GS: I didn’t think I’d need a tissue for today’s interview.
GS to TM: What about you? What did death teach you?
TM: That life is never perfect. It can’t be. So reaching for more is okay. When life pushes, it’s okay to push back.
GS to TM: Have you ever thought of writing a book about your experiences as a gay man?
TM:
DM: I’d read it.
TM: That’s because the entire thing would be about you.
GS: Drew, all of us at GearShark are wondering about your racing career. Are you planning to return to the NRR, or are you retiring?
DM:
GS: Really! This is exciting news! Your fans are going to be so thrilled.
DM: I’d like to personally thank all my supporters for their well wishes and love during my accident and recovery. I know I’ve been quiet across social media and so has Trent, but we are grateful and we have read all of the love sent our way.
GS: Was making the decision to return to racing difficult?
DM: Of course. I have a husband and kids now. Being a race car driver, especially for the NRR where there are no rules, is dangerous. But we talked about it—
GS: By we, you mean you and Trent?
DM: Of course. I’d never make this kind of decision without him. And we’ve decided that I’ll make a comeback when I’m ready.
GS: Any idea when?
DM: I’m not sure.
GS to TM: Do you really want Drew back in the driver’s seat? Aren’t you scared?
TM: If I shied away from everything that scared me, I’d never leave my house.
GS: A big, confident guy like you is scared of that much?
TM: You’d be surprised.
DM to TM: You’re the strongest guy I know.
TM: I know it’s risky. But cars are in Drew’s blood. And we want to be examples to our kids that you don’t quit when things get really hard. You rise above.
DM: I don’t know how many more seasons I have left in me on the track. I’ve been doing this awhile now. But I know I want at least one more.
GS: So you think Lorhaven will be this season’s champion?
DM: Of course.
GS to TM: What about you, will you continue on working for the NRR?
TM: Yes, and as Drew’s manager. But right now, we’re both on extended leave of absence. We want to be with our kids. And with each other.
GS: Thank you for being so forthcoming in today’s interview. I feel like we got see a whole other side to the both of you.
DM: Thanks for sitting down with us.
GS:
DM: Good?
GS: Very.
GS: One final thing. Could you offer any kind of advice or words of wisdom to any out there who might be struggling with life, death, or acceptance?
TM to DM: Why are you looking at me?
DM: You’re the deep one.
GS: No pressure.
TM:
DM: That’s my husband. I like him better than French fries.
GS: Thank you for sitting down with us and for the exclusive look at your wedding. Nice rings, by the way.
TM: Thank you for all the support you and the entire staff at GearShark has shown us.
* * *
And that, loyal GearShark readers, is the sit-down, in detail, that I had with Trent and Drew Mask.
By the way, isn’t it adorable that Drew took Trent’s last name? I think it’s so easy to see why these boys have captured everyone’s hearts and continue to be some of the most talked about racers in this country. We here at GearShark will be on hand when Drew Mask makes his comeback at the NRR, whenever that may be, and of course will have full coverage of it all. Until then, we wish Trent and Drew nothing but the very best as they embark on marriage and fatherhood, something I think we can all agree these guys will excel at.
And hey, do this journalist a favor. The next time you see Drew and Trent in public—or any couple who looks just like them—smile brightly or offer a kind word. The world knows enough hate, so let’s show it some kindness, especially to those who love without limits.
49
Drew
* * *
I lived.
I died.
I was given a second chance at life.
Turned out what I wanted in my first life was exactly the same thing I wanted in my second.
Love. Happiness. To be nothing but myself.
I didn’t get it exactly right my first time around… but still, things were pretty damn good. So now I totally surrendered to everything I ever wanted but maybe was too scared to have.
I’d always loved Trent.
Now I loved him more. Now we had a son and a daughter we could love the way we weren’t when we were small.
This was what life was. The good and the bad. The high and the low.
It’s sleeping with a Pikachu on your face and dog drool on your feet. It’s waking up to a fussing baby and a son who calls you dad, not because it’s your title by birthright, but because you earned it in his eyes.
Most of all, it’s drinking coffee made by the man you love and knowing he owns you—that you were brave enough to give yourself over completely, body and soul.
I honestly had no idea what life might throw at me and Trent next.
But it didn’t matter, because whatever it was, we would be together.
Epilogue
Trent
* * *
The second I knocked on the door, my nerves spiked.
I’d been calm the entire way here. Calm and collected despite how hard the decision was. It had taken a lot to get on that plane a few hours ago.
Not because of the destination, but because this was the first time since his accident that I was away from Drew for longer than a few hours. This was the first time I’d ever been away from my kids.
My kids.
Two words I never thought I’d ever say. Two people I never thought I’d have. Hell, having Drew as my other half was quite honestly more than I deserved. I considered it pushing my luck to ask for or even want more.
I’d been content being an uncle.
Until those kids came into my life. And now I couldn’t even fathom ever not having them.
Which is why I was here today. A place I never thought I’d be.
Life was like that, right? Filled with nevers. Layered with people and situations that didn’t seem possible.
Fate knew no boundaries. Fate did what it had to do to find a way… and that included putting you through hell. ‘Course, how would a man be able to fully appreciate heaven if he hadn’t danced with the devil?
Footsteps on the other side made me straighten. The door swung open, and our eyes met instantly. His, which had been curious and even, I daresay, friendly, turned to shock.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
> It was a voice I never wanted to hear again.
See what I mean about fate? Never say never.
“Mr. Forrester,” I said, dipping my chin. “I have something I’d like to say to you.”
His upper lip curled. “I don’t want to hear it.”
The door slammed in my face.
I knocked again and braced myself for a blast of anger when it opened again.
This time, though, it was Drew’s mother. When she saw me there, her eyes widened. “Trent?”
“Ma’am.”
The door opened much wider, and she came partway out onto the porch. “Is Drew with you?” she asked hopefully, searching for her son.
“I came alone.”
A hand flew up to her throat. “I-is he okay?”
“Drew’s fine.” No thanks to you. Shaking my head, I discarded the thought. “I have something I’d like to say. I won’t take up much of your time.” Glancing at the watch on my wrist, I added, “I have to catch a flight back home in an hour.”
“You flew here because you wanted to talk?”
I shook my head. “Not talk. I just have something to say. Then I’m going home to my family.”
A flash of hurt could be seen deep in her eyes. I didn’t feel bad for her. I never would. Drew’s parents made their choices, and they would have to live with them.
I actually felt kinda sorry for these people because someday they would probably look around and realize all the shit they gave up. Someday they might look in the mirror and wonder who the hell was looking back.
Or maybe they might never know. Maybe their ignorance and intolerance would never change despite everything it cost them.
I couldn’t and wouldn’t concern myself with however it ended up for them. I was here right now for me. For me and me alone.
“Camden told me about the kids,” she whispered.
“Our kids.” I corrected. “Mine and Drew’s.”
She hesitated a moment, then said, “Do you have a picture?”
“Can I come in?”
“Of course,” she said, swinging the door wide and motioning me inside.
Burke was standing in the middle of the family room, staring at the door. “I told you to go.”
“Yeah,” I replied. “I know. I’ll go as soon as I say what I came to say.”
“I told you I don’t want to hear it.”
“I think after everything, the least you could do is give me five minutes.”
“Burke!” Adrienne scolded, coming into the room. “He flew all this way. At least hear him out.”
Burke slid a look at his very obedient wife, then back to me. “Hurry up.”
“Can I get you some coffee—”
“No.” Burke cut her off.
“Thanks for the offer,” I told her anyway.
This house looked exactly the same as when Drew and I came here to tell his parents about us. The day he was disowned. It felt different, though.
Emptier. Colder. Not at all like our family compound with the kids and dogs and people everywhere. Our walls nearly burst with love. I could feel it all the way here in North Carolina.
I drew strength from that and stepped forward.
Burke flinched.
I held out a hand, showing I meant no harm, then held it out, wanting to shake his hand. Incredulous, he stared between me and my outstretched arm.
After a few minutes of silence and no attempt to offer his hand, I pulled mine back.
“Thank you,” I said.
Both his parents stared in stupor.
I half smiled. “Surprising, right?”
“What kind of game are you playing?” Burke intoned.
“No game.” I shook my head. “I came because I wanted to thank you.”
“For what?” Adrienne asked.
“For making me stronger.”
They both stood there, not sure what to say. They didn’t have to say anything at all.
“If it wasn’t for you, I might never have expanded my world. Drew and I might have just lived together as we had been and never reached for more. I’d been scared all this time without realizing it. Scared to put us out there, to risk what we had. Scared someone would hurt him the way you have hurt me. I wanted nothing more than to shelter him. To love him.”
Listening, Drew’s mother sank down on the sofa, gripping the arm.
“Fate intervened. Fate showed me what life might be like without him. If you hadn’t come and forced us apart, if you hadn’t threatened to keep him from me, I might never have known.”
“Known what?” Adrienne asked.
I didn’t look at her, though. I watched Burke, who, though he tried to hide it, wanted to know what else I would say.
“Known that we were stronger than that. Stronger than your hate. I realized I couldn’t protect Drew from people like you. But we don’t have to bury ourselves to avoid your wrath. We can rise above it.”
I felt lighter already. Less burdened. Carrying around hate weighed so much. I was tired of bearing it. I didn’t have room anymore. I had a husband and two kids who would get all of me and nothing less.
“So thank you for giving me the courage to get married to someone I love more than myself. Thank you for showing me what kind of father I want to be. A father who loves his kids no matter what. A father who would do anything to make sure they are happy and safe. A father who will put aside his own prejudices for the sake of love.”
“Why, you little shit…” Burke swore, rushing me.
I didn’t flinch. I didn’t stare at the fist he had squeezed tight.
Adrienne jumped up, gasping. “Burke!”
“He’s taunting us,” he insisted.
I shook my head. “No. I’m not. I’m letting you know that I acknowledge the role you played in our lives. I’m putting it to bed. When I walk out of here today, it will be with no more hard feelings or ill will. You might have taught me how to hate, but your son…” I smiled, twisting the diamond band around on my finger. “Your son taught me how to love. And his love is so bright your hate is insignificant.”
His arm fell at his side. His fist unclenched. Unmistakable remorse flashed in his stare.
“That’s all I came to say. I have to go now. I have a plane to catch.”
I didn’t look back when I walked out the door. I didn’t have to. There was nothing behind me anymore.
Outside, the sun was bright, the air was warm. Halfway to the car, someone ran outside behind me, their rushed footsteps echoing across wood.
“Trent!” Adrienne called.
I stopped and turned, standing there in the sun while she remained in the shadows of the porch.
She swallowed thickly, tears dripping down her cheeks. She couldn’t speak, but I saw a lot on her face. I heard a lot in her expression.
I smiled. “You don’t have to worry about Drew. I’ll take care of him.”
Her lips rolled inward; her chest heaved. Then slowly, she nodded.
The house grew smaller and smaller in my rearview as I drove away. By the time it was gone, so was the rest of the weight I’d been carrying for years.
It felt good.
It felt right.
It felt like fate had most definitely found its way.
And fate? It was better than anything I could have ever imagined.
* * *
THE END
Author’s Note
This book was a long time coming. And when I say a long time, I mean years. Yes, years. I had the idea for this book probably about two years ago. I had the cover done a little over a year ago. This started document sat in my computer for months and months and months.
I kept everything about this book a secret. The plot. The fact that I was even considering another one. It was SO hard to keep this a secret because I was asked nearly every day when Trent and Drew would get another book. When would I write more for these guys?
At first, I said never. I’m done. But this idea kept on in the back of my head. Th
ey whispered that maybe I wasn’t done. And I wanted to write this book. Badly.
I’ve said it very often that Trent is my most favorite character. Trent & Drew are my favorite couple. Yes. Even over Romeo and Rimmel. Gasp. I will also say that in my own opinion and from my own standpoint, I think #Junkie and #Rev are my best books. I’m very proud of them, maybe because I never thought I could write a male/male romance story. Why? Well, for one thing, I’m not a gay man. How could I write in that perspective?
But guys… The passion I feel for this genre, for these guys, it is currently unmatched. The love this series and this couple specifically has gotten is incredible, and it means so much to me. Even if you can’t relate to them, it doesn’t matter because we all feel.
So because of my intense love, I sat on this book. I sat on this idea. I debated in my mind over and over and over again. Could I write this book? Could I do these boys justice? Could #Fate live up to #Junkie and #Rev (in my own eyes). What if I messed with “perfection?” What if I ruined the entire series with one bad book?
I was plagued with these questions. I almost didn’t write this. It took so much courage to finally just do it. I said, well, if it turns out bad, I won’t publish it. I won’t tell anyone I wrote it. I was inspired for the blurb by my own struggles with this story. “Why mess with perfection,” right?
On top of that, I knew this would be an emotional book for me. I didn’t want to put Trent through all this. I didn’t want him to hurt. I didn’t want people to be mean to him. I didn’t want to see Drew fighting for his life. And honestly, I didn’t want to piss off readers.
But I pushed on. I’m glad I did.
These boys deserve a beautiful ending. Even more beautiful than the one they had before. Yes, their life was amazing. Yes, they were happy. But there was so much left unsaid. Unfelt.
#Fate Page 33
