Alec took the box and removed the necklace from its place, unlatching the clasp so he could place it around her neck. He knew it was a cheesy present, he’d been aware of that even as he’d bought it, but it had felt like the right thing. It was something that had brought them together, that they would always share. Even if they never managed to have any sort of relationship, friendship or otherwise, going forward nothing could change what they had managed to share.
“There,” he said softly, stepping back once the necklace was clasped shut again. Ramona turned around to face him, reaching up to touch the pendant where it rested against her chest. “It looks good. Literary quotes suit you, Sanders.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Ramona teased, poking him playfully in the shoulder. “I didn’t get you anything, mostly because I didn’t know what to get. I’m sorry about that, I mean you came over here and brought me something great and I don’t have anything to give you back.”
Alec just shrugged, his smile crooked but genuine as it crept over his lips. “Don’t worry about it. I don’t want anything in return. I just wanted to come over to see you, and to say that I’m sorry. I should be getting back though; I have to help my mom start dinner. If I leave her to do it on her own we’ll end up eating at the diner like we did last year, and believe me, nobody wants to repeat that experience.”
Ramona moved forward then, wrapping Alec into a tight hug. She took a moment just to breathe him in, having missed his familiar scent almost as much as his presence. It was so good to have him back in her life, to know that he didn’t want to shut her out for her rejection.’
“Hey,” she told him then, eyes lighting up. “Are you going to the new year party at the high school? My whole family always goes, and I’m always bored to tears chasing my siblings around. If you’re going too maybe we can hang out? It would be a lot less dull with you there.”
In all honesty, Alec had never set foot at the New Year’s Eve party. He had heard of it of course, and it was apparently a town tradition. It was hosted by the high school in the gymnasium, and local businesses all gave to the effort. There were beverages, snacks, dancing, and even games for the little kids. It was a place for everyone in town to go to celebrate, since odds were that nobody could get out of town to go anywhere else. He had always spent the evening at home, eating junk food and watching Ryan Seacrest ruin the sanctity of Rockin’ New Year’s Eve, but he found himself having a change of heart.
“I wouldn’t miss it,” he assured her, giving her one last smile. “I’ll see you there, Sanders, and you owe me at least one dance. You know, on principle.” Ramona laughed and rolled her eyes in a playful way, walking Alec to the door. She watched as he trudged back through the snow and climbed into the SUV, and she stayed there watching until he had disappeared back around the bend. She touched the necklace again and sighed, shutting the door to keep the cold out.
Chapter Twenty-Two: A Brand New Year
December 31st started out like any other day of the year, only with the hint of something more on the air. Ramona Sanders didn’t normally get worked up over the eve of the New Year, but today she just felt different. Maybe it was the prospect of going out and participating in something for a change, an act she had not committed since the ill-fated basketball game. She had no doubt that that was at least part of it anyway, as she was constantly shifting between excitement and dread.
Another part was likely the fact that she would be seeing Alec, who she had not laid eyes on in person since Christmas day. They had talked a few times on the phone, but the weather and a hint of awkwardness still lingering between them kept them from managing to meet up. Until tonight, anyway, when they would be meeting at the doors to the gym at exactly nine o’clock on the nose.
Ramona felt jittery, bouncing all over the house since she couldn’t seem to make herself be still. When she’d had all of the pacing she could handle she tried to settle in with a book, but her nervous energy dictated that reading was not on the agenda. So in the end she began to raid her closet, trying to find something nice to wear. Some people dressed up for the party, while others went casual. She had already decided she wanted to look nicer than normal, laying all her best clothes out on the bed.
By seven that night she had decided on a black dress with long lace sleeves over a pair of gold leggings. She didn’t do high heels; she didn’t have the coordination for such things, so she found a pair of black flats that would work with the outfit just fine. She took a shower and scrubbed her skin pink, applying mousse to her curly hair while it was still nice and damp in an effort to tame it at least a little. She wasn’t a makeup girl either, but tonight she did succumb to both mascara and lip gloss, just to enhance her features a little.
All this for a guy she wasn’t even interested in going out with. That was Ramona’s thought as she put on her leggings, making a face at herself. Why was she so worried about how she looked? Even if she didn’t dress up it wasn’t like Alec was going to care, because she wasn’t the dress up type and he knew it. For a moment she considered pulling on jeans instead, but finally decided to finish slipping on the leggings. A new year meant a new start, and she was just as capable of starting over as anyone else was.
It took them right up until ten to nine to get everyone ready and loaded into the van. The main roads had been cleared off, but they still had to navigate their rural route with extra caution. Finally they arrived that the high school, able to find a parking spot in the very back of the lot. It seemed as though the entire town had turned out and that they all wanted to be on time, people heading in small groups toward the gymnasium doors.
Ramona held the hands of two of her younger siblings as they walked, not wanting to lose anyone in the crowds. When they reached the awning that covered the front of the gym, however, she began to scope out Alec. It didn’t take her long to find him, a little taller than most of the crowd, with that unmistakable head of dark hair. He was wearing a casual suit that had obviously been tailored to fit his build, idly playing with his car keys while he waited. He looked up when he felt Ramona looking at him though, their eyes meeting and his mouth quirking into a smile.
“Here,” her mother whispered close to her ear, breaking the enchantment of the moment. “We’ll head on inside. You two have fun, and meet us right back here at a quarter after twelve if we don’t find you before then. See you inside.”
Her siblings let go of her hands and headed off inside the gym, a burst of warm air hitting her as the doors were pulled open. She turned her attention back to Alec, looking sheepish as she made her way over
“Of all the gin joints, in all the world,” she joked, fiddling with the buttons on her coat. She felt nervous still, like she suddenly didn’t know what to do. She had spent weeks with Alec, and she’d been strong willed enough to think of her own best interests and reject his offer to go to the dance. So why was she all fluttery and messed up about it now?
“Want to go in?” Alec asked her, moving to open the door for her. “It’s pretty cold out here. I also hear that you have to hit the snack table early, or it gets picked over. I personally do not want to be left with the option of nothing but cucumber sandwiches.”
Ramona exhaled a deep breath and nodded in agreement, slipping inside with him. The gym had been decorated, and it was so cheesy it hurt in a good sort of way. They had hung up a disco ball, and though it rotated slowly nobody had kicked down the main lights so you couldn’t even really tell it was there unless you looked up. A giant 2018 sign had been hung on one of the far walls, an homage to the year that lay just hours ahead of them. Food tables were lined up in front of the stage, where the local radio DJ was spinning canned music out of small speakers. There was plenty of punch and all sorts of food, courtesy of everyone’s favorite local establishments.
They shed their coats first, leaving them with an older gentleman who was manning the janitor’s closet that, for tonight, was the coat closet instead. He gave them each a noise maker in exchange for their effort
s, which Alec put into his pocket for later. They headed first toward the food, picking out the best finger sandwiches and some other snacks before finding a spot to sit on the bleachers. They balanced paper plates on their knees and sipped punch from little plastic cups, watching the people of their small town mingle and laugh.
“You look really great tonight,” Alec complimented her then, sneaking a little sideways look. “Black and gold, very classic and classy. I like it a lot.”
Ramona’s cheeks darkened to pink as she picked up a chicken salad sandwich, glancing over at him in the same fashion. “You look pretty good yourself, I must say. Davis boys clean up nicely. Speaking of, Bryson isn’t here with you tonight?”
Alec looked around and then pointed down onto the gym floor, where his little brother was dancing wildly with a group of friends from school. They were mostly members of the computer club, and it made Alec pleased to see him having such a good time. Ever since he had broken his ankle their father hadn’t brought up an impending return to the basketball team, and they were both thankful for that. If they were lucky the subject would be dropped permanently and Bryson could go on doing what he loved to do, without being forced into something he hated just because someone else willed it.
Once their plates were empty they made a circuit of the gym, greeting teachers and parents who were in attendance. When they passed by Cameron, who was holding hands with Casey and telling a tall tale about his supposed sports feats, they didn’t so much as look in Alec and Ramona’s direction. His fingers still felt a little stiff from their fight, but he was over it and it seemed as though Cameron was at least willing to let it go now.
“So I heard from one of the schools that are trying to recruit me,” Alec told her, passing beneath one of the basketball goals. “They’re in Oregon, and they’re willing to offer me a scholarship if I sign on to play. I’m going to try and wait it out, see if any other offers come through, but it looks like I’m poised to get out of here one way or another.”
That took Ramona a little bit off guard, though she wasn’t entirely sure why. Since she had known Alec he had talked about leaving Rust, and a basketball scholarship had been his sure fire ticket to ride. Hearing him say it though, putting a name like Oregon to the place he might end up, was entirely different. When she spoke of leaving Rust she more or less meant going to school in Butte, Billings, or maybe potentially Helena. If she was lucky she could get a scholarship to cover enough of the in-state tuition to make it possible, but going anywhere out of Montana was not a real possibility. Or, at least, it wasn’t a real possibility for her.
“Oregon, huh? That’s amazing, Alec. It’s what you wanted, right? You’ll get to play ball, go to school, live in a place that might actually have its own movie theater,” Ramona smiled, hiding the feelings that were bubbling up inside of her. She wanted to ask him not to go so far away, that distance wouldn’t cure everything that was wrong in his life, but she couldn’t do that. He wasn’t made for a place like Rust, or even a place like Montana. He didn’t want wide open skies and endless wheat, and he never had. He wanted something faster, something more constricting. He wanted a place that seemed less terrifying than the middle of nowhere, and she could not begrudge him that.
Overhead the lights finally dimmed, and somebody turned on the disco ball. It spun a little bit faster, a color shifting spotlight bouncing off of it. Bright colored orbs of light reflected off the gym walls, the floor, and them. The DJ put on something slower, more intimate, and couples began to move in closer. Ramona saw her own parents wrapped up tightly in one another’s arms, her brothers and sisters swaying nearby in a circle, holding hands and trying not to giggle. She spotted Bryson, who had the same dark hair as his older brother, dancing with a girl with long red hair that was woven into a pretty braid.
She could have stood and watched forever, but Alec tugging gently on the sleeve of her dress brought reality back into focus. He held out his hand to her and she took it, letting him lead her out onto the dance floor. They pushed between the other people until they found a spot he deemed acceptable, and then he pulled her in close. It was easier than Ramona imagined to just give into it, to lay her head on Alec’s shoulder and slid her arms around his waist. His chest rose and fell with his breathing, and she could feel his heart beating about as hard and fast as hers was. It felt right, it felt good, and it was even better after Alec put his arms around her and hugged her in tight.
She should have gone with him to the dance. In hindsight, Ramona was aware that she had made a mistake. She hadn’t wanted to let herself get involved, to get wrapped up in something that would distract her from the other things she deemed important. She had not figured herself into the equation though, and it hurt to finally pick up on that. School, her siblings, chores, the farm, it had all felt so much bigger than everything else she had going. She had put those things before herself, before her own wants, for so long that it had been natural to just continue doing it.
Ramona had wanted to make everyone else happy, and had left her own happiness behind. It couldn’t be changed, at least in the sense that she could not go back and get a do over on what she had already broken. She could, however, change things going forward and she decided quietly to make that her new year’s resolution. She would try to start putting herself first more, because she was just as important as everything else.
“I should have gone to that dance with you,” she admitted quietly, sighing a little as she lifted her head to properly look at him. “It was stupid and arrogant of me to say no, and I did nothing but manage to hurt both of us. If I could take it back I would, but I can’t. So can we just start over?”
Alec gave her a gentle little smile then, leaning in to kiss her very softly on the forehead. He was quiet for so long that it made her nervous, but he finally spoke and when he did his voice was soft and considerate.
“I don’t think we need to start over,” he told her, resting his forehead against hers now. “I think that things are fine the way they are, and that we just need to enjoy what’s happening right here, right now. Whatever happened before doesn’t matter, it’s in the past and we should leave it there. I want to be with you now, tonight, and you said yes this time and that’s the answer that counts. So don’t be sorry, and don’t worry about a do-over. Let’s just be happy for a little while.”
Ramona didn’t argue or press the point further. Instead she snuggled closer into him, her fingers curling into his shirt where her hands rested against his back. They danced through a fast song and then another slow one, they drank more punch, and then she twirled around the floor with Bryson. The three of them stood together in a huddle and laughed about other people’s dance moves, and then they shared their resolutions. As midnight approached Bryson took off to find the girl he’d been dancing with earlier in the night, and the two of them slipped outside for some air.
The night was cold but clear for a change, the winter constellations lighting up the sky. They pointed out the ones they knew, and speculated over the ones that they didn’t. Ramona shivered and Alec wrapped his arm around her shoulders, leaning back against the brick wall. Inside they could hear everyone shouting out the countdown, and Ramona closed her eyes. The entire group screamed on in unison, and then came a cacophony of sound as they began to blow on the little noise makers that had been handed out. When Alec spoke his voice was in her ear and his breath tickled the skin of her neck, making her shiver.
“Happy new year,” he whispered softly, placing a kiss beneath her ear.
Ramona turned her head and pressed her lips to his, opening her eyes so she could look at him. How had she gotten here? It baffled her, and left her without any real answers. She had gone from hating a boy she didn’t even know, to kissing him under the night sky on the first day of a brand new year. It was so surreal and strange, and it made her heart ache in the best way possible.
They broke apart when party goers began to slip out of the gym, both of them fighting to compose thems
elves. Alec hurried inside to get their jackets, returning with them just as Ramona’s family appeared. They tugged on their coats and trailed after her parents and siblings, back to the van that sat in the back of the lot. While her mother was busy buckling in the little kids and her father warmed up the vehicle they stood together, very gently touching hands.
“This was a really great night,” Alec confessed to her, eyes shining a bit. “Best I’ve had in a really long time. It wouldn’t have been the same at all without you, Ramona. I needed this, and I needed you to be here with me.”
Ramona blushed and gave him a shy smile, scuffing her shoe against the slippery pavement. “It was my pleasure,” she told him, leaning up to kiss his cheek. Her mother was calling to her now, everyone ready to get home and into bed. “I’ll see you soon?”
Alec looked a bit pained then but he nodded, raising a hand to wave as she started to climb into the van. “You’ll see me,” he nodded, watching as the door slid shut. The van pulled out and lurched through the parking lot, vanishing into the line of vehicles struggling to get out.
He finally headed for the SUV where Bryson was waiting, and the two of them headed back home. Neither brother spoke, just sat in companionable silence as they followed the rest of the town away from the high school and back into the real world. It had been a good night, the best night, and Alec tried his best to hold onto that as they wove through the dark, which seemed to go on for forever.
Chapter Twenty-Three: The Right to Remain Silent
Early in the morning on January first Ramona Sanders received a text from Alec Davis, as unassuming as any text could be. It was a simple I miss you with a sad face emoji, to which she responded just after noon when she finally woke up and rolled out of bed. The text went unanswered but she didn’t feel upset about the fact. It was New Year’s Day, they had all been up late, and most people had plans of some kind on the first day of the brand new year.
A Crooked Mile (Rust Book 1) Page 18
