by Heather Long
“Lots of things. I’ve been flying, seen the pyramids, actually got to stand in the Acropolis, watched the sunset over the Mediterranean. Visited ancient temples in the Amazon. Got to see the northern lights, and I even got to swim with a whole pod of dolphins.” That last bit had been among my favorites. I still couldn’t get over how so many had just swum up to me and played, splashing. It had been like a dream.
All things I had dreamed about doing. Paris. London. Madrid. Shopping. Eating. Drinking wine. Laughing.
So much laughing.
“I’ve packed a lot of life into the last few days,” I admitted. “It’s pretty awesome.”
Tilting her head, Karmen continued to toy with her drink as she studied me. The smile playing at the corner of her lips was both devilish and amused, and maybe just a smidge intimidating. Or maybe it was the fact that neither Kindle nor Seth had returned from her quick run to the bathroom that had me on edge.
“Good,” she said. “Anything you haven’t gotten to do yet that you really want?”
I did not look at Tarus. Instead, I glanced toward the dark hallway. No sign of Seth or Kindle. He said that he hadn’t been fucking her. She said she rarely crossed paths with them. Still, he had been with her that night, and he made a beeline to join her the moment she wandered away from me.
And they still weren’t back.
“Hmm,” I frowned. I hadn’t gotten to see my mom. It had been what? Almost two weeks now? Two weeks since I died, and I’d all but abandoned my old life. There were co-workers I used to count on seeing every day. Then there was the roundtable of volunteer ladies I’d made friends with over Facebook, then discovered we got along famously in real life, too.
There was Trish at the animal shelter who took me to the dog park where I met Bish, and Sue over at the winery who hosted so many fundraisers. I couldn’t forget Angela who ran the Pretty Kitty mobile grooming service that also doubled as a way for us to do wellness checks on abused kids that Lysanne, the doctor over at Parkland reported. We were a cozy little network waging our crusade to do what we could where we could. I’d built the website with all its encryptions and firewalls so that our people would have a way to reach each other without worry from abusive spouses, parents, or criminally sucky construction worker boyfriends who might want to hurt them.
Two weeks ago, ish, I’d died and our dedicated group of five had suddenly been forever changed.
Not once in the last haze of wild days had I even thought about them. Had there been a funeral? Obviously, my mother would have wanted one. She probably buried me next to my dad. I trusted my friends would have shown up to support her. It was what we did, supported those who needed us.
Every drop of my good mood evaporated, and I tossed back the entire contents of the Party in Your Mouth. I’d been so focused on my hedonistic pursuits, I’d let myself forget about the loss they had suffered. Seth promised to see my mother for me. Had he done that already? He had promised to go that day, but never mentioned if he had. I was a chicken for not wanting to ask.
“You know,” Karmen said quietly. “Beating yourself up for things outside of your control isn’t really productive.”
“That’s the sober reality though,” I said. “I’m trying to squeeze life out of a stone while others grieve my loss.” While Mom did. “I’m being really selfish. Kind of puts a whole spin on trying to live a good life.” I stared into the empty glass. “I even thought about the fact that all I’d ever done was try to do right by people. To live within the rules. To leave the world better than I found it. What did that get me?”
I needed another drink.
Awareness of Tarus and Zhan boring holes into my back wasn’t lost on me, but I didn’t look back. I didn’t want them to fix this.
They really couldn’t fix this.
The countdown to my real exit had been running from the moment of Seth’s first electric kiss. He gave me these weeks. The job he wanted was done. Maybe I hadn’t punished his brothers, but we’d done one better. They were together again.
Tonight cemented that. Maybe I should let Seth off the hook with Alex, too. What was done was done. Getting revenge would be kind of petty. Who knew, maybe there was a police investigation and he’d already been arrested. That would be kind of poetic justice, right?
Leveraging our relationship to send him after one person who no longer mattered to me and couldn’t affect me anyway? Seth didn’t need that burden. He carried so many, and tonight, tonight they’d saved that woman who was like me.
They’d balanced the scales some.
It was enough.
Reaching across the table, Karmen covered my hand with hers. “You did the right things, Dahlia. You never did them hoping for reward. You did them because they were the right thing to do.”
“Yeah?” I blinked back the sudden burn of tears. “Maybe.” My voice was a little thick, and I shook my head. “I didn’t mean to get maudlin. Maybe I should let you and Kindle have your girls’ night…you know, if she didn’t fall in and drown while she went to the bathroom.”
Karmen chuckled. “She didn’t. She’s currently convincing Judgment that you don’t need a kiss from her because you’re a kind and true soul.”
A kiss from Kindle?
Blinking, I gaped. Before I could ask the next question on my mind, Bish glided up to the table with another drink. This one was radically different from the Party in Your Mouth. I swiped at my eyes quickly, in case any of the tears escaped. He set the frothy looking confection with its bits of chocolate and—wait, was that whip cream? Holy hell. It was like a dessert drink. Chocolate. Caramel. Bits of a candy bar. Something nutty and vanilla.
“What is this gorgeous thing?”
“Well, I’m Bish, but you knew that.” He winked, and I rolled my eyes even as I laughed. Incorrigible flirt.
There was a rumble of a growl from behind me, but I ignored it. Tarus had tucked me next to Bish while they’d handled business. Then again, Zhan warned me that Bish was the one coming for me when it was time. He was still my friend. “You’re cute, but I’m really only into you for Gingersnap.”
His laugh warmed me. Though he never once glanced at Karmen, his focus seemed to be solely on me, she glared at him. There was no mistaking the sudden venom in her gaze that erased almost as soon as I noticed it.
Like a blink, and then it was gone.
“I saw you finish off your drink, and since you’re all about new experiences and savoring life, I thought I’d offer you one of my favorites.”
Tempted, I lifted the glass to sniff it gently, and my stomach rumbled. The first drink had helped—a little—but this just made my mouth water. “Dare I ask?”
“Try it first,” Bish said, leaning against the table. “Trust me, it’s better if you sip it slow, so you can get the full body of it before you swallow.”
He was definitely dirtying that up on purpose. But it was funny, so I let him get away with it. “Fine, but just remember you’re in spitting distance if this is a joke.”
Spreading his hands, he only smiled.
I took the first sip, and the creamy chocolate, caramel, and yes, definitely nutty flavors, collided on my tongue before sliding down my throat. Sweet, salty, and delicious. Wow. The warmth blooming in my stomach as it hit chased away some of the chills.
“This is amazing.”
“I’m glad you like it. My Sweet Nuts aims to please,” he deadpanned it so perfectly, laughter roared through me.
Karmen snorted, but the giggles assaulting me chased away some of the intense sadness. What a ridiculous name for a truly awesome drink.
So, of course, I had to say something. After savoring another swallow, I hummed. “I like your Sweet Nuts a lot.”
Chuckling, Karmen shook her head, and then her eyes widened in absolute delight.
“Why are you talking to her?” Seth demanded from directly behind me.
Oh. Excuse me.
I twisted in my seat and stared up at his grim face. Kind
le was just a half-a-step behind him and to his right. She bit her lip as she gave me a fleeting, if genuine smile.
“I just brought her a drink, Seth. She needed a little cheering up, and you were busy.”
Seth scowled, but when I put a hand on his chest, he glanced down at me sharply. “You chase another woman to the bathroom, big guy, you don’t get to complain about who brings me a drink. We weren’t sequestered away anywhere. Tarus and Zhan are right there, and Bish is on the other side of the table. So hush.”
Frowning, Seth glanced from me to the drink to Bish and then back. Sure, Karmen said he’d been talking to her about kissing me or whatever, but it still didn’t look good the way he rushed after her. Lifting the drink, I swallowed down the rest, then sucked on the chocolate, never looking away from Seth the whole time.
His gaze riveted on me. “My sweet, I asked her if she could help me help you.”
Kindle sighed, but it was Karmen’s long, almost satisfied breath that snagged my attention.
Tarus and Zhan abandoned all pretense of sitting at their table. Tarus glared at Bish, but Zhan focused on Kindle.
“And?” they asked in near unison.
“I can’t,” Kindle said softly. “Dahlia is one of the kindest souls I’ve ever encountered.” The smile she bestowed on me warmed me more than the alcohol and the chocolate combined. “I am truly blessed for having met you, and I have nothing but sorrow that your light will go out. But I can make you one promise.”
Seth jerked, as did Bish, and Tarus frowned.
“Anything you wish,” Kindle told me with such genuine earnestness I believed her. “If it is in my power, I will do it. I cannot save your life, as it has already been extended, and that light is fading. But if I can make something else happen for you, I will.”
It was a kind offer.
Genuinely. “Thank you,” I told her. “I don’t know what your grace is and…” I held up a hand. “I’m not asking. I understand how personal that is.” I curled my fingers against Seth’s chest, a wordless apology, and when he covered my hand with his, I trusted he’d accepted it.
“It’s not really a huge secret,” Kindle told me. “Is there anything I can do?”
“I have some friends… Seth promised to talk to my mom.” I cut him a look, and he gave me a somber nod. His mood was even darker than when we’d arrived at the bar. This was a subject he avoided. “But there were some girls, we got to be close, and we did a lot of work together, I want—I want them to be okay. I don’t think it would end them that I died, but considering how, it might be hard on them.”
“I’ll look after them,” Kindle said, pressing a hand to her chest. A bell seemed to ring through me. “You have my word. Your friends and you share a similar heart. It will truly be my pleasure to protect them.”
Then I was good. “That’s everything I guess…” I just had to wait to be done, and until then, I had my guys. Glancing at Bish, I smiled. “Thank you for the drink and for your help earlier.”
“Always, Dahlia,” he said, his expression and eyes sincere and intent on me.
“It’s not time yet, right?” I almost dreaded the answer, even if I had to ask.
“No,” he said softly. “Not quite.”
Good. I wanted a little more with Seth, Zhan, and Tarus. “Karmen, Kindle…this was great.” Not really but… “I’m going to call it a night though.” I just wanted to go… I almost added the word home to that, but I didn’t have one of those anymore. “I want to go back with the guys. I’m tired.”
Exhausted really.
It all kind of weighed on me at once.
Karmen nodded slowly. “If I don’t see you again,” she told me. “Know I rooted for you from the first.” Bish jerked a little, then turned his head and stared at Karmen, but she ignored him.
Odd, but also kind of sweet. “I won’t forget the save at the apartment or the coffee. That was fun.”
With a small smile, Karmen nodded. “It really was.”
Sliding the empty glass against the table, I turned fully to Seth, and he scooped me right up, not bothering to let me stand. Zhan rested his hand against my leg, and Tarus grabbed my ankle gently. I didn’t have to say it, the familiar burst of sunset colors enveloped me. Only, there were streaks of silver twining through the russet hues, and indigo sparked as well as a brilliant shower of sparkling white.
Gorgeous. Absolutely stunning.
The tears I hadn’t shed earlier spilled out of my eyes. If I needed any further confirmation that the brothers had healed their rift, I had it. They transported me together.
Even worn out and exhausted, I embraced the elation. We were in their home. Maybe I only got to borrow it for a little longer, but I knew what I wanted to do.
We needed to fix their rooms, and they needed to make a space for Seth at the ranch.
Build that final bridge.
And if there was some dicking along the way, I would definitely not complain.
I was still floating as Seth carried me toward the bedroom, and my eyes grew heavier and heavier.
“She’s collapsing,” Zhan murmured, worry coating his voice.
“I know,” Seth rumbled.
I wanted to tell them I was fine, just a little tired, but I couldn’t seem to make myself speak. My vision dimmed.
There was no pain this time.
None.
Tarus entered my line of sight as I sank onto the soft bed. His hair tumbled around his face, and his eyes were stark.
I’d tell him everything would be all…
Black.
22
They say ‘taking your life into your own hands’ means that whatever you’re about to do will kill you. Seth had taken my life into his own hands, and yes, we all knew, it was going to kill me. - Dahlia
Seth
“No!” Zhan howled as he fell to his knees beside the bed. The pain in his voice broke Seth’s heart even more than it was already breaking. “It’s too soon. This shouldn’t be happening, right?” He turned wild eyes to Tarus, then Seth.
Stretching out to lay beside Dahlia, so he could extract what small sliver of peace from her presence as he could, he stroked her hair back away from her face. Then he pulled the blankets over her body so she wouldn’t feel cold, even in her sleep. “I don’t know, brother.” Seth’s words were somber, small. “I only took an educated guess on how long she would have, and I certainly didn’t believe she’d experience episodes like this.”
Tarus laid down on her other side, sliding his arm under her head with far more care than Seth ever would have thought Punishment capable of. “This has to be normal. I was hoping the last time was a fluke, that she was too excited or too hyped up on adrenaline. But…I think this is our normal, and the feeling in my gut says this is only about to get worse.”
The mattress bounced just slightly as Zhan let his forehead drop at the foot where he was still kneeling. If Seth had thought to predict this moment, he’d have said Zhan would have hogged her body just as he did during her last episode. But he was content to let Tarus and Seth soak in what comfort they could.
Though comfort was a relative term given the situation.
“What now?” Zhan’s words are muffled.
Tarus looked to Seth, waiting patiently as if he had all the answers.
“I don’t know. There’s no way to know anything about what’s happening. We could stop taking her out, stop doing things that would raise her emotions or her heart rate on the off chance that would help, but she’d hate that. Even if it did extend the small bit of life she has left.” The few weeks she was so desperately clinging to.
No, that wasn’t even right. She was living everything to its fullest, ecstatic to have the experiences they gave her. It was Seth, Tarus, and Zhan that were clinging to her time with a true desperation he didn’t believe he’d ever truly experienced. It was a humbling emotion.
Hiding his face in her hair, Tarus mumbled, “She would never go for that. The experiences are wha
t’s making this extra time worth it to her. Dahlia says she’s using this time as her chance to truly live her best life. She’d hate us if we confined her, and I don’t think I could take that.”
Her mortality had always hung over their heads, but never so much as it did in this moment. Seth ground his jaw as he searched his memory for the answers. Surely this was not the first time a Keeper had extended a life. Someone must have more knowledge than they.
The question was, who? And what could he entice them with to share the answers with him and his brothers? Keepers were, for the most part, a selfish bunch, not caring about each other outside of how it affected their grace. Kindle was the exception, also because of her grace. It was literally impossible for Kindness to plan and execute any nefarious agendas.
Karmen on the other hand, was the epitome of that kind of Keeper.
A thought formed in his head as he lost himself to the soothing image of Dahlia as she slept. For someone who had been dealt a bad hand in life, she had never let it harden her heart. Remarkable, really.
She had snark, as she liked to call it, but still so much kindness and compassion.
“Zhan, you can take my place for a few minutes. I want to speak with someone.” He smoothly untangled himself from the blankets as he climbed off of the bed.
Not surprisingly, Zhan didn’t question his request, simply taking his place and curving his large body around her slender one. He sighed as he rested his cheek on the top of her head.
Tarus caught Seth’s gaze, but made no other move. Quietly, he slipped from the room and quickly made his way to the balcony. Crossing his arms and closing his eyes, he reached out to someone he never thought he’d need.
He couldn’t trace his location like with his brothers, but he could request his presence. Before two heartbeats passed, Bish flashed into existence right in front of him.
“Well, well. I didn’t think I’d ever get an invitation to join your family orgy.” Bish smirked, but there was no real heat behind his barb.
“How much time does Dahlia have?” Seth ignored any attempt to rile him, heated or not. He had more important things on his mind.
