I pressed the call button and put the phone up to my ear.
“Did they kick those assholes out? Swear to God, if they’ve upset her, I will—”
“It’s me,” I cut him off.
Tears pricked my eyes but inside warmth bloomed. That was my Holden, the old Holden, the one who had shielded me from everything. Hearing his fury on my behalf made me remember all that I lost.
Will the pain ever go away?
“Are they gone?” he asked. His tone was much softer than it’d been.
“Yeah, Jonny threatened to arrest my mother. In true Zoe fashion, she said her parting shot and walked out like she owned the place and it was her decision. How’s Faith? What did the doctor say?”
That was what had started the whole argument with my mother earlier. Faith had to be checked out by a physician, and since I wasn’t there in person to consent, I had to assign Holden medical power of attorney. I hadn’t thought twice about it when I was brought the papers to sign. He was with her and I trusted him to do right by her. My mother had gone ballistic.
“She’s fine.” I could hear the smile in his voice and tried my best to ignore it. “They found doxylamine in her system. It’s an antihistamine and the main side effect is drowsiness, which explains her ten-hour nap. She’s awake but groggy. Sheriff Knox understands that Faith’s not to be questioned until you’re present. The Towlers are being held in Albemarle County until Jonny can arrange to have them brought back to Kent County. Jameson and Rhode caught Chad sneaking out the back. He’s in county lock-up as well. All three of them have clammed up and asked for lawyers. McKenna should’ve already been in contact with your attorney to explain the situation and Jonny has filed for a restraining order. As soon as the judge signs it, he’ll bring you the paperwork. That will be for both you and Faith. Even though we don’t believe you or Faith are in danger with the Towlers in custody, Jonny has posted a deputy outside your door and he made arrangements with the hospital to allow Faith to remain in your room with you for the duration of your stay. As soon as Faith’s doctor signs her discharge papers, we’ll be on our way back to you.”
She’s fine.
Faith was fine.
That was all I could process. The rest—all the arrangements Jonny had made—barely filtered in. Not because I wasn’t grateful, but because my baby was okay and that took up everything I had left.
“How much did she see?”
“Leigh-Leigh, honey, I haven’t asked and I won’t. She’ll need her mama when she talks about that. Right now, all we’re doing is test what flavor Jell-O she likes best and slowly getting something in her belly. So far, she likes strawberry the best and spit out the lime. Everyone’s taking good care of her. One of the nurses went to the pediatric unit and brought her down a stuffed sloth and a book. Between Jell-O tastings, we’ve been learning about the rainforest.”
I felt it happening. My throat clogged with emotion and the sob tore from my soul. Holden was reading to my baby, feeding her Jell-O, and taking care of her discharge paperwork. No one had ever cared for Faith like that but me. God, why did it have to be Holden who was taking care of her? Why was I still being punished? I was supposed to be untying myself, falling out of love, and now I’d never forget the kindness he was showing Faith. I’d never, ever forget he’d rescued her.
“Charleigh?” he called.
“Thank you.”
“There’s nothing to thank me for.”
He was wrong. There was so much gratitude welling up inside of me it was overwhelming. Faith was safe. She was being well cared for in my absence. And she was coming home.
14
“Holden?”
“Yeah, doll?”
Holden looked over at Faith when she didn’t continue, her pretty face illuminated by the screen of his phone. He was sitting in the back seat of Jameson’s truck next to the little girl, something she’d demanded with a savage scream. Without another thought, Holden had gathered Faith in his arms and held her until her little body stopped shaking with fear, then he’d climbed into the back seat next to her and held her hand. Once she’d calmed down, he’d downloaded some games onto his phone so Faith had something to occupy herself with. That was two hours ago. They still had a little over an hour to go. Some of the tension had ebbed once they were on the highway headed back to Maryland but he knew he wouldn’t be able to fully relax until he reunited mother and daughter.
That was the newest lie he told himself. The truth was, the knot in his stomach wouldn’t unwind until he saw Charleigh. Yes, he wanted to see mother and daughter safely together, but the last time he’d had eyes on Charleigh she’d been unconscious. He’d spoken to her over the phone almost hourly to update her on Faith, so logically he knew she was okay, but he still needed to see her.
“I’m hungry.”
Well, damn, Holden wasn’t sure what to do with that. The doctor had given Faith a clean bill of health and no restrictions, but he didn’t have the first clue what to feed an eight-year-old. Not to mention, it was nearing on midnight.
“Hey, Jameson, can you stop at the next fast food place you see?”
“Mommy says I’m not allowed to eat fast food.”
“Well, kiddo, at this time of night that’s all we got.”
Faith lifted her eyes and the tiny, rebellious smile hit Holden like a semi. Honest to God, how was it even possible for this girl to smile about anything hours after she’d been rescued from a kidnapping? But that wasn’t the only thing that had hit Holden square in the chest with such force, he was happy he was sitting down or he would’ve been knocked on his ass. That small smile, the one that said Faith was down to break all the rules—consequences be damned, was one he would swear he’d seen before. The same grin that had pissed his mother off and told his teammates he was getting ready to do something crazy.
Or was it wishful thinking? Was it his mind playing tricks on him because for years he’d wished Faith was his?
Coveting your neighbor’s wife was a sin—surely coveting your dead teammate’s daughter was as well—but it still didn’t stop Holden from staring at the little girl in fascination.
“Mommy gets me milkshakes on special occasions,” Faith announced.
“Okay…”
“I think you saving me from having to live with Grandma and Aunt Patty is bigger than me getting straight As. So I don’t think Mommy will say anything about me eating McDonald's.”
Holden smiled down at the girl.
“I like the way you think, doll.”
“I’m a good thinker.”
Jameson chuckled, Faith smiled hugely, and Holden’s heart swelled.
It was a horrible idea to get close to Charleigh’s daughter. The pain would be atrocious. But right then, sitting next to Faith, he wanted to know everything about her. He wanted to spend the next hour hearing her talk. And he really wanted to see her smile.
So that’s what he did. Jameson pulled through a McDonald’s, Faith ate her Chicken McNuggets, sipped her milkshake, and Holden listened to her prattle on about anything and everything. By the time they pulled into the hospital parking lot, he knew her favorite food was Charleigh’s homemade tacos, her favorite movie was Barbie Island Princess, her favorite animal was a dog, and she wanted a Tank of her own. He’d learned that Faith wished her mommy would grow a baby in her belly so she could feel it kick like she’d felt touching her Aunt Kennedy’s belly. Faith had been clear she never wanted to see the mean Towlers again and she didn’t like her other grandparents because they weren’t any fun. Her favorite color was red, her favorite person was her mom, and she loved math, hated spelling, and she wanted to be an astronaut when she grew up.
And somewhere deep inside of himself, in a dark place he’d never admit to out loud, he felt sorry that Paul would never know those things about his daughter. But Holden was immensely grateful he did. Even if Charleigh never allowed Faith around him again, he’d never forget all of Faith’s favorite things.
From his
seat in the corner of Charleigh’s hospital room, Holden looked away from mother and daughter cuddling on the small, twin-sized bed down to his watch and stood.
It was after three in the morning; the last seventeen hours had been harrowing but it was the last two that had taken it out of him. Witnessing Charleigh and Faith’s tear-filled reunion drained nearly everything he had left.
Kennedy had stayed by Charleigh throughout the whole ordeal. McKenna had stayed until Chad and the Towlers were taken into custody. However, when Jameson, Holden, and Faith arrived at the hospital they were greeted by the whole team, sleepy kids included. The gesture had hit him hard—they’d all come to welcome Faith home. No one except Nixon had gone up to Charleigh’s room, but in a show of support, they’d all gotten out of bed, awakened their children, and had been waiting for them in the parking lot.
Faith seemed to bloom under the attention. The girl was simply amazing. She passed out hugs, smiled, then very sweetly asked if she could see her mom.
Two things had struck a chord, and if Holden was being honest, both washed over him with staggering force—neither he’d ever forget. Even though Faith had gamely hugged the crowd, she remained close to Holden. And when she was ready to go up to her mom’s room, Faith had reached out and held his hand. It wasn’t until they entered Charleigh’s room did Faith let go of his hand and rush to the bed. But Charleigh hadn’t missed the handholding. Her eyes had done a scan of her daughter, pausing on their clasped hands. Tears formed that she’d swiped away before smiling brightly.
Nixon, Jameson, and Kennedy left shortly after Faith climbed up next to Charleigh and yawned. Surprisingly, the girl hadn’t fallen asleep—instead, Holden had settled into a chair and soaked up every word Faith said. The rambling commentary covered everything except what had happened. Though she did rat Holden out about her midnight snack. When Charleigh’s gaze went to Holden and her pretty lips twitched, his heart swelled.
Getting too close wasn’t smart, but it was too late. Faith Towler had wormed her way into his heart, and that hurt worse than all the years he’d studiously avoided her. Maybe he could play the doting uncle. Maybe he could spend time with Faith like Nixon did. Maybe he could come up with a cute nickname for her like Jameson had.
Maybe, just maybe, he didn’t have to give up Faith.
Or, maybe he needed to walk away now before they were all drowning in more pain.
The thought made Holden’s chest physically ache.
Yeah, it was way too late to pull away now.
“I’m gonna head home and let you two get some sleep.”
“No.”
Never in all his life had he seen anyone move as fast as Faith. She practically jumped from the hospital bed into Holden’s arms. Her limbs wound around Holden like a rabid spider monkey. Her little arms wrapped around his neck, and with surprising strength, she choked the hell out of him.
“Whoa, doll,” he wheezed.
“Don’t leave me.”
That was not a timid request—it was an unholy demand. Her voice was hoarse and full of panic, her grip didn’t loosen, and her body shook.
“Faith,” Charleigh started.
“You can’t leave. You can’t, you can’t, you can’t.”
She was working herself up into a tizzy and Holden would do or say anything to calm her down.
“Okay, I won’t leave.”
Holden’s eyes went to Charleigh and his lungs seized. Silent tears streamed down her cheeks. But when Leigh-Leigh’s gaze lifted and their eyes locked, Holden learned a whole new meaning of hell.
He knew his Leigh-Leigh. Back in the day, he’d made it a point to know her every look. He could read her body language and know exactly what she was feeling. She’d hidden nothing from him. His woman was an open book. And right then, he was transported back to a time he’d never thought he’d be in again. Only now, despair coupled with the longing he saw.
Yearning. Fear. Anguish. Hope.
Holden knew he had to make a decision, and quick. But with Faith wrapped around him and Leigh-Leigh giving him that look, he had no choice.
He’d tried to walk away. He’d tried to give her a life. He’d tried to do the right thing.
But he wouldn’t be able to do it a second time.
15
They made a pretty picture.
That was my shameful thought as the vision of Holden holding my daughter turned watery.
I had to remind myself Faith was home, she was safe, and she was unharmed. Patricia and Beatrice were in jail. So was that Chad asshole who’d hit me and knocked me out. As soon as I’d opened the door and saw Patty standing behind him, I knew I was in trouble. Actually, I’d sensed the trouble before I’d opened the door. All of my instincts were screaming that there was danger behind my front door. Yet, I’d stupidly opened it anyway, thinking it was Holden I was sensing.
Even as disoriented as I was, when I’d woken up, I’d been frantic to talk to Holden, to tell him who had Faith and beg him to find her. Once Kennedy calmed me down, she explained Holden had been in to see me but didn’t stay. At first, my heart sank to a new level of despair. Then she told me Holden wasn’t at the hospital because he and Jameson were already searching for Faith. Holden had blindly gone on the hunt for my kidnapped child. With me unconscious, they had no leads. But Holden had known who’d taken Faith, and he went to Virginia prepared to do whatever he had to do to get her back for me.
And he did. He’d found her and brought her home.
Now my child was clinging to Holden like he was her lifeline. Not me—Holden. She’d leapt out of my arms into his and wrapped her tiny body around his much larger one, and from my position on the bed, I could see her trembling.
I’d hated the Towlers for years, but never had I wished horrible things upon them like I did now. I hoped they were sitting in a jail cell, scared out of their minds. I hoped they were uncomfortable. I hoped that a great many awful things happened to them while they rotted away behind bars. This time, they’d gone too far. This time, they’d awakened the vicious mama bear, and I would stop at nothing until they were ruined. They’d never see Paul’s money. They’d never, ever see Faith again. I would fight until my dying breath to ensure my child wouldn’t have to endure another second with them.
“Faith, honey, it’s late. Holden’s been busy all day. Maybe we should let him go home and get some sleep.”
“No.”
No. Just no. That was all my daughter squeaked out as she clung to Holden.
My gaze lifted and met Holden’s steely eyes. The ever-present pang of loss and grief hit me, but unlike all the other times, I couldn’t hide it. I was emotionally spent. My child had been kidnapped. Kidnapped. Stolen from my home, and I’d been powerless to protect her. The stress, fear, and pain of the day bore down on me and I couldn’t stop the tears. Relief and frustration mingled together. Anger and the deepest terror I’d ever felt boiled until I wanted to lash out and hit something, or scream, or flip the universe off for being so cruel.
“Leigh-Leigh?”
God, he needed to stop calling me that. Every time he said it another crack in my heart formed. That stupid nickname was like salt in a very open wound. One that would never heal. The gashes would always be there, bleeding, exposed, gaping.
“Babe?”
I blinked and Holden came back into focus. His features had softened, the look reminiscent of days gone by. Days and nights when he only looked at me with love and care.
“Everything’s gonna be okay,” he continued. “Faith’s home and no one’s gonna hurt her. Promise, Leigh-Leigh, both of you are safe.”
I wanted to tell him not to make me stupid promises he couldn’t keep. I wanted to tell him to fuck off and leave me alone. But I couldn’t with Faith there. I couldn’t say anything I wanted to say, which included irrationally blaming him. I wasn’t sure what I was blaming him for—nothing was his fault. But in that moment, seeing the man I’d loved for what felt like forever holding my daughter
after he’d rescued her, but not before he’d left me and broken my soul, all I could see was red.
Fury and anger welled up. Just as I opened my mouth to say something that would likely scare my daughter, Holden spoke again, “Take a breath, Charleigh.”
I clamped my mouth closed and glared at him. I hated that he was intimately familiar with my temper. I hated that he knew I was going to lose it and say something I’d regret later. Not because my words would be untrue, but because Faith didn’t need to hear.
Once Holden ascertained I had a hold on my tongue, he turned to Faith.
“Let’s get you back into bed with your mama.” Faith shook her head, the movement barely there since her face was buried in his neck. “I’m not going anywhere, but you need to get some sleep. So does your mom.”
“You’ll stay?” Faith mumbled against Holden’s throat.
“I’ll stay.”
“I don’t want you to go.”
“Faith, I promise you I’ll be here when you wake up. I’m not going anywhere.”
“You’ll protect Mommy?”
Holden’s eyes snapped back to mine and a look I’d never seen flickered. Then it was gone before I could process it.
“With my life.”
My breath hitched and my throat clogged.
I didn’t need time to process his statement, I needed to unhear the fierce determination in his voice. I needed to forget the defiant resolve in his tone. Those words were spoken to Faith but they were not for her, they were for me. Holden was telling me, without actually telling me, he was planning something. The man standing before me was the old Holden—my Holden. Not the cold, distant, Holden who had been far from my reach for years.
I wanted the faraway Holden back, the one I was determined to get over. The one who wanted nothing to do with me or Faith. I had to move on for me, for my daughter. I needed to build a life for us and find happiness.
Holden's Resurrection (Gemini Group Book 6) Page 10
