by Sommer Smith
He nodded, though. “Thank you, Lauren.”
All the lights around her became a dizzying mass of confusion. The needless loss of life hit her like a blow to the abdomen, and she began to pray for the families and all those affected by this unnecessary massacre. Lily sucked in a little breath and Lauren looked down at her. What would have happened if one gang had gotten to Lily before the other?
Chill bumps prickled along her skin at the idea of the tiny baby caught in the cross fire. The thought just renewed Lauren’s determination to protect the child.
Lily was calm and beginning to lull back into a sleep, but Lauren knew she would need a breathing treatment soon, so she unbuckled her and eased her from the carrier while the vehicle was at a standstill. She cradled the baby’s tiny, warm form to her chest.
Lauren would be lying to herself if she said she had never thought about having children of her own, but her reluctance to get into a relationship made motherhood and family a foreign dream for her. True, more people in unique family situations were adopting in modern times. But Lauren didn’t want to raise a child alone. The challenges of parenting were great, and, in her opinion, a child needed a father.
Thinking about becoming a mother made her wonder about Lily. She couldn’t deny she had formed an attachment to the infant. If anything happened to Savannah, who would raise her? Lauren hated to think of anyone else being a mother to Lily, but with no husband and a busy career, how could she even consider raising a child? But she had definitely thought about it, late at night when no one was stirring and at the oddest times, like now, when she should be worrying about other things. What would it be like to be Lily’s mother?
Grayson returned to find her singing to Lily after giving her a breathing treatment. “How’s she doing?”
“Better than a lot of us.” Lauren waved a hand around, indicating the gang members. “Did any of them survive?”
The grimace on his face told her what she needed to know. “There are a few still alive at the moment, but they are all pretty critical.”
Lauren couldn’t stop the tears from welling up. “I can’t stand to see what happened. It’s such a needless loss of life. Someone should have reached them, helped them, before it was too late to save their lives. How many of them have ever even heard about God’s love?”
“It isn’t on you, Lauren. Everyone hates to see these things happen. It’s painful to witness the evil wrought on the world by an enemy. The Bible tells us the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy.” Grayson wiped at her tears with amazing gentleness. “We aren’t meant to understand some of the tragedies of this life.”
She could feel Grayson’s eyes on her face.
“You’re right, of course. But I can’t help thinking of Lily. What if the timing had been different and she had been in the middle of this? It just makes my blood go cold.” Lauren shook her head at him, eyes filling with tears.
“God takes care of the innocent ones. We can be thankful for that.” He paused a moment. “They are going to clear us for takeoff in about ten to fifteen minutes. I’m sorry we couldn’t get more of Lily’s and your things. Can you get her by until we land? It will be about an hour flight, maybe a little longer.”
“Yes, I think we can manage. Where are we going?” Lauren felt both displaced and weary, but she couldn’t stop the questions.
“I’ll tell you later. I’m going to go finish finalizing plans and give my statement to the authorities before we get moving again.” He hopped out before she could even protest.
“Well, Miss Lily, it seems you’re going to see the whole country before you’re even old enough to remember it, from the looks of things.” Lauren sighed as the baby yawned. She didn’t appear to be impressed.
It seemed too soon that Grayson was joining Lauren and Lily in the passenger chamber of the jet as they prepared for takeoff. Lauren had never flown on such a small plane before; in fact, she had only flown once before, and she barely recalled it.
Her nervousness must have been evident.
“It’s nothing to worry about. We have the best pilots in the nation.” Grayson grinned at her. He took Lily and secured her carrier into the seat beside the one he indicated for Lauren to settle into. Shayla had just boarded the plane and was busy entering something into her phone, and Lauren noted that she missed the marshal’s sunny commentary. Shayla stepped back out of the plane then, making Lauren wonder if she was about to be alone with Lily and Grayson again.
“Shayla and Cole are coming, too, right?” Her voice sounded stronger than she felt.
“Yeah, they’ll board any minute. Why? Are you still afraid to be alone with me?” Grayson smiled again. She knew he was trying to make this whole situation easier for her, and she appreciated it, but she was still floundering.
She tried to smile back, but the attempt felt weak. “Of course. Now that I’ve seen firsthand how scary you are, I need backup.”
He watched her face. “Seriously, Lauren. I know this is a lot to take in. Are you making it okay?”
She shrugged, but her eyes filled. “I’m okay. As good as can be expected.”
“You need a distraction.” He sat beside her.
“Okay. You know all my secrets. Tell me about your family.” Her voice was slightly teasing, soft.
Grayson hesitated. “You know I have four brothers. Briggs and Beau are twins. Then there is Caldwell, and the baby is Avery. I am the second youngest.”
She nodded. “And your parents?”
Darkness clouded his expression. “My dad passed away a few years ago from cancer.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.” She paused for only a second. “What about your mother?”
He blew out a sigh and his right hand moved over his chest. “She hasn’t been in my life since my early teen years.”
Lauren just watched him expectantly, hoping he would explain.
“She was in a car accident with a friend. She nearly died. But the recovery process was extremely painful. She took high-powered pain pills for a long time to get through it.”
Lauren filled in the blanks. “She became addicted to them.”
His expression showed his surprise at her astute assumption.
“I’m a nurse. I know it isn’t all that unusual. That’s why you watched me so closely with mine.”
Grayson just nodded. “Yeah. But she grew desperate for them. She got caught stealing the pills. She ended up in prison for several years. When she got out, she never came home.”
“Oh, Grayson, I’m so sorry. She must have had her reasons.” She tried to blink back the tears.
Lauren spoke again, not wanting Grayson to feel he had to say any more. “I know it must be hard, but forgiving her would make such a difference in your life. It isn’t your fault. And I’m sure she probably misses you and your brothers terribly. No doubt she is ashamed.”
“I don’t know if I can forgive her. She abandoned us.”
“Of course you can, Grayson. You’re the strongest, kindest person I’ve ever known.” She grasped his hand.
His arms were around her before she could guess what he was doing.
“I’m sorry this is happening with Lily.” He breathed the words against her hair.
Lauren melted into him. His strong arms felt so right around her, and as she breathed in his woodsy, masculine scent, she felt all her tension begin to ease away. She felt safe in his arms, cared for, even.
Her cheek was nestled against his shoulder and she could hear his heart beating. No other embrace had ever felt so perfect and she just wanted to stay there forever.
But she couldn’t.
Even if he felt the same way...well, men’s feelings were fickle and he would end up wanting to change her and control her, just as her late husband had. She wasn’t whole, but she couldn’t fix it. She had tried. She just couldn’t ever be enough.
She pulled away. “I’m sorry, Grayson. I promised I wouldn’t be any trouble, and here I am, needing to be babied.”
“Lauren, don’t do that. Anyone would be upset by what they’d just seen. It doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.” Grayson let her go but didn’t move away.
“Then why are you and your fellow marshals just letting it roll off? Not that you don’t care, but you just don’t seem fazed by it all.” Lauren shook her head.
“Because we still have a job to do. We are trained to shut it off until we take care of business. We’ve all seen too much. I hate to say we are hardened to it, but in a way, I guess we are. At the end of the day, though, don’t ever think it doesn’t get to us.”
“I guess you have to learn to be thick-skinned to work as a marshal or you wouldn’t be able to do your job.” Lauren gave him a grateful smile. “It isn’t that I haven’t seen the results of violence. I’ve had to treat kids for stabbing and gunshot wounds in nursing school rounds. But I’ve never actually seen anyone get shot firsthand. It was awful.”
Grayson helped her settle into her seat. “Well, I haven’t seen violence like that often, but I have seen more than enough. Let’s talk about something else. Maybe getting your mind off of it for a little while will help. Tell me about your family.”
She took a deep breath. “Well, my mother is a paralegal in DC. My father died when I was just six years old. Eventually, my mother remarried—to a lawyer—and they had my younger sister, Britlan, when I was fourteen. My stepfather left not long after Britlan was born, though. They found out she was sick, and my stepfather couldn’t handle the pressure of caring for a child that needed so much attention. So my mother and I did it all.”
He looked at her in amazement. “Wow. That’s a lot to put on a fourteen-year-old.” He could relate, but it had been different with his brothers around. They hadn’t had a sick sibling to care for.
“It was, but I don’t regret it. I got a work permit and began helping financially as well as physically. I grew to love Britlan like my own child. There are days she can live an almost perfectly normal life. But there are also days she is so sick she can’t leave her bed.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. How’s your mother making it without you right now?” Grayson asked.
“Once I took the job at the hospital, we hired someone to help Britlan part-time, so she isn’t having to do it alone. I wish I knew how she’s doing, though. I hope no emergencies have come up, because they have no way to contact me.”
Grayson winced. “Why don’t you give her a call? I should have offered to let you call sooner. I’m really sorry.”
“No.” Lauren stretched out a hand and placed it on his arm. “It isn’t your fault. You had a lot of other things on your mind.”
“You should have asked me.” Grayson grasped her hand.
She smiled. “We’ve been a little busy with other things.”
“Of course. But you need to keep in touch with your family.” Grayson squeezed her fingers. He held out his phone in offering.
“You were trying to do your job. You had just unexpectedly gained custody of a newborn. That’s often traumatizing to expectant parents who had nine months to prepare.”
His laughter filled the cabin of the plane as she accepted the phone.
“What’s so funny?” Shayla ducked into the cabin.
“We were just discussing parenting.” Lauren grinned.
“More like how I know nothing about it.” Grayson made a face.
“I’d be okay with not being a dad.” Cole threw his opinion in as he followed Shayla into the plane.
“I used to think I would, too.” Grayson looked down at Lily’s cherubic face. “But I might have to reevaluate that decision. If I ever reach that point in my life, that is.”
When he cleared his throat and straightened, Shayla gave Lauren a pointed look. “Oh, is that so? I wonder what could have caused you to reconsider.” She threw Lauren a wink.
Lauren turned hot and pink. “Lily is a pretty beautiful baby. She might even convince Cole if he isn’t careful.”
Shayla rolled her eyes. “Not unless she has magic powers.”
“I’m pretty sure we have more important things to discuss right now.” Cole pulled at his collar.
“Like what?” Shayla grinned.
“Like doing our job and keeping this baby safe.” Cole gave her a stern, disapproving look.
Shayla shrugged, grin still intact.
Lauren excused herself to move aside and make the phone call.
Her mother was glad to hear from her and kept reassuring her that both she and Britlan were making it fine. She questioned Lauren about her whereabouts and why she was calling from the strange number, but accepted Lauren’s proclamation that she wasn’t able to tell her.
When Lauren returned, Grayson was asking Cole and Shayla if they had uncovered any more information on Savannah Reid’s whereabouts.
“No.” Cole shook his head. “Nothing significant. Every lead has turned up a dead end, according to Peter Finney. He’s the one heading the search.”
“She’s staying one step ahead of them, which leads me to believe she has help from someone with lots of experience running from the law.” Grayson tapped a finger on the armrest of his seat. “Or maybe we should take a closer look at Peter Finney and anyone he is closely associated with in the Marshals Service.”
Lauren focused her attention out the window of the plane as it lifted into the air. She was pressed back against the seat and felt the sudden pressure, dip and swell in her middle as they left the earth behind.
She focused on Lily. On how Grayson had become so good with her over the span of just a few days.
Lauren must have drifted off with her thoughts, because the next thing she knew, Grayson was waking her to tell her they were landing.
“I’m sorry. Is Lily okay? Where are we?” She couldn’t get all of her questions out fast enough.
“You’re just fine. I’m sure you were exhausted. Lily’s fine, too.” He paused. “And we’re in Texas. Near Austin.”
“Isn’t Texas where you thought Romine and Savannah were hiding out?” Lauren still felt fuzzy-headed from sleep. “Wouldn’t we want to get Lily farther away from Romine rather than closer?”
“Well, we’ve kind of hatched a new plan.” Grayson gave her an indulgent look. She didn’t know what to make of it.
“While I was sleeping?”
He hesitated. “It’s been in the works.”
“But I thought there was another marshal in charge of finding Romine and Savannah. What other purpose could you have for coming to Texas?”
“There is. But eventually Romine is going to come after Lily himself, so we are going to put him on notice. If we can lure him in, we should easily end up cracking this whole case.” He frowned and she felt like there was something he wasn’t telling her.
“Wait. You’re not thinking of using Lily as bait, are you?” Lauren still didn’t quite know what was going on, but it was the only thing she could think of.
“Actually... Savannah and Romine aren’t the only ones in Texas. Senator Reid is here. He’s visiting an old friend who lives in Austin. We’ve been in contact with him.”
The plane touched down, jolting them and interrupting Grayson’s words. She looked at Shayla and Cole, who were both suspiciously quiet.
“He wants the baby.” Lauren’s soft words held a touch of anguish.
Grayson looked at Shayla. She nodded. “You should tell her everything.”
Lauren crossed her arms at her chest. “Yes. You should.”
Grayson sighed. “He wants to see her, just to assure himself she’s safe. We don’t think Romine will let that happen. We’re going to leak word that Senator Reid is meeting with us. We think Romine will come after her himself.”
/> “What? You are using Lily as bait! You can’t do this, Grayson.” Lauren was furious. How could he endanger Lily like this? And to think she had begun to believe he cared for them.
“It isn’t like that, Lauren. She’ll be safe the whole time. I guarantee it. The plan is to take Lily in another direction, but Romine doesn’t have to know it.” Grayson gave her a pleading look. “This is the only way to get this over with.”
She felt the hot sting of tears behind her eyelids.
Shayla took Lily and followed Cole from the cabin of the plane, taking the nebulizer and diaper bag also. Lauren rose to follow them, but Grayson stopped her.
“Wait, Lauren. We need to talk about this. Let me explain.”
“There’s nothing to explain. It’s just a case to you. It’s all about getting the job done. I don’t know what made me forget that.”
She squeezed her eyes shut. This wasn’t supposed to happen. She didn’t want to care for Grayson or Lily, but she did. And now Grayson was going to know. And he was going to reject her.
* * *
Grayson’s chest squeezed with emotion as he watched Lauren fight her tears. This was exactly why he had to wrap this up now. He wasn’t supposed to feel this way about Lauren. The longer the case dragged on, the worse it was going to hurt when they parted ways. And no matter what happened with Lily, they would have to part ways eventually.
“It is a case, yes, Lauren. I have a job to do. I would never endanger you and Lily, though. We have a solid plan and I’ll keep you and Lily safe. I hope that in less than twenty-four hours we will have Romine in custody, and you will be headed back to DC to return to your life.”
He meant the words to be comforting, but he somehow didn’t get the response he’d expected. Her face scrunched up in something like a wince, and she shook her head.
“How do you know Lily will be safe just because you capture Romine? Aren’t there other people after her, too? Didn’t we just determine that?” Lauren looked away from him.
