by Ashia Monet
Blythe can feel Jay watching for her reaction. She makes sure her words are phrased perfectly. “Something was taking you? Are you serious about this or are you—”
“No, no, that part was real,” he says. “My friend, when I called him back at the house, he was…worried. He thought something had happened to me. And it makes me wonder—about, you know, everything. Because why would these random magicians be interested in me if I wasn’t…if I didn’t play some part in this?” Blythe is quiet, letting him fill in the silence. “I remembered what you said about the Trident Republic, and the war, and what they did to you, and I think…”
Blythe waits for the words, the admittance that he is a Guardian.
“I think I might be a goddamn magician,” he says.
Alright. Baby steps.
Blythe draws herself up straighter. She would take his hand to reassure him, but Jay is still Jay, and she is not convinced that he will understand the gesture platonically. So instead, she simply speaks.
“You already know I think so too. We all do. I mean, it sucks that you just got your magic taken away by the Erasers because of me but…at least you know. And there’s nothing wrong with being a magician. Plenty of people are.”
“I know that. I just didn’t want another reason to not be…” his voice trails off. He stares out at the sea of sky beneath the plane’s wings.
“Not to be what?” Blythe asks.
Jay hesitates, as if the word has lodged in his throat. “Normal.”
Blythe can’t say she understands, because she doesn’t. She was always the new kid, the unknown girl who had to make herself into someone interesting enough for people to enjoy her company.
She is an artist who believes that making an impact, standing out from the crowd, can sometimes be the only thing separating a good creator from a legendary one. “Unique” is something she chose to become.
But here is a person who captivates the attention of anyone who sees him. He is a boy who effortlessly shines like the brightest star in the night sky. And all he wishes to do is fade.
“I’m sorry,” Blythe apologizes. “About everything. I…I know this is all a lot to take in. Especially after what happened to you that night.”
“At this point, that was just another Friday night,” Jay says. When he catches the surprise on her face, he smiles. Except the happiness doesn’t reach his eyes.
“When chaos is constant,” he says. “It starts feeling like comfort.”
Jay flashes his black card and rents a truck large enough to comfortably fit all of them.
Blythe has replaced Cordelia in the passenger seat, since Jay has replaced her in the driver’s, but Cordelia is still their navigator, using the map to Electric City she has constructed on her Zadis.
Jay follows her instructions as best as he can, until they’re driving through the desert with nothing but flat land for miles.
They’ll be in Electric City soon. Blythe bounces her leg against her seat, over and over. Keeping still is a thing of the past.
Jay has retreated into himself, the exact opposite of the extroverted flirt he was this morning. But all it takes is a couple words from Antonio to get him crack a real smile.
Storm makes them crank the AC up to the highest point.
“I’m cold,” Antonio complains.
Storm pops her gum. “And I don’t give a shit.”
“My jacket’s in the back,” Jay says. “You can grab that.”
Antonio throws it on; it’s big on him, and the sleeves swallow his arms. “Aha! Look! You can’t see my hands!”
Caspian appears in the backseat beside Storm, balancing a bowl of Ramen on his lap.
Storm stares at him. He looks right back at her.
“I can share,” he offers.
She makes him travel back to God-knows-where to bring back a second fork, but he does, and they quietly share the bowl while Daniel fights with Cordelia over the radio.
Their gas needle drops lower as day submits to night. It’s all fine until the truck sputters to a stop.
This wouldn’t be a problem, except for the fact that they have no backup containers in the trunk and there isn’t another gas station for miles.
“Wayment,” Storm says. “There are seven of us in this truck. Seven. Did not a single one of us think there could be a possibility we’d need more gas?”
Shame spreads its tendrils through the silence of the car.
“Damn,” Storm sucks her teeth, staring out at the desert. “We deserve to die here.”
Blythe tries to think of a plan. Walking probably isn’t the best idea, but she can’t think of—
“I’ll call my friends,” Jay offers. “They could probably take us the rest of the way.”
“They’d come out to the Nevada desert?” Blythe asks.
“For me?” Jay asks. “Most certainly.”
Antonio raspberries. “My friends leave me on read.”
“I’d never leave you on read, bro,” Jay says.
Antonio grasps his heart. “Bro.”
Jay winks at him, snatching up his phone and hopping out of the car.
The moment the door closes behind him, Storm blurts, “He fucking his friend.”
Daniel looks traumatized just from hearing that.
“Storm!” Blythe shrieks.
“Please don’t say that,” Cordelia whines. “I was already envisioning what colors our wedding reception would be.”
“Girl, you barely even talked to him!” Storm shrieks.
“I’m biding my time!”
When Jay opens the door again, he tells them that his friends agreed, but it’ll take them about an hour to reach their location, even with using the Tempore.
Which means the Guardians have to stay occupied in the middle of the desert for sixty minutes without killing each other.
“We could play twenty questions,” Antonio offers—and is instantaneously shot down.
After a few moment of chit-chat and idle social media scrolling, Daniel opens his car door. “I’m going to take a walk,” he announces. “Anyone is welcome to join me.” He doesn’t wait for anyone to follow. He simply starts off, hands in his pockets.
Everyone stares after him in silence. “Is Daniel…doing something by himself?” Cordelia asks.
Blythe sighs wistfully. “They grow up so fast.”
Storm ends up following him, telling Caspian to join them. Caspian hesitates at first, but Storm does not take no for an answer—“I wasn’t asking,” she says—and off they go.
Blythe makes a mental note to ask one of them what they talked about when they get back. Nosy habits die hard.
“Hey,” Jay says, tapping her on the shoulder. “Let’s go up to the roof.”
A wry smile comes to her face. “Why?”
“Antonio told me you like the stars, how ‘bout you show me some constellations?”
Blythe’s smile grows as a clever idea pops into her head. “Sounds great, yeah, can’t wait—HEY ANTONIO!”
Antonio’s blonde hair flops as he snaps his head up from his phone.
“Come look at the stars with us!” Blythe beckons.
He lights up like a Christmas tree. “Oh heck yeah bro, I love a good bonding session! Cordelia, you come too!”
Blythe smiles sweetly at Jay. “You don’t mind, do you?”
“Of course not,” Jay counters, not missing a beat. “I get to hang out with three of my favorite people.”
He reaches up to the roof and hoists himself up with annoyingly effortless agility.
Antonio hurries after him, leaving Blythe to realize her mistake and sit, quietly, under the heat of Cordelia’s glare.
“Wait,” Blythe says. “Let me explain.”
“I’m a mind reader but go on.”
“See, what had happened was, I thought…I thought I was being clever. Because I was like ooh, he’s trying to flirt with me, let me just get Antonio to like, shut that shit down.”
“Uh huh.”
“But I forgot he was unstoppably bisexual.”
“A powerful thing to be.”
“And he thinks he’s ending up with one of us.”
“Mmm.”
“So, really, I’m the idiot here because I just gave him exactly what he wanted.”
“Of course.”
On top of the truck, beneath the stars, Jay lays on his side, close to where Antonio sits criss-cross-apple-sauce. Cordelia crosses her legs at the ankle, while Blythe kneels to better point out the stars.
Blythe’s always found the night sky comforting. Even with the blinking lights of passing airplanes and clouds that block their vision, the stars still shine brighter without the competition of city lights or smog. Those pockets of light in the darkness warm Blythe’s heart. The night sky just feels like home.
“Alright,” she begins. “So, that one right there is Libra—”
Antonio bounces up. “That’s my Zodiac sign!”
“Oh, that explains a lot,” Blythe says.
Cordelia leans forward, hair swinging over her shoulders. “Where’s Gemini?”
“Ohhhhh, so does that,” Blythe murmurs. “It’s probably not visible right now. There’s—”
“I love Libras,” Jay interrupts.
“Jay, no, fuck off,” Blythe picks up a piece of rock from the bed of the roof and tosses it at him. She is not letting him corrupt Antonio.
“Don’t get jealous,” Jay smirks, swatting the pebble away. “I’m sure I love your sign too.”
“Plot twist, there will be a quiz on these once I’m done explaining them,” Blythe teases. “So keep talking if you want.”
Jay feigns apology, sinking backward. But he can’t hide his smile. “Sorry. I’ll be quiet.”
Blythe points out every constellation she can name. Cordelia is curious about where their names come from, and soon Blythe is dazzling them with her knowledge of constellation lore.
Their celestial discussion lasts so long, they are still deep in conversation when Caspian, Daniel and Storm return.
Storm skates up, throwing her arms into the air. “Y’all really waited until we left to have a party?!”
“Sorry,” Jay says. “This is for cool kids only.”
“I exist outside of both time and space,” Caspian says. “The only thing stopping me from disappearing from where I now stand and reappearing on that roof is my own will.”
Blythe dramatically raises her chin, putting on her bitchiest voice. “That and your obvious lack of Cool Kid Energy.”
Caspian stares at her, stoic and unblinking. “That one hurt.”
Daniel picks with the hem of his sweater, eyes pleading. “Is this cyberbullying?”
They quickly explain that no, this is not cyberbullying, it’s just regular bullying, but they’re just teasing because of course the three of them are welcome to join.
Caspian appears at Blythe’s side instantly, but getting Daniel onto the roof is an elaborate task. The poor boy can not climb, and they try to teach him how to set his hands and pull up to the roof, but he keeps slipping until Jay takes him by the hands and pulls him all the way up.
With everyone comfortably settled, Blythe continues through her lesson of the night sky, stopping at every single star she recognizes. After what feels like forever, she finally runs out.
“I think that’s it…” Blythe’s voice trails off as something catches her eye. Right in front of her. “Wait, no…”
“What?” Cordelia asks.
“It’s…that’s Calyvorra’s Crown,” Blythe says. “It’s my favorite constellation.”
The last time Blythe saw Calyvorra’s Crown, she was stargazing with her family on a picnic blanket with a container of green grapes in her hand.
This is the first time a memory of her family does not burn like liquid fire in her chest. She misses them, of course, and it hurts. But she is almost…comfortable where she is now, here with the Guardians, stranded in the middle of the desert.
“That’s cute, dude,” Antonio smiles. “Why’s it your favorite?”
“It’s made up of seven stars, but…if one of the seven isn’t shining, or if it’s not bright enough for you to see, you’ll miss the whole constellation. And I…”
Blythe’s voice trails off. Why does she like it?
“I always loved that unity, I guess,” she says. “That it’s a circle, without a clear beginning or end or hierarchy. Even though they’re in different positions in the sky, they are equal. And you can only see their true beauty when they are all gathered together.”
She expects someone to make a joke, or for Storm to burst into laughter over the corniness of it all. But she doesn’t. No one says a word.
They sit, together, all seven of them, all Guardians, staring at this constellation, existing together in harmony and silence.
It is getting late. Storm is the first to fall asleep, which makes sense. But the surprise of the century comes when Daniel Quinton himself, the boy who has been too afraid to shut his eyes for even a moment, falls asleep beside her.
One by one, each of them drift off, Cordelia beside Blythe, Jay and Antonio off to the back, still gathered on top of their truck in the middle of the desert.
The only ones awake are Blythe and Caspian, sitting shoulder to shoulder in the soft summer breeze.
Blythe smiles at him. “How was your adventure with Storm and Daniel?”
Caspian is quiet a moment. “Daniel kept to himself. He’s still afraid of me but he’s coming around. And I talked with Storm. She was mad but I think we’re alright now.”
“I think she was just hurt.”
“I don’t blame her.”
“What about you, though? Are you happy you stayed?”
He doesn’t answer. “Yes” is the word he doesn’t want to speak.
“Can I tell you a secret?” he asks instead.
Blythe shimmies excitedly. “I love secrets.”
She expects Caspian to show her something, perhaps. Or speak some truth she never would have guessed about him.
Instead, before Blythe’s eyes, Caspian begins to solidify. His grey pallor becomes pale, living, skin. His black t-shirt becomes cotton instead of air, his messy black hair stills against his forehead.
And his eyes…they shift from ghostly black holes to dark, beautiful irises. The scar in his eyebrow becomes even more visible, a cut right through the tail that could almost be purposeful.
“I’m not dead,” he says. “I just like being a ghost.”
Blythe is absolutely speechless.
“What the fuck?!” she finally yells. “What the FUCK?! You’re ALIVE?! And you’re cute! What the fuck! Why didn’t you ever tell us?!”
Caspian’s face burns pink at the compliment, and he looks away, hiding a bit. “I never told you I was dead, either. My parents are dead. I’m still here. I just figured letting you guys assume would be funnier. And it was.”
“You are so annoying!” Blythe shouts through her laughter.
The sound of her voice must be contagious, because Caspian chews his lip as he stares at the horizon, as if he could hold back the smile that is curling on his face.
It is the first time Blythe has ever, ever seen him smile. Happiness is an emotion she hopes he will wear more often.
“Don’t tell the others,” he adds.
“I won’t. But why? Is it personal?”
“I just want to shock the shit out of them.”
“Of course you do.”
When Caspian falls asleep, Blythe is alone again. Except, not entirely.
Blythe could have run into any number of criminals, of heartless people. The Guardians could have been anyone at all; they could have been selfish, or cruel, or dangerous.
Instead, fate has gifted her with them: Cordelia and Daniel and Antonio and Storm and Caspian and Jay. These beautiful, talented, loving people who are risking everything to travel with her into a war zone. They’ve sacrificed so much just for her.
Bly
the’s eyes burn with tears. She doesn’t want to cry and risk waking one of them up. But Blythe owes them so much. They have given up everything for her, and she would give up anything for them. She owes them her life.
Something sparks on the horizon. Headlights, moving at full speed. Jay’s friends have arrived.
Blythe bangs her fists on the metal roof.
“Wake up!” she announces. “Wake up, get up, they’re here!”
Daniel shoots up, face flushed and curls tangled, squinting. “W-Who’s here?”
“Better be Jake from State Farm because this truck sucks,” Storm mutters, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
A second pair of headlights crescent the horizon. And then another. And then another. Their engines sound more like a buzzing hive. Blythe then realizes that they are not pairs, but singular, individual, motorcycle headlights.
“Uh, Jay…?” Blythe asks. “How many people did you call…?”
Jay blinks awake, squinting through the light that illuminates every inch of his perfect face. He smiles brighter than Blythe has ever seen, leaps off of the truck, and lands perfectly on his feet.
“ROCCO!” he yells.
Storm bolts upright. “Who?!”
The blood drains from Blythe’s face as the Angelus pulls into sight.
Twenty-Three
The Angelus arrives in a crescent curve, their headlights erasing all shadows along the van. Rocco has barely jumped off his bike before Jay tackles him in a hug.
“What the fuck?” Storm whispers.
These men shot at Blythe in Washington, kidnapped Cordelia in Philadelphia, and terrorized Storm, these men with their leather jackets with sharp eyes and bodies hardened by fights, let out a chorus of Jay’s name as if he is their prodigal son.
Rocco holds Jay at arm’s length to scan him up and down. “Christ, Jaybird, where’ve you been?!” he snaps. “We spent days lookin’ for you! I was about to lose my goddamn mind—”
Jay cups Rocco’s face in his hands. “Before you lose your mind, just look at me,” he says. “I’m fine. I told you I was fine.”
Rocco places his hands on top of Jay’s. “Yeah, on the phone after we thought you were fucking dead—”
