"So are you," I say, yawning. "You're always worrying about us."
"Taking care of you is my job," he reminds me, his voice a deep rumble. One fingertip drifts down the side of my cheek, and then over the scar on my shoulder where Guerrero shot me. "Of course I worry about you every damn second of the day. If something happened to you, it would destroy me. Now that I've had you in my life, I can't imagine not having you as mine."
My stomach flutters at the earnestness in his voice and the simplicity with which he tells me that…like it's a fact of life and not the sweetest damn thing anyone has ever said to me. "I love you," I whisper, blinking my eyes rapidly to try to keep from crying. "You're everything to me."
He presses a kiss to my temple and then reaches for my hand, running his thumb over my engagement ring. "You set a wedding date yet?"
"I was thinking we should do it May 25th."
"Why that day?"
"It's my mom's birthday," I whisper.
"Yeah?"
"The baby will be a couple months old by then and it'll be warm enough for us to get married on the beach."
"You want a beach wedding?"
"I want to get married on our beach," I correct.
"Why?"
"Because that's where I fell in love with you." As much as I hated being in Santa Cruz without him, I don't hate Santa Cruz. All of the important moments in our life together have happened there. It's where we fell in love, and where I got pregnant. It's where he asked me to marry him, and where he's showered me with so much love I'll never be the same again. It's also his happy place…the place he goes when he needs to get away from the pressures and responsibilities of his job here. I want it to be where we start our life together as a married couple too.
"Fuck," he whispers, his voice rough. He turns my head toward him and takes my mouth in a deep kiss. By the time he's finished, my body is on fire again and I'm breathless. He slows the kiss and then simply rests there, his forehead pressed to mine. "Let's do it," he says then.
"Yeah?"
"Fuck yeah, baby. I want to marry you on our beach on your mom's birthday."
Happiness washes through me at his willingness to give me this. Since the day he claimed me, he's gone out of his way to give me everything I could ever possibly want. I'm so in love with him, and I just fall deeper every day. "I feel like I could float away again," I whisper to him, smiling.
"You're not allowed to float away." He kisses me once more and then pulls the blankets up over us. "Not until you've made an honest man out of me next May."
"Okay," I say, laughing.
"Mila," Roman whispers, running his fingers down the side of my cheek. "Wake up, baby."
"Don't wanna," I pout, pulling the blankets up over me like that's going to make him go away and leave me alone. It won't though. It never works. And I'm sleepy.
The baby waited until the middle of the night to wake up. She spent half the night using my ribs as a stage for her baby dances. It was almost six when she finally settled down and let me get some sleep. Roman was awake with us the entire time. He's such a good daddy. I don't know how he's awake and functioning right now though.
"Just for a minute, baby," he says, tugging the blankets right back down again. "I've got to go into work for a little while."
"No," I whine, not liking that idea any more than I like the thought of waking up right now. I'm sleepy and warm and I want him to cuddle up against me and sleep for a little while longer.
"I have to go, baby." He runs his fingertips down my cheek again. "I've got to take care of some shit for Finn."
"Fine, but tell him he owes me donuts."
Roman laughs softly. "You want me to bring you donuts?"
"Mmhmm, but Finn has to buy them or they aren't I'm sorry donuts."
He laughs again. "I'll tell him that. You gonna kiss me?"
I crack one eye open to see him sitting on the side of the bed beside me. His dark hair is wet and he shaved. He's dressed in his usual t-shirt and jeans. He's smiling at me like he finds me adorable…which he does because I'm lucky and he's amazing.
"When I get back, we'll go to the store. Luke is on his way over, but Octavio is right next door if you need anything. You still got his number?" Roman asks, brushing my hair away from my face.
"Yeah," I say and then yawn. "What time is it?"
"A little after nine."
"I should get up."
"You should sleep," he says. "Luke knows not to bother you. He'll probably crash out on the couch for a while anyway. He had shit to take care of when he left last night."
"Oh." I frown, feeling bad that he's going to have to come over here to babysit me instead of getting some sleep himself, but I'm not even going to ask Roman if it's necessary for me to have a bodyguard. I'm not pushing my luck, no way.
"I'll bring you donuts," he says and then leans forward to brush his mouth against mine in a sweet kiss.
I wrap my arms around his neck and cling when he goes to pull back. He smells so damn good, like spice, mint, and shampoo. I don't want to let him go. He smiles and kisses me again, his tongue teasing at the seam of my lips before slipping inside to play with mine. Just when it's getting good, he breaks away.
"I'll be back soon," he promises when I grumble wordlessly. "Get some sleep."
"Love you," I mumble.
"Love you too, baby."
The bed dips and then I hear him walking across the floor. Before the bedroom door even closes, sleep pulls me back under.
My cellphone rings a few minutes later, jolting me awake. I consider ignoring it, but it's Talia's ringtone, and she'll just call me until I answer. She's not very patient when she wants something, and I know she's dying to know how things are going now that I'm finally back in Los Angeles.
I grab my phone off the nightstand and drag it to my ear. "You're up way too early," I mumble after answering it.
"Early? It's almost noon," Talia says, laughing.
"What?" I pull the phone from my ear to look at the time. It's eleven forty-nine. "Shit," I mumble and sit upright in the bed, pushing my wild hair back with one hand. "Your little sister kept me up most of the night."
"You sure that wasn't my dad?" Talia snickers.
"Shut up." I smile and then laugh quietly. "He kept me up too."
"La la la," Talia sing-songs. "I can't hear you."
"Why aren't you in class?" I climb from the bed, which takes a lot of grunting and huffing, and then make my way to the bathroom. My reflection in the mirror catches my attention as I shuffle past it, making me smile. My hair is a tangled mess and Roman's marks mar my skin. I love seeing them there.
His marks have adorned my skin since the beginning. I hated when we were apart the last two weeks and the marks faded. Maybe that's ridiculous, but I missed seeing them standing in testament to the intensity of our connection. Even after all these months, we can't keep our hands off each other. We're completely lost in one another when we're together, and I love every second of it.
"My cognitive psych seminar was cancelled. I think the professor's wife left him. He's been off lately," she says. "Are you peeing?"
"Maybe. I'll never tell. I'm guessing you like your professor?"
"He's pretty awesome. He's been a psychologist forever. He tells us the coolest shit."
I smile as I finish taking care of business, loving how Talia worries about everyone else. She's tiny, but she's fierce. Once she decides she likes you, she's basically your mother hen for life. I'm glad she's enjoying her classes though. I was done with college after I got my degree, but she wants to be a psychiatrist. She's going to be in school forever.
"When is your next break?" I ask, putting my phone on speaker and setting it beside the sink so I can wash my hands. The baby kicks as I run a brush through my hair, trying to get the tangles and snarls out.
"I only have classes three days a week, but I'll have a couple days off later this month. Why?"
"We have a wedding to plan."
<
br /> "You set a date?" she yells.
"Yeah, we set a date," I say through a laugh at her enthusiasm, twisting my hair up into a messy bun. "May 25th."
"Your mom's birthday," Talia whispers. "I think that's perfect, Mila."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. You said you wanted everyone you love to be there with you. This way, your mom gets to be a part of your big day too," she says, her voice soft.
"I wish she could be there in person," I whisper and then clear my throat, trying not to cry. My mom died in a car accident when I was nine. I hate the fact that she never got to see me grow up, never got to meet Roman, and will never get to meet her granddaughter. My father and I aren't close. I haven't seen or spoken to him since I left home. I don't miss him, but I miss my mom so much. She was my best friend when I was a little girl. I don't know what she'd think about me marrying a man closer to her age than my own, but I think she'd love Roman because of the way he loves me.
"She will be there," Talia tells me. "Maybe you won't be able to see her, but I know she'll be standing right there beside you when you marry my dad."
"You're going to make me cry," I warn Talia, sniffling.
"Don't cry. I'm just saying…you may not see your mom, but she's always been there. And now she'll always be a part of our family because she's part of yours."
"I love you, Tal." I wipe at my eyes as two tears slip down my cheeks.
"I love you too, Mila." She pauses for a moment and then giggles. "You know I'm going to be your stepdaughter when you marry my dad? That's so weird."
"You're going to be my Maid of Honor too."
"Well, duh," she says with a laugh. "Of course I am."
Chapter Five
Roman
"Don Pledger is Remi's uncle," Kincaid announces, stomping into my office. "He died a year ago."
"Cancer," I say, glancing up from my desk where I'm finishing up the rest of my transfer paperwork. I'm not sure why I'm surprised Kincaid already knows as much about Don Pledger as I do. Luke was able to find the old man listed in the local DEA office's emergency contact book for Remi, and Addison was able to pull public records. How Kincaid got ahold of the information, I don't know, but he's a resourceful motherfucker. He has contacts in this city I know nothing about. "Don Pledger had no kids, no spouse, and no insurance coverage."
Kincaid grunts, leaning up against the wall. His clothes are wrinkled. There's mud on his boots and jeans. His eyes are shadowed beneath, the steely blue-gray color washed out and haunted. If he's sleeping, he's not doing a whole lot of it. He looks like shit.
"You okay?" I ask.
"Peachy fuckin' keen," he mutters, closing his eyes.
I eye him for a moment, not sure if I should push or not. His shit isn't my business, but I'm partially responsible for him being here. I'm the one who pushed Finn to get him back to Los Angeles…and I'm the one who told him Curtis Kaleo was causing problems for January.
A muscle in his cheek tics and I decide to keep my mouth shut.
"I'm guessing you also know his house is sitting empty?"
Kincaid jerks his chin in a nod. "Shit hasn't been empty for a year though. There's no dust on anything, and the bed is freshly made."
"You checked it out?"
He pops his eyes open, turning them on me.
"Right," I mutter with a shake of my head. "Stupid question."
"You think Pledger went to Francisco to help his uncle pay for chemo?" Kincaid asks.
"The uncle was what? Seventy-nine?"
Kincaid nods.
"Remi wasn't an altruistic or sentimental person as far as I know. I can't see him making a deal with Francisco to save an old man, even if the old man was an uncle." Sad fact is, the old man wasn't going to last much longer with or without chemo. Remi wouldn't have made a deal with the devil for a lost cause.
Kincaid grunts his agreement.
"You think he's staying in the house?"
"Someone's been staying there. Shit is way too fucking clean."
I drum my fingers on the desk, thinking. Tent city was a bust. We combed through the streets for hours yesterday and came up with exactly nothing of use. If Remi's staying there, flushing him out is going to be a task. And I'm not so sure he's laying low with the vagrant population, despite him hiding the car in Skid Row. "We can stake out the old man's house, see if he shows up."
"By we, I assume you mean you and me."
"You trust anyone else with this shit?" I ask.
Kincaid grunts again and then drops his head back against the wall, letting it bounce a few times. "Last time I went on a fucking stakeout, a goddamn nightclub exploded and I got shot by some crazy bitch Elijah Noel dragged into town. And the time before that, some behemoth motherfucker with a stupid ass name broke my hand, after I got probed by the longest goddamn branch known to mankind."
"I doubt Remi's going to blow up his uncle's house," I mutter dryly. "Or probe you with a branch."
Kincaid tips his head down to glare at me. "My point is," he growls, rolling his eyes, "that shit doesn't ever end well for me. I fucking hate stakeouts."
"Finn just bought Mila two dozen apology donuts. She'll share if you come along to keep me company." Stakeouts aren't exactly my cup of tea either. The only thing worse than being stuck behind a desk is being cooped up in a car for hours on end, staring at nothing. But I'll do it if it means finding Remi. And Kincaid trusts fewer people than I do, especially when it comes to Lillian Riley, so we both know he's not going to tell me no despite his bitching to the contrary.
He adores the ballerina and doesn't trust anyone else to kill the son of a bitch who hurt her. Truthfully, had she not been in danger, I don't think he'd have stepped foot in Los Angeles ever again, regardless of Finn's orders.
"What the fuck are apology donuts?"
"No fucking clue, but Mila's pregnant," I say with a shrug. "She says she wants apology donuts, she gets apology donuts." At this point, she could ask Finn for just about anything and he'd make it happen. He knows I wanted to turn in my badge when Guerrero shot her, but she talked me out of it. As far as he's concerned, she's a goddess who can do no wrong. On that, we're in complete agreement.
Kincaid nods like my explanation makes sense to him and then he narrows his steely eyes on me. "Where'd he get the donuts from?"
"Tony's." It's the only donut shop in this area worth a damn.
"Fuck, fine," Kincaid huffs, giving in to the inevitable. "But I want an éclair and one with strawberry filling."
"Done." Mila doesn't like the ones with filling anyway. According to her, it takes away from the donut experience, whatever that means. It works out for me because I fucking love the cream filling. Especially when I get to lick it off her sexy body.
"What time?" Kincaid asks, looking at his phone. "I got shit to do today."
"Kaleo?"
He shrugs, which is answer enough.
"Meet me at my place at nine."
"We're not taking the fucking Corsica."
"Agreed. My knees are already bruised."
"Serves you right for forcing me to ride in that goddamn death trap with you," he mutters, making me laugh. He flips me off and then stomps toward the door, only to pause and look back at me. "Where are Ames and Bethel today?"
"When Finn left here an hour ago, he was headed over to meet with Ames and a couple guys from the DEA."
"If you see Ames again, tell him I'm looking for him."
"Will do. You going to check on Tristan and Lillian?"
"Yeah."
"How's January?" Some kid tried to break into her house the other night. Kincaid stopped him, but it worries me that Kaleo is escalating his harassment. If he doesn't back off, Kincaid really will burn his world to the ground. It's no less than what he deserves, but I'd rather not be cleaning up any bodies Kincaid might leave in his wake.
Kincaid tenses, his entire body going rigid at the sound of January's name. A potent mix of grief, pain, and desperation flares in his eyes befo
re he manages to school his expression again, slamming a stoic mask into place.
A swell of sympathy washes through me when I notice the way his hands shake. I can't even imagine what he's going through right now, but I'm not stupid enough to think he'll talk to me about it.
"She's fine," he says, his tone terse.
"Let me know if you need anything," I murmur, backing off.
He jerks his chin in another nod and then stomps out of my office without another word. I stare after him for a moment, shaking my head. I hope like hell he's able to get Kaleo on a leash before the dumb son of a bitch hurts his girl. If Kaleo hurts her…well, I'm not sure there are enough cops in Los Angeles to stop Kincaid from ripping this city apart to destroy him.
My phone rings, snagging my attention. I grab it from my desk, grinning when I see Brady Kaplan's name on the screen. Brady was my partner until he resigned after everything went down with Guerrero. "Brady," I greet him. "How's Arizona?"
"Boring as shit," he mutters, a smile in his voice. "It's fucking great."
"How's Carla doing?"
"Good, man. She's pregnant again. Found out yesterday."
"Congrats, brother."
"Thanks. I can't fucking wait to be a daddy again. There's nothing like it."
The pride in his voice sends a pulse of emotion through me. I can't wait to be a daddy again either. It kills me that I missed getting to see Talia grow up. I'm not missing a single second of this baby's life. Not one.
"I'm glad, man," I tell Brady, signing off on the last on my paperwork and shoving it all back into the file folder to leave on Finn's desk. "You're a damn good father."
"Thanks," he says and then clears his throat. "So what the fuck is up with you? Your voicemail was cryptic. Call me back, it's important," he mimics, pitching his already deep voice even deeper. "You sounded like the goddamn Terminator."
"Man, fuck you," I say, chuckling. I miss the hell out of him, but I'm happy he's out of this shit and moving on. After el Demonio targeted his family, he was fucked up for a while. About a week ago, he opted to take his family to Arizona where Carla's parents live to get them out of harm's way. I knew when he left that he wasn't coming back. I'm happy for him, but I miss his stupid ass. "I called to tell you that I need you back here May 25th if you're going to be my best man. Now I'm thinking I'll just invite Carla and Sebastian and leave your ass in Arizona."
Desire Me (Her Best Friend's Father Book 4) Page 7
