With that, the four Jacks picked the Joker up and placed him on one of the tables. He lay back, resting his head in his hands. He bent one of his legs over the other, and in this position he delivered a long speech. The dwarfs in the great hall flocked around him.
‘I was the very last one to come to this village,’ he began, ‘and everyone knows I am different from you all. That’s why I have kept mostly to myself.’
Something suddenly made all the dwarfs listen to what the Joker had to say. No doubt they had often wondered why he was so different.
‘I don’t belong anywhere,’ he went on. ‘I am neither a heart, a diamond, a club, nor a spade. I am neither a King, a Jack, an Eight, nor an Ace. As I am here – I am merely the Joker, and who that is I have had to find out for myself. Every time I toss my head, the jingling bells remind me that I have no family. I have no number – and no trade either. I cannot share the diamonds’ art of glassblowing, or the hearts’ ability to bake. I haven’t got green fingers like the clubs or muscle power like the spades. I have gone around observing your activities from the outside. Because of this I have also been able to see things to which you have been blind.’
The Joker lay on the table wagging his leg as he spoke, his bells tinkling softly.
‘Every morning you have gone to work, but you have never been fully awake. Of course, you have seen the sun and the moon, the stars in the sky, and everything that moves, but you haven’t really seen it at all. It is different for the Joker, because he was put into this world with a flaw: he sees too deeply and too much.’
At this point the Queen of Diamonds broke in: ‘Spit it out, then, you fool! If you have seen something we haven’t then you must tell us at once.’
‘I have seen myself.’ declared the Joker. ‘I have seen how I crawl in between the bushes and trees in the large garden.’
‘Can you see yourself from the air?’ piped the Two of Hearts. ‘Have your eyes got wings to fly like the birds?’
‘In a way, yes. You see, it’s no good gazing at yourself in a tiny mirror you pull out of your pocket – like the four Queens in the village always do. They are so preoccupied with how they look, they don’t even realise that they are living.’
‘I have never heard anything so cheeky,’ the Queen of Diamonds blurted out. ‘How long is this fool going to be allowed to rant and rave?’
‘These aren’t just words,’ continued the Joker. ‘I feel it deep inside. I feel I am a shape bursting … bursting with life … a remarkable being … with skin, hair, nails, and everything … a wideawake living puppet … graspable like rubber … Joker asks, Where does this rubber man come from?’
‘Are we just going to let him go on?’ the King of Spades interrupted. The King of Hearts nodded his assent.
‘We’re alive!’ the Joker now announced, and threw out his arms so his bells jangled wildly. ‘We are living in a mystical fairy tale beneath the heavens. Odd, says Joker, and is forever pinching himself to make sure it is true.’
‘Does it hurt?’ the Three of Hearts twittered.
‘Every single time a bell rings I realise that I exist – and that happens every time I make the slightest movement.’
He lifted his arm and shook it violently, and several of the dwarfs stepped back in fright.
The King of Hearts cleared his throat and said, ‘Do you know where the rubber man comes from?’
‘You have guessed that riddle for yourselves, but only tiny pieces have been understood. Because you have only a tiny grain of sense, you have to stick your heads together to think the very simplest of thoughts. The reason for this is that you have drunk too much Rainbow Fizz. Joker says he is a mysterious puppet – and you are just as mysterious as he, only you don’t see it. You don’t feel it either, because when you drink Rainbow Fizz, you can taste only honey, lavender, kurberry, ringroot, and gramine. You have become one with the garden without realising you exist, for the one who has the whole world in his mouth forgets that he has a mouth. And he who has all the flavours of the world in his arms and legs forgets he is a mysterious puppet. Joker has always tried to tell the truth, but you have had no ears to listen to him. Indeed, you have had folds of skin on the sides of your faces, but the passages have been blocked with apples, pears, strawberries, and bananas. The same goes for your vision. Naturally you have eyes to see, but what good are they when you are constantly searching for more to drink? Joker says this is so, because only the Joker knows the truth.’
The dwarfs in the hall looked at each other.
‘Where does the rubber man come from?’ the King of Hearts reiterated.
‘We are figments of Frode’s imagination,’ said the Joker, flinging out his arms again. ‘But one day the images were so vivid they started to spurt out of his head. Impossible! cries the Joker, as impossible as the sun and the moon, he says – but the sun and the moon are also true.’
The dwarfs stared at Frode in amazement, and the old man gripped my wrist tightly.
‘But there is even more,’ the Joker went on, ‘for who is Frode? He, too, is an odd puppet full of life. He was the only one on the island, but in reality he belongs to another pack. Nobody knows how many cards there are in that pack, or knows who is dealing them out. The Joker knows only one thing: Frode also is a puppet who appeared out of thin air one morning, bursting with life. Which forehead did he spring from, the Joker wants to know, and he will ask and ask – until one day he finally gets an answer.’
Now it was as though the dwarfs started to stir from a long hibernation. The Two and Three of Hearts each found a broom and began sweeping the floor.
The four Kings huddled together in a tight circle, with their arms around each other. They stood like this, talking in hushed voices, until the King of Hearts turned towards the Joker and announced: ‘It is with great sorrow that the village Kings have agreed the little fool is speaking the truth.’
‘And why is the fact he is speaking the truth so sorrowful?’ the Joker asked. He was still lying on the table, but now he rolled onto his side, and leaning on his arm, he looked up at the King of Hearts.
This time the King of Diamonds spoke: ‘It is terribly sad that the Joker has told us the truth, because it means the master must die.’
‘And why must the master die?’ the Joker enquired. ‘One should always refer to a rule before striking.’
The King of Clubs replied, ‘If Frode walks around the village, he will constantly remind us that we are artificial. Therefore, he must die under the swords of the Jacks.’
The Joker now climbed down from the table. He pointed at Frode and then turned to the Kings and said, ‘It is never a very good idea that master and creation live too close to one another, because they very easily get on each other’s nerves. However, Frode can hardly be blamed for having such a vivid imagination that in the end his fantasies start to spurt out of his head.’
The King of Clubs straightened his miniature crown and said, ‘Everyone is free to fantasise about what he likes, but it is also his duty to make his fantasies aware of the fact that they are just fantasy. Otherwise, he is making fun of them, and then they are entitled to kill him.’
The sun disappeared behind a large cloud, and the hall immediately became much darker.
‘Did you hear what we said, Jacks?’ the King of Spades barked. ‘Off with the master’s head!’
I jumped from my chair, but at the same time the Jack of Spades said, ‘It isn’t necessary, Your Highness, the master is already dead.’
I spun around and saw Frode lying lifeless on the floor. It was not the first time I had seen a dead person and I knew that Frode would never look at me with his sparkling eyes again.
I felt as lost and forlorn as anyone can be. All at once I was alone on the island. A living pack of cards surrounded me, but not one of them was a person like me.
The dwarfs crowded around Frode. Their faces were empty of expression – even more so than when I had arrived in the village the day before.
‘Now we can stand on our own feet,’ the Joker finally declared. ‘Frode is dead, and his creations have murdered him.’
I was so sad and also so angry that I strode over to the Joker, picked him up, and shook him in the air so that his bells jangled noisily.
‘You were the one who murdered him,’ I cried. ‘You were the one who stole the Rainbow Fizz from Frode’s cabin, and you were the one who gave away the knowledge of Frode’s playing cards.’
I let go of him, and the King of Spades now declared, ‘Our guest is correct, therefore we have the right to chop off the little fool’s head. We’ll never be rid of the one who made fools of us until we have done away with his fool. Jacks! Off with that cuckoo’s head at once!’
The Joker dashed across the floor, and by simply shoving a few Sevens and Eights out of the way he disappeared out of the door, just as the Ace of Hearts had done only a few moments before. I understood that my visit was over, too, and followed him outside. A golden carpet of evening sunshine still lay between the corners of the houses, but neither the Joker nor the Ace of Hearts was to be seen.
KING OF DIAMONDS
… we had to wear a bell
around our necks …
Dad started to stir long before I had read about Frode’s death, but I was so absorbed in the sticky-bun book I couldn’t put it down. Only when Dad started to grunt did I hurriedly smuggle it into my pocket.
‘Did you sleep well ?’ I asked as soon as he sat up in bed.
‘Wonderfully,’ he said, opening his eyes wide. ‘And I dreamed about some weird stuff.’
‘Like what?’ I asked.
He stayed in bed as though he was afraid he would lose his dream if he got up.
‘I dreamed about the dwarf-sized people you told me about on the roof terrace, but although they were alive, you and I were the only ones who were surprised that we were living. There was an old doctor who suddenly discovered that all the dwarfs had a little mark under their big-toe nail. But you had to use a magnifying glass or a microscope to see it. The mark was made up of a playing card symbol and a number from one to several million. One had a heart and the number 728964, one had the symbol of a club and the number 60143 – and another had a diamond symbol and the number 2659. After a kind of census was held, it turned out that nobody had the same number. The people were like one big game of solitaire. But then – and now I am coming to the point – it appeared that two of the little people didn’t have any symbol at all. And they – yes, they were you and me. When the other dwarfs heard this, they were frightened of us and decided we had to wear a bell around our necks so everybody would know where we were.’
I had to admit it was a crazy dream, but I thought he had just carried on from what I had told him the night before.
Finally, he said, ‘It is quite extraordinary the kind of thoughts and ideas we have, but our very deepest thoughts jump out only when we are asleep.’
‘At least if we haven’t had too much to drink,’ I commented.
For once he looked at me and smiled without trying to outshine me with a smarter answer. It was also unusual that we went to breakfast without him having a cigarette.
The breakfast at Hotel Titania was simple but absolutely first-rate. Some cheap stuff which was included in the room price was automatically placed on the table, but there was also a huge buffet with the most delicious dishes which you could help yourself to if you were rich enough to pay for it.
Dad had never been a particularly big eater, but today he had juice, yogurt, egg, tomato, ham, and asparagus. I stuffed myself, too.
‘You were right about the drinking,’ he admitted as he opened his egg. ‘I had almost forgotten how bright the world could be.’
‘But you’re not going to stop philosophising, are you?’ I asked.
I had always been a little worried that his clever thoughts were linked to his drinking and he would become a different person as soon as he stopped.
He looked up at me, bewildered.
‘No, are you absolutely crazy? I’ll be a dangerous philosopher now.’
I sighed with relief and he was off again. ‘Do you know why most people just shuffle around the world without marvelling at everything they see ?’
I shook my head.
‘It’s because the world has become a habit,’ he said, sprinkling salt on his egg. ‘Nobody would believe in the world if they hadn’t spent years getting used to it. We can study this in children. They are so impressed by everything they see around them that they can’t believe their eyes. That’s why they point here and there and ask about everything they lay their eyes on. It’s different with us adults. We have seen everything so many times before that we take reality for granted.’
We sat for a long time eating cheese and ham. When our plates were empty, Dad said, ‘Shall we promise each other something, Hans Thomas ?’
‘It depends,’ I replied.
He looked me straight in the eyes. ‘Let’s promise not to leave this planet before we have found out more about who we are and where we come from.’
‘It’s a deal,’ I said, and shook his hand across the table.
‘But first of all we have to find Mama,’ I added. ‘Because without her I don’t think we’ll manage it.’
ACE OF HEART
… when I turned the card over, I saw
that it was the Ace of Hearts …
Dad was pretty wound up by the time we got in the car to drive to Piraeus.
I wasn’t quite sure if he was wound up because we were going to Piraeus or because later that morning he would call the agent who might be able to tell us where we could meet Mama.
We parked the car in the centre of the large town, on the coast, and made our way to the international harbour.
‘This is where we moored seventeen years ago,’ Dad told me, pointing to a Russian cargo ship and proceeding to tell me how life goes in full circles.
‘When are you supposed to call?’ I asked.
‘After three o’clock.’
He glanced at his watch, and I did the same. It was only half past twelve.
‘Destiny is a cauliflower head which grows equally in all directions,’ I said.
Dad flapped his arms about in irritation. ‘What are you gabbling about, Hans Thomas?’
I realised he was nervous about meeting Mama.
‘I’m hungry,’ I replied.
It wasn’t really true, but it wasn’t that easy to think of something to do with cauliflower. Anyway, we ended up going to the famous Microlimano marina for lunch.
On the way there, we strolled past a boat bound for an island called Santorini. Dad told me that the island had been much bigger in prehistoric times, but due to a violent volcanic explosion, most of it had sunk into the sea.
We ate moussaka for lunch, and except for Dad’s comments on some fishermen repairing a net just below the restaurant, not a lot was said during the meal. However, we did look at our watches three or four times. We both tried to do it without the other noticing, but neither of us was very good at peeping on the sly.
Dad finally said he would call – it was quarter to three. Before he went, he ordered a big bowl of ice cream for me; by the time it was brought to the table, I had already fished out the magnifying glass and the sticky-bun book.
This time I hid the little book under the edge of the table and tried to read it without anybody seeing.
I raced up the hill to Frode’s cabin. As I ran I thought I felt a weak rumbling under my feet, as though the ground was giving way.
When I reached the cabin, I turned round and looked back down at the village. A lot of the dwarfs had also left the banqueting hall and were swarming in and around the houses.
One of them cried at the top of his voice: ‘Kill him!’
‘Kill them both!’ shouted another.
I wrenched open the cabin doo
r. It looked terribly empty inside now that I knew Frode would never set foot here again. I collapsed on a bench gasping for breath.
When I stood up again, I found myself gazing at a little goldfish swimming round and round inside a big glass bowl on the table in front of me. At the same time I noticed a white sack over in the corner, possibly sewn from the hide of one of the six-legged animals. I poured the water and the goldfish into an empty bottle standing on a bench by the window and carefully placed the bottle and the goldfish bowl into the white sack. From the shelf above the door, I took down the empty wooden box which had housed Frode’s playing cards during his first days on the island, and I put this in the sack, too. Just as I was picking up a glass statue of a moluk, I heard a jingling sound outside the cabin, and the next moment the Joker came bursting through the door.
‘We must make our way to the sea at once,’ he said, catching his breath.
‘We?’ I asked, bewildered.
‘Yes, both of us. But you must hurry, sailor.’
‘Why?’
‘The magic island crumbles from within,’ he said – and then I remembered the Joker Game.
As I tightened the drawstring on the sack, the Joker started to rummage for something inside a cupboard. He soon turned round with a glittering bottle in his hand. It was half filled with Rainbow Fizz.
‘And this,’ he said.
We went out onto the front steps and met with a terrifying sight. The whole pack of dwarfs was on its way up the hill, some on foot and some riding moluks. The four Jacks were leading the way with their swords drawn.
‘This way,’ said the Joker. ‘Quickly!’
We ran round to the back of the cabin and took a little path which wound its way through a grove of trees above the village. As we dashed into the trees, we saw that the first of the dwarfs had reached the ridge of the hill.
The Joker leaped and sprang like a mountain goat on the path before me. I remember thinking it was a pity that this particular goat had bells, since the sound of his bells certainly made it easier for the rest of the herd to follow.
The Solitaire Mystery Page 22
