to. At times, it is overused or misused; it implies things will go our way if we have it. Faith will change your life by experiencing it but I must explain it is a spiritual word.
There is a recipe for faith: Understand it is a belief in things unseen. It is synonymous with trusting confidence. Faith is a form of letting go and letting God. You should add a dash of hope to it.
Faith has changed my life because I believe in what the heavens tell me. Faith never lets me down. I may have to be patient, but the correct outcome or circumstance presents itself time and time again because I trust in God’s ways. I’m peacefully affected by faith because I know that things will be as they are supposed to be. Faith truly replaces stress and worry. Every experience in life teaches. Have faith that your lessons are from God and make the effort to understand them.
However unclear the purpose of our challenge may be, we try. Faith is a gift to those of us who seek: “Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and his righteousness. And all these things shall be added unto you. Hallelujah!” That means, look for the lessons of God. With faith in your life you will sooner or later understand the lessons and exclaim, “Hurray!”
McConnell Hall
Driving through the hellish traffic
North of Dallas, like a Maverick
My young man, you left the nest
We both knew you’d do your best
Solid painted bricks for walls
Narrow stairways, smelly halls
A desk, a bed, a window square
I knew I had to leave you there
Later when the settling done
You learned so much and you had fun
Your “signature,” if you will
Cans piled high on window sill
You made it big the challenge won
Now the doctor is my son
Looking back at it all
It started at McConnell Hall
Andy Pike and the Gentle Man
Andy Pike was sixty four
His wife, she passed away
No one knocked upon his door
The children couldn’t stay
Andy cook? too big a feat!
He didn’t have the skill
He hardly had desire to eat
He barely had the will
A gentle man across the hall
So Andy Pike would eat
Picked up his phone and made a call
For meals with greens and meat
The gentle man knocked on the door
(He volunteered each day)
Apartment number twenty four
Where Mr. Pike did stay
The door crept open cautiously
Old hands and peeping eyes
The gentle man stood thoughtfully
With hamburgers and fries
Beginning of a brotherhood
The men began to talk
Conversation very good
They went for morning walks
Friendship has a special way
A gift from God to give us more
A buddy gift on any day
Go ahead! Open your door!
Sweethearts
Grandpa’s eyes were blue and small, I sat upon his lap
He said to me, “I sang this song to Grandma where she sat.
‘Let me call you sweetheart I’m in love with you…’”
His eyes, they filled with tears of love then I was crying too
Some of Life's Kettle Corn Page 3
