by Amy Richie
Darting too quickly out the opened doorway, I lost my footing in a puddle that had already formed. I was down to my knees before I could catch myself, although I would have ended up there anyway; I would never have taken my hands off of Edna, even to stop myself from falling.
“Rani,” Betna screamed, pulling uselessly on my shoulder.
“I'm okay,” I gasped. “The baby is fine.” She wasn't even crying, and Edna cried about everything.
After I made it back to my feet again, we started again toward the council building, this time slowing down enough to keep my footing. Sasha was at the door to usher us in when we got there.
“Give the baby to me,” Angelina demanded from right behind Sasha. “I have a dry blanket.”
“Is Dais back yet?” I gushed out, still trying to catch my breath.
Sasha's face answered before her mouth formed the words. “He's not back yet.”
Chapter 14
I knew Constantina was watching me as I paced the length of the council building—I could feel her eyes on me. Trying to control myself, I took a deep breath and sat on the floor next to Sasha. I let my breath out as slowly as possible so it wouldn't sound like a sigh.
“He must have holed himself up somewhere,” Sasha said again in low rush of words. “He doesn't want to be out in this storm.”
I pressed my lips so tight together that the skin just under my nose hurt. I nodded shortly. We had already had this conversation several times in just the small bit of time we had all gathered in the big room.
Hopefully she wasn't saying that because she thought it would make me feel better, considering it wasn't working. Maybe she was trying to convince herself that Dais was fine out there all by himself.
“I'm going to look for him,” I announced, rising back up onto my feet. “He might have went back to our house.”
“What?” Sasha stood up next to me.
“I'll run home and see if he's there.”
“No,” Constantina shot me down. “You can't go out there; it isn't safe.”
“I know it isn't safe.” I almost glared at her but controlled my temper. Why does she think I want to go out looking for Dais? Because I know it’s not safe out there.
“Consider the stress you're putting on everyone else,” Doctor Gourini's deep voice boomed out. “You'll stay right here with us. The boy will be all right.”
My heart leapt into my throat. What could I say to that?
“I'll go,” a deep voice suddenly offered.
My head snapped up, and I caught the eyes of Tiny staring at me. “What?”
“I'll go,” he said again, lumbering up off the floor. “I'll see if the boy is at your place, and if he is, I'll bring him here.”
“Why?”
His wide eyes blinked rapidly. “Why?” he repeated dully.
“Why would you go out there for Dais?” He didn't even know Dais. He had just meant him a few weeks ago, so why would he go out there in this dangerous weather for a boy with blond hair and green eyes that meant nothing to him?
“Why wouldn't I? The wind will have a harder time knocking me over than a tiny thing like you.”
My mouth falling open, I seemed unable to tear my eyes away from the man.
“Go then,” Constantina suddenly barked out. “Hurry back though.”
“I'll go with you.” I scrambled up.
He was already turning away with a shake of his massive head. “You wait here,” he gently ordered. “I'll be faster on my own.”
It was difficult not to start pacing again as I waited for Tiny to come back with Dais, or at least I hoped he would bring Dais back with him. My mind kept going back to what I would do if he came back alone, what I would do if Dais was lost somewhere on the island—all alone in the first storm on our new home.
I swallowed hard, biting back anything I wanted to say. The urge was mounting inside me to bolt out the door despite Constantina and Doctor Gourini. Years of fighting my internal struggles kept me firmly on the ground and waiting patiently.
Several minutes later, the front door opened with a bang that made several of us jump.
Tiny stood silhouetted in the open doorway for a few seconds before he managed to pull the slab of wood shut. He shook the water from his face and hair as he strode toward us, looking more like a bear than a person.
“Was he there? Did you find him?” I asked even before he had reached us. Sasha put one hand against the inside of my arm to stop me from running to meet him.
“Wasn't there,” Tiny grunted, accepting the towel that Marcus held out to him.
“What do you mean?” I asked blankly, refusing to understand.
Tiny shook his head again, this time in answer to me rather trying to get more water from his hair. “I searched the house; the boy wasn't there.”
My heart sped up, stuttering loudly inside my chest. “Did you look outside? Maybe he was trying to get here.” I stopped talking when my voice caught on the lump that had somehow formed in the back of my throat.
Dais would have known we were in the council building to wait out the storm. He would have tried to get here too. He might have fallen out there as he ran, blinded by the rain. What if he was lying on the ground somewhere with the rain drenching him?
Without much thought, I was suddenly on my feet in front of Tiny.
“I did look for him,” he said slowly. “The visibility isn't great out there.”
“So you might have missed him,” I instantly shot at him.
“Might have,” he agreed. “But I think the boy is smart enough to have gotten to shelter before the heavy rain started.”
“Unless he fell.” Arguing was not something I did, but I was starting to feel desperate. “I ...” My throat felt tight again.
“I suggest,” he put one large hand on my shoulder, heavy enough to make me unbalanced, and then he let go quickly. “I suggest,” he began again with his hands at his side, “that you wait here for him at least until morning.”
“Morning,” I spluttered, already making up arguments in my head. “I can't leave him out there until the morning.”
“Rani,” Constantina stepped up beside me, “you don't know where he is.”
“I know.” That was the point.
“And you don't know where to look,” she continued. “It's dark out there, rainy and dark. If you go out there now, you'll be lost too.”
“Wait until morning,” Doctor Gourini ordered deeply. “If he's not here by first light, we'll decide what to do then.”
I glanced from one to the other, my mouth falling open and then snapping back shut again. Constantina and Doctor Gourini stared back at me, not budging. Not seeing much choice, I sank back onto the floor next to Sasha without any more fight.
Chapter 15
By the time the others woke up, I was already sitting rigid against the wall. My back was stiff from the uneasy hours I had spent waiting for morning. Sometime during the long night I had fallen into a restless sleep, only to be jerked awake by a loud crack that turned out to be a tree falling down onto one of the small houses.
“Looks like it was your house that got hit last night, Betna,” Marcus gasped, hurrying back inside to the warmth of the blazing fire.
“Ruined?” she asked, her voice thick with sleep and her brown eyes wide.
Marcus nodded. “We'll be able to get it fixed back up.”
“Never mind that,” Constantina pulled Edna onto her lap. “Lucky the two of you weren't in there.”
Sasha pushed herself from the floor with a small groan. “I'll put some water on to boil,” she offered, still rubbing her eyes as she fetched the large black pot from a shelf. “Some breakfast is just what we need.”
Careful not to catch anyone's eyes, I stared down at my hands clasped tightly in my lap. It wasn't going to be possible for me to eat breakfast like nothing was wrong when Dais had not returned in the night like everyone had assured me he would.
I pressed my lips tight together. T
he entire night had been spent imagining all the things that could have happened to my small son out there all alone. Somehow, I didn't feel like myself anymore. Something in me had changed in the early hours of the morning, while the others slept and the wind raged.
“Rani, do you want to give me a hand with this?” Sasha grunted, hauling the now full pan back inside after filling it with the water from the barrel that sat just outside the back door of the council building.
Finally raising my eyes from my hands, I looked over at Sasha. “I can't,” I told her loudly.
Everyone stopped talking.
“What do you mean you can't?” she half smiled, clearly not sure if I was serious or not. If I had ever refused anyone anything, it wasn't a time I could recall.
“I can't help you,” I said again, this time standing up, keeping my back rigid.
“Rani?” I didn't blame her for being confused.
“I'm leaving.”
“What?” Her voice rose half an octave.
“What are you talking about? Leaving?” Constantina asked sharply.
“Dais didn't come back,” I said stiffly, my nostrils flaring with anger. The leader of Ortec had made me stay inside where it was safe and warm while my child was still out in the storm. Whatever warmness I had thought I’d seen blooming between the pair of them was entirely made up in my own head, I realized with a sharp pang of regret.
“I know, but ...”
“If it was your child out there,” I turned now to glare straight at her, “you wouldn't have let everyone stay inside while she was lost.”
Hers weren't the only eyes that widened; I heard someone gasp behind me, but I didn't care.
“I'm going to go out there, and I'm going to find Dais.”
“I just,” she began in a voice weakened by shock, “didn't want you to be lost too.”
“When have you ever cared what happened to me?” I asked coldly, still glaring her down.
Her face blanched white while her mouth formed a perfectly shaped O. “Rani, I—”
“If he's ...” I cut her off, my chest heaving with suppressed fury, “if I can't find him, I'll never forgive you for not letting me go last night.”
“Rani, she wasn't the only one who didn't want you to go out there last night,” Doctor Gourini began softly. “In a storm like that, you wouldn't have been able to find your way back to your house, let alone search the island for the boy.”
I shook my head roughly from side to side, not able to reign in the emotion now that it had broken free. “I have lost everything that ever meant anything to me,” I said thickly, almost blinded by the wetness that filled my eyes.
“We all have,” Sasha said, attempting to wrap her arms across my shoulder.
I pushed her away. “Everything,” I repeated faintly.
“Not everything,” Constantina snarled. “Everyone in this room has lost almost everything, but not everything.”
“We still have each other,” Angelina said softly.
“And all of us are worried about Dais,” Betna chimed in.
I took several steps back until my back hit the wall. “I'm going to look for him,” I said again.
“Of course you are.” Constantina abruptly stood up, handing the baby in her lap back to Betna. “Now that it's light again, we all are.”
I stood alone against the wall trying to calm my breathing as Constantina barked out orders of where everyone needed to look. It was hard to wrap my head around what had happened. I had yelled at her—I had stepped out of my place and insulted the leader of Ortec. And I couldn't even find it in myself to be sorry about that.
“And Sasha, you can check the hospital,” Constantina continued briskly. “Take Tiny with you. No one needs to be out there alone.”
There was instant flurry of movement.
“Rani,” Constantina called to me, jerking me out of the haze that still flooded my head.
“Yeah?” I responded instinctively.
“You and I will go to your house. Maybe he made it there and fell asleep.”
I nodded mutely.
“We'll meet back here when we've searched our buildings,” Doctor Gourini called out above the bustle of activity. “Make sure you all have the rain covers.”
Sasha thrust the heavy plastic material into my hands, which I pulled over my head in the same dream-like state. “Are you okay?” she asked, her face close to mine.
“I don't know,” I told her. My hands were still shaking and my heart was still speeding along a little too quickly, but my eyes were dry now. “What if we don't find him?” I asked in a small voice.
“We'll find him,” she said fiercely, pinching my side. “Don't you dare think like that.”
I took a deep breath and let it out in a huff.
Not thinking the worst was so much easier to say than to do.
Chapter 16
The rain was cold on my skin, so cold that it momentarily stole my breath. Sasha had left the council building only a moment before we did, but the storm had already swallowed her and Tiny from view. “Where did they go?” I screeched, bustling to keep close to Constantina.
“To the hospital,” she yelled back. Without warning, she reached back and wrapped her hand around mine, fastening me to her side with an iron grip.
“Do you think they'll be okay?” I stumbled along behind her.
“Yes.” She didn't turn around.
How did Constantina know that for sure? The wind was still howling. How did she know it wouldn't pick Sasha up and throw her out into the ocean? Our town wasn't that far away from the ocean.
“Just keep moving,” she called over her shoulder.
Constantina was right, of course. I didn't have time to worry about anyone else. I was focused on finding Dais, let Sasha worry about herself for once. An odd, heavy feeling settled itself in the bottom of my stomach, but we'd reached my small house before I had time to properly search the feeling and figure out what it meant.
“The door is open,” Constantina unnecessarily screamed back at me. “Do you see that?”
I saw that.
It wasn't ripped off the hinges like a few we had seen on the way, but it was standing wide open and bouncing around in the wind. “Maybe Tiny didn't shut it,” I suggested. He must have been in a hurry the night before; it was understandable that he had left the door open.
“Or maybe Dais came here.”
“And left the door open?”
She shrugged.
There was no point standing outside the door trying to guess, I decided with a burst of irritation. “Let's go look,” I growled, ripping my hand out of her grip. I led the way into the house, my steps more sure than I actually felt.
“Be careful,” she hissed, right behind me.
“I am,” I hissed back.
“You don't know what kind of damage there is here,” she said a little louder.
Besides the water on the floor that got in from the opened door, the house was untouched. Glass hadn't yet been placed in the window holes, so I didn't have to worry about broken glass on the floor; I didn't have much in my house actually.
“Dais,” I yelled, flinching as the sound echoed all around us. “Dais,” I called again a little lower. “Are you in here?”
I didn't expect an answer. I had known since I saw the open door that he wouldn't be in there. It would have been closed if he was. Still, the silence sliced through me as if someone had cut me with a knife. Who knew silence could be so painful?
Constantina swept past me and ran throughout the house, searching the one empty room and then back to my side again. “He isn't here,” she panted.
“I know,” I replied dully. “I already know.”
She clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, agitation etched along the lines in her forehead. “Let's look around outside,” she suggested.
Not sure if there was any other choice to be made, I followed her again.
The rain was starting to show signs o
f slowing down, at least it was a little easier to see now than when we had entered the house. I squinted in the hazy morning light, looking out toward the forest that I knew Dais loved so much.
There was a distinct chance that I would be making a trek into those trees before long. If we didn't find him soon, the forest was the next place to search. Dais knew the trees, so there was a good chance that he could find a place to hide from the rain last night. Hadn't he just told me last week about a tree with a hole in it that was big enough for him to crawl inside of? At the time I had been appalled at the thought and ordered him to stay away from such a dangerous hiding place. Under the circumstances though, I would be okay with him getting out of the cold rain.
Then again, my face twisted as a new thought occurred, what if the tree fell like the one that had fallen into Betna and Angelina's house?
“Let's try over here.” Constantina's voice pulled me out of my disturbing thoughts.
“Where?”
“Over here,” she pointed. “He told me there was a big tree over here. Maybe he's there trying to stay dry.”
I couldn't fault her for hoping, but it wasn't likely that Dais had made it this close to home and then decided to hide in a tree. I jogged to catch up when she ran forward. The tree was big, bigger than any other that I could see, but Dais wasn't there.
“Hey!”
We both turned at the sound. Sasha was there with Tiny and Angelina and Marcus, waving us over.
“Maybe they found something,” Constantina suggested hopefully, and she hurried to join the group.
I moved slower. The look on Sasha's face, or at least what I could see of it, wasn't encouraging. “Well?” I prompted, nerves making me harsher than I intended.
“He wasn't in the hospital,” Sasha confirmed my fears.
“Or in the bakery,” Angelina added with a frown.
“He doesn't seem to be anywhere in the town,” Marcus concluded for us. “Which means ...” His eyes strayed to the trees behind me.
We would have to go into the forest and search for him there.
“Which means what?” Angelina prompted angrily.
“We need to look in the woods,” he half shouted, the wind was starting to pick back up.
