by Derek Slaton
Pete shook his head. “Nah I’m good, it’s just time to move on to another story.”
“Buddy’s gonna get you, Buddy’s gonna get you,” Ritchie sang. “Hey, maybe that’s who Daphne saw down by the river!”
“Excuse me,” the brunette whispered as she bolted from her seat. Pete reflexively grabbed her hand before she shook it loose and kept moving. “I’m fine, I just need some water.”
Pete stood, shaking his head as she disappeared into the lodge. “You happy now, asshole? The next time I say move on then you move the fuck on, you got it?”
“Dude I’m sorry, I…I didn’t mean-” Ritchie stammered.
“Save it, man. Look, she hasn’t shared this with a lot of people, but when she was ten her mother was killed by a stalker,” Pete explained.
Ritchie slumped to the ground, realizing he fucked up bad.
“She saw the man following them but didn’t say anything, so she blames herself for the murder. Seeing whatever she saw in the woods today spooked her good. So everybody, drop the Buddy Bagwell shit, we clear?” Pete glared at the group.
“Yeah man we got it, and if this little shit says anything I’ll beat his ass personally,” Cooper said as he smacked Ritchie in the back of the head.
The dejected storyteller grunted from the impact.
“Alright, well look, I’m gonna go check on her. So we’ll see y’all when you come in,” Pete said and left the circle.
“Speaking of that hon, you ready to go have a little fun?” Marie asked as she slid her hand into Edgar’s lap.
“Ain’t gotta ask me twice,” he replied, grabbing her hand and leading her away.
“And on that note we’re off to check off a box on our fucket list,” Cooper declared.
“It’s getting a little cold tonight, so we may have to check something off that can be done indoors,” Heather replied.
He winked. “Yeah, I got a couple things that fit the bill.”
Ritchie watched as his tormentor ran off to have passionate sweaty sex with his dream girl. To complicate matters, that wasn’t even the worst part of his evening. He still had to go apologize to Daphne. But that was going to have to wait because he still had beer.
“Well Jake, looks like it’s just you and me,” he said.
Jake pulled himself off the ground, his half eaten cheeseburger plummeting to his feet in the process. “Nah sorry man, but I gotta head back down to the lake and finish my conversation from earlier,” he slurred as he stumbled off down the moonlit trail. “You have a good night brother, we’ll see you tomorrow.”
Ritchie toasted himself. “To Ritchie! Hopefully tomorrow is less fucked than today!”
CHAPTER EIGHT
The moonlight illuminated the path to the lake enough that even the doped up teenager could find his way through without landing on his face. Jake stopped just short of the clearing to spark a blunt the size of a baby’s arm. He puffed several times to get the ember evenly smoldering.
“Oh yeah… mmmm… goddamn,” he croaked as he held the smoke in his lungs. When he exhaled, a massive cloud enveloped him and left a haze hovering at the tree line. “So where’s my friend at?” He asked as he stumbled down to the edge of the pier. “There you are!” He kneeled down at the sight of his watery doppelgänger.
His mumbling conversation continued until there was a loud thud against the wood on the pier. Jake bolted to his feet and to attention, a reflex brought on by several encounters with cops.
“Hey, I’m good, how are you?” He blurted, keeping his expression level.
It took his eyes a moment to focus, and even when they did he couldn’t fully grasp the sight in front of him. A giant of a man, six foot four, three hundred pounds, dressed in dark and dingy tattered work clothes that were singed along the edges. Grimy bandages caked with dirt encircled his face and arms.
“Whoa man, you’re a big dude,” Jake stammered as he stepped forward, extending his blunt in the process. “I don’t know if you’re gonna feel this or not, but man, you can totally hit it if you want.”
The man lifted his right arm a couple feet off the ground, grasping the wooden handle of a rusted pickaxe. As Jake kept walking the mysterious stranger slammed the metal head to the ground, splintering the wood and causing Jake to flinch at the sound.
Despite the Keith Richards level of drugs in his system, Jake sobered up very quickly. “Hey man, I’m, yeah, I’m just gonna ahead and go home. You, you have a great night.” He took a deep breath before making his move towards dry land, only to face off with the blunt end of the pickaxe slamming into his chest.
The impact drove the air from his lungs and sent him tumbling to the pier, landing hard on his back. As he gasped, his attacker stepped towards him. He tried to plead for mercy as he scrambled backwards, but he could only wheeze.
Jake was finally able to climb to his feet before reaching the end of the peer, throwing his hands up in the universal “please stop” position. His visual pleas fell on blind eyes.
The hulking beast flung the pickaxe up, driving the tip up into the stoner’s jaw. With a violent pull, the bottom portion of Jake’s mouth shattered, splattering teeth and blood onto the wooden planks.
He gurgled out some pitiful sounds as the blood from his partially severed tongue flowed down into his lungs. The grungy savage raised the pickaxe as high as he could, towering over his floundering victim.
Jake made one more futile attempt to plead with the sadist before rusted steel pierced his body. The crown of the blade entered through his collarbone at an angle, the force driving it through his internal organs before cracking into his hip bone.
He remained upright for only another moment, legs quivering from the shock. Finally they gave out, sending his shattered teenage body tumbling backwards into a watery grave.
The beast stood at the end of the pier, admiring his handiwork before his lips parted.
“Heheheheheheh.”
CHAPTER NINE
The water kettle whistled like a locomotive rolling through a small town crossing. Pete rushed over to remove it from the heat so that it wouldn’t disturb the others. He knew they wouldn’t be sleeping, but he didn’t want to be blamed for any performance issues they may have.
“Do you want one tea bag or two?” Pete asked Daphne, who was curled up on the couch with a blanket draped over her.
“One’s fine,” she replied.
He slipped one bag into a mug. “Cream and sugar?”
“Do they even have cream and sugar?” she asked.
“Excellent question,” he replied as he opened the fridge. “Well, the only thing in the refrigerator are a half dozen bottles of moonshine, let me try the cabinets.” Pete opened the cabinets to find them stocked with even more moonshine. “At the moment I can offer you two varieties of moonshine, chilled and room temperature.”
“Just the tea will be fine,” Daphne said, cracking a small smile at the absurdity of the situation.
He delivered the warm ceramic cup to his woman, who cradled it to protect every drop.
“Thank you for taking care of me Pete. I’m sorry I’m so jittery,” she said.
“Hon, you don’t have to apologize for anything,” he replied, draping his arm around her in the process. She took another sip before leaning in and placing her head on his shoulder.
Their first real moment of peace and quiet since they arrived was broken as Ritchie came inside.
“Hey Daphne, I really want to-”
“Dude, just keep on walking up to your room,” Pete snapped. “You’ve done enough tonight.”
“I just want to apologize to her and then I’ll leave you two alone,” Ritchie protested.
“Pete, it’s okay,” the brunette assured him as she straightened up.
Their host walked over to the couch and kneeled down beside them. “Daphne, I’m so sorry I upset you. I was just trying to have a little fun and fit in with these guys. I didn’t know about your mom, and if I had I wouldn’t have told the story.”
“You told them about my mom?” Daphne gaped at her boyfriend. “Why would you do that?”
“Because they were worried about you hon, just like I am. And I figured if I told them they’d stop with the Buddy Bagwell crap so you could enjoy the rest of the trip,” Pete told her.
Her eyes softened at his reluctant expression and she nodded. “I understand,” she said, squeezing his knee in silent thanks. “And Ritchie, it’s okay, I know you didn’t mean to frighten me.”
“And look, if you’re not having a good time and want to leave in the morning, I’ll take you home whenever you want.” Ritchie promised.
“Thank you Ritchie,” she said with a kind smile, putting his guilty conscience to rest.
“Alright, I’m gonna go get some rest. I’ll see y’all in the morning, okay?”
“Goodnight Ritchie,” the couple said in unison. As he disappeared up the stairs Daphne resumed her comfy position against her boyfriend’s shoulder.
“I think I just made a mistake,” the brunette said suddenly.
Pete furrowed his brow. “How so?”
“Well I just got myself comfortable, and you’re going to have to get up in a second to get me more tea,” she teased.
“So that’s how it is, huh?” He grinned. “You just snap your fingers and I do your bidding?”
“See, I’m not the only brilliant one in this relationship, you picked up on that pretty quick. Besides, you wouldn’t have me any other way and you know it.” She fluttered her eyelashes.
“Yeah, you got me there,” Pete said as he kissed her forehead. “So one tea bag and no moonshine?”
Daphne smiled. “You know me so well.”.
CHAPTER TEN
Ritchie got to the top of the stairs, moving quietly down the hall towards his room. The floor was silent, bringing him a bit of relief. The evening had been rough enough without the prospect of having to listen to his nemesis railing the object of his desire.
Luckily the door cooperated by not creaking as it swung open, giving him what he thought was his first break of the night. It was late, and the only thing he wanted to do was crawl into bed to get a good night’s rest. Maybe have a dirty dream or two of the milky skinned goddess in the next room.
He plunked himself down onto the bed, resulting in an eardrum-shattering creak from the rusted bedsprings.
He immediately tensed in an attempt to prevent any more noise. He sat motionless for a few long seconds before his fear was realized.
Cooper moaned loudly from the next room. “Ohhhhh yeah baby, how you like that?”
“Fuck my life,” Ritchie muttered to himself. The squeaking of the bedsprings, the soft moans of pleasure from Heather, and the self boasting from Cooper resonated in his brain.
Desperately needing a distraction, Ritchie grabbed a couple of comic books from his bag and leaned up against the headboard to read. He hoped that envisioning himself as a cape wearing superhero beating down douchebags like Cooper would keep his mind from picturing what was going on in the next room.
“Ohhh yeah girl, you like that big dick don’t you?” Cooper said, raising his voice with every thrust. “Yeah, you’re getting it good!”
As the moans and egotistical boasting grew louder, the skinny nerd threw a Hail Mary and gently knocked on the wall in the hopes that it would shame them into being quiet. Cooper seemed to take this as a challenge, upping the volume and adding banging on the wall to the audible torment.
“Yeah girl take that cock!” he yelled as Heather’s moaning reached a crescendo.
Ritchie focused all of his attention on the illustrated pages before him, but to no avail. Every word he read was drowned out by the cock-bag in the next room.
“Hey! Unless you want a third can you keep it down?!” he yelled as he lost his last shred of sanity.
Much to his surprise, the noise from the adjoining bedroom ceased almost immediately. Ritchie wondered if he had impeccable timing, or if Cooper was just taking a moment to figure out how to torment him further.
With the sound of every footstep and the creak of their bedroom door opening, his heart pounded harder in his ears. He feared his punishment for this would be a swift beating; he could only hope for more swift than not.
Knockknockknock.
Ritchie gulped as the quick raps echoed in his room.
Knockknockknock.
Figuring the longer it took him to answer the more trouble he would be in, Ritchie stood up to take his beating like a man. He took a deep breath, and opened the door, ready to receive a pop to the face.
Instead, his mouth dropped open at the creamy skin of his goddess. Heather licked her lips and leaned on the doorframe, accentuating the swell of her breasts practically leaping out of the low cut bodice of her black silk teddy.
“Hey Ritchie,” she purred, “I just wanted to come over here and apologize. Cooper may have went a little too far just now, and that wasn’t right.”
He struggled to verbalize anything other than half gasps, but finally forced out something resembling English. “It’s… it’s okay. Hea…Heather.”
“Aww, I’m glad you’re so forgiving,” she whispered as she leaned in a little closer. Her fingertip made contact with his chest and slowly moved south, lightly drawing patterns as she descended. “You know, you’re so sweet. I don’t know why I never noticed that before.”.
His heart raced faster than a junkie blowing an entire 8-ball. If the blood hadn’t been rushing from his brain to elsewhere he might have realized this was too good to be true. At the moment, however, the only thing his mind could do was prevent him from visibly drooling.
“Ritchie, I’m going to share a little secret with you. Something that a lot of girls won’t admit.” Heather lowered her voice. “The bad boys like Cooper only get the girls until a good guy comes along. Once that happens it’s only a matter of time before the bad ones are out, and the good ones are in.”
Her hand gently caressed the bulge in his pants, causing his body to spasm like it had been hit with a stun gun. She recoiled in disgust when her fingers came into contact with a warm sticky substance.
“Oh my god, did you just fucking cum?” she shrieked in horror, and took a step back.
“You bitch,” Ritchie muttered as he grabbed his shoes and ran down the stairs, face reddening into almost purple as his blonde unicorn burst into hysterical laughter.
He stormed by Daphne and Pete without breaking stride.
“Ritchie, you okay? Where are you going?” the brunette asked.
“I’m going to the lake,” he snapped. “Y’all really need to pick better friends.” Ritchie paused by the kitchen door, opened a cabinet and grabbed a big mason jar of moonshine before storming outside.
Daphne and Pete sat in stunned silence, just looking at each other with confusion. Their moment was broken by Heather coming downstairs.
“Heather, what’s going on?” Daphne demanded. “Ritchie just ran out of here all upset. Did you do something?”
“Yeah, I kinda embarrassed him,” she admitted, a blush creeping up her cheeks.
Daphne pursed her lips. “What did you do to him?”
“It was just a joke that went too far. I was teasing him and he kinda fired off a shot. You know, like in his pants?” she explained.
“You made that little fucker cum?” Cooper yelled as he came down the stairs. “For fuck’s sake, you said you were just going to talk dirty to him, not jerk him off!”
“It’s not like that Cooper!” Heather cried as he walked by her, brushing off her attempts to grab him.
“Yeah whatever, I’m going out for a smoke. Try not to jerk Pete off while I’m gone,” he snapped and slammed the kitchen door with such force that the windows rattled.
“Sorry guys, I gotta go apologize to him or the rest of this trip is going to suck for everybody,” Heather said as she scurried up the stairs to get shoes and adequate outdoor clothing.
Pete sighed. “What do you think hon, we ta
ke a private vacation next time?”
“I think that’s a given, but at the moment I’m more concerned with making it home from this one,” Daphne replied.
“Oh don’t worry babe, Ritchie’s a good kid, and on top of that I think he likes you. He wouldn’t have apologized like he did otherwise. So it’s unlikely he’d abandon us out here,” Pete said as Heather ran through the living room and out the kitchen door. “Those two, however? Yeah they’re probably hitchhiking out of here. Us? We’re good.”
