by Lea Linnett
“You do that,” she said with a hiss. “It would be way more preferable.”
Kamanek laughed, the movement making the compact muscles of his stomach jump, and Taz should really not have been noticing that. “Quit distracting me,” she said, brandishing her food like a weapon and trying to shoo him from the window without touching him. “This isn’t a goddamn vacation—it’s a mission.”
“I’m of the opinion that work should involve equal parts business and pleasure,” he said, grin widening.
“The pleasure comes when we burn that place to the ground,” Taz snapped. “Anything else is a distraction.”
Kamanek’s expression froze, his body stilling, and they were still too close. At this distance, she could count the scales spread across his chest if there weren’t so many of them.
“What?” she asked, unnerved.
His pupils contracted slightly, refocusing on her. “You know, that’s not the first time I’ve heard that, but I disagree. Sex doesn’t have to be anything more than stress relief, and don’t you think you’d function a little better after some stress relief? After a release?”
“No, I think it would dull the senses.”
“But boredom dulls the senses, right?” His voice deepened again, and Taz was suddenly rather preoccupied with the way his throat worked when he swallowed. “That’s just as dangerous.”
What was dangerous was how Taz felt trapped in his orbit, unable to pull away or do anything much other than squeeze the life out of her sandwich at her side. “If you want an excuse to fuck on the job, maybe you should go see that Jonson guy about a position in the brothel. You’d be the one person there who actually enjoys servicing customers.”
Kamanek’s lip quirked, and she expected him to bite back, ready with some quip about the females he’d bedded sounding like they enjoyed their job tremendously. But instead, he stepped away, moving to sit on the cot. Taz heaved in a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, and it took her a moment to trust herself to sit down without her legs trembling.
She glared at him as she sat. “What, no snappy reply?”
He settled himself back on the cot, sparing her only a glance. “I’m tired. Unlike you, I was working last night.”
A pang of irritation rattled through her, and she sniffed. “Enjoy your beauty sleep, then.”
“I will.”
“And would you put a shirt on?” She kept her eyes on the warehouse as she said it, ignoring the way Kamanek’s head whipped round like he’d caught her out.
“To sleep?” he asked. “Am I that distracting?”
“You’re that gross.”
He snorted, but shrugged off the insult. “Hey, Firecracker.”
His tone was more serious this time, and she found herself looking over at him despite knowing better. “What?”
“You promise to keep me safe while I sleep?” he asked playfully, cocking his head to the side. “You are my bodyguard, after all.”
“Yeah, sure.”
She realized too late that she was smiling, and did her best to school her features into something more serious. Being around the levekk was like battling a thunderstorm, the wind batting her from all sides and sending her emotions in all different directions. She never felt fully stable on her feet around him, never felt fully in control.
But she had to admit, at least it was a cure for the boredom.
14
They fell into a kind of routine over the next few days as they waited for their backup to arrive. Kamanek watched through the night and slept through the day, and the warehouse remained as lifeless as ever, no one coming in or out. He assumed they had food stockpiled down there; the levekk security wouldn’t need it, but the humans certainly would.
And they would need a lot of it, if Taz was any indication. It was like eating a full meal had unlocked her body’s hunger, and he woke on their first afternoon in the flophouse to the low growl of her stomach. It sounded more like the purring of a sehela kit than anything he’d expect from a human. Taz’s face flamed when he asked about it, which only heightened the similarities to the temperamental felines.
She was even more embarrassed when he insisted on leaving again to buy her another of the cheap pindarro sanniches from down the street, but that didn’t stop her from accepting a third when he ventured out the next morning, his eyes bleary from trying to focus on the warehouse through the binoculars all night.
He didn’t procure any food for himself—he didn’t need it—and it was strange to him, how much he enjoyed the act of fetching something just for her. He’d spent so long as a mercenary just looking out for himself, and so long before that having no responsibilities apart from keeping his own body in peak condition, that looking after someone else was new to him.
It sent a warmth through him that he couldn’t name, made him feel useful and skilled in a way that he rarely felt outside of the sheets and which was far more rewarding than besting someone in combat or making a killing shot. It was confusing in its newness, but he didn’t dwell on it. It was akin to the pride he felt when he made another person come around his lips and tongue, when he spent entire nights focusing solely on someone else’s pleasure, to the point where he ignored his own needs.
He liked to give, he reasoned. And helping out this human who refused to admit when she needed help was just the newest thing he’d discovered that satisfied him.
It didn’t have to mean anything more than that.
“Where the fuck are they?” Taz complained to herself on their third day in the flophouse. Kamanek squeezed one eye open to find her flipping through messages on her comm with gritted teeth, scratching at her reddened shoulder. He didn’t mind being woken up. He’d gotten a few hours in before Taz’s muffled curses grew loud enough to wake him, so he wasn’t irritated by it. Rather, he enjoyed the chance to watch her for a little while before she noticed him.
He found her fidgeting entertaining, but it was also beginning to concern him. He’d been a sniper in the military, so patience was one of the few useful things they’d taught him. Taz didn’t seem to have nearly so good a grasp on it.
The longer they went with no word from the Lodestars, the worse she became. She paced often, cracked her knuckles incessantly, and the itching from the chem-shower seemed to bother her more and more. She’d even begun to sleep fitfully the last couple of nights, tossing and turning and making the cot creak beneath her.
The cot’s hinges groaned anew as he sat up, meeting the human’s irritated gaze when her head snapped up to look at him.
“You’re awake?”
“Hard to sleep with you talking to yourself all day,” he said, stretching the muscles of his neck and shoulders. “You know, grumbling won’t make them arrive any sooner.”
“I know that.” Her brow furrowed. “Sorry.”
“‘Sorry?’ You must be out of sorts,” he teased. He stood, stretching his arms over his head now, and he didn’t miss how Taz’s gaze followed him, studying his form. He couldn’t always read her fathomless eyes, but he was beginning to understand that the way her eyelids dropped to half-cover them was a sign of desire. Her dark eyelashes fluttered for a moment, her thoughts elsewhere, before she straightened again and turned back to the window.
He loved those heated looks she gave him when she thought he wasn’t watching. They were a crack in her fierce facade, a hint of her attraction to him. But they usually weren’t so lingering.
“You seem tired,” he said gently. “Want me to take over for a while?”
She blinked at him, looking like she didn’t know whether to thank him or insult him. “I’m fine, thank you. I don’t need any favors.”
“It’s not a favor,” he pressed. “I’m wide awake, and you look like you could use a break.”
Her eyebrows flattened into a disgruntled line. “I don’t need a break. I’m perfectly capable of doing my share.”
He tongued the back of his teeth, a flash of irritation flaring inside him. He
r desire to do everything by herself was admirable, but she’d delayed his shifts at the window too often in the last few days. “Yeah, but a break would be nice. We’ll switch halfway through the night if you want.”
He reached for her, and she batted his hand away, standing from the bench. “That’s not necessary,” she growled. “I’m fine.”
This close, he could see the red scratches on her shoulder from her fingernails, and he hummed with concern. “You showered this morning, and yet your skin is still irritated?”
“It’s…” She faltered, glancing up at him. “It’s taking longer to go away, sometimes. That’s all. It’s just… boredom. Stress.”
Her skin was hot beneath his hand when he hovered it over her, and he had an idea. “May I?”
A frown as she looked distrustfully from him to his hand, but she nodded.
Kamanek imagined he could hear the sizzle as he placed his fingertips over the rash. Taz tensed beneath him, a shiver running down her spine, and then her eyes widened. “It’s… cool.”
“We run a little colder than humans,” he murmured, gently soothing the searing patch of skin. She was so soft, even here, where her muscle and bone were most pronounced. “Is it helping?”
She breathed out a sigh, the tension in her body melting away slightly. “It… is, actually.”
“Does anywhere else need my healing touch?” he joked, chuckling when Taz’s cheeks stained red. A scratching noise met Kamanek’s ears, and he noticed her itching at a spot on her wrist. “Here,” he said, taking her wrist in his hand. “Better?”
“…Yes.”
“Don’t sound so pleased.”
She made a disgruntled noise, but she didn’t pull away. Her cheeks remained pink as she watched his hands caress her skin, and Kamanek couldn’t stop staring. She was so attractive, with her olive skin and her dark eyes. Her full lips were gently parted, her features softer than usual, but her eyes glinted when they flicked up to meet his again, as if a flame were burning inside them.
He was reaching out before he could stop himself, cupping her cheek with a hand. Her skin was hot enough to burn him, but he didn’t flinch, and to his surprise she leaned into the touch, her eyes slipping closed. For a moment, he could hear nothing but their soft breathing, and the gentle flutter of her pulse in her wrist as he continued to grasp it.
Then, she seemed to realize what she was doing, and she jumped back with a gasp.
He wanted to pull her back to him, to feel that heat against every scale on his body, but he knew he couldn’t. He would flirt and tease, but he could never force her. Taz was an inferno; a beacon in the darkness drawing him closer as much as a wall of flame keeping him out. It had to be her choice whether she softened it enough to let him in, or he’d lose everything about her that he admired.
That didn’t mean he would back down, however. “There’s purple beneath your eyes,” he said, studying her face. “And the whites have turned pink. You should sleep.”
Taz scoffed and looked away. “What do you know about human anatomy?”
“Not much. But I know that the symptoms only appeared after you stopped sleeping at night,” he said. “So, sleep.”
“I can’t sleep,” she admitted, baring her teeth. The stillness from moments before was gone, and she itched at a spot on her neck. “Every time I lie there, I think about those humans in the warehouse. I think about Mila and the Lodestars, and about how we’re still waiting. Anything could be happening down there while we just sit here. And when it’s not that, it’s—” She cut herself off, the flush on her cheeks traveling to the rest of her face as she looked him up and down.
“Yes?” he asked, smiling.
“Shut up.”
“My offer still stands, you know,” he murmured. “I could help you take your mind off the boredom. And the itching from the chem-shower.”
She blinked up at him. “How can you be so casual about it?” she asked. “Is sex really that meaningless to you?”
“Not at all,” he said. “It means a lot to me. It’s a way of showing trust, of relaxing, of clearing the mind.”
“But then you offer it up like fucking candy,” she said.
Kamanek laughed, shaking his head. “Only when I’m attracted to someone. I don’t see the point in being coy. Why waste time hiding how I feel, when that time could be better spent with the person I desire?”
She watched him carefully. “And you desire me?”
“How could I not?” he asked, pressing a little closer. He placed a hand on her collarbone, slowly enough that she could evade it if she wished.
She didn’t, and her breath hitched under his touch.
“You’re beautiful,” he said. “Strong. You don’t hide what you’re feeling, and you don’t care what others think. I admire that.”
“That’s not completely true.”
“I think it is.” He trailed his claw up her throat and felt her swallow against him. “And if it isn’t, make it so.”
“I don—”
“What are you so afraid of?” he asked. “It’s not me, or you would never have dared to attack me before. And I’m not the first male you’ve had.” Her eyes blazed, and this close, he could see the black circles of her pupils spinning in her eyes, dilated with lust just like his own. He thumbed her full lower lip, wishing he could capture her soft intake of breath with his own. “I think you’re just as curious as I am, but you’ve convinced yourself I’m off-limits.”
She glared. “You are off-limits. You’re levekk.”
“But what does that matter? I’m not asking for love,” he added, the familiar words tasting strangely ashen in his mouth. “I’m not asking for you to tell everyone you know about us. We’re alone here. We might as well enjoy our time together.”
“What makes you think I’d enjoy it?” she asked, her eyes gleaming with challenge.
His blood was on fire, and it made him pull her until their hips were flush, his hard length pressing into her belly. “I’m eager to please,” he growled. “And trust me when I say that my size hasn’t caused me to neglect working on my skill.”
She licked her lips, her breaths mingling with his as they had in the alleyway a few days earlier. He’d been so close to kissing her then, and he ached to do so now. But Taz’s gaze had dropped down to their connected bodies, her heart pounding against his chest. Still uncertain.
He grazed his thumb over the ragged scars that crossed her cheek, leaning away from her so she’d have room to breathe. “If you really don’t want this, tell me. I’ll leave you alone—permanently—and we can spar for twenty minutes, instead,” he said lightly. “Although we might attract some attention with all the thumping and bumping.”
She stared at him a moment longer, her gaze distant, and then placed a hand on his chest. The touch was hesitant, gentler than he was used to from her, but it soon turned firm. Her fingers flexed, the knuckles bending…
And she pushed him away.
He backed up immediately, even though he felt the loss of her touch like a physical blow.
Taz sank back down to the bench, her brows drawn together in confusion, but her words were clear when she said, “I can’t…”
Kamanek nodded, smiling easily and turning away from her, willing his body to calm. He needed to go for a walk, he decided, and give them both some space, but the tense line of Taz’s body drew his eye.
She was looking out at the warehouse again, her back abnormally straight, and there was no denying the stiffness in her neck and shoulders. His offer aside, he wished he could help her in some way. Kamanek didn’t have to be human to know that her obsession with the mission was growing unhealthy. He’d seen it before in young soldiers who’d been recently reprimanded. They thought success was the only way to prove their worth, and wouldn’t accept that success wasn’t worth it if they collapsed as a result.
He drew in a long, slow breath. “I’m going out for a while,” he said to Taz’s back, and she peered over her shoulder
at him. “Don’t work too hard.”
It was hard to tell with her silhouetted like this, but he thought he saw her lip quirk as she raised a hand. He didn’t dwell. Instead, he grabbed his things and left the room.
He had a plan to help her relax. He just hoped she’d be more amenable to that than she was to a quick fuck.
15
Taz jumped when a soft knock sounded at the door, her shoulders hiking up around her ears.
She’d been tense ever since Kamanek left—since long before that, if she was honest—and the prospect of an unknown visitor didn’t help calm her. If it was the Lodestars, they would have called ahead, and Kamanek had a key. He hadn’t bothered knocking once since they moved in here.
She circled the bench, grabbing her handgun from beneath the bed and silently loading it. Her footfalls were soft as she approached the door, listening for any sign of how many assailants awaited her.
The silence was broken by another knock, louder this time, and she hugged the doorframe. She opened the door one-handed, her gun ready in the other but hidden out of sight.
“Good afternoon.”
She sighed at the sight of Kamanek standing before her, her posture relaxing. “The hell are you doing?” she asked in a hiss. “I almost shot you.”
He flashed a grin, shrugging, and she noticed that his hands were hidden behind his back. “I have a surprise for you. It needed a little drama.”
“Oh yeah?” she asked skeptically.
He brought his hands forward with a flourish, revealing a bottle in each. The left one was the familiar blue of senathar, a common, non-alcoholic mixer with a sweet taste that Taz had been partial to when she worked at the hub. The right was a deep, blood-red bottle with a pale cork and a metal cage holding it in place. She recognized it immediately. The liquid inside was as red as the bottle, and had a fire-like burn as it slid down your throat; Kirena, her favorite whiskey.
Kamanek cocked his head. “Impressed?”
