by Sabrina Kade
“You will find someone, Iriel. You deserve happiness too, you know.”
He huffs and steps backward. “There is no one here for me. Not anymore.”
My lips part, wanting to offer him soothing words or an apology, but Iriel has already spun away. He’s sprinting back toward the main lair. My heart aches for him because though I have found happiness, he hasn’t. He’s still alone. He still wants someone to talk to and someone to spend quiet nights in with. Iriel’s not a social butterfly, and I guess he enjoyed the fact that I was too frightened to be social with others.
That part of my life is over now.
Once the intensity floats away along with Iriel’s departure, several of the girls come closer.
“So, you… and Drazal? Official, right?” Kansas asks.
I blush and lower my head. “It’s official.”
She lets out a low whistle. “I’m glad to hear it.”
“Arizona will be happy too,” Dakota says.
“Who the fuck cares what Arizona thinks?” Kansas snarls, rolling her eyes, and ignoring the look of raw shock on Dakota’s face. “Whatever. I’m glad you stood up for yourself. If we’re on an assignment where we have a choice in the matter, why not take it? Hey, you know who will also be really happy to hear about this?”
I beam. “Layla and Sloane.”
She nods. “The very same. Jesus, sometimes I wish we had social media so we could update our relationship statuses. Someone went from it’s complicated to it’s official.” She snickers to herself, and though Dakota sneers and storms off, I don’t mind. Drazal is right back to my side and wrapping a warm, possessive arm around my shoulders.
I decide then I don’t want to make my decision about where to live because of Iriel. There’s only one place I want to live with my man. I picture Layla’s warm face and Sloane’s sly grin and how much Dolan and Exer bring out the best in everyone. All the pregnant ladies are at the first lair and that’s where I want to be. I don’t want to hide away in the second lair, ashamed for not Choosing Iriel as my mate. I don’t want to bury my feelings. I want to be with the girls who got me to this point. I wouldn’t be here if not for Layla, Sloane, and even Celeste.
They’re the ones I want to be with and having Drazal is the frosting on the already decadent cake.
I smile at my alien mate, pride beaming through my very being. He’s beside me now and nothing will keep us apart. And though I’m not sure I’m pregnant yet, the thought no longer fills me with dread. I want to see if I can look as happy as Layla and Sloane. I want to watch Drazal watch me grow bigger the same way Dolan looks at Layla. I want—
“Oh, by the way,” Kansas says. “When you get back to the other lair, you should be prepared. There’s a new face.”
“A new face?” I cock my head to the side and steal a look up at Drazal who’s looking down at Kansas curiously.
“Yeah. Another Sidyth.”
“Another Sidyth,” Drazal repeats.
Kansas nods. “Yeah. A real big one too. Kind of makes me nervous about what else is out there, you know? I mean, it’s common knowledge there’s other Sidyths here, but now that one is staying with us? When are the rest going to come?” She claps me once on the shoulder before spinning toward Dakota, and my mouth is dry trying to process everything she’s said.
Another Sidyth. A big one. That can only mean…
“Chocal,” Drazal mutters. “Why would—”
“Why would he come back? I asked before and he refused. What’s changed?”
“I don’t know,” he admits. “I guess we’re about to find out. That is where we’re going to live, right? You want to go back to Prince Korben’s lair, yes?”
I break out into a toothy grin. I still think I should feel a little guilty about potentially shoving my relationship with Drazal under Iriel’s nose, but I’m done hiding and skulking around. I want to be with Layla and Sloane. I want Drazal to be around the others he looks up to like Hujun and Azan. And though he’s not saying anything, I get the feeling he knows exactly who Chocal is.
Deciding these are all questions and concerns that can be asked another day, I nod up at Drazal with a smile on my face.
No more second guessing. Drazal says I deserve happiness.
For the first time, I think he’s right.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Phoebe
Almost three months have passed, and I swear I’m about to burst. It’s not fair. Back home, I’d barely be into the second trimester, but I’m so bloated and miserable I wonder why I agreed to be Drazal’s mate in the first place. How the hell did Layla and Sloane do it? Maybe it’s not only their mates that give them power, it’s Layla’s childbearing hips and Sloane’s… optimism, maybe?
Either way, I’m feeling particularly grumpy, and Drazal is out somewhere with Dolan and Exer, checking on that thing called Hinda.
So I’m left alone for a few hours and after deciding I can no longer take the misery and silence of our lair, I pass through the privacy curtain and head toward the main lair opening.
The first person I see has to be pretty close to the top of the list of people I don’t want to see, though.
“Iriel,” I mutter, absently rubbing my stomach almost as a reminder that I’m taken and there’s nothing he can do about it. Still, I’m nervous when he tilts his head to the side as though curious and edges toward me. I’m not afraid of him. That’s not the right word. It feels as though there’s still so much baggage between us. He didn’t leave the first lair after finding out that Drazal and I were staying there. He avoided me. Us. Everyone. I glance around when he stops a few feet in front of me. “How… how are you?”
He frowns at me, or rather, my stomach before rounding back to my eyes. “Not as well as you are doing, I see.”
I try not to bark out a sarcastic laugh. “You’ve obviously never been pregnant before.”
“I have not. But it is something I wish to be part of very much.” There’s a trace of sadness in his voice that almost breaks my heart. Ugh. Iriel isn’t a bad person. He’s not. He’s… intense.
“I still think there’s someone out there for you, Iriel. You have to not come on so strong. Desperation isn’t cute, you know,” I tack on, hoping to lighten the mood.
He hisses, but it’s not a scary sound. Only huffy. “I understand. You may not want to hear this, but I wish it could have been you. I understand now that it was not meant to be. You Chose Drazal. And though it brings me much pain on some days, each one gets easier. I must admit, I do not mind seeing you happy and smiling lately, though it is not with me.”
His words bring a soft smile to my face. “Does this mean we’re cool?”
Iriel shakes his head. “Humans are warm to the touch. They always will be.”
“No, I mean,” I tack on with an embarrassed giggle, “we’re okay, right? We can be friends?” My voice hitches at the end because I’m asking a lot. But it’s been months since our last interaction, and I’m pregnant so there isn’t really any reason for us not to move forward.
But Iriel shakes his head. “I do not mind seeing you smiling and happy with another,” he repeats. “This does not mean I am comfortable being your friend.”
“O-oh,” I stammer, feeling a painfully familiar prickle in the corners of my eyes. “Okay. Well, have a good one then.” I try to move past him when he seizes my arm in a light grip.
“Wait,” he says. I notice his eyes are pinched shut. “I mean to say I’m not comfortable being your friend yet. But in the future? Yes. I would like us to be friends.”
“I guess that’s best I can hope for,” I say, pinching my tears away and gently pulling my arm out of his grasp. “I appreciate that. I’m so sorry again—”
“You do not need to be sorry. Like you both said months ago. You have Chosen Drazal. He Chose you long before that.” Despite how much time has passed the words still sound as though they bring him great pain. I want nothing more than to say something, but there isn’t much left to be said.
>
I can’t be with him. He can’t be with me. And though I want him to find happiness, there’s nothing I can do to make that happen.
Iriel says nothing else before turning, and I watch his retreating back, wishing there was more I could offer. But other than finding him a mate, there isn’t much I can do. I can only hope there’s someone out there for him. Someone who can make him feel the way Drazal makes me feel. Because despite everything, Iriel deserves happiness as much as the next person. Maybe more so.
Licking my lips, I waddle on, heading toward the cave opening and sure enough, Celeste and Glykoran are there, talking softly. I still can’t figure out what to make of them, and Glykoran’s more on edge than usual lately, stalking around as though he’s trying to wear a hole in the dirt. Celeste is trying to comfort him, but he keeps pushing her aside. Huh. I keep my distance, not wanting to disturb, and I can’t help feeling a little guilty that I’m hearing parts of their conversation.
“It is bad for Chocal to be here,” Glykoran grumbles. “We are receiving a delivery in a few planetary rotations. This cannot be a coincidence. Months have been spent building relationships. The females and the others are too trusting. Prince Korben says there is grave news. I can only imagine what is happening at the fatherland.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Celeste offers. “There’s nothing we can do now—”
“How can you ask me not to worry about it?” he hisses back. “They are punishing families. I should not be here. I should be there. With them. I couldn’t risk it—”
“You’re going to drive yourself crazy with what if’s, Kor. Please. Relax—”
“I will not relax!” he roars, batting her arm away. “I do not know why I keep hoping you will understand. You will never understand. I have a mate.”
“You don’t love her,” Celeste says.
“She is still my mate. I have a sprog—”
“Yes, but you can’t deny there’s something here—”
“Leave me,” he hisses, stomping away. I barely manage to duck my pregnant ass out of sight, so he doesn’t catch me eavesdropping.
Well, shit. Kind of wished I didn’t hear all that.
I emerge from the shadows, hoping Celeste didn’t hear me approach, and thankfully, she doesn’t seem as though she did. Relief washes over, but not for long because Celeste sniffles loudly when I grow near.
“What did you hear?” she asks when her eyes meet mine. She sniffs hard, rubbing at her eyes and nose.
“Nothing. I’m slow.” I rub my swollen belly to prove my point.
Satisfied, she shakes her head. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to snap. Ugh, there’s so much shit going on, and Kor is worried something happened back home with his family and… God. I shouldn’t be talking to you about any of this. It’s not your problem.” Like magic, her tears are gone, and she’s back to her normal, if not slightly sullen self. “I’m sure it’s nothing. How’s pregnant life going?”
I shrug, still unsure if this is the best way to handle what I saw and heard, but if Celeste doesn’t want to talk, I can’t force her. I decide to pocket my questions for now and be a distraction for Celeste’s worries.
“Not terrible. I’m getting fat.”
She rolls her eyes. “Like you’re capable of getting fat. No. You look great. You all do.” A sad smile crosses her face, and I swear her eyes water. I take a step closer, wishing so badly I had the forwardness to butt into her business, but the words don’t come. Instead, Celeste juts her chin toward the fields. “Chocal is a strange one, right?”
I frown, taking in the stranger. He’s out there with a few of the women from the second lair, and though he’s been living here for a while, I don’t know anything about him. Drazal’s admitted that they were friends back on the fatherland, but that’s it. I press my lips into a thin line, when Celeste speaks again.
“Your man’s back. You see him?”
I follow her eyes, and sure enough, Drazal is pushing past the last of the trees and into the field separating the two lairs. A goofy smile crosses my face seeing him. Celeste says pregnancy looks good on me, and well, I have to say it looks incredible on Drazal. Since he found out from Chentan that I’m carrying, it’s like the universe has decided to bulk him up to prepare for taking care of a child. His muscles have exploded to something only a few levels smaller than Hujun’s, and I swear he’s shot up at least five inches. He’s taller than Dolan now, and this drives him crazy, especially when I see him trying to lock my man up in a headlock, which he easily evades with a smile.
Then Drazal’s eyes find mine.
This alien. He belongs to me. I belong to him.
I don’t care if I’m three months pregnant, I sprint toward him like he’s returned from war. The conversation with Iriel and the one I overhead with Celeste has only reminded me how lucky I am to have this alien by my side. He sweeps me into his arms like something straight out of a sweeping epic romance film, and I kiss him deeply, relieved that out of so many of the girls here, I’m one of the lucky ones.
“You are pleased to see me,” Drazal notes. “Is all well?”
Man can read me like a book. But that’s okay. I have nothing to hide. As he strides back to our shared lair, I inform him of everything. I can’t keep secrets from him. I tell him about my conversation with Iriel and what I heard about Glykoran and Celeste. I mention that some of the girls are curious about Chocal’s timing to return to the lairs. Drazal nods, listening patiently, but all the while, he’s slowly removing his and my clothes. Part of me wants to shrill that he should listen, and that he’s only looking to distract me, but if there’s one thing I’ve found about carrying a Sidyth’s baby, it’s that the hormones make me horny as hell.
I give up on talking for a little while, practically ripping my top off and casting it to the corner of the room. Our room.
Drazal’s tongue slicks through his lips and he grins. “You are looking glorious with those extra curves.”
He plumps each of my breasts to prove his point, and I have to say he isn’t wrong. I’ve gone from a small B to almost a DD, and I couldn’t be happier. I feel shapely, curvy and womanly. Though I’m miserable sometimes, it’s okay when I have moments like this.
“I must touch you, Phoebe.”
“You already are,” I say, smirking. He continues kneading my breasts until his hands eventually fall to my rounded stomach. I love watching him look at my swelling belly. There’s a peacefulness. A serenity. This is what he wants. Me. Us. A family. Together. My heart nearly bursts from the tenderness of his gaze. “You can touch me more if you like.”
“I would like that.” He works closer to my sex, but his attention dips up to mine. “You were saying things earlier though. Do you wish to talk about them now?”
Yes, there are probably things we should talk about. The mysteries surrounding Chocal and why he came back to the lairs. Glykoran’s worries. The delivery shipment and the bad news. Not to mention I’m still worried about Iriel. I wish I could shut off these worries with a switch sometimes, but I was with the guy for several months. I’m not a cyborg. I worry about him…
Despite all that, my wanting to have a discussion flies out the window when I see how hard my alien is already. With no fabric restraining his manhood, his glorious cock is presented, and my lady parts want nothing more than to pull that thing inside me for a tight hug and never let go.
There will be time to talk.
There will be time to face all these worries.
But not right this second.
“I need you inside me first; otherwise, I’m never going to be able to focus,” I admit. “Pregnancy makes me horny as hell.”
Drazal laughs and pushes me down gently on the bed before his eyes widen as though something’s occurred to him. “Your belly is much bigger now. Will this position be comfortable for you? Or would you like to ride me today?”
I think for a moment before breaking out into a grin. “I have a better idea.”
Not waiting for him to respond, I situate myself on the bed on my hands and knees and present my ass and pussy to him. “This should do the trick. Aliens know what doggie style is, right?” I glance over my shoulder, and Drazal’s taking in the view like he’s seeing the eighth wonder of the world. I have to say, it’s a bit of a turn on to be looked at like this. The sensitive spot between my thighs grows damp and Drazal’s tongue darts from his lips to taste the air around him.
“I do not understand the term doggie style,” he admits, “but I assure you that I am a fast learner.” He draws closer, and the tip of his cock grazes my core.
Oh yes. He’ll be able to figure this out in no time.
It’s taken me a long time to get here, but it’s like Drazal’s said. Everything that came before brought us here and that’s what makes it all worth it. And though there’s much to discuss, behind this curtain my world is as it should be. I have a man who thinks I’m the suns, moons, and stars. He worships me. I worship him too. He brought me back out of my shell. Again. Without him, I wouldn’t be the little spitfire Layla refers to me as today. I love the nickname. I love being here with the girls because despite pregnancy making me miserable sometimes, I'm not alone.
I have girlfriends.
Most importantly, I have Drazal, who’s always said I deserve happiness. He never forced me to be with him. He said I needed to find happiness on my own.
I have. And it’s with him. Here on Hethdiss – a planet filled with exiled aliens.
Space whore, no more, I think with a chuckle.
“Ahh, there it is. I have found it,” Drazal declares loudly right before thrusting into my folds. He laughs, insisting that he’s joking as I cry out when his cock invades and fills me.
I’ve found it, too, I say to myself. Only instead of my entrance, what I’ve found, is happiness.
Thank you, Drazal. Thank you for letting me find happiness on my own, just like you found the right hole, apparently.
The End
Please check out book 1 in the Rebels of Sidyth series,
