by J. J. Park
“That’s good. It would be nice to have you two with us at the same college. That’s if we get accepted, of course,” Gopan said.
“Why not? Your grades are perfect, aren’t they?” Chenoa asked eagerly.
“Yes, but it’s so competitive out there,” Gopan did not want to be over-assured.
“Where is the college you are applying to?” Ela asked.
“California coast. My dad is going to drive us there soon to see it. I am excited about it,” Dyami said.
Afterward, the group took a walk along the lakeshore, absorbed in their thoughts. Dyami wished that Ela would be enthusiastic about the college. He hoped that she would share the experiences the rest of them would have.
***
Shortly after, Nantan drove Dyami and Gopan to the university of their choice. He was confident that the two would enter the college. He believed that it would relieve their anxiety about leaving home if they familiarize themselves with the college beforehand.
“Well, what do you think?” Nantan asked as they walked around the campus.
“I like it. What about you?” Dyami asked Gopan.
“I like it too, but it’s a little unnerving to see these large buildings and different faces,” Gopan answered.
“You’ll get used to it once you start,” Nantan said in a reassuring tone.
After touring the college and checking out the dormitory, he took them to Wilder Ranch State Park. Nantan knew the park through his work. Dyami wondered why his father brought them there, observing his purposeful gait.
Without words, Nantan led them to the Ohlone Bluff Trail. The walk along the trail was an eye-opening new visual experience for the two who had grown up only seeing the forest and lake. The ocean felt as though it was opening up their future to a new world.
Nantan and two boys stopped at Fern Grotto Beach for lunch, as suggested by park personnel. They ate sandwiches in the company of sea otters who came by to check them out. The whole otter clan snooped on them curiously, yapping at each other, before swimming away to find fish. And next, it was pelicans diving down from the air into the water to catch fish.
“How do you like the ocean?” Nantan asked.
“Love it. Much different from our reservation,” Gopan said.
“Different animals and different views,” Dyami followed.
“True. The ocean, otters, and pelicans are very new to you. Otters are endangered, too, just so that you know,” Nantan paused, then continued,
“I brought you two here for the new experience, but also because I think it’s a place where you could find a summer job. They hire students from college during the summer.”
“I’d love to work here,” Dyami said excitedly.
“Yeah, it would be almost like a vacation,” Gopan said.
“I think it’ll be a good place to start for you two,” Nantan said confidently.
After touring the campus, they felt more at ease and less intimidated about going to college and leaving their community. It assured and encouraged them as they moved forward to meet their future.
THE PASSING OF AN ERA
“What is life? It is the flash of the firefly at night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime.
It is the little shadow which runs across the grass
and loses itself in the sunset.” - Blackfoot Chief Crowfoot
In the fall, the elder Taza, who has been lingering in poor health, passed away. The family had been anticipating it, but it was a blow all the same. Not only did his family and friends mourn his passing, but the whole community did. Even with his eccentricities and all, everyone loved him.
Taza’s lifetime friend, Kuruk, led the funeral service. He called upon deceased ancestors to join the ritual and smoke pipes with him according to their customs.
What priceless moments had Kuruk shared with Taza smoking tobacco, reminiscing back in time to their youth and solidifying ties?
They buried Taza in the community burial site remote from their living quarters with his personal belongings and favorite foods-pipe, tobacco, bows, arrows, the bread, sunflower cakes-for his afterlife journey.
His passing was a passing of an era.
***
It was the Thanksgiving holiday break, but Dyami steeled himself for another possible loss instead of jubilance. His horse, Lato, came down with swamp fever, a deadly infection, causing muscle weakness and weight loss.
Dyami walked his horse daily and gave him the best feed possible. The horse responded somewhat to Dyami’s care, and caring for Lato became his priority.
He thought about the good times he shared with Lato and what a faithful companion he had been in many activities. When the foursome had a picnic, Lato grazed next to them. He enjoyed carrots and celery, the special treat that Dyami’s mother packed into the picnic basket for him.
Lato was 13 years old now, and Dyami had hoped for many more years together. The sad thought of losing Lato preoccupied him. The veterinarian did not expect Lato to live much longer and stopped treating him. All Dyami could do was cover him with more blankets to shield him from the chilly autumn air. Lato neighed and nuzzled Dyami as sick as he was.
One cold day, Lato lay down and took his last breath. Dyami was there holding the horse’s head on his lap when he breathed the final air. Dyami mourned the loss of the faithful friend for a long time afterward. Even though his family was there for support, empty feelings of loss lingered.
***
Time moved ahead to New Year’s Eve. The foursome went downtown to celebrate. They met their schoolmates and tried to mingle but did not feel comfortable among the noisy crowd.
They left the scene and headed to the lake. Nature was an integral part of their life, and it was only natural for them to be in the woods immersed in the beauty of the moon and stars to welcome New Year. Invigorating crisp, clean air filled their lungs and cleared their heads.
Dyami and Gopan shared their New Year’s wish for the college, and Chenoa and Ela wished for high SAT scores. Ela was slowly adjusting herself to the idea of going to college. They renewed their friendships, and their hearts swelled with new hopes and yearning.
They skated on the frozen lake and watched winter fowls’ goings and comings on the remaining vacation days. When it snowed, they walked in snowshoes with Kitchi and Donner. Karl joined them when he came for a visit. Dyami could not help thinking about Lato. He missed his horse.
When spring arrived, the school buzzed with the talk of graduation. This year 30 students, almost the entire class, made it to graduation; it was an accomplishment. Dyami and Gopan received letters of acceptance from the college to which they applied.
***
The summer break came, and the two tried to enjoy it, realizing it was their last summer before entering college, but could not fully relax with the excitement of starting college and the unsettling thought of leaving home. They ended up busying themselves with shopping and packing for college much of the time.
Before going, Dyami’s father called them both to the teepee and gave them a heart-to-heart talk.
“I am very excited and happy for you two. It’s the beginning of your life as grown-ups, and the best time of your life, learning, exploring, and seeing new things,” he said.
“My dad says that it took him a while to get acclimated to the change,” Gopan said.
“Yes, it takes some time, but you’ll get there. My only advice is to stand firm on your two feet no matter what comes your way. There will be times when you feel that it’s more than you can take, but remember, the only person who can defeat you is yourself. Understand?”
Dyami and Gopan understood that they were now in charge of their life as a grown-up. The next day, the two friends left their village to enter a new and unfamiliar world as college freshmen, with their hearts swollen with hopes and expectations.
Dyami’s father drove them to college and left them at the dormitory, where they would share a room for the next four years. After unpack
ing, they went out to familiarize themselves with the layout of the campus further.
Groups of new students gathered around, waiting for orientation. All had bright eyes and youthful enthusiasm. The large numbers of students still overwhelmed and intimidated them, but having each other was reassuring.
Soon the two saw other ethnic groups of students and felt more at ease. Yet, Dyami noticed peculiar looks directed at him on occasions, and he felt unnerved.
11
THE TASTE OF REALITY
Dyami and Gopan hadn’t had time to think about anything besides studying and trying to become acclimated to campus life since they entered college. However, it wasn’t too long before Dyami found out the meaning of “the look.”
It happened during a lunch break. He walked into the cafeteria to wait for Gopan. It was not yet crowded. A group of white students was bantering loudly around a large table in the dining hall center.
When Dyami entered, one of them stared at him and said something to the group, and the bantering stopped. They all looked at Dyami. The same student approached as Dyami was taking a seat at a table.
“My name is Joe. What’s yours?”
“Dyami.”
“Dyami. What an interesting name. Where are you from?” Joe asked in a condescending tone.
“Arizona,” Dyami answered curtly, sensing something sinister in the stranger’s demeanor.
“Oh, Arizona!” he shouted mockingly.
Dyami felt lost and numb, not knowing how to react.
“The buck country! What are you doing here, chief?” Joe added with a sarcastic tone.
Dyami did not respond to the question. At this point, Gopan showed up and, sensing Dyami’s distress, approached them quickly, asking,
“What’s up? What happened?”
Realizing that Dyami was not alone, Joe got up and went back to his group. He said something to them, and the giggling followed.
“He tried to stir something up,” Dyami explained.
“What did he say?”
“He wanted to know where I came from and what I was doing here.”
“I lost my appetite. Let’s get out of here,” Gopan suggested.
“No! Let’s stay, and let’s get something to eat,” Dyami insisted.
They got hamburgers and remained in their seats. The bantering group soon left the cafeteria. For the first time, Dyami and Gopan had tasted what their old men were saying all along about white people, but they had not expected it so soon.
“How are you feeling?” Gopan asked, concerned.
“Besides what just happened, I am fine,” Dyami answered.
“We can’t be sensitive here. It’s just too rough, and we’ve got to get tough if we are to make it,” Gopan commented.
“I know. I’m glad we are together. I don’t think I could last alone.”
“Of course you could. Don’t underestimate yourself. Remember the vision? We were in a war. Didn’t it toughen you up a little?” Gopan asked, trying to cheer up Dyami.
“It was just a vision, but I agree in a way that it was more than just a vision. We learned something and grew up through it,” Dyami agreed. “Still, I can’t wait for the vacation. I’ve had enough dealing with this,” he added.
“The semester is almost over,” Gopan comforted Dyami.
***
The long-awaited winter recess arrived, a welcome break. Their families were happy to have them back at home and eager to hear about their college experiences.
“What was it like?” Chenoa asked the day after Dyami’s return home with her eyes burning with curiosity.
“Give him a chance to rest a bit and recollect,” Kuruk cautioned her.
“It was a little hectic. It was overwhelming in the beginning, but I am more relaxed now.”
“Do you like it? I mean the college,” Chenoa insisted despite her Grandfather’s caution.
“I suppose.”
“You suppose? What do you mean, you suppose? You’re not sure?” Chenoa pressed.
“It’s been only a short time. I don’t know the full story yet,” Dyami answered with ambivalence.
He didn’t want to frighten Chenoa with the difficulties he experienced. Sensing something was wrong with his subdued mood, his Grandfather called Dyami and Nantan to teepee the next day.
“You look much more serious than when you left home. Was everything as you imagined or expected?” Kuruk asked Dyami.
“It‘s serious out there. I didn’t think that I would experience and taste harshness so quickly,” Dyami answered.
“Oh, something did happen. I knew it,” Kuruk said.
“What happened?” his father, Nantan, asked.
Dyami told them about the incident in the cafeteria.
“Things haven’t changed much since my days. Listen, my son, our ancestors arrived here 12,000 years ago, and all the plains and mountains were ours. Just ignore them. They’ll soon get bored and go away,” Grandfather said in a firm voice.
He sounded much like his old friend, Taza. He appeared lonely these days without Taza at his side.
“It’s not easy to ignore them when they are so obnoxious to us,” Dyami responded, discouraged.
“Show them how tough you are. Don’t show those Palefaces you are upset, and they’ll soon lose interest,” Grandfather emphasized.
“It’s always the same story. It seems that these whites never get tired of it,” Grandfather added, puffing on his pipe.
The talk re-energized Dyami knowing that he had ever-present support from his family and community. He felt renewed and restored. Dyami and Gopan soaked in the energy of their families’ peaceful nature and love during this time.
They regrouped with Chenoa and Ela to share their college experiences at the lake. They often found various types of ducks gathered in the lake swimming, quacking, and feeding. The lake and ducks offered them endless pleasure all year round, although they had often seen the scenery. They loved to look at sparkling lake water under the late afternoon sun.
This year, Karl was with them. During the visit, Karl sensed the subdued mood.
“How are you two doing? How do you like college?’ Karl asked. His English had much improved now.
It surprised Karl himself as well as Dyami and Gopan that he would be interested in their lives.
“We love college. It’s a lot of work, though,” Gopan answered.
“What about you, Dyami?” Karl persisted, wanting to know more about their new life.
“Well, if you want to know the truth, it’s been very hard. We had a taste of the real world,” Dyami answered, looking at Gopan to see if this was the right move to tell such a story to Karl.
“Oh, I’m sorry. What happened? Please tell me. I want to know,” Karl persisted.
Dyami recounted the incident with Joe, including the name-calling. Karl listened to the story with much empathy, having been on the offending side most of his life until recently.
He realized how wrong it was, mainly when he considered friendship between these two young men and himself. They experienced and shared visions and holidays. Karl’s life was much more fulfilling because of them.
“If you want my advice, I would ignore them. Bullies are insecure, and if you ignore them, they’ll go away,” Karl advised them.
“That’s what we’ve been saying to ourselves, but it’s not that simple,” Gopan said.
“Another thing that helped me when I got transported here was reading the Bible and talking to the chaplain. I suggest that you find a church and join,” Karl advised them.
12
CHALLENGE
Dyami and Gopan returned to college in spring and got absorbed in the demanding new regimen all over again. After few weeks, they felt a need to rest and refresh.
“I am tired. I need a break,” Dyami said one day after a long library visit.
“You feel it too? Let’s go to the pier in town. Looking at those sea lions might give us much-needed relief. It could be a lot of
fun,” Gopan said enthusiastically.
Shortly after, they headed to town. It brimmed with students from the college.
“Hey, let’s rent a kayak and see the sea lions up close,” Dyami suggested.
“Do you know how to paddle a kayak?”Gopan questioned.
“It can’t be that hard,” Dyami said confidently.
With brief instructions from the man at the kayak shack, they rowed out into the ocean, feeling fresh ocean air and its invigorating energy all around them. Sea lions gathered and swam near their kayak, and several seagulls rode on small waves next to them.
After an hour, they felt re-energized, revived, and ready for a hearty meal. The two returned to the pier and headed toward an eatery. However, a few steps on the dock, they saw their pleasant day about to evaporate.
It was Joe, flanked by his clones, walking in their direction. The two had been successfully avoiding him on campus, but there he was few steps away.
“Hey, look! What have we here! Two bucks, looking for the hard stuff!” Joe barked, approaching them menacingly.
“Just ignore him,” Gopan said, but Joe blocked their way. He reeked of alcohol.
“What is your problem, man?” Dyami retorted.
“What is my problem? Finding two blackouts in town,” Joe said.
“It’s a free country, isn’t it?” Gopan shot back.
“Not for you. Go back to Reso,” Joe spewed out insults as his clones cheered him, riding high on the effects of alcohol. He knew that his group outnumbered two of them.
All the things Dyami heard about whites from two elders came back to him in a flash.
“You go back to the swamp where you belong. It’s our country,” Dyami blurted out, surprising himself and Gopan.
Joe immediately lunged, and Dyami responded in kind. In an instant, the two tangled in a brawl. Gopan tried to pull Dyami away, but Joe’s friends got into the melee, and soon, Gopan was throwing fists at them himself. Promptly, police arrived at the scene.
“Break it up!” a burly policeman ordered. Dyami stood back, but Joe continued to throw fists at him.
“I said, break it up!” the policeman yelled louder.
