“This is a big house.” I looked around. “Surely there’s something more interesting to do than watch television…”
“Like stumble on a trove of sex toys?” He chuckled under his breath. “Or porn…”
“Where is your sense of adventure?” I leaned over and nudged him. “You have to clean this place up anyway, right?”
“I do,” he sighed. “Okay, if that’s how you really want to spend your evening.”
I was really just looking for a distraction, and I didn’t think a movie would do it—plus, he would be bored if I picked a comedy, and I would be bored if he picked another weird movie like the first one he chose. I tried to picture the man I was falling for as what he described—a Daddy Dom. I could see the hints of dominance once I knew to look for them—they were always there; I just didn’t know how to recognize those traits. The debt was clearly part of it. He had control from the moment he convinced me to accept that in order to keep Daniella from spending the night in jail. He spun his web and let me get tangled up in it. The problem was—I didn’t know how to escape—and I wasn’t sure I really wanted to.
“This was your father’s bedroom?” I pushed a door open and stared at a room that looked like it had been lived in.
“Yeah.” Corbin nodded. “I haven’t really done anything in there—and after what we found in the pool house, I may just do a controlled burn instead of actually trying to clean it.”
“That might not be a bad idea…” I laughed. “Or maybe you could just hire someone.”
“I might.” He chuckled under his breath. “I was hoping to donate a lot of this stuff, especially the furniture.”
“There’s nothing you want to take with you when you go back to Chicago?” I raised an eyebrow in surprise.
“No, I don’t think so.” He sighed and shook his head. “Whatever answers I was hoping to find—they’re not here.”
“Maybe they are…” I walked over and leaned against the railing. “Somewhere.”
Corbin and I spent the rest of the evening digging through memories while we tossed things in piles to either donate or send to the dump. It was the distraction I needed and let me just focus on being with him without thinking about what he told me in the pool house. We took a few breaks—and the longest one was on a bed in the guest room where our passion erupted to the point that I had trouble denying how much I wanted him. I couldn’t just take a piece though—not after I knew the truth. I had to be strong enough to accept everything he was or claw my way out of his web. I couldn’t dangle myself on one thread while he hung onto another. Corbin was the most amazing man I had ever met, but oil and vinegar weren’t always perfect for each other—even if he thought they could be.
“I guess it’s time for me to go.” I looked at the clock on my cell phone.
“You don’t have to work tomorrow. What’s the rush?” Corbin tilted his head inquisitively.
“I stopped staying up really late on the weekends after high school.” I shrugged. “It just made me a zombie on Monday mornings.”
“I’m sure you were a beautiful zombie.” He smiled and brushed a strand of hair away from my eye.
“You think I’m normally sassy and bratty?” I shook my head and laughed. “You have no idea how I am when I don’t get enough sleep.”
“Does that mean you get up early on the weekends too—when you don’t have to work?” Corbin raised an eyebrow.
“Usually.” I nodded.
“Okay, then I won’t feel guilty about waking you up with a new opportunity to chip away at your debt early tomorrow morning.” He smiled.
“Unless I wake up before you.” I motioned to my phone. “I might send one first.”
Although I have no idea what it would be at this point…
* * *
The next morning
I made it to bed early, but I didn’t get to sleep immediately. I tossed and turned for a couple of hours as what Corbin said tumbled around in my head. Some of what he said sounded nice. I wasn’t opposed to calling him Daddy—it wasn’t like I had anyone who deserved that title in my life. I didn’t even mind him being possessive of me to a certain extent as long as he didn’t try to totally control me. It wasn’t like I was going to give him any reason to be jealous. I wasn’t the kind of girl that got off on that sort of thing. I naturally assumed there would be a certain level of protectiveness and guidance in a relationship, but that wasn’t a one way street—I didn’t exactly keep my opinions to myself—he already knew that. The part I was mainly hung up on was the discipline. I just couldn’t decide if it was a complete deal breaker.
I probably deserved a good hard spanking or two during my rebellious years, but I’ve moved past that now—or have I?
From Corbin’s perspective, he probably didn’t see the growth that I had since I was bucking the system to carve out my place in the world. He didn’t see the years of questioning who I really was while I tried to figure out why my life was so different from what people called normal. I was just the girl foolish enough to follow her best friend over a fence—to skinny dip in a stranger’s pool in the middle of the night because we put it on a bucket list when we were kids. There was a certain level of sassiness and maybe a hint of brattiness, but I was aware of it—it wasn’t total immaturity. I made mistakes like any regular person would and faced those consequences when they came—but with Corbin, I didn’t. I begged my way out of handcuffs, and he took pity on me—then I negotiated Daniella’s freedom with a debt when I had no idea what I would have to do in order to repay it.
Maybe I’ve just pulled the wool over my own eyes and accepted blindness as reality—if I rip that off, the picture looks much different than the one in my head.
I always wielded excuses like they were my sword and shield. I protected myself with them and used them as a weapon when needed. I didn’t care if it was right or wrong, as long as I was the one that came out ahead when it was over. That was a hard reflection to see when I stepped in front of my personal mirror. I always put my needs first. When my mother was struggling and I had a job, I just focused on how I could use that money to make my life better. Getting my own place took some of the burden off her, but I could have stayed there while I went to college—she wouldn’t have had to work so hard if we were splitting some of the costs. We might have even gotten a chance to spend more time together.
Instead, I call her once a week and try to visit for a few hours a couple of times a month—that’s what she gets in exchange for working two jobs to put food on the table and take care of me for nineteen years.
I was never that close with my mom, but I knew she was proud of what I had accomplished in spite of everything—she told me that several times. I don’t know why I saw her as less of a parent when she did the best that she could. I abused the fact that she was always working and too tired to actually discipline me during my rebellious years. She never laid a hand on me, but even when she said I was grounded, I just ignored it—it wasn’t like she was there to know if I actually watched television when she said I couldn’t or came right home after school. I didn’t make the same mistakes she did, but I had plenty of my own. That had never been clearer.
Corbin has never felt like a mistake. I feel so alive when I’m with him—I know what I have to do.
Chapter Fourteen
Corbin
Things felt different after I confessed my secret to Chloe. There was hesitation in her eyes—confusion in her touch. I didn’t feel the same fire when I kissed her. The only time when it came close was when we got carried away on one of the guest beds—but even that didn’t feel totally right. It was mutual attraction and desire that still stained the surface—yet it lacked the passion I had felt every time our lips met before I told her the truth. I knew the danger the moment the words left my lips, but I couldn’t hide from it. The core of who I was couldn’t be changed and if Chloe was ever going to be truly mine, then we had to both be willing to embrace it. The last kiss we shared before she
left was possibly the last time I would taste those lips—and I wasn’t content with it, but I had to let her walk away to see if she would return.
Now I wait—to see if she reaches out to me or if I’ve collected all of this debt that she can give.
I teased her about sending a challenge as soon as I woke up, but I knew I wouldn’t. I didn’t want her to feel like she was obligated to show up at my house because I could type a challenge into my phone and make her appear. We were past that. She had the power to decide, whether she just drove to my house or sent a challenge. If my nature blew everything we had apart, then at least I wouldn’t have to harbor guilt. It would be hard to forget the girl with hypnotic brown eyes—losing her would hurt worse than any of the other women who swept in and out of my life—there was just something about Chloe that drew me in. If I was seeing what I wanted to see in those eyes instead of what I believed lingered in her soul, then all I would be able to take with me when I left Los Angeles were memories of our brief time together.
Fond but they’ll be painful in time…
I walked outside on my back patio with my phone in my hand and drank my morning coffee in front of the pool. Such a simple thing to bring two people together—yet thousands of pieces of an intricate puzzle had to fall into place in order for us to be in that spot at the same time. It was the only moment we could have shared—yet it worked out perfectly. I didn’t want to believe that was just happenstance. I never put much faith in a higher power, but some cosmic force had to pull us towards an incredible instant when the rest of the world faded away, and we claimed that moment as our own. I sipped my coffee, played around on my phone, and then I saw the Chloe’s Debt app light up—I had a challenge. Something inside of me said it was going to be the most important one of my life.
Decline: -225
Open your front door: +275
“She’s here?” I hopped up from my chair immediately and hit the button to accept the challenge.
I had been lost in contemplation, and I didn’t even hear her car arrive—or maybe she sent it before she turned into my driveway. It was the very definition of an all-or-nothing challenge. I either had to accept it or clear her debt entirely—accepting it reset the balance of her debt back to 500. That symbolism wasn’t lost on me. I put down my coffee cup and my phone on the way to the front door and didn’t even look through the peephole before I pulled it open. Chloe was on the other side—just like I hoped.
“Good morning, Daddy.” She bit down on her bottom lip and looked up at me. “I’ve been a really bad girl.”
“Then you better come inside…” I took a step back from the door and watched as she walked into the house.
The look in Chloe’s eyes was different. She didn’t have the same fierceness—she was more relaxed—almost like she had found a way to bring her submissive side to the surface overnight. It was more hypnotic than ever and practically screamed for me to let my dominance run wild. I kept it caged for the moment. I needed to understand what had changed before I could fully embrace what my mind was begging me to accept without question.
“You came back.” I narrowed my eyes. “I wasn’t sure if you would.”
“I wasn’t sure either.” She looked down at the floor. “I had to think about it—and I forced myself to take a really hard look at my life…”
“And?” I titled my head.
“I didn’t like what I saw.” She lifted her head and sighed. “Except when I was with you—that was the one thing I knew was right.”
“What about everything else? You can’t tell me that it was all wrong—I know you better than that.” I tilted my head in the opposite direction.
“The destination felt right, but the way I got there?” She shook her head back and forth. “Not so much.”
I saw tears starting to form in the corner of Chloe’s eyes, so I immediately pulled her in for a hug. She stayed in my arms for several minutes, and then we went into the living room to sit down. She explained what she meant—and basically confessed all of her fears, doubts, and mistakes with a few tears between them. It seemed that she had an incredible weight on her shoulders that needed to be lifted, but she never knew how to move it. Her sassiness—her hints of brattiness—they were just lingering regrets manifested as armor to justify things she never wanted to admit. They weren’t terrible things—they were just fragments of the armor she glued together in order to hide the fact that she had been broken by external and internal forces.
“There’s nothing for you to feel guilty about.” I pulled her into my arms. “Everyone makes mistakes, and the world always looks different when you’re backed into a corner.”
“I’ve always taken so much pride in my independence—but maybe it isn’t something to be proud of,” she sighed. “Especially considering all of the things I could have done differently.”
“No, it absolutely is.” I squeezed her a little tighter. “You handled things the best that you could given the circumstances—I think everything you’ve been able to accomplish is incredible. You made an awful lot of good choices along the way.”
“Thank you.” She leaned back from my embrace.
“I hope I didn’t lead you to believe that I don’t respect what you’ve done. That wasn’t my intention at all.” I tilted my head, and my brow furrowed.
“No, but it forced me to step back and look at myself from a different perspective—I questioned things that I never have before.” She sighed. “That’s when I realized that I had to come back. I need to be able to be vulnerable sometimes and allow myself to let go…”
“You’ll always be safe with me. If you let go, I’ll catch you.” I leaned forward and kissed her forehead.
“That’s why I feel brave enough to do it.” She nodded. “Brave enough to admit that sometimes I may need a little bit of discipline—from my Daddy.”
“Then that’s what you’ll get.” I firmed my tone and narrowed my eyes.
“Now—is one of those times.” She looked up at me.
“You haven’t done anything to deserve it.” I shook my head back and forth.
“I’ve done plenty.” She leaned back and pushed a hand into her pocket. “I even made a list…”
“A list?” I blinked in surprise.
“I wrote it all down before I left my apartment—because I didn’t think I’d be able to actually say it out loud.” She put a folded up piece of paper in my hand.
I had a mild curiosity and a bit of worry as I unfolded the piece of paper that Chloe gave me. It really was a list—it appeared that she had written down everything she could think of that she had done wrong in her life. It was an interesting perspective and lines upon lines of guilt laid out on a single page. There was everything from lying to her mother when she was a little girl to sneaking out of her friend’s house to smoke cigarettes in the woods when she was high school, with plenty of stuff in between like skipping classes, cheating on tests, stealing perfume from the mall, and other things that I assumed she did during her rebellious years. There wasn’t much after high school, but the last item on the list was the one that brought us together—skinny dipping in my pool.
“That’s quite a list.” I leaned forward and put the list on the table. “Are you sure this is what you want? You seemed rather put off by the idea of being disciplined yesterday.”
“It caught me off guard, but I had time to think about it.” She nodded. “I want everything else you talked about—and discipline is a part of it.”
“Okay.” I looked down at the piece of paper. “That list might require more than one trip across my knee…”
“I thought that might be the case, and I had an idea.” She bit down on her bottom lip. “Maybe you could add the list to the app?”
“Hmm.” I tapped my chin in contemplation. “A different kind of debt, but I could probably incorporate it somehow.”
“Which one do I get to check off the list today?” She looked up at me.
“You tell me.” I poin
ted at the list. “Choose one.”
“Okay.” She nodded and picked up the list. “I suppose skinny dipping in the neighbor’s pool would be a good place to start…”
“Fitting.” I raised an eyebrow and nodded. “Stand up and remove your jeans.”
“Panties too?” She started to stand and moved her hands to the front of her jeans.
“You can keep those on—for now.” I leaned back against the couch.
I held my breath when her jeans came down. It was supposed to be disciplined, but I wanted to have her in my bed a whole lot more than I wanted her over my knee. I wasn’t sure how she would react once she was there. Some girls hated it—some liked it—some found it to be an interesting form of stress relief. I would have to judge her reactions. We agreed on a safe word, just in case she needed to make it stop once it started. Chloe kicked off her jeans once they were on the floor and walked closer to me. She was wearing a pair of thin blue cotton panties that wouldn’t do much to protect her from the sting—but she would certainly notice the difference when they came down.
“Tell me why you’re going to get disciplined today.” I tilted my head and studied her expression.
“I did something stupid…” She sighed, and her shoulders slumped forward.
“Yes, but I want to hear you say what you did.” I tilted my head in the opposite direction.
“I let Daniella talk me into skinny dipping in the neighbor’s pool.” She bit down on her bottom lip.
“Did she make you do it?” I narrowed my eyes.
“No…” She looked at me with a confused expression.
“Then it isn’t her fault, is it?” I leaned forward and reached for Chloe’s wrist.
“No, Daddy.” She shook her head back and forth. “It’s my fault.”
“Which is why you’re the one that is going to get a spanking.” I guided her into position over my knee.
Indebted To A Daddy: Once Upon A Daddy Page 11
