“You can stay with us, Cami,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck and showcasing his sleeve of tattoos. “Seriously, we have a couch, and it’d only be for what? A few weeks?”
“Two months,” Freddie said, walking by us and not daring to spare me a glance. “I take it the couch-option is only available for siblings?”
“Dude, you wouldn’t fit on the thing. Plus, couldn’t you stay with your brother?”
Freddie stopped, spinning around and making eye contact with me. It was unnerving to be on the end of his full stare, and I hated how I was covered in sweat. I looked like a sweaty opossum, and he was… perfect. Gray shirt that hugged his pecs and black jeans that led to white chucks. He rocked the nerd-chic thing really, really well.
He cleared his throat, his gaze turning to ice as a light blush covered his cheeks. “I would kill him. We learned early on we weren’t meant to share a living space.”
“Then Ledger Hall, it is.” Michael clapped and grinned at us. “You’ll be dorm buddies. How cute.” He reached down and picked up two of my bags, his smiling dropping. “Did you walk here with these?”
“Yes.”
Freddie tensed his jaw and moved his eyes from me to the bags. “I’m going to talk to the R.A. Thanks for the ride, Reiner.”
“You got it.” Michael held out a fist to him then faced me. “Seriously, any time you need an escape, come over.”
“And ruin y’alls honeymoon period of living together? I wouldn’t do that.” He had no idea that his offer and genuine words meant the fucking world to me. I was judged constantly, but Michael never stereotyped me or made me feel inferior. He was a wonderful human. Naomi was lucky. “Thanks though, really.”
He nodded and dropped my bags off at the end of the dorm hall before heading back toward his car. I went to find the R.A. Might as well discover what room was mine before hauling all of it somewhere. My footsteps felt like weights as I padded through the stifling hallway to see Freddie walking my way with a key in his hands. Our gazes locked for a beat, but before I could decipher what his look meant, he glanced at the ground, like the boring brown and white tile was better than my face.
“Maybe we’ll be neighbors, Freddie. Could you imagine all the fun we’d have?” I said, unable to stop goading him, just to see if he’d ever smile at me again.
I wanted to break through the anti-Cami shell he wore like armor. Silence greeted me like I figured it would, so I went to meet our R.A. to get my card. 5G was my room. Right in the center. I made the joke that I better have good cell service, but Betty the R.A. didn’t think I was cute.
I could only imagine how well she and Freddie would get along. I went to my room and opened it just as Freddie walked back into the dorm and headed to the door right next to mine. What a fucking day. I wasn’t the captain of the dance team, and I wasn’t living in my dream apartment. I shared a wall with a guy who hated my damn guts.
Senior year was not starting off with a bang. It was my own version of hell, and I didn’t know how I was gonna survive.
CHAPTER
TWO
Freddie
The dull buzz of my phone going off had me plopping onto the twin bed to answer my brother’s Facetime call. “Oh, convenient that you’re free now after I’m moved in,” I said, narrowing my eyes at Camden. One of his talents was always disappearing when anyone needed him. At least when it came to anything physical. Emotionally? He’d be here with ten pints of ice cream and a notepad to make a list of who he was going to hurt.
Cleaning the kitchen as kids? He’d have something come up that couldn’t be avoided. Yardwork when our mom asked for help? Same thing.
He responded to my jab with a sheepish grin. “I wanna see the place. Give me the tour, Freds.”
Freds. The terrible nickname he coined a decade ago. It was a combo of that and FB3. Either one made me sound like a tool. He swore it was endearment, but I always saw the glint in his eyes. He enjoyed my suffering. He really had the whole youngest child syndrome down pat.
“You could actually walk here and see it.” I sighed, eyeing my living space for the next two months. It was roughly the same size as my closet in the new apartment I was supposed to be staying in. Not ideal. Not awesome. My back muscles clenched with tension about the damn heat already suffocating me, but it wouldn’t help to panic. The size of the bed alone was worrying, but I tried to not think of the negatives. “But let me guess, you have a pressing appointment.”
“Sensing a tone, Freds. Don’t be pissed at me that you’ve had some shit luck the last year and two months.” Camden grinned, as if it was funny my life had been a string of bad luck. He wasn’t wrong, but he didn’t have to look like he enjoyed it so much. “Stop being shy. Show me the abode. I promise to only laugh twice.”
I panned around the room, making sure he got the full extent of the place. The bed, the built-in two drawer dresser, and the desk that was way too small for me. “This is so weird. I’m twenty-four and living in a dorm.”
His eyes bugged out, like I’d personally offended him. “I offered my place, like the amazing younger brother you’ve always had. It was so kind of me, honestly.”
“Which we both know was a pity invite.” I flipped the phone to face me again. “Did you legit call to see my new place?”
“Yeppers. Legit the only reason.” He shrugged and looked off into the distance. “Oh, I gotta go. Roommate needs an extra set of hands with groceries.”
“So, you do help others, just not your family.”
“Food first, family second.” Camden hung up, but I caught the smirk on his face. Brothers. He was the easygoing one and had too much charisma. He’d charm the wallpaper right off the drywall if given the chance while I preferred to hang out solo. It was like all of the extroverted genes skipped me and went to him. Some days, it bothered me how easy it was for him to talk to anybody. Other days, he annoyed me because he never shut up. But most of the time, I was thankful we were close.
Just… not close enough to live together.
He was chaotic where I had a plan. He had endless parties and people over, where I preferred silence. Salt and pepper, positive and negative. We were opposites in every sense of the word. Speaking of plans… I opened my backpack and started taking out highlighters, notebooks, and my laptop to get them all set up. Even after that small of a task, my shirt stuck to my back from sweat, so I propped open the door to the hall. The constant movement of people would distract me, but it was a small price to pay to escape the stifling heat.
A deep voice and a sexy laugh caught my attention, and my muscles clenched. Her. The guy said something, the tail end of the conversation heading into my room. Cami responded with another giggle.
Awesome. Just, fucking awesome. Here she was, flirting with guys on the floor already, not having been there an hour even. And next door to me, no less. I really did have shitty luck. It was the universe laughing at me for thinking someone like her would be interested in me that one night. For believing I had a shot with her. It was a joke, and the shame from that night made my mouth dry up.
I could count on one hand the number of people who had the unique talent of flustering me. Cami Simpson was one of them. Kate Beckinsale was on that list because my god, she was my dream woman, but in real life… it was just Cami. My palms sweated, my stomach somersaulted, and I turned into a blob. A thoughtless blob who couldn’t even speak to her. Even when we were outside with Michael, she stood there, and it should’ve been easy to say something. Anything! But nope. I got awkward, my thoughts crisscrossed, and a whole lot of nothing came out. Images of her touching me that night and her teasing smile that made my heart beat twice as fast clashed with the memory of her leaving with someone else.
A year later, the embarrassment was just as fresh.
My ears heated like I’d sat out in the sun for too long, and I ran a hand over my hair before adjusting my glasses on my nose. Cami defined the word stunning. If someone handed me a catalogue to create my pe
rfect woman, it was her. Her wavy dark hair, her large brown eyes, her full, always red lips, and her toned body. I bit the tip of my knuckle, picturing her in her shorts and cut off shirt.
She was strong and worked on every muscle and moved with such grace that it was hard not to stare at her all the time. Even when I saw her across the quad or at a bar, I avoided her. For two reasons. The first—she flustered me. The second… the ever-present embarrassment.
I couldn’t look at her and not think about that night a year ago. Fuck. My face flushed, and I wiped my hands on the back of my jeans. Living next to her was going to be a special, Freddie-made version of hell. The party girl. The popular girl. The girl who’d flirted with me and left with another guy, crushing my confidence after I’d spent months trying to get it back. I’d foolishly thought for a moment that we had something between us. We clearly didn’t, and I should’ve known better. I had my heart broken once by someone like her, and I had no plans to repeat myself. My future as an environmental engineer wasn’t sexy enough, and I was living proof that nice guys finished last.
Ask my ex-girlfriend. She’d tell you. She up and left me because I was too boring, too simple, too…sweet. The stress grew in my chest, and I rubbed a hand over my heart.
Having a knot there wouldn’t do well with the new arrangements, and I focused on some deep breathing to try and ease it. The exercise didn’t help since it was one million degrees outside, so I stepped into the hallway to see if it was any cooler.
It wasn’t. But something struck me.
I didn’t hear anything next door, which was weird. Cami was loud. Her laugh, her voice, her body. The entire time she’d been here, music carried toward my room, but now it was gone. Why? Where was that guy?
Don’t do it. Don’t look. The co-ed restrooms were just past her door, and I could try and see if she was in her room. If not, she’d left the door open, and that wasn’t smart. There. It was a safety check. Michael would want me to make sure his girlfriend’s twin sister wasn’t getting robbed. Sure, yeah, okay. It has nothing to do with your crush.
Unrequited crush, my brain hollered back at me, putting me right in my place.
Content with my almost genuine rationale, I walked by with the appearance of heading to the restroom when I snuck a glance into her room.
She sat on the floor, her legs crisscrossed, with an empty gaze. The image counteracted any preconceived notions I had of her, and I stopped and stared at her unmoving form. Her eyes were sad, and her red lips were flat in a line as she tapped her fingers in a rhythmic pattern on her arm.
She didn’t wear headphones, and I couldn’t hear any music playing, but it was mesmerizing to see her so still and quiet. The sunlight streamed from her window, reflecting off her belly button ring and showcasing the glistening sweat on her skin. Perfection. She was gorgeous, and a burst of lust made my stomach clench. Shit. I gulped, and she snapped her head in my direction.
Within that millisecond, the sadness evaporated from her face, and she twisted those lips into a smile. “Oh, are you here to tell me how happy you are that we’re neighbors?”
“What? No,” I stammered, taking a step back. Having her full focus was a lot to handle, and it made my thoughts jumble together. I swore she could see into my mind. “You didn’t close your door,” I said, sounding like a damn robot.
This is why guys like me don’t talk to girls like her.
“Why would I do that? I’m still in here.” She pushed herself up and put her hands on her very trim hips. I appreciated muscles on anyone because it took work, but my mouth almost watered at the sight of her stomach. So toned and tan. She was different than me, all extra-large limbs and no coordination.
I forced myself to stare at her brown eyes and not her skin. “You were quiet, and that’s not you,” I said, appalled at how direct I was. It had to be the damn temperature making me this way. I didn’t have the body to enjoy the heat.
“Oh,” she said, her tone getting low and dangerous. “So, you think you know me?” She cocked one hip out and rested one foot on the other, reminding me very clearly that she was a dancer. I couldn’t stand like that if I wanted to.
Shut your mouth. Don’t answer. My brain shouted, but my mouth didn’t care. Thoughts of that night came back, the same hurt and embarrassment causing me to lash out. The way she smiled at me before she left with another guy. The promise to meet up with me later just a joke, a tease. The hurt made my stomach twist like a pretzel, uncomfortable and painful.
“I know enough. I hear enough.” My face burned red, and I regretted stopping by her door. It was pointless. We could never be friends and certainly never more. She was popular, and I was a dork. I was way too boring for her, and what was I doing? Rationalizing why I couldn’t be with her? Jesus. I didn’t even want that. Yes, she was beautiful, but that was it. If I’d learned anything from Madelyn, my ex, it was that I learned, the hard way, the type of partner I wanted.
Stable, reliable, safe. The complete opposite of Cami Simpson.
I shook my head, ignoring the angry look on Cami’s face, and returned to my task—which was pretending to use the bathroom.
I went through the swinging door, the familiar smells of soap and cleaner greeting me. It reminded me of freshmen year, and a wave of nostalgia hit me. I’d be moving after this year. Six years at Central State and then adulthood.
What a trip.
I barely got two steps into the bathroom before a girl screamed at me. Bloody murder type of scream, not a cute one. She clutched a towel over her chest, her face turning bright red. “Get OUT! RIGHT NOW! GET OUT!”
My heart leapt in my throat, and I slammed an arm over my eyes, trying to retreat only to have small hands press into my back.
“What the hell is going on?” Cami’s voice penetrated my overstimulated brain.
“I don’t… she started yelling.” I stood in the hallway now. The narrow hallway with Cami just a foot away from me and my brain absolutely spiraling. The girl had yelled at me… screamed… what the fuck?
She furrowed her brows as she frowned at the door for a beat. Her top lip pursed up, and she wet it with her tongue before she snapped her fingers. “Ah, my guess is she’s like us—just got put here and didn’t realize the bathrooms aren’t gendered.”
“I didn’t intend to scare anyone. I know I’m a pretty big dude, but still.” I blinked a few times, willing my accelerated heart rate to return to normal. The chick had let out a high-pitched wail like I was about to kill her.
“Pretty big? Nah, you’re massive, Freddie.” She gave me a half-smile, and I hated how my name sounded from her lips. Seductive, teasing, like she was flirting with me. Which… she’d called me massive.
That wasn’t necessarily a compliment, and she definitely wasn’t flirting. No way. Not with me of all people. Cami liked athletes, frat presidents--the guys who didn’t sweat in her presence.
I slouched my shoulders to seem shorter, swallowed hard, and tensed when Cami took a step toward me. Her petite frame came up to my shoulder.
“I’ll go talk to her and settle her down. Possibly assure her you’re not a murderer. It’ll go great, trust me.” She sighed like I annoyed her and walked by me. I didn’t move out of the way, causing her side to brush my arm, and I sucked in a breath. She smelled like peaches and vanilla.
Two of my favorite flavors.
The shared bathroom didn’t bother me at all, but I wanted to be mindful if others were nervous. I was a large guy, and that could be intimidating as hell. Bathrooms should be a safe space for everyone. But what could I do? Knock? Put up a sign? I scratched my head as the seconds went by and Cami still hadn’t come out.
I wasn’t sure how to proceed.
Wait here? Go back to my room? Go in there?
What if I actually had to use the bathroom?
Luckily, I didn’t have to answer my snowballing questions because Cami came out with a smirk. I didn’t like the twinkle in her eye or the way she let her gaze li
nger on my chest and arms. My simple blue shirt wasn’t special, but the way she stared at me was sinful. How did this five-foot and change girl have the superpower to make everything she did dirty? And I knew better than to assume she meant anything by it. She was a tease—something I very much learned last year.
“Well, she’s calmed down. She had no idea it was a shared bathroom.”
“That was clear.” I glanced at the door, ready to bolt if the girl walked out. “I’ll knock or announce my presence next time.”
“Lord Brady the Third entering the washroom facilities,” she said in a horrible English accent. She laughed at herself before the tips of her ears reddened.
For whatever reason, seeing that blush made me almost smile. Our gazes met for a brief second, her leftover laugh and my smile colliding, and what the fuck was I doing? I broke eye contact, took a large step away from her, and walked toward my room. I needed space. To be alone. To settle down from the screaming girl and the aggressive attraction I had for my neighbor. To focus on my final year before choosing an internship and career and a city to settle down in…plus…Maddie’s last message weighed on me.
No, don’t think about her now.
“Um, bye? You’re welcome for helping you? For fuck’s sake,” Cami said, attitude shooting out with each syllable.
My gut tightened because she was right. But for the life of me, I couldn’t turn around and look at her again. She made me think stupid things, and it was better to avoid them. Instead, I waved a hand in the air in thanks and hoped that was enough.
“Whatever, asshole.”
I went back into my room, leaving the door open as I fell onto the shitty twin mattress. It squeaked under my weight, and my room felt like a microwave, but it was better than being in the hall or around her.
All this drama because I’d wanted to see why Cami Simpson was quiet. This couldn’t happen again. I pushed up from the bed, deciding to head to my brother’s place to use their pool. I was almost to the point I’d sell my soul to cool off. It had nothing to do with my attraction to Cami. I was ninety-percent sure of it. That girl had trouble written all over her, and I needed to stay the hell away. She could break my already-battered heart with one blink of her long eyelashes, and she totally knew it too.
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